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Detroit, 8:11 AM
Sun Nov 29
8 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #taurusshoaccident more →

    First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Novaload Novaload
    06/23/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    So it comes in a hatchback now?


    Seriously, a car with an ass as big and bright as a baboon's--and some idiot still hit it?

     Reply
    Novaload was starred Novaload was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    Too early for "Save the SHOs?"
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    That's one down, now for the rest of the fleet.


    Com'on Jalops, if we all work together, we could rid ourselves of these boring as bible bashing buckets of automotive blasphemy.

     Reply
    LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard was starred LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard was unstarred
    Image of vwminispeedster, pronounded Si-trow-in vwminispeedster, pronounded Si-trow-in
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    It looks like a Kool-Aid Man after an encounter with a really well built brick wall. OHH NOOO!!
     Reply
    vwminispeedster, pronounded Si-trow-in was starred vwminispeedster, pronounded Si-trow-in was unstarred
    Image of Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    With Wes' seductive ass, no wonder somebody rear-ended him...
     Reply
    Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing was starred Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    06/23/09

    @Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing: Would that make Wes a Ho for SHO?
     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    Salesman to demo driver:


    "You okay buddy? Let's walk around a little bit...walk that crash off, y'know?"

    (takes a deep, loud breath, looks down at shirt, casually brushes airbag dust off of silk tie)

    "So... what'd you think of the car? Nice, huh? You think you're ready to buy today? We've got a bunch of undamaged ones on the lot, but I bet I could make you a really sweet deal on this one! What kind of payment you looking for?"

     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    06/22/09

    @FlakJack: Never missing a beat...
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of FlakJack FlakJack
    06/22/09

    @leavethegun-takethecannoli: Exactly. Why not take a chance to earn yourself a ticket into the Car Salesman Hall of Fame?
     Reply
    FlakJack was starred FlakJack was unstarred
    Image of ummagumma82 ummagumma82
    06/22/09

    @FlakJack: I like to imagine it more like..


    Salesman: "...and of course you've got your dual sun visors up here. They also swivel to the side to block glare no matter where it's coming from! This model also features the upgraded vanity mi--"


    Customer: "Seriously, if you don't stop talking, I am going to stop the car RIGHT HERE and walk home."


    Salesman: "Sorry, no problem! Just take your time. Speaking of which, check out that standard digital clock located conveniently"


    SCREEEEECH-BANG!!!

     Reply
    ummagumma82 was starred ummagumma82 was unstarred
    Image of Tossed Accord taco salad over Malibu face Tossed Accord taco salad over Malibu face
    06/23/09

    @ummagumma82:


    Just as a snide comment...


    I H A T E sunvisors. Thats what sunglasses are for.


    And I sure as hell dont like being told where shit is.


    And ya need to turn up the severity of the BANG part. I bet some yahoo was probably on jalopnik looking at RAY as he's mackin some hot car.. and *stomps on brakes... SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECHHHHHH-B A N G. *throwing all kinds shit forward, headrests pop off, airbags dont go off...

     Reply
    Tossed Accord taco salad over Malibu face was starred Tossed Accord taco salad over Malibu face was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/23/09

    @Tossed Accordtaco salad over Malibu: "That's what sunglasses are for."


    Hah, you're right, for those of us that aren't two quick steps from legally blind without our glasses.


    Yes, they make sunglasses that fit over 'em. No, they don't make them comfortable.


    And yes, I have those Transitions lenses. They rely on UV light to change, so good luck convincing them when you're inside a car.


    Sunvisors are a necessary evil.

     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/23/09

    @Taco Mudplushroomz: "us" being Jalopnik; I'm in the category that are.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of UglyDuckCar UglyDuckCar
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    Is it too immature to crack a "threeway" joke? yes? Darn ok, um...


    Does the dealership overcharge themselves for ridiculous repair costs? :)

     Reply
    UglyDuckCar was starred UglyDuckCar was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/22/09

    @UglyDuckCar: Are you new here? ;)
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of TimTim TimTim
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    Oooooh, ChiCAGO... My mind went to a completely different Chi-Town, along with "no surprise there" and "hell, I can't swim, I know I can't. Ya know what I do?"
     Reply
    TimTim was starred TimTim was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/22/09

    @TimTim: Get your uh, ass out the pool?
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of Hello Mister Walrus Hello Mister Walrus
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    The interesting thing is that this seems to be hit from behind.
     Reply
    Hello Mister Walrus was starred Hello Mister Walrus was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/22/09

    @Hello Mister Walrus: Sun reflected off that chrome right into 'is eyes. Damn shame.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of TimTim TimTim
    06/22/09

    @Hello Mister Walrus: I thought the same thing at first, but Roy's busy in NYC with that Camaro.
     Reply
    TimTim was starred TimTim was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/22/09

    @TimTim: Or so he says...
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of weatherman weatherman
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    So I guess the brakes are pretty good on the new SHO, eh?
     Reply
    weatherman was starred weatherman was unstarred
    Image of A strolling player A strolling player
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    That's totalled? Can't be repaired for much less than $38k?


    My ass, I'll take it for the drivetrain alone! That'll fit right in the Prius. An AWD setup installed backwards is still AWD, right?

     Reply
    A strolling player was starred A strolling player was unstarred
    Image of PowerTryp, Starless wonder. PowerTryp, Starless wonder.
    06/22/09

    @A strolling player: With one gear forward and 6 back! SWEET REVERSE HOONAGE!
     Reply
    PowerTryp, Starless wonder. was starred PowerTryp, Starless wonder. was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/22/09

    @PowerTryp: Good times never seemed so good!
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Pessimippopotamus Pessimippopotamus
    06/22/09

    @A strolling player: ???? Rear engined AWD Prius?


    So, since this is a preproduction vehicle, its nonsensical insurance value must be what, $80,000?

     Reply
    Pessimippopotamus was starred Pessimippopotamus was unstarred
    Image of A strolling player A strolling player
    06/22/09

    @Pessimipposaurus: Absolutely.


    @PowerTryp: Absolutely.

     Reply
    A strolling player was starred A strolling player was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/22/09

    @A strolling player: I believe it's actually DWA.
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/23/09

    @Jo $chmo: His Prius? It'll be a Douchemobile With Attitude.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    That ain't totalled, is it? Doesn't look that bad at all.


    /dibs on the engine/transmission

     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of ptschett ptschett
    06/22/09

    @Taco Mudplushroomz: Looks like that will buff right out.
     Reply
    ptschett was starred ptschett was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/22/09

    @ptschett: Most of it will!
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    Dragon wanted to eat some of that bread.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    06/22/09

    In reply to First Smashed-Up 2010 Ford Taurus SHO In Chi-Town
    It's got manufacturer's plates.


    Methinks someone's not going to getting cars for review anymore...

     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
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