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Detroit, 7:03 AM
Fri Nov 27
1 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #stolencar more →

    How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans

    Bear Steels Car, Bear Driving Car, How Can That Be?
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    Well, Mazda is part of the Ford family of vehicles, which are notorious for slipping out of "Park" into "Reverse".


    Ergo she should be thankful that her car didn't back over her while she ran back there to check...

     Reply
    Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing was starred Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing was unstarred
    Image of Boosted Lego Wagon Boosted Lego Wagon
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    In Soviet Russia, Mazda3 lets you get your hands on girl's cans.
     Reply
    Boosted Lego Wagon was starred Boosted Lego Wagon was unstarred
    Image of theart theart
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    It's a fake. Nobody stops right away for just a noise like that. They keep driving and hope that it will stop on it's own. Maybe turn the radio up. For this to work you need to stuff the tailpipe with something that's going to make a bunch of smoke.
     Reply
    theart was starred theart was unstarred
    Image of Miscellanea Miscellanea
    11/24/08

    @theart: You mean like this?
     Reply
    Miscellanea was starred Miscellanea was unstarred
    Image of theeastbaykid theeastbaykid
    11/24/08

    @Miscellanea: Look man, I ain't fallin' for no banana in my tailpipe!
     Reply
    theeastbaykid was starred theeastbaykid was unstarred
    Image of RoninianHoon RoninianHoon
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    PFFRFFT, is all i have to say about this...
     Reply
    RoninianHoon was starred RoninianHoon was unstarred
    Image of BoomhauerTX BoomhauerTX
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    This assumes way too much that women are that astute about the mechanical sounds of their vehicle.


    True story from my household as a kid:


    Dad "What happened to the car bumper?? It's missing.."

    Mother "You mean it's not there??"

     Reply
    BoomhauerTX was starred BoomhauerTX was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    11/24/08

    @BoomhauerTX: My mother came home -- in my dad's pickup -- with the front bumper sticking straight out in front of the truck at a 90-degree angle, bent in the middle. It formed a lovely L-shape. Her only explanation was that she had trouble backing it out of a parking space at work.
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of wrx-tyrannosaurusWrx wrx-tyrannosaurusWrx
    11/24/08

    @BoomhauerTX: My mother took out our mailbox with her minivan, one early morning, years ago, only to continue driving as if nothing had ever happened. She only realized it when she got home and we had spent all day laughing at her. I spent that summer building a stone mailbox with my dad to ensure she would, at least, notice if she hit it again.
     Reply
    wrx-tyrannosaurusWrx was starred wrx-tyrannosaurusWrx was unstarred
    Image of bzr bzr
    11/24/08

    @BoomhauerTX: My mom once drove 2 miles back home with the handbrake on, then asked me why the car was making all this white smoke and feeling really slow.


    It's a common mistake to not notice the brake light at first, but over two miles? And this is why we can't have nice things.

     Reply
    bzr was starred bzr was unstarred
    Image of domino domino
    11/24/08

    @bzr loves you long time:
    a college friend's sister was drove quite a distance with the parking brake on. when the car starting making a horrible noise, she just floored the gas and continued driving. she thought the engine magically lost most of its power the previous night, and driving with the pedal to the floor was the remedy.


    ugh, women drivers.

     Reply
    domino was starred domino was unstarred
    Image of Elhigh Elhigh
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    "Just Divorced"
     Reply
    Elhigh was starred Elhigh was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    11/24/08

    @Elhigh: Bwahaha. Well done.
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of scroggzilla raids again scroggzilla raids again
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    hmmmmm.......Bush must've finally cut the Phoenix Foundation's funding.
     Reply
    scroggzilla raids again was starred scroggzilla raids again was unstarred
    Image of layabout layabout
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    As fake as a porn star's tits.
     Reply
    layabout was starred layabout was unstarred
    Image of PatFromGundo PatFromGundo
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    Real or not, I'm a little chilled by how much worse this could have gone for this young woman.
     Reply
    PatFromGundo was starred PatFromGundo was unstarred
    Image of GayEuterpe GayEuterpe
    11/24/08

    @PatFromGundo: Agreed. Noting that this is most likely staged and understanding that her friend drove off in her pretty new car, thus leaving her stranded for, oh I don't know, 30 seconds or so, does leave one with quite a chill when considering the life long effects of such trauma.
     Reply
    GayEuterpe was starred GayEuterpe was unstarred
    Image of PatFromGundo PatFromGundo
    11/24/08

    @GayEuterpe: I guess I should have said "Had this been real." Perhaps then my natural concern as a husband, son, and brother might not have been met with such callous derision.
     Reply
    PatFromGundo was starred PatFromGundo was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    The last time someone tied cans on the back of my car like this, I ended up on the losing end of a hostage situation--when all was said and done, I lost my identity, my freedom, most of my assets, and about 2/3 of my paycheck. Plus, you could barely see through the "Just Married" on the back window.
     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of tekamul tekamul
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    Let's say you're MacGyver,

    I'm listening.....

    you've turned to a life of crime and need to steal a car

    Ouch. I guess the syndication funds have dried up. Doesn't anyone watch the USA network anymore?

    ...Of course you punch a hole in each can, string them together...

    Sweet! Hobo nunchucks!!

    As clever as this plan may be, we suspect it's probably staged

    Well duh!! That's why it's on TV!


    /voices in my head

     Reply
    tekamul was starred tekamul was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    11/24/08

    @tekamul: That, sir, earned you a hearty-clicky from me. The voices in your head entertain me.
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    11/24/08

    In reply to How To Steal A Mazda3 With Only Your Wits And Some Tin Cans
    Total bunk:


    1. She stops IMMEDIATELY. Nobody would have noticed that quickly


    2. She's female, but didn't call AAA, her dad, or her boyfriend before getting out.


    OK, mostly just the first one. The second one was just Jezebel trolling.

     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
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