We at Jalopnik are always happy to provide consumer advice that we're sure is applicable in your day-to-day schedules. Here's how you start a tractor Australian-style. First step? Break out the short shorts.

If you're in the Maryland/D.C. area and curious about why traffic along the Baltimore-Washington Parkway (Maryland 295) is so backed up it might be the crazy anti-speed camera nut with a shotgun and sledgehammer roaming the woods. Police are on the scene trying to find him.