After taking heat from them for being "too good to walk," Texans running back Arian Foster decided to show appreciation for his offensive line by buying each one of them a Segway for Christmas, which he seems to love as much as poetry and veganism.
While we'll forever smile at the goofy little Segway for almost succeeding where so many
pretzels assassins haven't even bothered to try, we're with the Dutch on this one. The rent-a-authority-figures outside our favorite pub ride Segways. And they do nothing but wear loud yellow shirts and get in the way of people on…