[HFL]

Photo Credit: TORSTEN SILZ/AFP/Getty Images

That’s ape as in Italian for honeybee, so think Apis mellifera instead of the superfamily Hominoidea and pronounce it ah-PEH. And don’t look for a V8 engine: the one in the Ape has a single cylinder of 3 (three) cubic inches. Upgrades are available which up that to a whopping fifteen, good for high-speed pizza deliveries followed by burnouts in the piazza.

The Ape you see here is from 1969. Its current owner purchased it in Naples, where it was used to deliver salami and cheese, just as intended. And like every proper Italian machine which stirs the heart, this one is mid-engined. So mid-engined, in fact, that all three cubic inches of that rat-tat-tat two-stroke little wonder are right beneath the bench you sit on. Flip it up and you can get your fingers dirty right away.

By the time this Ape was manufactured in 1969, the design was already two decades old. Similar to every tiny post-war European vehicle, it was borne out of necessity and poverty: another cheap, no-frills construction to get the economic heart of Europe pumping. The idea was Corradino D’Ascanio’s, the man who’s had a hand in everything from the Vespa to the Lambretta to the Agusta helicopter. In fact, the Ape is nothing but a Vespa with two rear wheels and a cabin.

They are clearly workhorse machines, a bit rough in places, but this cappuccino-colored panel van transcends its utilitarian roots to become a three-wheeled cube of desire. Both the size and the dimensions hit the cuteness receptor in the human brain with a mighty thud. Kids, as you can see, cannot resist at all.

The Ape is probably as alien a solution to the American idea of trucking as the occasional Ford F-250 is to a European inner city. But for its natural environment, the Ape is as close to perfection as it gets. Plus, it’s a motor scooter in the eyes of the law! You can park it wherever you wish—for free. And absolutely nothing beats that in a car-choked city center.

Special thanks to Misi Szilágyi of Stipistop for loaning us his Ape. Photography by Natalie Polgar and the author. And if you really need to know: that statue of a pair of mosquito-mayfly hybrids in the pictures is located in a playground on the Vérmező in Budapest, which translates to: The Field of Blood. It was named so after Hungarian revolutionary Ignác Martinovics and his men were beheaded there on May 20, 1795.

Cars have always been associated with sex — literally in the design of Ferraris and culturally in the importance of back seat mating rituals. It looks like the Winglet, in its attempt to reduce personal transportation to its bare essence, is also dropping any sexual innuendo in favor of barefaced literalness. The Toyota Winglet looks dildo-like.

Just 25 Toyota Winglets are destined for sale in 2009 in a trial run that will include factories, airports and parks. Full scale production is projected to begin in 2010.

The Winglet compares favorably to the Segway not just in its ability to serve as a “personal massager” but in its $3,500 price (Segway: $5,300+) and 22-pound weight (Segway: 105 Lbs +).

Toyota envisions uses ranging from security in public places to speedy inter-office transportation for on-the-go execs. Like the Segway, the Winglet won’t be road-legal in either Japan or the US and most places will ban it from sidewalks, so Toyota forecasts most sales will be to companies with large campuses or to public services with large areas to cover. [MSN Japan via The Scooter Scoop]

According to Dr. Ashley Christmas of the Carolinas Medical Center in Charlotte, NC:

Upon questioning, we learned that many of these individuals had previously had their drivers' licenses revoked. These patients were very in tune to the fact that a moped was defined as a motorized vehicle with an engine less than 50 cubic centimeters, so they knew they could still drive this vehicle without a license. We suspect that many moped operators are repeat offenders, whose licenses were previously revoked.

Have we stumbled upon a solution for one of society's great ills? Get a DUI, get sentenced to driving only scooters. We'd much rather be T-boned by a drunk driving 100 pounds of plastic at 30 MPH than an Expedition. They'd have to be Sprees, of course. [PRNewswire, Sub. Req.; Photo Credit: Geekologie.com

The scooter Jeremy is riding is a Vespa GTV, which comes in 125 and 250cc versions. We don’t know if he has a motorcycle license, but if he doesn’t, Clarkson was violating the law by not equipping the scooter with L plates (which are used in the UK to signify that a learner rider is operating the vehicle). Learners are allowed to operate motorcycles of 125cc or less, so if this is the 250cc version, that could be a further violation. That machine makes about 22 HP and is capable of reaching 76 MPH, in excess of the national speed limit.

Clarkson once said, “Some parents say drugs are the biggest threat to youngsters. I disagree. Every weekend, everyone under 25 takes crack, smack and E and very few are harmed. Bikes are far more dangerous.” [The Daily Mail via Moto Meme]

Yes, the Honda Motocompo could transform by collapsing its handlebars into the seat. After that, it was small enough to be picked up by one person and fit snugly in the rear cargo area, with enough room left for a saxophone, a boombox, and all your tennis equipment. Of course, the City may not be very nimble all loaded down. As for the Motocompo, it had a 49cc two-stroke good for a top speed of about 30mph. Maybe Honda should sell the new Fit with a scooter — you know, since everyone's talking about gas prices and stuff.
[3yen, JapaneseNostalgicCar]

Featuring a five-mode switch, riders can choose between three different hybrid modes - optimizing performance, mileage and battery charge - or fully electric and reverse. All other controls remain standard.

The three HyS scooters are currently prototypes, but expect production to begin next year.

Electric scooter manufacturer Vertrix is working up a fuel-cell powered machine that'll run 155 miles on a tank of Zeppelin juice. The 500-watt cell gives the two-wheeler a top speed of 62 mph and features regenerative braking to dump juice back into the NiMH battery pack. It'll also run on reformed methanol, or can be plugged into either a 110 or 220v wall socket. We'll take ours in silver with ribs. Swastika-delete option, please. [Vectrix PDF via Hydrogen Cars and Vehicles Blog]

Transportation design student Axel Dichamp dubbed this dadaesque scooter prototype "Ploof," which could be an onomatopoeic approximation of the sound made when its image smacks against the optic nerve. Dichamp's idea was to create a Yamaha two-wheeler for adult consumers concerned with comfort. The result is a motorcycle that wouldn't look out of place parked inside a public library. The seating perch is an honest-to-goodness mid-century-modern chair, four legs and all, while the base appears to have been influenced by personal watercraft and superbikes. We had this dream too, only Jimmie "Dyn-o-mite!" Walker was at the controls, and he may have been eating cantelope. – Mike Spinelli

College Exhibition: IAAD - Yamaha Project [Car Design News]

Related:
The Fhybrid Scooter: Hydrogen Powered Hybrid Power [internal]

You remember Ron Patrick, don't you? He's the guy who built the jet-powered New Beetle whose blue-white afterburner flame's graced the pages of countless mags, lo these past several months. He's not done. We'll let Mr. Patrick describe his latest thrusty venture:

Here's my wife's Honda Metropolitan scooter. She wants it to go faster than 40 mph. So I have these two little JFS 100 jet engines and I am thinking how to put them on the scooter. Engines are 50 lbm each so weight is an issue. Will probably use air-start with a carbon fiber tank of compressed air. That saves weight since batteries will then not be needed.

Will want to make aluminum housings to go over the engines just like on a DC-9.

More at Ron Patrick's Stuff (scroll down)

Related:
Jet-Powered New Beetle; Build Your Own Buzz-Bomb Dragster! [internal]

Fhybrid: Hydrogen Propelled Scooter [Hybrid Car News]

Related:
Four Motors, No Waiting: A 640hp Electric Mini [internal]

Italy's maker of all things small and puttery, Piaggio, has come up with a high-tech scooter with three wheels. But get that picture of grandma's Tri Rider out of your mind. This trike has two wheels in the front and one in the back, a setup it shares with a couple of late-model concept cars. The Piaggio MP3 — an overachieving sibling of the Piaggio GT series — features two front wheels that tilt up to 40 degrees in turns to provide more stability, according to the company, and provide an extra disk brake with which to cut speed. It'll be available in 125cc and 250cc models at a scooteria near you.

The Piaggio MP3 [Italiaspeed]

Related:
Japan's Customized Urban Scooters [internal]

Honda's Monpal ML200 could be the company's first SUV (supermarket utility vehicle). Honda says the four wheeled sidewalk-only scooter (sorry, electric-powered personal mobility device) — to be offered in Japan for the first time this week — is particularly safe thanks to its use of technologies developed as part of Honda's ASV-3 advanced safety research vehicle project — including something called "cerebral functioning analysis." We're hoping that particular technique didn't involve someone named Abbie Normal, or a tangle of electrodes wired to a giant lightning rod sticking out of a castle somewhere in Montenegro. That would just be weird.

Related:
Honda s On-Road Safety Lab: The ASV-3, in Business Week [internal]