He’s all over YouTube: the bro with a handheld camera and a “crew” who makes a channel where he ogles supercars, including the ones he inexplicably owns, and then racks up the views and the followers to a pumping soundtrack of bad electronic music. How can you follow in his footsteps?
As I was wrestling with a 27-inch mosquito during yesterday’s sunset, I realized that summer is here and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. After the mosquito finally collapsed thanks to my high blood-alcohol level, I dispatched it with a crowbar and then immediately set to writing these crucial summer…
Oh, hello there. I just returned from the most wonderful trip up to the lake. Everyone was there. You should have come—but nooo you had to work so you can pay rent because you’re poor. I keep forgetting!
As I was thumbing through the internet while enjoying my daily rosewater soak in my gilded, claw-footed tub this morning, I came across a couple in an unfortunate financial situation that actually hit quite close to home.
I never thought I would say this.
Last week, I got into an accident.
Oh, hello. It’s your rich alter ego checking in. I must confess that despite my extreme optimism about the economy, I’ve had something on my mind.
To mine own dearest Nissan Rogue,
Over the weekend, an ad popped up on Craigslist, as they often do, of a man looking to sell his Saturn. That in itself isn’t terribly remarkable. It’s the scene that he’s leaving behind that piqued my interest.
I’ll get this out of the way right now; this is not a real ad for Lamborghini. They don’t do commercials for obvious reasons. This is supposed to be some sort of spoof, and while the production looks convincing, I’m not sure I can find the humor in it.
It seems that there’s been a presidential election recently, and that tomorrow is the Presidential Inauguration? Why wasn’t the news covering this? This seems important. It also seems that tomorrow the newest version of the Beast, the custom-built Presidential Limousine-State Car will be revealed. That made me wonder…
The old nightmare came to haunt me again last night.
They say that ignorance is bliss, and that statement has never been truer when it’s concerned me and owning a car. I never knew what a slave I was to it until now, and how much it kept me from doing important things like meetings and writing thinkpieces.
A press release this morning from Car Bow Store revealed the most radical change in the novelty oversize car gift bow industry since its inception, and now the entire car bow economy is reeling from the implications. The fundamental car bow hood-affixing technology has shifted from magnets to suction cups, and it’s…
Sales of the Ford Mustang are down here in the United States of America. Good.
Remember that time Terry Gross from NPR’s Fresh Air got banned from drag racing?
Some things may have changed since Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby was released a decade ago, but it still has one of the most dead-on mockeries of the popular perception of motorsports in America. NASCAR—for better or for worse—has a sometimes-uncomfortable association with the Southern bro.
If you looked–really looked—at the 2016 Toyota Camry, you wouldn’t expect the leggy girls in short dresses who get into the clubs for free to climb out of it. It’s humbler than that. Maybe if the leggy girl got hitched and then moved out to the suburbs, maybe. And that’s why I like it so much.