Jalopnik: Russia

Toronto Resident Rides Like A Politburo Big Chief In His GAZ Tchaika 14

Murilee Martin — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 16:00:00 EST

This is Down On The Street Bonus Edition, where we check out interesting street-parked cars located in places other than the Island That Rust Forgot. Today we're heading back to Toronto, a city that's given us all manner of interesting old iron in the past, from the Alfa Romeo Giulia Nuova Super 1600 to just about everything else. Twilight Sentinel has found one of the rarest machines of them all, a Gorbachev-grade '87 GAZ Tchaika 14… and it's for sale! Jump away to learn more.

First, we need to get in the right mood to appreciate this fine automobile. A little music, comrades?

A while back, I was running errands in Toronto's west end. As I approached a stoplight, I swore I saw the distinct profile of a Russian limousine among the crossing traffic. It was long gone by the time I got there.

A week later, I saw it again and collected these shots.

OK, so I only have 5 photos. I was rushing, my camera battery was dying, but damn, just LOOK at this thing. How thoughtful of the owner to include a little background info via window sticker. Glasnost indeed! Photographed on Parkside Drive in Toronto.

Imagine, if you will, the conversations that once took place in the back seat.

Here's a link to where the car is for sale.

Hopefully you find this interesting

What do you think about that $27,500 (Canadian) price tag? Maybe we need a Down On The Crack Pipe Bonus poll!

DOTS FAQ

Russian Police Get All-Terrain Pursuit Trucks

Ben Wojdyla — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 16:00:00 EST

Russian criminals take note, even in your Vityaz Transporter you are no longer able to outrun the long arm of the law. With the Russian police now rolling in these six-wheeled all-terrain masterpieces of awesome, cops can follow robbers to even the most remote, flooded, snowy outposts of Russia. We've heard Putin has put in an order for two and intends a safari to demonstrate his Ussuri Tiger hunting prowess. English Russia, you never fail to entertain.

Comrades! All Hail The First-Ever Soviet 24 Hours Of LeMons Car!

Murilee Martin — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 15:00:00 EST

You know what's been missing from all the 24 Hours Of LeMons races so far? That's right- Soviet-made cars! It's been tough watching all those races without the accomplishments of Lenin, Stalin, ~~and Trotsky~~ being represented on the track, but that's all going to change at the Detroit event next year, because Teargas has braved the wilds of Canada to bring back a genuine, made-in-the-USSR 1987 Lada Signet! You may remember this car from Project Car Hell Cold War Edition a while back, and making the jump will get you the rest of the story.

You'll need to start the video above to get the full effect of Teargas' story.

Natasha has arrived.
Comrade Davin and I have returned from their heroic journey to Toronto, Ontario. On the Great Hero Trailer of the Proletariat, we spirited Natasha from her prison in the only moderately socialist Canada.

Her captors were brutal, but we were able to bribe them with American Dollars.

We were detained by the Americans at the US Border. The American Border Guards trembled in fear at the sight of so much wondrous Soviet engineering. The spirit of the Soviet worker was indeed strong.

When the pigs told Comrade Reckow and I that we would need to prove that the Lada met US DOT and DEQ standards, I made it clear that Natasha would do no such thing! After an hour of negotiating, and declaring our duty-free hooch, we were free.

Comrades Rory & Davin will be awarded the ORDER OF VICTORY FOR TRAILERING

GAZ Announces End Of The Road For Volga

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 12:30:00 EDT

After nearly 53 years of production, Russian auto manufacturer GAZ has announced the end of production for the famed Volga saloon. The rolling symbol of the former Soviet Union will be put to rest in two months as a result of falling demand, high commodity prices, and cheap foreign cars flooding the market. GAZ plans to refocus their activities on their more profitable and competitive heavy truck product lines. Despite their declining quality and atrocious handling, we firmly believe that tattooed across every Russian gearhead's heart is the image of a Volga GAZ-23. We expect there will be many shots of vodka tossed back today in honor of the doomed brand. [The Guardian]

550 HP Russian E-Go Revolt Sports Car Looks Amazing

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 11:20:00 EDT

A newly-formed Russian coach builder named E-Go is apparently hard at work on their first offering, and the little Russki brand we've never heard of is aiming high. They're supposedly building themselves a sports car and naming it the E-Go Revolt. Precious little is known about the platform they're basing it off of other than it's Mitsubishi in origin. But, we've deduced from the automaker's claim that it will sport a 3.0-liter twin turbocharged V6, the car is likely built off the 1993-1999 Mitsubishi 3000GT. Not a whole lot of other cars from the diamond-triumvirate-branded automaker fit that bill. That engine, E-Go claims, is pumped up to 550 HP and mated to a six speed manual. So when's it going to be out?

No idea, but if when completed, the car will sport the handsome and aggressive bodywork you see in these renderings along with an active air suspension, 19 inch wheels, six piston caliper brakes up front with four pistons in the rear and a steering wheel-mounted touch screen LCD to act as the control center for the car.

This may not be the first sports car from the land of the ice and snow, but it certainly is the most attractive we've seen from any automaker this side of the Iron Curtain. It's most definitely not as bad-looking as it's name might suggest. [Cardesign.ru (Translated)]

Project Car Hell, Cold War Edition: Dodge Power Wagon Town Wagon or Lada Signet?

Murilee Martin — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 17:20:00 EDT

Welcome to Project Car Hell, where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! In our last foray into the Burning Garage O'Pain™, the Buick Reatta beat the Olds Troféo by a 53% to 47% poll split. We've had unifying vehicular themes for most of our Hell Challenges recently, but sometimes you need to choose between two totally different eternities- say, one in which St. Helena earwigs colonize your bile ducts, and another in which you are stuck in an Amway PowerPoint presentation 24/7. And, just for fun, we're going Warsaw Pact versus NATO, with one machine from the hottest period of the Cold War and the other from the wild and crazy endgame.

Back when we were gearing up for some toe-to-toe nuclear combat with the Rooskies, a man could walk into his friendly Dodge dealership and order him up a Town Wagon, to haul six or eight passengers reliably (if not comfortably), or he could opt for the military-truck-based four-wheel-drive Power Wagon and flee those mean ol' Tsar Bombas in an off-road run to the mountains (although you'd need to get quite a head start to escape the blast radius of the Tsar Bomba). Or, because this is the greatest nation on earth, he could have had both! Yes, you could buy a Power Wagon Town Wagon, with four-wheel-drive and lots of seats. Fine vehicle, the Power Wagon Town Wagon, but where can you find one today? They've all rusted away or tumbled down ravines, stuff like that. Except, of course, for this '60 (go here if the ad disappears), which Mad_Science has found for us in Reno. As Mad_Science observes: "note the guy in the picture for scale. Either that guy's a midget or this thing is enormous!" Does it run? Is there rust? What's the interior like? We don't know any of that, but we do know that it's only $1,695 and maybe even, as the seller claims, the "rarest 4x4 in america!" Should be an easy project!

You couldn't buy the Lada in the United States, because we didn't do business with gulag-havin' Stalinists, you betcha. However, the Canadians thought the Soviet-made Fiat 124 sedan clone was so good that they were willing to do business with the Evil Empire, if that's what it took to get their mittened hands on that fine Russian interpretation of an ancient Italian design. That means you need to head up north to Lada Land if you want an example of Late Cold War machinery for your own… and SoNaive has pinpointed the location of this fine '87 Lada Signet (go here if the ad disappears) for us. No mention of running condition is given, but is that even necessary? This is a Soviet Fiat, people! Naturally, you'll want to get on the horn to Italy right away and order up every possible hot-rod engine part you'll need to build a seriously hairy Fiat Twin Cam, or maybe you'll perform a not-yet-found-in-nature Japanese-Soviet-Italian swap and put an SR20DET in this sucka! You might have some issues getting it registered in the United States, because the Lada was never certified to meet US emissions, equipment, or safety standards, but we're sure you'll find the folks at your local DMV are eager to smooth your path to fully legal Lada ownership! Whatever you do to this car, you'll be performing the work in the manner of a Glorious Hero Mechanic Of The Proletariat, because this car comes with a set of Soviet wrenches! Oh yeah! Suddenly I must have a Soviet wrench set!

In Mother Russia, Bath Takes You!

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 14:00:00 EDT

No details, no context, but this man was apparently pulled over by authorities for driving his motorized bath tub...while bathing in it. The contraption seems to be powered by a garden tiller motor — no doubt a Soviet-era two-stroke — and a misplaced perception of ingenuity. At least he had the good sense to wear a bathing suit under those bubbles.

[Zwamneus]

Old Detroit Iron Languishes In Russian Gulag

Murilee Martin — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 16:00:00 EDT

When you try to import an old American car into Russia, you'd better meet the deadline for paying the import tax… or there'll be a knock on your door in the dead of night and the car will end up in this Moscow impound yard. What could be worse, you ask? For some good examples, we suggest Russian literature, such as f'rexample Solzhenitsyn's Cancer Ward, the protagonist of which suffers from cancer and a broken heart… in the gulag. Thanks to K5ING and SOS10 for the tip!

[English Russia]

James May Takes An Ekranoplan For A Spin

Mark Arnold — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 12:30:00 EDT

Moonlighting in this clip for his Big Ideas program, Top Gear UK presenter James May got behind the wheel of a Soviet-era ekranoplan. Piloting the small example of our favorite non-wheeled mode of transportation over a frozen body of water, Captain Slow stayed true-to-form, only bringing the ekranoplan up to not-quite-flying speed. Of course, the ekranoplan doesn't really fly in the traditional sense anyway...or does it? We'll let May explain. [BBC]

Land Rover Defender Crosses Bering Strait From Russia To Alaska

Mark Arnold — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 15:40:00 EDT

As part of an amazing trip from the UK to Alaska, a British farmer crossed the 56-mile-wide Bering Strait in his Land Rover. The 2007 Defender 110 was the latest vehicle in a development process that began back in 2004. Two giant flotation devices were fitted to each side of the SUV, which had been stripped down to the bare essentials to decrease weight. In a design similar to Richard Hammond's amphibious Van, a propeller was attached to the Land Rover's drivetrain to push the vehicle through the water. So how long did the voyage take?

The 10,379-mile trip from the UK to Alaska lasted an exhausting 50 days, with Steve Burgess and Dan Evans making the final voyage across the strait in 18 hours and 50 minutes. Why so long? The two actually had to take cover from the weather for quite a while on the island of Little Diomede partway through. Perhaps Jeremy Clarkson will bust out his Toyboata for a go at breaking the record. [CapeToCape via MotorAuthority]

Bentley Continental GT Crashes In Russian Countryside

Mark Arnold — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 17:00:00 EDT

We're not sure exactly what series of events led to the remains of the Bentley Continental GT you see here, but it was probably the most excitement this piece of prime real estate in Krasnoyarsk, Russia has ever seen. We sometimes shed a tear when we see a mangled supercar, but for this Continential, not so much. Think about it: This was never a proper Bentley in the slab-sided, blower-equipped V8, rear-wheel-drive sense. No, the Continental GT has always been more of a new-money playboy's car, and as such, they should be expected to be crashed spectacularly much to the amusement of others. It's the circle of life... or something like that. So, to whomever ran this high-dollar motorcar into the Russian countryside, job well done.

[via englishrussia]

Bermuda Triangle-Like Russian Intersection Attracts Unnatural Number Of Crashes

Mark Arnold — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 13:00:00 EDT

With a Twilight Zone-like eeriness, these photos show a compilation of accidents, all happening at one particular intersection in Russia. As with the Bermuda Triangle, there's no definitive reason why the spot has attracted so much chaos; in fact, every municipality probably has an intersection or two with a similar appetite for accidents. But rarely do you find one documented so...thoroughly.

[via englishrussia]

The Ten Fiercest Russian Military Vehicles Of All Time

Matt Hardigree — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 14:00:00 EDT

In light of Russia's recent incursion into the sovereign nation of Georgia, we thought we'd take a look at some of the fiercest non-tracked Russian military vehicles of all time. In square miles, Russia is the largest country in the world and includes every geographical variance imaginable from arid steppes, sprawling metropolises, the world's largest forest and a vicious tundra to the north. To defend such a diverse territory, their military has developed a diverse array of vehicles as extreme as the climate. Below is our list of the ten fiercest non-tracked Russian military vehicles of all time.

10. GAZ 2975 "Tiger"

Sometimes referred to as the "Russian Humvee", this high-mobility multi-purpose vehicle fills an important niche in the military. The GAZ 2975 "Tiger" or TIGR is fast, flexible and relatively comfortable when compared to larger armored trucks. It can cross rivers up to 1.2 meters deep and climb dunes at extreme angles. Compared to most of the vehicles in the modern Russian army, the Tiger actually looks modern. [Photo: AutoReview.ru, Wiki, Militaryphotos.net]

9. Zil 135

The 8-wheel Zil 135 isn't the longest truck used by the Soviets, but it's one of the toughest. Developed in the 1960's and used throughout the world, including as a missile carrier in North Korea, the 135 is designed to quickly bring artillery missiles into the range of hostile targets. Two massive 6.9-liter V8's power the truck — one for the left four wheels and one for the right four wheels. The driver's compartment is designed to seal quickly, allowing the crew of four to launch a weapon, such as the 16-rocket BM-27, and get out of range in a matter of minutes. [Photo: FAS.org, 1rota]

8. GAZ 46 Amphibious 4x4

If you're going to ~~invade~~ protect an Eastern European nation you're going to have to contend with lakes, rivers, streams and other bodies of water. That's where the GAZ 46 comes in handy. Able to speed across the country side and then toss itself headlong into the Volga, the small amphibious vehicle works as a way to transport special forces across the river or provide reconnaissance for a missile strike. [Gaz69.ru,SVSM.org]

7. BTR-152

Russia's original armored personal carrier, the BTR-152 started service in the early 1950's and has seen use ever since. The BTR-152 is essentially a Zis truck covered with a ton of armor... actually five tons of armor. The 152's open-top design may not be ideal for urban areas with snipers, but in open combat half a platoon can fire their guns over the armored sides and take down exposed enemies. The exposed roof also allows personnel to quickly jump out and engage targets. Though the truck has a few flaws — the radiator shields cause the engines to overheat if used, requiring the driver to slow down to a dangerous crawl — it's still one tough son-of-a-tsarist. [Photo: Picasa, Forum Auto]

6. BRDM-2

The BRDM-2 is a truly AAA vehicle: armored, amphibious and armed. This four-person armored scout is a fearsome foe, able to quickly cut-down enemy troops, vehicles and even helicopters and planes with its turret-mounted heavy machine gun. The BRDM-2 comes complete with shuttered windows for ultimate protection for the driver and commander, as well as a periscope and other visual aides that allow the truck to see the field of battle. Versions of the BRDM-2 still see use, including a few used by the Bulgarians in Iraq. If the original design had one flaw it was that the crew had to exit through hatches in the front, putting the crew in the line of enemy fire (and their own machine gun). [Photo: Jedsite, Militarium]

5. MAZ 537

The MAZ 537 was developed in the early 1960's as a heavy hauler and has yet to be usurped. Another 8x8, the Belarusian-built truck itself can take a 15-ton load on its own and attach a trailer that can carry 60 tons for a maximum load of 75 tons. Roads or no roads, water or ice, the MAZ can carry a tank, missile silo, scout plane... let's just say there was very little the Russian's could build that the truck couldn't carry. Its forward four wheels provide hydraulically-assisted steering, giving the truck an advantage when negotiating terrain (and parallel parking). One of these with a Russian T-90S battle tank on its back is not to be trifled with. [Photo: Armorama, RussianWarrior, MilitaryToday]

4. UAZ-469

The Russian equivalent of the Jeep, the UAZ-469 is an unassuming looking vehicle that can take an outstanding amount of punishment. This 4x4 owns the Russian terrain from the banks of Lake Baikal in the east to the peaks of the Urals to the west. The 469 is great for quick strikes with a small elite unit deep in enemy territory or carrying 12 of your heavily armed friends across the countryside. [Photo: Flickr, Wiki,Libero.it]

3. MAZ 7907

Though most of Russia's fleet of super trucks are 8x8, Russia needed something large enough and tough enough to carry a portable bridge sturdy enough to carry a tank. This explains why the 12x12 MAZ 7907 was developed. Sometimes referred to as the centipede, the rig's 24 wheels can support a total of 100 tons, allowing its portable bridge to support any trucks in the Russian fleet. Powering all of those wheels is a 1200 horsepower turbocharged gas engine. In offensive mode, the 7907 and other variants could support a rail-mobile SS-24 ICBM. [Photo: Flickr]

2. BTR-60

The replacement for the BTR-152, the eight-wheeled BTR-60 evolved the Russian APC design from the "truck with buttloads of armor" setup to the more advanced, boat-shaped hull layout. This allowed the BTR-60 to gain full amphibious availability, a foreboding profile and significant protection from small-arms fire and shrapnel. Able to transport 14 fully-armed troops across rough waters and rough terrain, the addition of a heavy machine gun with a turret (similar in design to the BDRM-2 turret) enhances the offensive ability of this fierce transport. Though no longer used extensively as an APC, the BTR-60 still sees use as a combat operations support vehicle. [Inetres.com]

1. MKZT Ballistic Missile Carrier

This is the truck that fuels all of our nightmares of a Dr. Strangelove-esque global missile volley. The longest truck in the Russian army, the MKZT can carry up to 80 tons into the coldest Siberian tundra, making it the perfect launching pad for a Topol ICBM. Though the threat of major nuclear warfare is lower than in the Cold War, it's hard not to worry a little when you see that one of these beasts and a crew of four parading down the road. Though not as quick as a UAZ-469, the MKZT can rocket its rockets at a clip of about 25 mph thanks to its 700 horsepower diesel engine. Let's hope the Olympic truce holds. [Legion via Dark Roasted Blend]

[Special thanks to the metal heads at SteelSoldiers]

Why Build An Alien PT Cruiser?

Mark Arnold — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:20:00 EDT

We've seen plenty of ridiculous customizations, but this one has got to be one of the craziest. As if starting life out as a PT Cruiser wasn't bad enough, it has since been re-sculpted with some sort of alien popping out of the front. Just looking at the photos, we can only imagine how much time it took to create this monstrosity, but why? What could possibly lead you to thinking this would be a good idea?

Well, that explains everything.
[English Russia]

Russians Turn CL Mercedes Into Red Menace, We Show You How

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 29 May 2008 13:00:00 EDT

Though companies like BRABUS will take your Mercedes CL and mold it into a V12-powerd monster, they'll only tweak the exterior so much. And what's the point of tweaking a car if you can't drop wheels on it that are many orders of magnitude larger than the stock ones, or swap the grille out for something that looks like it was taken off of a Freightliner? If you want that level of customization you'll have to skip the Germans and go straight to the Russians, specifically this Russian. Whether you love it, hate it or are afraid of it, we have photos of the process below.

There's so much going on in these photos and the result is so extreme that we're almost at a loss for post-Soviet humor. Fur coats, cardboard and technological solutions that use one half of what looks to be a two-liter bottle of 7-UP just add to the allure of this somewhat mysterious Russian (we think) custom. (h/t to Jorgen) [Fishki.net]

Gas Prices Don't Faze Russian Jeep Owners

Matt Hardigree — Fri, 23 May 2008 09:40:00 EDT

In Russia, gas prices are apparently not as big of a deal. At least not to this person, who may or may not be the nephew of an oil oligarch. [Russian Fun via CarScoop]

Save The Princess In A Lada Zhiguli

Travis Hudson — Fri, 16 May 2008 13:40:00 EDT

Found over yonder in Russia-land is this variant of the Fiat 124, presumably the Lada Zhiguli. What makes this Lada stand out among the millions of them is the matte black rims—not really, it's the amazingly accurate and detailed Mario paint job. The mural contains Goombas, pipes, coins, blocks, red-shelled Koopas and of course, Mario-himself.

[Consolenewz.ru]

Astroturf-Covered Lada Niva Brings New Meaning To Driving Range

Mark Arnold — Tue, 13 May 2008 09:40:00 EDT

We're not so sure how we feel about grass-covered cars. Sure you can make the argument that they're eco-friendly or whatever, but it just seems like so much upkeep. We would much rather have to wash and wax our car than fertilize and mow it. But what if you covered your ride with grass-like astroturf? And what if your ride was an old Lada Niva?

Examining the fuzzy surface, we can't help but think of those crappy mats you hit from at the cheap driving range. It makes us want to get up on the roof and smack a bucket of golf balls off into a giant parking lot. Imagine that, it's like a mobile driving range of destruction!
[EnglishRussia]

Lada To Race In World Touring Car Championship, We're Too Stunned To Make Russian Jokes

Matt Hardigree — Mon, 05 May 2008 10:40:00 EDT

Normally, when you see a Lada on these pages it's because it is driving in the subway or has been transformed into a monster. But this time we've got a full fledged race version of the tough Lada 110 that's hoping to compete in the WTCC series opposite 3-series bimmers and Euro-spec Accords. If this is a joke we're biting down hard because we want to believe.

Dubbed the Lada 1106, the idea of a Russian car in a European racing series is slightly more absurd than a team of Jamaicans competing in bobsledding. The entrant is the brainchild of Russian Bears Motorsport, which plans to enter two of these in the WTCC race at Valencia in a couple of weeks with the goal of finishing "into the top three of the privateers at the end of the season." Dream on you crazy Russian bears, we're with you. [RBM via autoblog.nl via World Car Fans]

Catastrophic ZAZ Rollover Leaves Russian Hoons Miraculously Unharmed

Murilee Martin — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 13:40:00 EDT

Where would we be without English Russia? We wouldn't have heard about the Stalinmobile, for starters! Most of all, we'd have to do without the all-important ZAZ hoonage! The Russians can bash 'em into trees, do epic donuts, and- of course- roll 'em. Today, we get to see in-car video of a quartet of Russians taking a Zaporozhets up to the lunatic speed of 90 KM/H, wipe out in spectacular fashion, and walk away from the wreck. That's sure to be a long trudge back to the village for these guys. [English Russia]

Hoon of the Day: Zaporozhets Donuts

Murilee Martin — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 10:00:00 EDT

We've seen Russian hoons roll a ZAZ and we've seen them smash a ZAZ into a tree. But how about taking the little air-cooled, 26-horse Russian car and adding another 150 or so horsepower? Excellent idea! Of course, when you build such a Zaporozhets, a certain amount of hoonage seems inevitable.

Vityaz Transporter, The Final Word In Post-Apocalyptic Transport

Ben Wojdyla — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 11:20:00 EDT

Let's say you need to drive through the remnants of a thermonuclear apocalypse — you know, dystopian nightmare type of stuff. Sure, you could hop into a GAZ 59037A, or any of the others included in our top ten list of the best post-apocalyptic survival vehicles, but would it really be able to pull out an errant tank mired in snow? Probably not. Because that's the point where you'll wish you'd decided on the Vityaz Transporter. Capable of going basically anywhere under basically any condition, the DT-30 is capable of carrying thirty-ton payloads and remain afloat while doing it. Do we even have to mention the zombie-crushing capabilities? [Youtube]

In Russia, Sauna Truck Goes To You!

Mark Arnold — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 16:00:00 EDT

Who doesn't enjoy a good visit to the sauna? Apparently, Russians especially like to relax in the steam, so much so that they've built this mobile unit. Yes, this ex-military truck has been converted into the ultimate sauna on wheels. From these photos, it seems like it works quite well for weekend getaways in the vast Russian wilderness. And when you're done opening your pores, you can go out in search of some off-roadin' hoonage!

Yeah, this sure beats having to go to the "health club" to sit in the steam room. With this there's no membership fee, and you probably won't end up sitting next to Oscar from Accounting, as he complains about all the new software that "corporate" is making them learn. Compare that to hanging out with these Russian dudes, it's a no-brainer.
[yaplakal.com via EnglishRussia]

And Now, Your Jalopnik Moment Of Zen...

Murilee Martin — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 18:30:00 EDT

[foto.mail.ru], thanks to BobAsh for the tip.

Underground Street Racing Taken Too Literally In Russia

Mark Arnold — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:00:00 EDT

For most people, underground racing actually happens above ground. But it seems that someone in Russia didn't get the memo. Ok, so you may not technically call this racing, but it sure looks like fun. Besides, do you really expect this guy's friends to follow him down into the subway station just because he misunderstood the figurative definition of the term "underground?" Maybe it was Amelia Bedelia at the wheel. [YouTube]

Volga Display Of Prana: Russian Automaker GAZ Seeks Partners In India

John Krewson — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 10:00:00 EDT

Apparently this has been out there for a while, but before we discussed the news that Gorkovsky Avtomobilny Zavod, manufacturers of the Volga line of hulking vehicular tragicomic props, was looking for partners on the Indian subcontinent, we needed to find press releases with the right sort of Moose-Und-Sqvirrel feel.

The actual hard news, of course, is that GAZ is most likely trying for a piece of the commercial vehicle market in auto-ascendant India, where Tata recently made headlines by unveiling the $2500 Nano and buying a couple venerable British marques off Ford. Unfortunately, it's unclear exactly which Indian firm would partner with Gorkovsky Avtomobilny Zavod, as while their name may be fun to say, they'd be up against current native truckmaker Mahindra, among others. What we can tell you as an absolute press-release certainty, though, is that

"success of cars launched by all global players in India is driving force behind Russia to think over entering Indian auto market."

Or, as one GAZ senior official evidently said,

"As auto is one of the key areas of the India-Russia Forum on Trade and Investment we are looking at business partnership in future."

Industry implications aside, it's lots of fun to imagine Russian heavy vehicles operating in the nation with the world's largest population of stray cows. Probably even more fun than coming up with silly "In Soviet Russia..." jokes.

Russians Demand Maybach Taxi Cabs, Porsche Cayennes Too

Mark Arnold — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 15:15:00 EDT

What car do you think of when you imagine a Russian taxi cab? A Lada? Maybe a Volga? Well apparently we need to change our perceptions, because these Russian taxis are quite different. These cabs are a Maybach 62 and a Gemballa-tuned Porsche Cayenne. But why would you want to ride around in such a vulgar means of transportation? It's one thing to take ride in a yellow Crown Vic, but a two-tone orange Maybach? Really?

Why not just have your chartered Maybach painted black on black? It all seems like overkill, but maybe that's the whole point. If you're going to drop serious coin on a luxurious ride, you might as well rub it in the face of all those peasants.
[fishki.net via EnglishRussia]

Lada Oka Transformed Into Mini Monster

Mark Arnold — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 14:15:00 EDT

The standard Lada Oka is your typical eastern European econobox; humble transportation that makes a Tata Nano feel macho. But apparently there are some Russians who look at the poor little thing and see the perfect starting point for an all-terrain monster. We have no idea what the thought process was that led up to the creation of such an awesome machine. Given the choice between this and a Jeep or a Hummer, we'd take this every time. Check out the gallery below and see what it originally looked like here. [English Russia]

BMW's Massive Russian Billboard Dangles Real Cars

Mark Arnold — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 17:00:00 EDT

BMW has created an absurdly huge billboard complete with what appears to be real cars stuck on the side. Total size of the Moscow-based advertisement is said to be over 65,000 square-feet. With functioning lights on the vehicles it all feels like a strange sideways highway for some sort of new anti-gravity-generating Bimmers.

Specifically advertising BMW's Motorsport models, we really hope that these are just mock-ups, or at least engine-less cars stuck on the wall. If not, we may have to find some Russian correspondents who have access to a giant crane and a shipping crate. Now, if only there were an M5 wagon up there.
[EnglishRussia]

Russian Keyless Entry

Mark Arnold — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:05:00 EDT

People these days are spoiled with car tech, but not this Russian. No. Despite having locked his keys in his car, a problem that wouldn't be a problem if he lived in a country with any number of high-tech innovations such as OnStar, remote fobs and, you know, AAA — he's left with only his wits and ingenuity. While a Lexus driver would call this method of entry "breaking in", this guy probably thinks of it simply as "keyless entry." We salute you, comrade.
[YouTube]

In Russia, Doors Open You!

Mark Arnold — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 12:45:00 EST

Who needs doors? They just get in the way, really. Well, maybe that's what this guy in Russia was thinking. Or maybe he just doesn't even think about it in the first place. We're not sure if we should declare this guy a Hoonin' hero or a deranged doofus. Check out the vid of him cruisin' down the expressway to judge for yourself.

[YouTube]

Pobeda, Baby!

Murilee Martin — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 14:30:00 EST

We think the ideal car for a Russian rockabilly dude would have to be a heavily customized ZIS 112, but the GAZ-M20 Pobeda is way easier to find these days. Lower it a bit, shine up the chrome, and install some aftermarket wheels, and you'll be living in an alternate universe in which the Soviet Union of the 1950s was all about rock-n-roll and hot-rod hoonage.

Pobeda Pursuit!

Murilee Martin — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 15:45:00 EST

A coworker was telling me about her childhood in Russia and her family's Zaporozhets. "Terrible car," she told me. "My grandfather, he had a real car!" Yes, it was a special occasion when the whole family could ditch the ZAZ and climb into Grandpa's spacious GAZ-M20 Pobeda for a holiday road trip. So in honor of the mighty Pobeda, here's some footage of unknown origin showing one getting a little loose on wet pavement.

In Russia, Wagons Maximize Your Day

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 18:00:00 EST

Who needs a Subaru Outback or a Suzuki SX4 when you could have a... well... whatever these are. At least two of them seem to be variations of the Lada/AvtoVAZ 2100 series wagons set up for some serious on-roading (on-roading on Russian roads is equivalent to off-roading anywhere else). These unique wagons all appear to be stylish enough, in the Russian sense, to cruise the strada in St. Petersburg one day and then camp along the pristine shores of Lake Baikal the next.

Clearly, the Russians understand the spirit of Maximum Wagon Day.

[RuAuto.NNM]

Comrades! Glorious Stalinmobile Volga Based On Cayenne Chassis!

Murilee Martin — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 16:15:00 EST

We posted on the Stalinmobile Volga last year, but we didn't have much in the way of details about the car. Now it turns out that the thing is based on a Porsche Cayenne chassis and appears to be an engineering masterpiece, in addition to being a stunningly campy homage to one of the most blood-soaked rulers in world history. The sites are in German and Russian, but we get the gist. Make the jump for an even larger gallery. Thanks to Franzouse for the tip! [CromJuwelen, Copypast.ru, RusAutoDesign.ru]

In Russia, Monster Van Saves YOU!

Mark Arnold — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 15:15:00 EST

It's said that when the going gets tough, the tough get going. Clearly this is the philosophy behind these new ambulances designated for unforgiving rural byways of Russia. Who needs paved roads? Heck, who needs roads at all? And why stop there? By the looks of it, these things could ford a river with ease. So really, you don't even need dry land to drive on. If we happen to be vacationing at our dacha and, while out for a spot of motoring, see one these beasts approaching in our rear-view mirror, we're definitely getting out of the way, no siren or flashing lights needed.

[via English Russia]

In Russia, VAZ Make Cheap Car For YOU!

Mark Arnold — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 09:45:00 EST

With all that land mass and all those people, Russia is expected to be the largest car market in Europe within a few years. And what do the proud people of Russia want? Cheap, honest transportation; a "people's car." Well that's exactly what Russia automaker AvtoVAZ wants to give them. Since most of these consumers are not going to be shopping for the likes of an Audi R8 or a custom SUV, AvtoVAZ (known to us as the maker of Ladas) wants to bring a car to market with a price tag of about $6000. According to AvtoVAZ head Boris Aleshin,

"We need to produce a new very cheap car model costing around $US six- seven thousand but not more than $US 7.3 thousand, and probably there will be several budget models,"

While this seems downright expensive compared to the ~~named by Apple~~ built in India Tata Nano, it should be cheap enough to attract consumers who would otherwise buy a used car and/or non-Russian marque.

[via Russia Today]

In Russia, Public Streets Make Donuts for YOU!

Mark Arnold — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 09:45:00 EST

You have to respect a guy who owns an expensive high-performance car and isn't afraid to drive on salty winter roads. Locking your supercar in the garage for the winter just because you don't want it to get dirty deprives you of enjoying the most fun driving conditions of the whole year. There's snowy roads, icy roads, and then theres wet-'n-salty roads! Ok, so your typical Beverly Hills supercar owner wouldn't dream of ever driving in anything worse than partly cloudy conditions. But in Mother Russia, who cares?! Go ahead and drive your Audi R8 in the winter! It's got Quattro, use it! Abuse it! Can't find an empty parking lot to hoon around in? Do donuts in the middle of a public street! Oncoming traffic? In Russia, traffic stops for YOU!

Regard for public safety is on notice.
[YouTube]

Peugeot to Build 300M€ Russian Plant

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 12:45:00 EST

Building plants in Russia is beginning to be a hot new trend for European automakers. As well it should— Russia is one of the most rapidly expanding markets outside of India and China in the world right now. Peugeot Citroen PSA has announced it's plans to lay down a brand new green field plant in Kaluga. The facility will be capable of spitting out 150,000 cars a year. Furthermore, Peugeot is open to partnering with other automakers to maximize output, with Mitsubishi looking like an early candidate. From the report in the Financial Times, it's looking like Kaluga is turning into the Ruskie version of Detroit. Volkswagen is building a plant, as is Volvo heavy truck, in collaboration with shareholder Renault.

Russian Model Killed Protecting Her Porsche Cayenne

Matt Hardigree — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 12:45:00 EST

Sad news from Russia, where a former Russian model and, ironically, head of a security firm was killed while trying to stop a man from hijacking her Porsche Cayenne. Anna Loginova, who was only 29 years old, was going to purchase a kitten in a neighborhood of Moscow when a man grabbed her and threw her from the car. Unwilling to let her car get stolen, Loginva grabbed the door to the Cayenne and was pulled for several feet before letting go of the door. The blow she took when she hit the ground was, unfortunately, fatal.

This wasn't the first time something like this had happened to the young woman. She told Maxim magazine that she had been attacked before and was able to use a Jiu-Jitsu technique to stop the assailant long enough to get her gun. The article says her Cayenne was silver, so no crazy Russian Cayenne jokes. [News From Russia]