An Open Letter to Sports Car “Fans” Rooting Against the Success of…

Stop it. Stop it right now. I mean it. I know you're upset that you don't get to see LMP1s racing in the regional racing series since the merger. I know that the first two races of the inaugural season of TUSCC had issues. I know that P2s haven't had much success against DPs. You've said it. You've said it a thousand… » 4/17/14 1:49pm Thursday 1:49pm

Hey Idiots, Stop Saying Americans Won’t Buy Diesel Manual Wagons

There's this vicious rumor going around that says Americans won't buy diesel wagons, especially ones with manual transmissions. You see it on twitter, on forums and even our own comments. You're all wrong, so shut up. Diesel manual wagons are more popular than you'd think. » 4/14/14 2:20pm Monday 2:20pm

Mitsubishi Doesn't Even Know What They Do Well Anymore

Multiple sources report that Mitsubishi's halo car, the Lancer Evolution, will end production at the end of this year. Eco- is the new prefix du jour, yet Mitsubishi simply hasn't made an eco-friendly car that will sell in North America. It's becoming increasingly obvious that Team Emperor has no clothes. » 4/01/14 10:00am 4/01/14 10:00am

Why Was The Subaru Impreza Voted Best Off-Road Beater?

Jalopnik's March Madness bracket of beaters has reached the Failure Four and a champion of each category has been selected. There were some strong candidates among the off-roaders; Jeep XJ, Ford Ranger... yet you chose to exalt the first-gen Subaru Impreza as the bastion of beater dirt devils. » 3/31/14 7:23pm 3/31/14 7:23pm

'Yummies': Meet The New Worst Marketing Buzzword Ever

Thank god for the world's marketing departments. Without them, who would tirelessly work to ruin the English language? The latest salvo comes from retail analysts at HSBC, who have coined a new term that makes my brain bleed brain-blood: "Yummies." It's only a matter of time before we see it in the car world. » 3/27/14 8:00pm 3/27/14 8:00pm

Fiat-Family Playboy Disses New Renault Twingo As A Copycat

Lapo Elkann is the heir to the Agnelli family that rules Fiat from, I believe, Mt. Olympus, and he seems to live the sort of life you'd expect. He was a factor in the rebirth of the 500, which may be why he's posting stuff that calls out Renault as copycats. Too bad he has no idea what he's talking about. » 3/26/14 7:00pm 3/26/14 7:00pm

Cosmo's Guide To Sex In Cars Actually Ruins Having Sex In Cars

» 3/25/14 12:15pm 3/25/14 12:15pm

Cosmopolitan Magazine is a popular woman's magazine that's known for employing sex columnists who are aliens and only understand human mating behavior through crudely-translated text descriptions sent by space-fax. That's why no one should be shocked at the content of their guide to sex in cars. But you'll be a little … » 3/25/14 12:15pm 3/25/14 12:15pm

BMW Should Make A Bigger X5, Call It The X7 And Be Done With It

BMW already makes cars series from 1 through 7. Its X range of crossovers quickly approaching the same coverage, now that there's the X4 compact sports activity coupe and rumor of a smaller X2 coupe. So why haven't they sucked it up and made a large three-row X7 already? » 3/20/14 9:00pm 3/20/14 9:00pm

Stupidity Is Slowly Killing The Sports Car

Merriam-Webster defines a sports car as "a low small usually two-passenger automobile designed for quick response, easy maneuverability, and high speed driving." That seems fairly curt and dry to me. So why is it that so many cars are labeled as sports cars these days when the vast majority of them are really just russet … » 3/16/14 6:55pm 3/16/14 6:55pm

Trucks and Crossovers are Not Just for Morons

Trucks (including crossovers and SUVs) will very likely surpass car sales this year. The "crossover" craze has been going on for about 10 years or so, but if you ask some people on the internet the vast majority of truck and crossover buyers are just "idiots who think they need something they don't." This superiority… » 3/16/14 2:21pm 3/16/14 2:21pm

It's Time For Stupid Plastic Wheel Covers To Die Die Die

When I tried out Ford's new tiny 3-cylinder engine, they'd helpfully packaged it into a car. And that car was a very nice, just-refreshed 2015 Fiesta. Until I saw the wheels. Over the honest, pure steel wheels, Ford had slapped some plastic picnic plates meant to look like alloy wheels or something. Aren't we done with … » 3/14/14 4:40pm 3/14/14 4:40pm

Why Texas World Speedway Must Be Saved

I've heard a lot of pea-brained ideas come out of College Station, Texas, but the thought of bulldozing a historic racetrack that remains in active use almost every weekend of the year in favor of cheap, tacky houses on dinky lots takes the cake. Simply put: that ain't right. » 3/14/14 4:20pm 3/14/14 4:20pm

Mind-Blowingly Terrible Chevy Ad Reminds You Your Dog Will Die

Chevrolet had a contest that invited filmmakers to create ads week for its products. This is one for its mid-size lump of crossover, the Equinox. And it is bad. Really bad. So bad that the only message it manages to get across is that one day, your furry little friend will die, and you'll be there to watch. This is… » 3/06/14 11:45am 3/06/14 11:45am