So while some of you have expressed displeasure with our extensive Bullrun coverage, some of y'all have enjoyed it and some have reacted with indifference, we have to say that our own abbreviated sojurn as a mini Sal Paradise to the distaff Dean Moriartys of Keri Rensing and Jennifer Nicole was an experience we'll never forget as long as we live. You can call the celebrities B-grade. You can laugh at some of the posturing, but at the end of it all, it was an incredible gathering of car guys and gals all blowing across the country together and often helping each other out. And while yes, certain things were overwrought, we had a wonderful time on our two days on the rally. Click through for some of our favorite participants' recollections.

While tickets were a worry for some, others, like the Subaru Forester-mounted Colin Herrick, managed to stealthily cruise past law enforcement, Herrick comments, "I didn't get any tickets! Don't know if that's really something to brag about with the Bullrun crowd, but it certainly makes things easier for me!" Especially considering Herrick's an emergency worker and excess baggage on his license could mess with his ability to do his job. On the other end of the scale, Noah Lehmann-Haupt in the Ford GT scored a plethora, commenting, "If you count the CHP combined "speeding + improper lane change" as a twofer, then 5," while his co-driver Rob Ferretti racked up exactly zero. Meanwhile, Jennifer Nicole made a game of it, shooting photos of every cop that pulled them over.

Fast cars make for hot action, no? According to a veteran rallying friend of ours, that's not always the case. He commented, "Guys like you and me would have more luck with women in a regular bar on a Wednesday night than on a rally. There's a lot less sex than everyone would think." Nevertheless, the Rensings managed to sneak in a couple of rendezvous, while Annabelle Frankl saved it up for after the rally, noting that she made the beast with two backs "Only once we got back to LA. However, it was someone on Bullrun..." Rory Camangian had to wait until he returned to his wife in New Jersey, noting that due to the omnipresence of roommates, he wasn't even able to rub one out. Jennifer Nicole, however, seemed satisfied with the titillation the cars themselves offered: "Keri would crack up because every time I saw a hot car or heard the Ford GT's extremely loud exhaust, I'd get major goosebumps down my legs and my nipples would get hard. The funniest thing about that was in Vegas: one of the guys on the run put his hand on my leg (I won't mention his name) and mentioned how nice my legs were and I turned to him and said 'If it wasn't for you and your fucking hot car they'd be a lot smoother!" and he just laughed. I think he got the picture...later.'" Jason Garber, who is now known to us as the Dutch Hercules for his amazing performance in the Team Darkcyd Support Navigator, was more succinct, merely answering, "Yes."

So while a number of us were busy not getting laid, we focused on the cars. We were in love with the Feretti/Lehmann-Haupt Ford GT, which sported an aftermarket Ford Racing exhaust system that gave the car the vibe of a knife-shaped Norse hammer. Or a gun-shaped knife. Or something. Whatever it was, it was godly. Obviously, Jen concurs, but what else were people into? Chuck Mallett was so impressed with Claus Ettenberger's Brabus CLS that he's vowed to enter a four-door of his own next year. While Lehmann-Haupt admits to going faster than Mallett and co-driver Danny Coyle, he counts Tove Christensen's Porsche as his favorite car, "Because seeing it meant we were finishing second." Herrick, on the other hand, was a little more indecisive, naming the Ward/Haller Stude as his personal fave and then coming up with a couple of alternates: "Of all the cars that finished I'd have to say the Lotus 340R was pretty damn cool. The Mosler was stunning, but at 147F inside the car, I'd pass out. They literally fried an egg on the dash board." Garber nominated Mallett's diff-fluid-boiling 'Vette, while Haller and Emil Rensing seconded Herrick's props to the all-open-all-the-time 340R.

As we've previously noted, nobody needs to drop 14 large on top of the price of a car and enough petroleum products to get the job done to haul ass across North America. So what does one get for one's money? According to a Bullrunner who wished to remain anonymous, "The food and drink situation on the rally was disappointing. There were way too many cash bars and not nearly enough good meals to justify the expense. Sure, the Bullrun was worth it as an experience, but it was certainly not something that I can call a 'value' as I try to convince more of my friends to participate next year." We personally found the breakfast at Shelby's facility to be especially bad, although the final meal at Social was good, and the breakfast spread at the W in San Diego featured really rather good eggs. The King Taco experience at California Speedway was generally universally reviled, leading Annabelle Frankl to comment, "If you're going to hire something mobile get a fucking In-N-Out Burger van!"

As for accomodations, Gansevoort in New York and the Sonnenalp in Vail, CO tended to be the two favorites, with Haller noting that the anticipation of the impending rally added a special air to the pre-race night in NYC, while Camagian had fond, Teutonic memories of the hotel in Vail: "It made me feel like I was in Germany, even more so after speaking with Peter Kolb for an hour."

Ah yes, Peter Kolb. The hyperserious, r-Deutschman who campaigned a Porsche GT3RS under the aegis of Robb Rill's Team Darkcyd. Peter is a serious believer in the power of German Precision, and given Tove Christensen's turbocharged "Always First First Place," we can't not lend the man's opinion some credence. So what, then, can we learn from Peter Kolb? Camangian: "I learned that anything that comes from Germany is better engineered than anything from other countries — including beer, pretzels, mountains (The Alps), weiner schitzel, and of course, PORSCHE!" Haller: "I like the Brabus. I think I buy a Brabus." The Dutch Hercules was cryptic, commenting only that, "There is no easy way to devirginate an asshole." Meanwhile, Keri was more forthright, praising Herr Kolb: "[I learned that] some Bullrunners have manners — example: they will stop and check if you're okay when you are pulled over on the side of the road for no reason, even though the other 15 cars in their pack did not." But we'll give Emil the final word on Mister Soul Patch: "Porsche may make the most precise of fine German automobiles, but if you drive like Peter, you won't win the Bullrun."

And that, friends, is it for this year's Bullrun coverage. As Kerouac wrote, "Nobody knows what's going to happen to anybody besides the forlorn rags of growing old." Here, then is a toast to bombing across the country while you still can. We're shutting up. Y'all can exhale now.

More on the Bullrun [Internal]

Skiny maneuvers the A6 Avant into proper takeoff position in San Diego.

Generally, when you wake up in the morning at a deluxo hotel in beautiful downtown San Diego and find out that your next destination is in the 909, your first inclination is to break out in hives, go into a seizure, mess yourself, and then put on a straight-brimmed baseball cap, take a hit off the glass dick, climb into a lifted Avalanche, get a slew of tribal tats and crank up any and every Fred Durst-related project you can get your hands on.

Dave Green (left) used to be pretty. Somehow we doubt Richard Rawlings ever was.

Instead, we had eggs that were quite good, drank a fair amount of coffee, and sat down at a table with a group of people, all of whom, except for Jennifer Nicole, had varying models of Motorola RAZRs. Ours was even admired for being "old school," despite the fact that we only bought it last fall. Emil's was gold, Keri's was pink, and Claus had one in some crazy dark finish we'd never seen before which is probably only available to owners of Brabus-tuned cars.

But much in the manner of ninjas during one or another of those Shogunates they had in Japan back in the time, we and our RAZRs would all soon be hurtling toward California Speedway in Fontana. Little did we know, but those of us in the black Audi A8L would also be headed toward our finest hour on the 2006 Bullrun.

The intersection was a madhouse. Danny Coyle was pulling mad donuts and block-long burnouts in the Mallett Corvette. Jen couldn't figure out which way to point the Audi until Emil pointed out to her that she'd be driving out over a curb. Skiny and Bret were about to enter a world of hurt and emerge unscathed, but with their time shattered. Emil was shooting back and forth like a shuttlecock. And Claus? Well, Claus kicked back with his feet up on the open door of his Brabus and made use of his RAZR. Peter Kolb was undoubtedly being more German than anyone else. In fact, we're starting to wonder if he'd actually shrunken the state of Bavaria down to pocket-size when nobody was looking and was carrying it in his pants, simply for added precision. A little extra Weissach never hurt anyone, after all. Except for James Dean.

And then, suddenly, we were off. And miraculously, we were really off. After blowing past Los Matadors on the 163, we didn't see anyone until we got onto the 15, blasting past Skiny and Haller in their A6 Avant. And then the crackle started on the radio. The heavy hitters were quickly moving up behind us. Tove Christensen. the Lehman-Haupt/Ferretti GT with Noah at the wheel. The Team Chris 911. And of course, Danny Coyle wheeling the Chuck Mallett 'Vette.

They blasted past us, with Danny the first to arrive, but not without Jen getting a crack in to Danny over the CB about how it felt to be behind a girl. More chatter, including some worrying news from the well-tuned scanners in the GT regarding Chippies searching for Bullrunners. And sure enough, not long after, the news came over the radio that Team Chris and the GT boys had been snagged. We attempted to get a shot as we drove by, but our imprecise Japanese camera did not allow us such a luxury. We knew we should've bought a Leica. Peter Kolb is no doubt laughing at us as we write this.

Then we flew past Chuck Mallett on the side of the road, refuelling the 'Vette, which only had a 66-mile range. Keri commented, "Watch, in five minutes, he'll come flying past us." Guess what? He did, doing well over a buck on the hard shoulder. Keri put out an APB to all Bullrunners within range, pointing out that in California, the hard shoulders are often filled with tire-and-air-dam-destroying detrius and that we all should be careful.

Meanwhile, just a few miles before we hit I-10, we got stuck in massive traffic. We're not quite sure how we got past Tove, but with the traffic locked in and the GT boys and Team Chris stuck behind us due to their run-in with law enforcement, we knew we had a real shot. Especially if Chuck and Danny ran out of gas again.

On the 10, we made good time, and on the offramp to the Speedway, Jen made use of her looks and got us up in the line. We drove carefully, as the fuzz tend to hang out around the entrance to the speedway, and then hauled ass to the staging area, where we pulled up third behind the Magnaflow RS4 and the Mallett Corvette. The RS4 guys had voluntarily disqualified themselves because they'd left 20 minutes earlier, due to the co-driver not feeling well, putting the nearly bone-stock A8L in behind the 900hp Corvette.

Which just goes to show that on the Bullrun, horsepower is far from everything.

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More on the Bullrun [Internal]

On an absolutely sweltering, uncharacteristically humid Nevada morning, after a blast to the Las Vegas Motor Speedway with Noah Lehman-Haupt in the SuperSpeeders/Gotham Dream Cars Ford GT, we hopped in the back seat of the Rensing/Nicole Audi A8L, did a quick lap of the Shelby proving ground, and shot off for lunch in Lake Havasu. Click through for the tale.

As one of the first cars to leave the speedway, we knew it would only be a matter of time until characters like Lehman-Haupt/Ferretti, Tove Christensen, the Collins Brothers and Peter "I drive Porsche" Kolb would come hammering past us on I-15. We kept in radio contact with Noah, whose Garmin GPS had rendered the team nearly unstoppable on the eastern half of the rally. It had failed us plotting the route to the Speedway, however, and it was about to fail us again.

Noah had decided he and Rob were going to take 93 over to I-40 at Kingman, AZ. Which, of course, took us right over the Hoover Dam. Now, we've wanted to see the Hoover Dam since we were a wee Jalopnik, but today wasn't the right time to be sightseeing and moving slowly. But, slowly we were moving, so we made the best of it and took in the sights. We'd thought about counselling Keri and Jen against the route, but seeing as we'd met Keri roughly five minutes before we got in her car and Jen when we got in the car, we figured that it'd be prudent to let it lie.

We did have a piece of advice from Alex Roy to share, however; proceed slowly through Kingman, as it's a hornets' nest of speedtraps. The best part was when Lehman-Haupt got addled and radioed us later saying, "We're coming into Kingman. We've heard that Alex Roy says there are a lot of speed traps here." Thanks again, Noah.

We caught AZ 95 down to Lake Havasu City, and then something ridiculous happened. Lake Havasu's most famous attraction is London Bridge, which was disassembled in the late 1960s and put back together in Havasu, opening in '71. Yet off the city's main artery, there are no directions to the Bridge, which we were supposed to cross to find the checkpoint. Find it we did, with help from a local girl in a Jeep. Every Bullrunner without prior experience in the town had the same problem. In fact, many said that this checkpoint was the biggest goatfuck of the entire rally.

While we were refuelling, Jen stopped to talk to some folks who wanted to know know if we were making a movie or something, prompting a frustrated discussion between us and Keri, who finally hopped out of the car and yelled, "JEN!"

More on the Bullrun [Internal]