Jalopnik: offbeat humor

You Ever Notice How Peugeot Drivers Drive Like This, And Renault Drivers Drive Like That?

Matt Hardigree — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 10:20:00 EDT

It's tough for Kenan Thompson. He doesn't look like any active politicians, his only recurring sketch on SNL was cut and he ends up getting parts later into the show after most people have already gone to sleep or given up. That's why we were glad to see Keenan get this "Weekend Update" moment as a black comedian who has been living in France and, therefore, has a frame of reference for his humor that's purely European. We won't give away the punch-line but... jokes about European cars. And go. [Source: NBC]

Chrysler Builds Buzz For Challenger In Memphis Airport

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 05 Mar 2008 17:02:00 EST

After spending a billion (or three) dollars on market research, the elite Chrysler media team achieved a coup de grâce in the Muscle Car Wars by getting the new Challenger SRT8 positioned on the front partition of the southernmost magazine rack at Memphis International Airport's "LiterAIRy" bookstore/Elvis memorabilia depository. It was the greatest achievement for the automaker since securing the covers of every automotive magazine and Salt Water Fishing Weekly for the Plymouth Breeze. Said Chrysler media executive Ed Gersten, "So goes the Memphis airport, so goes America."

Surveys show that people's beliefs are directly linked to the composition of magazines in airports, which explains the popularity of Mitt Romney and girls dressing like whores. Carthage, Tennessee homemaker Betty-Sue Hambone was brimming with excitement as she looked at the rack saying "Orange, orange, look at all that orange. I must have one. What is it? Oh look, Katherine Heigl in a blue dress." Based on this phenomenon, Chrysler plans to take orders for 500,000 Challengers in the next month. [Source: TheFirehouse.biz]

I Know Why The Caged Jetta Sings

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 15:15:00 EST

Owning a car in China is sometimes unnecessarily difficult. Take Mr. Zhang, of Jilin city, who has repeatedly been the victim of partnapping. He'd wake up, try to start his car, and then find a note under the windshield wiper demanding a ransom of about $70 to get his car's engine management system back. Police suggested he refuse to pay and contact the the authorities. Instead, he decided on the typically Chinese response of just locking up the problem.

We suspect the Jetta will be used to make soccer balls any day now...

[Ananova via Spluch]

Pontiac Firebird Gets Destroyed By Women For Amusement Of Ze Germans

Matt Hardigree — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 14:45:00 EST

That German humor is sometimes hard to grasp. A lot of people, for instance, don't know that most Germans consider Werner Herzog's Grizzly Man to be a farce in the spirit of Plautus. That my help explain what's going on in this video for Motorraver magazine. In Germany, angry music plus a 1991 Firebird plus sledgehammer wielding fraulines plus fire = amusement. Someone better move that abandoned Camaro, stat. (thanks to Franzouse)

V8 Ford Falcon Supercar Tuned To Play Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda With Me

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 10:20:00 EST

The folks at JELD-WEN Motorsports have had a little extra time on the their hands this off season and have used that to make some interesting engine management adjustments. In addition to raking up wins in the Australian V8 Supercar series, this Falcon manages to play a simple version of the Australian folk tune. More proof that we need the 2008 Ford FG Falcons here in America. Did you hear that Mark Fields? Won't you let the Falcon go Waltzing Matilda with us? [V8SC via World Car Fans]