that's funny because when i lived in south west new hampshire, there were an awful lot of lesbians who exclusively drove xterras and the pickup version
@prndl: The Nissan Xterra is so manly, that even when partially demolished, sorority girls will still fall all over themselves to have one of the Xterra's famous beardstache rides.
If cars had facial hair, forget 5 o'clock shadow-- The Xterra has a full-blown manbeard.
For the international man of Mystery who already follows the jet-set lifestyle.
To go with your Phillipe-Patek watch, Gucci loafers and Armani slacks. Slick your $200 ponytail back and feel the soft leather on this baby.
Watch the immediate attention of the hot blondes on the sidewalk. The admiring glances from coffee-house patrons. The knowing smile on your bosses face.
You can park in front of the restaurant, by the doors. The valet will treat it with the respect he wold his own father. This is a car for the connoisseur, the man about town who needs the best. Without rival.
A car to quicken the pulse.
But do not apply if you're a wannabe. If it's all a pose. This car is the real deal. Not for dreamers. You've earnt it, you deserve it. You've arrived.
For the man who already has two white leisure suits and a discoball in the living room.
Yes, you are the embodiment of all things disco-- you're Disco Stu, and your name emblazoned on the back of your jacket in rhinestones lets everyone know who you are, and gives the ladies fair warning, Disco Stu is on the prowl.
And Disco Stu needs a car to match his mojo.
That's right, a car for comfort.
A car for quality.
A car thats limited numbers make it more exclusive than the Roxbury.
You need a car with style to rival your own. A car that says you've really arrived when you hand the Valet your keys.
You need the DATSUN 280ZX BLACK GOLD.
Black Gold. Only a lucky few will possess its limited numbers, and Disco Stu will be one of them.
This is just how Napoleon Dynamite's uncle would sell his car,poor fella is over compensating for something. I bet he has the biggest martial arts movie collection on VHS,just because DVD's are too girly.
Maybe I need to do something like this. The Saturn still hasn't sold and now I have three cars. But you try to write creative copy for a 4-banger slushbox appliance. It's impossible.
@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: I think there's a guy around here somewhere that can take care of that for you... though the tale he spins may scare off prospective Saturn buyers.
Just an idea for starters - don't refer to it as "a 4-banger slushbox appliance" from now on. Wait.. on second thoguht, a Saturn buyer might like that description.
@pauljones: 03 L-series (L200). One big problem is that Carmax and the like are listing them for $9k-$10k, but KBB says something like $6k for private party. Big chasm. Besides that, nobody is spending money right now and gas prices are back down...
Ah. I have an SL2, and I was considering buying a parts car for it on the cheap. They are simple enough cars to work on, but that doesn't help if you don't have the parts to do it. The L-Series, though, is the big brother to my SL2, and doesn't share too much in commonality. Bummer. Otherwise, I would have considered it.
@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: "The Saturn's soft plastic body panels bounce back after an impact, which means they'll absorb a roundhouse kick without denting (unless the kick is delivered by Chuck Norris-- but if you've pissed off Chuck Norris, you'd better just lay down and die) and allow the driver to run over terrorists without hurting the car's front clip. Some think the automatic transmission is for lazy drivers, but in reality being able to drive with one foot can save your life if you've gotten hurt during a fight with a grizzly bear and had to amputate one of your legs with a toenail clipper. The automatic is also useful if you have to shoot at communists while driving, but be careful, as the glovebox won't hold plastic Glocks. In fact, the glovebox won't accept anything less manly than a Colt 1911, and it prefers the model 1873 Single Action Army revolver. In short, this plastic-bodied car is totally metal."
@pauljones: probably wouldn't have worked for you, anyway...this one's a pretty pristine, low-mileage example. We're looking for at least $8k on it (probably not in the parts-car price range)
@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: I sold my brother's wrecked 54,000 mile SC2 for 1700 after he crashed it. I went to pick your part, got a replacement radiator, hood and bumper (and bumper insert) and I sold it in four days with broken AC on craigslist...
Include a LOT of pictures with proper HTML tags and you'll sell it. Oh, and don't type in ALL CAPS BECAUSE PEOPLE HATE THAT
@Armand Bengle: That is awesome prose, thanks. I may have to crib some of that (especially the plastic/metal line at the end...gold!). This time, I probably need to list the ad WITHOUT my wife's approval. See, it was her car until recently, so she was technically in charge.
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No, sir. No Hammer Pants necessary. No panty-soaking, pussy-magnet yellow Nissan Xterra necessary, either.
REAL macho men drive these:
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Some aren't, though. Yow. Seems like a bit of a waste.
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The Nissan Xterra isn't afraid of the Rubicon trail. The Rubicon trail is afraid of the Nissan Xterra.
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If cars had facial hair, forget 5 o'clock shadow-- The Xterra has a full-blown manbeard.
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Is Graverobber selling an Xterra?
12/02/08
To go with your Phillipe-Patek watch, Gucci loafers and Armani slacks. Slick your $200 ponytail back and feel the soft leather on this baby.
Watch the immediate attention of the hot blondes on the sidewalk. The admiring glances from coffee-house patrons. The knowing smile on your bosses face.
You can park in front of the restaurant, by the doors. The valet will treat it with the respect he wold his own father. This is a car for the connoisseur, the man about town who needs the best. Without rival.
A car to quicken the pulse.
But do not apply if you're a wannabe. If it's all a pose. This car is the real deal. Not for dreamers. You've earnt it, you deserve it. You've arrived.
Savour the moment.
For sale:- 1988 Chryser LeBaron 2.5 Convertible.
12/02/08
For the man who already has two white leisure suits and a discoball in the living room.
Yes, you are the embodiment of all things disco-- you're Disco Stu, and your name emblazoned on the back of your jacket in rhinestones lets everyone know who you are, and gives the ladies fair warning, Disco Stu is on the prowl.
And Disco Stu needs a car to match his mojo.
That's right, a car for comfort.
A car for quality.
A car thats limited numbers make it more exclusive than the Roxbury.
You need a car with style to rival your own. A car that says you've really arrived when you hand the Valet your keys.
You need the DATSUN 280ZX BLACK GOLD.
Black Gold. Only a lucky few will possess its limited numbers, and Disco Stu will be one of them.
BLACK GOLD!!
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@Slantsick- on layaway at SPATULA CITY: Thanks guys!
I haven't ranked as COTD in ages, but every so often I can elicit a giggle...
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What year is the Saturn?
@seaninc:
It shouldn't be too bad; it's not unheard of for guys to buy the automatics for cheaper and do the transmission swap themselves.
12/02/08
When I was getting rid of my Rover it didn't occur to me to ask for money for it...
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Just an idea for starters - don't refer to it as "a 4-banger slushbox appliance" from now on. Wait.. on second thoguht, a Saturn buyer might like that description.
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Ah. I have an SL2, and I was considering buying a parts car for it on the cheap. They are simple enough cars to work on, but that doesn't help if you don't have the parts to do it. The L-Series, though, is the big brother to my SL2, and doesn't share too much in commonality. Bummer. Otherwise, I would have considered it.
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Also, try putting "GREAT MPG" in the ad.
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Include a LOT of pictures with proper HTML tags and you'll sell it. Oh, and don't type in ALL CAPS BECAUSE PEOPLE HATE THAT
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