Bumbeck: Because you need a super duty heavy hauler possessing nearly unlimited power along with with a degree of factory installed luxury and exterior style. Because you enjoy being able to move around an extremely large pickup truck with ridiculous ease at the touch of the throttle. Because you cannot live without the sound of diesels and turbochargers. Because you and Hoss have some stumps to pull.

Loverman: You are a torque junky. Forget heroin; the worm-drive feeling of unstoppable forward thrust is the greatest drug of them all. You have a large boat/trailer/camper/horse that needs to be moved around. It looks like pure evil, but in a good way. You will never get cut off again. If you like to sit high, man, this truck is a head above. You always wanted to be a bus driver. If you get the eight-foot bed, you can get the 38-gallon tank, which is almost big enough for 900-mile diaper-clad dashes to Florida.

Why You Should Not Buy This Truck:

Loverman: The F250 drives and rides like a paint jogger. It is socially irresponsible, not because of climate change, but because if you hit Bumbeck's Starlet, you're a murderer. Of both Bumbeck and Starlet. The F250 has more capability than you need. Even Ford's PR guy was having a hard time coming up with something besides "a really big boat" that weighs 15,000 lbs. Even with the sorta-from-certain-angles acceptable mileage, it costs $90 to fill the tank. Think of all the other great cars you could get for $50K.

Bumbeck: Because you feel the need to drive around in traffic like David Pearson at the 1969 Daytona 500. Because you want a practical commuter on a budget. Because you want to pretend as if you could tow or haul when you know you never will.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: Yes
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Also Consider:
Dodge Ram Heavy Duty 4500
Chevy TopKick C4500
Mitsubishi Fuso Super Great
A Tug Boat

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Ford
· Model tested: Super Duty F250 4X4 Crew Cab Outlaw
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $51,195
· Engine type: 6.0L Turbocharged V8 Diesel
· Horsepower: 325hp @ 3300 rpm
· Torque: 570 lb-ft @ 2000 rpm
· Redline: 5000 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 20" Forged Aluminum wheels w/ LT255/70R
· Drive type: Four-Wheel Drive w/ Transfer Case
· 0 - 60: 8 seconds
· 1/4 mile: N/A
· Fuel economy city/highway: N/A
Observed fuel economy: 15.6mpg
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: NA

– Jonny Lieberman, Mike Bumbeck

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Ford F250 Outlaw — He Drove He Drove Edition — Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why You Should Buy This Car: Looks matter to you most of all. It's impossible to lose in the mall parking lot. You and three of your adult friends go out to eat a lot, and want to do so in comfort. Armored car side metal makes you feel safe and/or secure. You just love sitting up high. That commercial gets you every time, "Rainbows and seashells and blue skies above — now is the time for love. Look around and what do you see? A beautiful world!" The 20" shiny chrome rims are pretty blingtastic. Oh, we're back to looks, aren't we?

Why You Shouldn't Buy This Car: Travel over the slightest road imperfection and the Nitro tries to kill you. Worst riding car in recent memory. While the backseat is indeed comfy, your rear passengers' shrieks of "JESUS!" as you cross even the mildest expansion joint wears on your nerves. It doesn't go off road, even though underneath the svelte looks, it's a Jeep. Very limited cargo potential. Humdrum, ho-hum, parts bin interior. Very boring to drive straight and hopeless on twisty roads. High center of gravity makes it feel tippy. Horrific to park. Less than 20 mpg. Style, my friends, all over substance. – Jonny Lieberman

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Dodge
· Model tested: Nitro R/T 2WD
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $29,821
· Engine type: 4.0L SOHC V6
· Horsepower: 260 hp @ 6000 rpm
· Torque: 265 lb-ft @ 4200 rpm
· Redline: 6250 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 20" Aluminum wheels w/ 245/50s
· Drive type: rear-wheel drive
· 0 - 60: 7.7 seconds
· 1/4 mile: 15.9 @ 86.3mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 17/21
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: NA

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Dodge Nitro R/T 2WD, Part 1 Part 2

Why You Should Buy This Car: The 2007 Wrangler Rubicon is Jeep, not a Jeep. Like a Zippo or a pair of Levis, the Wrangler is an icon, and Jeep's perfected its looks. Best-in-class off-road performance. Best-in-several-other-classes off-road performance. Detachable front sway bar is the killer app. Much more livable in grocery getting situations than all of its predecessors combined. You love fording streams. You like climbing walls. You feel happy while riding in it.

Why You Shouldn't Buy This Car: You need the four-door Unlimited model. You hate dirt. Your idea of the great outdoors is an Ansel Adams book. Getting in and out, especially on slopes, is tricky and never graceful. The Wrangler bounces around constantly and gets wallet-draining mileage. Keeping up with freeway traffic is work. The top and the doors come off, but where do you put them? Comes standard with a soft-top, but the owner's manual shows a picture of a rubber mallet (?) during the installation process. There isn't room for both buddies and gear. You like the Mars Lander looks of the off-roadgasmic Toyota FJ. You like the short-bus looks and zero capability of the Compass sibling. More than $30,000 for a Jeep Wrangler is steep, especially since you've never even seen an unpaved road.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Jeep
· Model tested: Wrangler Rubicon
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $31,110
· Engine type: 3.8L OHV V6
· Horsepower: 202 hp @ 5200 rpm
· Torque: 237 lb-ft @ 4000 rpm
· Redline: 6000 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 17" Aluminum wheels w/ 32-inch B.F. Goodrich Off-Road tires
· Drive type: four-wheel drive w/ low transfer case
· 0 - 60: 10.2 seconds
· 1/4 mile: 17.4 @ 74mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 16/19
· Observed economy overall: 16.5
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: NA

– Jonny Lieberman

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Jeep Wrangler Rubicon, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why You Should Buy This Car: You're Mormon, have a Napoleon complex or travel with a posse. You subscribe to the belief that it's both about the size of the boat and the motion of the ocean. You crave the most comfortable way to get from A to B, not the quickest; your seven friends and their dogs feel the same way. You want other drivers to change lanes instantly when you pull up behind them. You never want anyone to turn left on yellow in front of you. You dig how the giant chrome wheels create cool blacktop reflections as you roll. You need the 6,000+ lbs. tax dodge. You're homeless.

Why You Shouldn't Buy This Car: Three-ton cars are absurd; I've lived in smaller apartments. Ginormous SUVs are as early 2000s as the word "ginormous." Parking spots were not painted with the EL in mind. The unequal distribution of our planet's resources keeps you up nights. You hate having to shell out $80 at the pump every three days. Regardless of your actual needs, others will wonder why you need something so large. You don't like being laughed at. You will be laughed at.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Ford
· Model tested: Expedition EL 4x4
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $50,150
· Engine type: 5.4L 3-Valve V8
· Horsepower: 300 hp @ 5000 rpm
· Torque: 365 lb-ft @ 3750 rpm
· Redline: 6250 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 20" Aluminum wheels w/ P55/255
· Drive type: four-wheel drive
· 0 - 60: Come on
· 1/4 mile: No, really
· Fuel economy city/highway: From Ford's website, "Due to weight and vehicle classification, Expedition EL versions are not tested in EPA cycle"
· Observed fuel economy: 15.6mpg
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: NA

– Jonny Lieberman

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Ford Expedition EL, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why You Should Buy This Car: Drop-kicking the accelerator is like hitting a crack pipe; the rush is outright mad, instantly exhilarating and altogether unhealthy. A lack of German engineering in a car this powerful is refreshing. The GT500 is as American as Marlboro Reds, 72oz steaks and adult-onset diabetes; wrapping yourself in a flag would be less patriotic. Despite all odds, the Shelby is a blast to drive really fast. The brakes will man up and save your bacon, and then do it again. Tight back seat doubles as a handy dog carrier. The commodious trunk makes it realistic for daily use. It's both fantastically butch-looking and ordinary, which makes it as stealthy as a Q-ship. The price makes it the performance steal of this decade. The hottest MILF in the Valley walked up to me and said, "Nice car." Did I mention that the acceleration is more fun than seven roller coasters?

Why You Shouldn't Buy This Car: You're not sold on last century's technology. Precision in all things is your thing, and you need a little foreplay. Underneath all the snakes, Eaton blower and bluster sits a $17,000 rental car. The ride is just pathetic and the road noise isn't far behind. Its collar is bluer than Larry the Cable Guy's routine; nothing Volvo going on over here. Despite having decent gas mileage (for what it is), the tank is only 15-gallons large; real world range is about 250-miles per fill-up. The massive bulge in the hood makes parking an F-150-ish affair. You're too old.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: Yes
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Ford
· Model tested: Shelby GT500
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $43,250
· Engine type: 5.4L Supercharged V8
· Horsepower: 500 hp @ 6000 rpm
· Torque: 480 lb-ft @ 4500 rpm
· Redline: 6250 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 18" Aluminum wheels w/ P255/45R18 fronts, P285/45R18 rear
· Drive type: rear-wheel drive
· 0 - 60: 4.5 seconds
· 1/4 mile: 12s
· Fuel economy city/highway: 15/21
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: NA

– Jonny Lieberman

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Ford Shelby Cobra GT500, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why You Should Buy This Car:

Loverman: You want a reasonably priced, comfortable ride that is iPod-friendly, decent on gas and way up off the ground. You don't want to ever bend your knees when entering or exiting the vehicle. Your friends describe you as a serious on-roader. You look good in orange.

Austin: You want to buy American and not feel like you're trading down to do so. Or, as the Ford marketing people told us, your name is Phil and you're an active, on-the-go kind of guy who's social and likes to try new things.

Loverman: You know, Ted Bundy fit that description.

Why You Shouldn't Buy This Car:

Austin: You need three rows of seats. You don't own sunglasses dark enough to handle with the excess chrome. And finally, the usual anti-SUV argument: You can get better performance and more space in a station wagon. Then again, you would look like a huge nerd in a wagon.

Loverman: Dude, both Ted Bundy and the Night Stalker drove wagons. Phil would go for the AWD model with the Vistaroof and navigation but realizes $35,000 could get him into an Infiniti G coupe, a Shelby GT, a Dodge Magnum with a Hemi, an Audi A3 or a Subaru WRX Wagon with $10,000 worth of chips, catbacks and sway bars (sit and spin, Davey). Turns out Phil was dating Dave, and a gay man would never be caught dead in an Edge.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: Yes
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: Yes

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Ford
· Model tested: Ford Edge SEL AWD
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $35,000 (estimate)
· Engine type: 3.5L V6
· Horsepower: 265 hp @ 6250 rpm
· Torque: 250lbs. ft. @ 4500
· Redline: 6250 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 18" Polished Aluminum/Wheels wheels w/ Continental All Season tires
· Drive type: AWD
· 0 - 60: n/a
· 1/4 mile: n/a
· Fuel economy city/highway: 17/24
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: n/a

– by Mike Austin and Jonny Lieberman

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Ford Edge, Special He Drove / He Drove Edition, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: You like American cars — big, fast and sloppy at the limit. (If they weren't, what would Euro snobs have to brag about, soccer?) To your mind, dumping the clutch never died, it just faded away. You consider the Shaker 1000 stereo to be what the Infiniti G35's Studio on Wheels by Bose is to audiophiles. You don't mind the cops pulling you over to ask questions about your car.

Why you shouldn't buy this car: You're an Asiaphile who's aware that, for the same money, you can get a faster, better handling and possibly more fuel-efficient EVO/STI. You lament that the gearbox, interior and brakes are all not built Ford tough. You enjoy autocrossing and in-car sex.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: Yes
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Ford
· Model tested: Ford Mustang GT California Special
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $29,985
· Engine type: 4.6L OHV V8
· Horsepower: 300 hp @ 5750 rpm
· Torque: 320lbs. ft. @ 4500
· Redline: 6250 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 18" Polished Aluminum wheels w/ performance tires
· Drive type: rear-wheel drive
· 0 - 60: 5.5 seconds
· 1/4 mile: 14.1seconds
· Fuel economy city/highway: 17/25
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: 4/na/5

– Jonny Lieberman

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Ford Mustang GT California Special, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why You Should Buy This Car: You like sitting up high, but need a semblance of sport from your car. You think "drug-addled catfish" is the new design chic. You're five-and-a-half feet tall and prefer just to step sideways to get in and out. You need to lug a few cases of wine home after the Thursday-night tasting.

Why You Shouldn't Buy This Car: The Subaru WRX Sport Wagon (shut up, Davey). Or for that matter, the Legacy GT Wagon. Or maybe best of all, the Mazdaspeed3.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: Yes
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Also Consider:
Infiniti FX
Subaru Legacy GT Wagon

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Mazda
· Model tested: Mazda CX-7 Grand Touring AWD
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $29,585
· Engine type: 2.3L 16-Valve 4-Cyl Turbo
· Horsepower: 244 hp @ 5000 rpm
· Torque: 258 ft.-lbs. @ 2500 rpm
· Redline: 6750 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 235/60 R18 tires on 10-spoke alloy wheels
· Drive type: All-wheel drive
· 0 - 60: 7.5 seconds
· 1/4 mile: 15.8 seconds
· Fuel economy city/highway: 18/24
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: 5/5/na

– Jonny Lieberman

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Mazda CX-7 Grand Touring AWD, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: Your Chrysler Sebring is getting a little old and you don't want to wait for a new one; you want a convertible but live in the 75% of the country that has some sort of winter.

Why you shouldn't buy this car: You're looking for a more of a sports car and less of a boulevard cruiser; you or your traveling companion pack heavy.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: Yes
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Also Consider:
· Volkwagen Eos
· Chrysler Sebring Convertible
· Mitsubishi Eclipse Spyder

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Pontiac
· Model tested: G6 GTP Convertible
· Model year: 2006
· Base Price: $29,365
· Price as Tested: $31,990
· Engine type: 3.9-liter OHV 12-valve V-6
· Horsepower: 240 hp @ 6000 rpm
· Torque: 240 ft.-lbs. @ 2800 rpm
· Redline: 6400 rpm
· Transmission: 4-speed manumatic
· Curb Weight: 3428 lbs
· LxWxH: 189.0 x 70.6 x 57.0 in
· Wheelbase: 112.3 in
· Tires: P225/50R18 Goodyear Eagle LS-2
· Drive type: front-wheel-drive
· 0 - 60 mph: 8.2 sec.
· 1/4-mile: 16.3 sec. @ 88 mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 18 / 26
· NHTSA crash test rating: front: 5/4 (driver/passenger); side: 3/5 (front/rear); rollover: 5

– Mike Austin

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Pontiac G6 GTP Convertible, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: It's got those cool dent-resistant plastic hydroformed sheetmetal body panels. Really though, the Sky looks boss, especially for a car priced in the mid-20's. It gives us hope for the American auto industry that they can still make fun cars.

Why you shouldn't buy this car: The roof is annoying and trunk is pretty useless, and it should feel sportier. The 0-60 time is decent, but this is a sports car, not a family hauler, so the engine response and handling should be livelier. The 260-hp Sky Redline will fix many of these problems, for a price.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: Yes
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: No
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Also Consider:
· Mazda MX-5 Miata
· Pontiac Solstice
· Porsche Boxster (used)

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Saturn
· Model tested: Sky
· Model year: 2007
· Base Price: $23,115
· Price as Tested: $26,205
· Engine type: 2.4-liter DOHC 16-valve inline four
· Horsepower: 177 hp @ 6600 rpm
· Torque: 166 ft.-lbs. @ 4800 rpm
· Redline: 7000 rpm
· Transmission: 5-speed automatic
· Curb Weight: 2963 lbs
· LxWxH: 161.1 x 71.4 x 50.4 in
· Wheelbase: 95.1 in
· Tires: P245/45R18 Goodyear Eagle RSA
· Drive type: rear-wheel-drive
· 0 - 60 mph: 7.2 sec.
· 1/4-mile: 15.7 sec. @ 89 mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 22 / 26
· NHTSA crash test rating: not tested

[by Mike Austin]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews; 2007 Saturn Sky, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: You're an SUV-driving parent who wants to buy American, but still wants to be different from the 10 other Ford drivers in your subdivision. Or, you're a man who drives a Jeep Liberty, but looking for something slightly less feminine.

Why you shouldn't buy this car: You enjoy driving, but don't tow, drive off-road, or use the third-row seat and you don't want to suffer through 14 mpg in the city.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: Yes
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: Yes

Also Consider:
· Honda Pilot
· Nissan Pathfinder
· Dodge Durango

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Mercury
· Model tested: Mountaineer
· Model year: 2006
· Base Price: $35,500
· Price as Tested: $40,800
· Engine type: 4.6-liter SOHC 24-valve V-8
· Horsepower: 292 hp @ 5750 rpm
· Torque: 300 ft.-lbs. @ 4750 rpm
· Transmission:6-speed automatic
· Curb Weight: 4742 lbs
· LxWxH: 193.5 x 73.5 x 72.8 in
· Wheelbase: 113.7 in
· Tires: P235/65R18 Michelin Cross Terrain SUV
· Drive type: all-wheel-drive
· 0 - 60 mph: 8.0 sec. (est.)
· Fuel economy city/highway: 14 / 20
· NHTSA crash test rating: front: 5/5 (driver/pass.); side: 5/5 (front/back); rollover: 3

[by Mike Austin]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Mercury Mountaineer, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: You'll never be late to a road-luge competition again. You feel others need to know how healthy and tan you are. Awesome rubber-coated cargo area is great for hauling your gear, bro. You can hide mass condoms in the First Aid kit.

Why you shouldn't buy this car: You enjoy driving. Also, the Xterra's funny looking and its gas mileage ain't great. The off-road model comes in 4x2 form? What is this, Baja 1000?

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: Yes
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Nissan
· Model tested: Xterra Off Road
· Model year: 2006
· Base Price: $23,850
· Price as Tested: $29,015
· Engine type: 4.0-liter DOHC 24-valve V6
· Horsepower: 265hp @ 5600 rpm
· Torque: 284 ft.-lbs. @ 4000 rpm
· Transmission: 5-speed automatic
· Wheels and Tires: P265/75R16 BFGoodrich Rugged Trail
· Drive type: Part-time four-wheel drive
· 0 - 60 mph: 7.7 sec.
· Fuel economy city/highway: 16 / 21
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: 4/5/3

[by Jonny Lieberman]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Nissan Xterra, Part 1; Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: The Tahoe looks sharp, drives plush and coddles (five passengers) wonderfully. It ll tow a boat, ford a stream, plug some mud and save GM. Maybe.

Why you shouldn t buy this car: It s not a car. We re talking eleven miles per gallon, real world. Given the plethora of equally capable, more spacious alternatives, that s just plain unconscionable.

Vitals
· Manufacturer: Chevrolet
· Model tested: Tahoe LT
· Model year: 2007
· Price as Tested: $39,990
· Engine type: 5.8-liter V8 iron block
· Horsepower: 320 bhp @ 5300 rpm
· Torque: 340 lb-ft @ 4200 rpm
· Redline: 5500 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: 8.5 x 20 in/cast aluminum wheels, Bridgestone Dueler H/L Alenza M+S, P275/55R-20 111S
· Drive type: 4WD: part-time two-speed with automatic front-axle engagement, automatically locking center differential, open front differential, and automatically locking rear differential
· 0 - 60: 8.5 secs.
· 1/4 mile: 16.5 sec @ 84 mph
· Top speed: 112mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 18 / 22
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: 4/4/3

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: Yes
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

[by Robert Farago]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2007 Chevrolet Tahoe, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: V-8 boeuf, solid handling, decent hauling capacity. If you're a family of four or less with at least one enthusiast driver in the mix, the Magnum should definitely be on your list of potential buys.

Why you shouldn t buy this car: A minivan, an SUV or a luxury car it isn't. For the same money there are smaller cars that get better mileage, vehicles that can carry more that get better mileage, or more luxurious cars that get better mileage. But there's no direct competitor to the Magnum. You know if you want it; if you're not sure, you probably don't.

Suitability Parameters
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: Yes
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: Yes
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: Yes

Vitals
· Manufacturer: Dodge
· Model tested: R/T
· Model year: 2006
· Price as Tested: $34,095
· Engine type: 5.7 litre Hemi V8
· Horsepower: 345hp
· Torque: 375 ft.-lbs.
· Wheels and Tires: P225 / 60 R18 Touring
· Drive type: rear-wheel-drive
· 0 - 60: 6.1 secs
· 1/4 mile: 14.7 secs. @ 97 mph
· Top speed: 143 mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 17/25
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: 4/4/10%

[by Davey G. Johnson]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Dodge Magnum R/T, Part 1, Part 2 [Internal]

Why you should buy this car: Because you re not a getaway driver, but you d sure as Hell like to be.

Why you shouldn t buy this car: Once you get on the 911 ownership express, you can t get off. Don t get me wrong: sexually, you re still good. I mean there s nothing else on four-wheels worth buying — except more expensive variants: C4S, Turbo, Turbo S. And then they re-engineer the model and it starts all over again. The C4 may not be dangerous, but it s a dangerous addiction.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: Yes
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: Yes
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Porsche
· Model tested: 911 C4 (997)
· Model year: 2006
· Price as Tested: $77,100
· Engine type: 3.6-liter DOHC 24-valve flat-6
· Horsepower: 325 hp @ 6100rpm
· Torque: 273 ft.-lbs. @ 2750 rpm
· Redline: NA
· Wheels and Tires: Pirelli 295/35ZR-18
· Drive type: all-wheel-drive
· 0 - 60: 5.2 secs.
· 1/4 mile: 12.9 secs
· Top speed: 174 mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 13/27
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: Not tested

[by Robert Farago]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Porsche Carrera 4, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: The MX-5 is the bonsai tree of sports cars: a perfectly formed thrashmobile writ small. All the roadster s major controls work with infinite precision and perfect linearity. There s so much intimate feedback through the wheel, pedals and seat that the Moroni Monroney [window sticker] should include a XXX rating. For people who drive for driving s sake, it doesn t get much better than this — at any price.

Why you shouldn t buy this car: If you have a history of run-ins with solid objects, or bad luck, we suggest something a bit larger and more robust.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: Yes
· Treehuggers: Yes
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: Yes
· Hairdressers: Yes
· Penny Pinchers: Yes
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: Yes
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: Yes

Vitals
· Manufacturer: Mazda
· Model tested: MX5
· Model year: 2006
· Price as Tested: $27,330
· Engine type: 2.0-liter in-line four
· Horsepower: 170 hp @ 6700 rpm
· Torque: 140 lb-ft @ 5000 rpm
· Redline: 6750 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: Michelin Pilot Preceda, 205/45R-17 84W
· Drive type: rear wheel drive
· 0 - 60: 6.5 secs.
· 1/4 mile: 15.0 sec @ 91 mph
· Top speed: 131 mph
· Fuel economy city/highway: 25/30
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: Not yet rated

[by Robert Farago]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Mazda MX-5, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you should buy this car: The new Ford Explorer is a highly evolved SUV; a convincing blend of truck and luxury car for owners who drive both ways. The Explorer can still tow a boat, plug mud and dance through the drifts, but it s ratcheted-up the suburb-friendly people mover shtick considerably (all hail the stiffer chassis, six-speed slushbox and adult-sized third row). Badge snobs will prefer something — anything — else, but a new hi-spec Explorer is all the SUV most people need, at a price they can afford. If you don t mind enriching the Petro Shop Boys, the Explorer is currently the segment s most sensible choice.

Why you shouldn t buy this car: Pump shock. Although gas prices will likely fall back to less wallet-draining levels, the Explorer still sucks down the go-juice like there s no day after tomorrow. We reckon a die-hard Massachusetts driver could see mileage figures in the, gulp, single digits. And then there s the Explorer s image. It doesn t have one. Unless you drop some serious paper at the blingmeisters Candy Shop, you will be invisible. Oh, and the tunes are dire.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: No
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: Yes
· Tuner Crowd: No
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: Yes
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: Yes
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Ford
· Model tested: Explorer Eddie Bauer
· Model year: 2006
· Price as Tested: $34,845
· Engine type: 4.6-liter SOHC V8, with 3 valves per cylinder, variable camshaft timing
· Horsepower: 292 hp @ 5,750 rpm
· Torque: 300 ft.-lbs. @ 3,950 rpm
· Redline: 6,250 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: P235/65R18 A/S OWL tires/ 18 x 7.5 in. chromed wheels
· Drive type: four-wheel-drive
· 0 - 60: TBA
· 1/4 mile: TBA
· Top speed: TBA
· Fuel economy city/highway: 14/21
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: TBT

[by Robert Farago]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Ford Explorer Eddie Bauer, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]

Why you shouldn t buy this car: Chevy s new Vette is still plastic craptastic, and the Vette s image remains resolutely down-market. Amongst the sports car fraternity, the model still identifies its driver as a muscle head who doesn t know any better, or a middle-aged man who desperately wants to shag a woman younger than his first wife.

Why you should buy this car: Buy a new Vette if you want to drive like a maniac (on smooth, dry pavement) and enjoy every damn second of it.

Suitability Parameters:
Speed Merchants: Yes
Fashion Victims: Yes
Treehuggers: No
Mack Daddies: No
Tuner Crowd: Yes
Hairdressers: Yes
Penny Pinchers: Yes
Euro Snobs: No
Working Stiffs: Yes
Technogeeks: No
Poseurs: Yes
Soccer Moms: No
Nascar Dads: Yes
Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
Manufacturer: Chevrolet
Model tested: C6 (hardtop and convertible)
Model year: 2005
Price as Tested: approx. $60k
Engine type: 6.0-liter V-8, aluminum block and heads
Horsepower: 400 bhp @ 6000 rpm
Torque: 400 lb-ft @ 4400 rpm
Redline: 6500rpm
Wheels and Tires: Cast aluminum; Goodyear Eagle F1 SC; F: P245/40ZR-18, R: P285/35ZR-19
Drive type: rear-wheel-drive
0 - 60: 4.2 seconds
1/4 mile: 12.7 sec @ 113 mph
Top speed: 185mph
Fuel economy city/highway: 18/25
NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: not tested

[by Robert Farago]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2005 Chevrolet Corvette C6, Part 1; Part 2

Why you shouldn t buy this car: The anti-four-door brigade has a point: the Charger R/T lacks charisma. While the Hemi lets rip in fine fashion, and The Dodge Boys have pumped-up the interior volume to proper Yank Tank proportions, there s really nothing to get all that excited about. A muscle car needs drama, flair and excitement. The Charger R/T is simply too sensible for its own good. Both the interior and exterior lack the kind of killer app that lifts a bread-and-butter sedan onto that next level, where you re completely convinced that your kid schlepper is too cool for school.

Why you should buy this car: The engine.

Chrysler s 5.7-liter Hemi is a pistonheads dream come true: a smooth cruising, bad-ass blasting peach of a powerplant, offering massive bang for very little bucks. The outer wrapper (i.e. the car) lacks the ripped physique muscle car fanatics adore, but the Charger s ergonomics will increase the average driver s appreciation for the sedan s engineering and value as the miles blow by. The Charger R/T is practical, comfortable, reliable, affordable and, in a straight line, fun.

Suitability Parameters:
· Speed Merchants: Yes
· Fashion Victims: No
· Treehuggers: No
· Mack Daddies: No
· Tuner Crowd: Yes
· Hairdressers: No
· Penny Pinchers: No
· Euro Snobs: No
· Working Stiffs: No
· Technogeeks: No
· Poseurs: No
· Soccer Moms: No
· Nascar Dads: Yes
· Golfing Grandparents: No

Vitals:
· Manufacturer: Dodge
· Model tested: Dodge Charger R/T
· Model year: 2006
· Price as Tested: $29,995
· Engine type: 5.7-liter Hemi V8, cast iron block, 16-vavles
· Horsepower: 340 hp @ 5000 rpm
· Torque: 390 ft. lbs. @ 4000 rpm
· Redline: 5800 rpm
· Wheels and Tires: Continental P225/60R118H 99H All Season Touring
· Drive type: RWD
· 0 - 60: 6.0 secs.
· 1/4 mile: 13.9 secs.
· Top speed: 130 mph (limited)
· Fuel economy city/highway: 17/25
· NHTSA crash test rating front/side/rollover: 5/5/4

[by Robert Farago]

Related:
Jalopnik Reviews: 2006 Dodge Charger R/T, Part 1, Part 2 [internal]