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Detroit, 11:32 AM
Tue Dec 1
28 posts in the last 24 hours
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12/09/08
Within 18 months, every car would have a five-valve engine that revs to 20 grand.
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My personal pick, however, would be Bill Murray. He could tap Chrysler on the shoulder, hand them $10 Billion dollars, and walk away with $2 Billion for his trouble because no one would ever believe they didn't lose that money, too.
No, Bill, THANK YOU.
12/09/08
12/08/08
Pro: Corinthian leather
Con: Want's Tattoo to run Jeep
12/08/08
Step 1: Don't f**k with the Wrangler
Step 2: Don't badge whore a compact
Step 3: There is no step 3
12/08/08
So I would accept the Martin Wert Polar Graverobber slate + the Stig to keep everyone focused.
That should do it.
12/08/08
Долгосрочной службы Царь!!
12/08/08
Barney's got nothin' on the gunny!
"Private Mulally, whatever you do don't fall down. That would beak my fucking heart! … Are you quitting on me? Well, are you? Then quit, you slimy fucking walrus-looking piece of shit! Get the fuck off of my obstacle! Get the fuck down off of my obstacle! Now! Move it! I'm going to rip your balls off so you cannot contaminate the rest of the world! I will motivate you, Private Mulally, if it short-dicks every cannibal on the congo!"
12/08/08
12/08/08
Terry Tate, Office Linebacker
PROS
-Serious Office Experience, 45% increase in productivity
-Does not accept Bullshit (I'm lookin' at you Red Ink Rick)
-Kicks people's ass
-Obama will totally go for him.
-Can assist with streamlining and layoffs
-Gives out the pain
Cons
-Health Insurance at the Medium 2.15 may go up
-Terry Tate don't accept no muchers, retirees may be killed(Then again that could be a positive)
-Not much experience in the car industry (He's an outsider)
"Cu'z when its game time, it's pain time!"
12/08/08
Look, just cuz Triple T is a century old (In interweb years), he'll still bring the pain to D-Town. Cuz you can't stop the pain train! Woo-Woo!
12/08/08
As much as I hate to say this...
I nominate Mr Cut and SLASH himself..
Carlos GHOSN!
A least he can find a way to make the companies vehicles look appealing.. That and in the end Nissan and Chevy would probably be one.
Then again.. not so much a good idea. Altima spanks the Malibu with its own tail!
12/08/08
12/08/08
Pros:
- Could bail out all three US automakers by himself
- Certifiable car nut (owns and drives a 959, threatened to move if a law making it illegal to drive was passed in Washington State)
- Strong business history
- Experience working with Auto Manufacturers
- First hand experience with US and international anti-trust laws
- Currently "between jobs"
Cons:
- The Apple fanboys / Jobs Worshipers will bitch and moan and generally be annoying
- Would likely give the US automakers a "nerdy" image
- Is viewed as the poster boy for modern monopolistic business practices
- Does not tolerate fools, so clashes with Congress would be inevitable
12/08/08
- Would make ipod/car connections illegal. (pro or con, you decide.)
12/08/08
- could mandate Zune connectors.
I vote "con" for that one
12/08/08
Besides, the Zune really isn't bad, it just isn't "cool"... it's the Volvo station wagon of MP3 players, and as such it should be embraced and loved by Los Jalops... you know who has an iPod? Paris Hilton has an iPod, Britney Spears has an iPod, SLR Guy has an iPod... do you want to be associated with "those" people? (okay, I don't actually know any of them have iPods but I'd be willing to bet).
Me? I'm a cheap bastard with a Sansa running RockBox.
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Is an explanation necessary?
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Wait...
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