We've got babes eating flowers, elephants climbing onto flatbed trucks, Patsy Cline singing, and James Garner!
When you're done here, you might enjoy our favorite Datsun ads, then continue with our top Toyota, Renault, General Motors, British Leyland, Ford/Lincoln/Mercury, Honda, Citroën, AMC/Jeep, Mercedes-Benz/Porsche/BMW, and Chevrolet ads.

1978 GLC	1983 Cosmo Big Run	1988 929
Bongo Multivan	Titan	1989 RX-7
1980 RX-7	1980 Cosmo	1967 Cosmo Sport

Yes, everything was going just fine for this veteran LeMons team… until those pesky wheel studs decided they'd had enough. Fortunately, the driver walked away from the wreck, and the team was kind enough to donate their car as a substitute for the last-second-pardoned People's Curse winner. This is why LeMons racing requires those "overkill" roll cages and Snell SA2000 helmets.


And here's what it looked like from outside the car:

Yes, the White Lightning Mazda RX-7 took the overall win by two laps over the Lightning McQueen Volkswagen Jetta, just hours after being spared the People's Curse. We're busy packing up the LeMons circus right now, but I'll try to get some more posts done once things calm down. Congratulations, White Lightning!

Not only that, the second-place Lightning McQueen Jetta got the second-most Curse votes. Now, the People's Curse really is a democracy, so the Mazda was going to get destroyed... unless the people could be persuaded to issue a pardon to the super-clean-driving, not-very-cheaty (and perhaps even totally legit) RX-7.

So, LeMons Chief Perp Jay Lamm appealed to the crowd for mercy on the wrongly accused White Lightning car, and the thumbs-up votes overwhelmed the highly vocal thumbs-down faction. Of course, some car needs to get crushed, and we had three volunteers: the Torqueless Rotards RX-7 (which flipped over yesterday), a head-gasket-challenged BMW E30, and a bedless Ford Ranger.

So White Lightning is back out on the track, and the Lightning McQueen Jetta is a couple laps back. When will the VW make its move? Will the Molde Carlo Chevy get past both? We'll find out!

That's right, the Molde Carlo, which spent most of the last race in a billion pieces in the pits (various brake, transmission, and engine ailments), has been quietly racking up laps and avoiding penalties, and it now sits just 8 laps behind the leader. If that's not surprise enough for you, check out the Black Sheep Racing Nissan 300ZX, which has stayed alive long after almost all the other Zs have blown up and/or crashed and will start the day tomorrow in fifth place. Remember, out of the dozens of Zs that have raced in LeMons, the most successful placed 8th overall (and, yes, this is one of the two Nissan Zs that have placed 8th).

2nd place: Lightning McQueen, Volkswagen Jetta


3rd place: Molde Carlo, Chevrolet Monte Carlo


4th place: Flying Purple People Eater, Mazda RX-7


5th place: Black Sheep Racing, Nissan 300ZX

Yes, the White Lightning Sawzall-convertible 1986 Mazda RX-7 (that's a photograph from the LeMons South Spring '09 race, since I haven't had time to shoot many photos today) is the current race leader. The team captain owns a rotary Mazda shop, and we've always been real suspicious of this car... but it's either totally legit or we're dealing with a South Carolinian Smokey Yunick here. Probably the latter, but ya never know, ya know?

The Torqueless Rotards RX-7 was doing pretty well... until it became a three-wheeler. The driver was fine, thanks to the magic of roll cage bars and seat harnesses, but the car is pretty much through. The driver thought that another car must have hit him, since the impact was so hard and unexpected, but the in-car video camera on the Our Lady Of Perpetual Downforce Civic let Chief Perp Lamm know that he'd need to invoke the "Why Am I On My Roof" penalty this time.

Don't tell El Presidente, but many of those engine parts may not be completely destroyed; the bearings definitely get creamed by the clunkerizing process, but a standard engine rebuild ought to be able to get a clunkerized engine back in working order. Of course, in most cases it's not worth doing so, but junkyard scavengers are already grabbing cylinder heads and other goodies off clunkerated powerplants.

I made a trip to several East Bay self-service wrecking yards in search of Cash For Clunkers victims, and I found plenty! I suspect that most of the Explorers, F150s, Cherokees, and the like are bypassing wrecking yards and heading straight to The Crusher, but those searching for nice body/interior components, suspensions, transmissions, and the like for 1990s high-end European machinery are in for some happy hunting (mixed with a healthy dose of tears for all the perfectly good BMW 7 series sedans, 10-year-old Jaguars, and other cool machinery that got caught up in the Clunkpocalypse).

Likewise, builders of street rods are no doubt rejoicing over all those MN12 Fords that got Clunk-O-Lated™, because they'll find a bonanza of swap-ready IRS rear suspension setups in those Cougars, Thunderbirds, and Continentals. I found three beclunked MN12s, all in near-showroom condition, side-by-side in one yard. Meanwhile, there's a certain clunkxecuted RX-7 GSL rear end I've got earmarked for my 20R Sprite project.

1994 BMW 740.


I don't feel too bad about all those Explorers getting destroyed, but first-gen RX-7s are getting really rare these days. Looks like some gratuitous forklift damage on this one.


MN12s galore!





There are many fewer XJ6s and XJ-Ss on the streets today, thanks to Cash For Clunkers.





Let's hope some of these MN12 suspensions live on in other cars.













Many, many BMW Big Six engines have met their doom via Cash For Clunkers.

How about a 1992 BMW 318iS? No going out in a blaze of LeMons glory for this E30!









The interior in this '90 Eldorado was just about perfect.


1990 Cadillac Eldorado

Mazda's continued development of the rotary engine will likely spawn a larger displacement version that could provide an RX-7 driver with something not synonymous with the rotary engine and something completely lacking in the 4-door RX-8 — torque. Best Car provided us with their rendition of the new RX-7, betting on Mazda continuing with their current 'Nagare' design theme that's most recently made its way onto the new Mazda3.

Are these rumors any more substantial than any of the other rumors we've seen? We'll put it this way — we'll believe it when we see it.

[via 7tune]

We're not quite sure what to make of this list. A Saab leading? An Audi in the top ten? A Fiero? Two Jettas? There's no telling what will happen tomorrow, but we're guessing that this herd will be thinned somewhat by mechanical problems... or maybe not! Check in tomorrow for more LeMons action right here!

The area in which Tomsk shot these cars is an old stomping ground of mine, from back in my college days. Yes, when my hobbies included siphoning gas from a '68 Mercury whilst clad in a Dark Angel shirt and generally lowering UC Irvine's property values. In fact, this yellow Corolla sure looks like the one my freshman-year girlfriend had Earl Scheib shoot in "Sun Yellow" for $59.95 (seatbelts, tires, tailpipe, and all), if you assume that 20 years of Southern California sunshine might take a fearsome toll on a cheap paint job. We've also got a first-gen RX-7, of the sort that's getting seriously rare on the street these days. Tomsk describes them thus:

This early first-gen RX-7 looks to be a genuine survivor, from the jewel-like wheels to the badge one the rear proudly proclaiming the powerplant as 100% piston-free. Sure, the right front fender has seen a little action, but on the whole, you'd be pretty hard pressed to find a nicer example that doesn't live in a climate-controlled garage.

Aside from a full-tilt-boogie AE86, this Malaise Era Toyota Corolla 2-door is about as far removed from today's Maytag-esque Corolla as a car with the same name can get. Evidence: P*ssy magnet yellow paint, abundance of surfing-related stickers in the windows, and badges that proudly read "Deluxe" and "5 speed."

Thanks to Myke Toman, Nick Pon, Zerin Dube and Speed:Sport:Life, Anna C of Bikini Racer, the Norwegian Slaabs, Saabs Gone Wild, Prison Break Racing, Team Beermer, LeMons Supreme Court Justice Lieberman, Jackson Williams, and others for their fine photographs.

As a member of the new Mega Cheater class, this team started the race beneath the crushing weight of 800 penalty laps. A nice, shiny FC RX-7 for 500 bucks? This lil' orange devil ran a crazy-fast best lap of 1:35.990 and finished 97th… ahead of the other Mega Cheaters.


These guys are serious RX-7 racers who really know what they're doing, and thus it was tough for them to avoid a 20-lap BS penalty. Without it: 8th place; with it: 23rd place.


Here's the 3rd-place car from Arse Freeze '07; this time they got 67th place. Their 1:38.424 best lap speaks for itself, though.


Pitmates to the RotoRevenge and SNOT RAcinG Mazdas, the Old Punks are also Arse Freeze '07 veterans. They finished 8th last year, and 26th this time. 1:36.263 best lap- hey, those old RX-7s are quick!


Everyone loves the bewinged Miata from Altamont, though we suspect it would have been quicker than 1:39.385 without the added weight.


Team Eyesore Racing is a genuine member of LeMons-veteran royalty, with a People's Choice win at LeMons SF '08 and some excellent wheelmen and wheelwomen. The nightmarish-yet-incredibly-cool Ghettocharging setup on their patched-together-from-corpses race car looked like it would blow up for sure on the track, but instead it held together for a 4th-place finish. Not only that, its best lap time of 1:32.692 was second only to the post-Curse Blues Brothers Crown Vic!


Yet another quick RX-7; the Loose Nuts '84 ran a best lap of 1:37.117 and came in 37th place.


Tip for wannabe LeMons racers: when you put a Jackson turbocharging setup on a non-thrashed Miata and don't provide any sort of convincing documentary evidence of how much you paid for that stuff (no, allegedly copy/pasted text from a Craigslist ad doesn't count), you're going to pay big in the BS Inspection. The Dead Smurfs took their punishment like real men, however, and they very kindly let the car-deprived Cheese Eating Surrender Monkeys take some laps in their car.


Hey, it's the former Autoblog racer from LeMons Demolition Derby '07 (aka LeMons SF '07)! Mechanical problems limited this team- made up of fellow Alamedans and pitted right next door to the Black Metal V8olvo at Thunderhill- to a 68th-place finish.

Now, yesterday we saw a 69% Booth Numbah Two recommendation on the $8,995 Chevette, and now we're looking at a car from the same era that's priced at six grand more… yet I suspect we're going to see a little more enthusiasm for the price tag on this pristine example of Wankel history. It's for sale by the original owner. It's a California car, and it was always garaged. The odometer hasn't even hit 2,500 miles yet! It's been bid up to nearly 10 grand by now, but anyone willing to fire a big $15,000 Buy It Now cruise missile right this minute can take it home ASAP. Is it worth it? You decide!

[eBay Motors], thanks to TK for the tip.

As you can see, the Skyline was far from stock. It started life as an R32 GTS-T, but now it's powered by a RB26 from an R33 GT-R. The ride feels brutal at first, but you quickly adjust your mindset as your expectations realize that this is a full-on stripped-out racer capable of running in the highest level of drift competition. You may think it sounds loud in the video, but that was with the silencer on, something that comes off when it hits the track.

While the shop at ONI JDM isn't particularly big, you get the sense that the business is an extension of the guys' passion. Take the guy that gave me a drive in the R32, he worked as a mechanic during the week, but was a racer and drifter on the weekends. Now, I know that many of us here at Jalopnik aren't necessarily into the tuner scene, but you've gotta admire that dual-purpose spirit of racing on Sunday then wrenching on Monday.

So, despite the free health care, we've discovered the first real reason to move to Canada: awesome JDM rides.

[Check out their website at: ONIJDM.com]