We've made no bones about the fact that we genuinely like Spyker Cars re-founder Victor Muller. He's a friendly, humble guy who comes across as a no-shitter in a sea of egotists and pipe-dreamers, even if he himself is a dreamer. But he's a dreamer in the best possible way. He got the company off the ground and before he announced that he's stepping down as CEO on May 21st to focus on design and branding, he managed to spearhead a number of projects, getting a pack of attention-grabbing exotics off the ground on the back of a brand nobody'd thought of in years, had cars run at events like Le Mans and Sebring, and last year, acquired a Formula 1 team. Not bad for a seven-year run. What's more the company's even turning a profit. We're not sure what the internal goings-on are at Spyker so we have no real comment to offer, other than that we wish Victor the best in his new endeavor. Spyker F1 head Michiel Mol will hold the CEO spot in the interim while the search for a new CEO takes place. Press release after the jump.

After seven and a half years at the helm of Spyker since its foundation in 2000, Victor Muller has
requested the Supervisory Board to agree to him reducing his general management tasks as CEO and
to focus on design and branding exclusively. Michiel Mol, until now Director of Formula One Racing
within the Management Board, will assume the role of interim CEO in addition thereto.
Victor Muller explains his decision:

"It has been such a privilege to lead the (re)creation of Spyker since Maarten de Bruijn and I founded the company on January 1, 2000. No one could have anticipated then the exceptional growth that would materialize in the years to come. With 450 employees worldwide, the company has now entered a phase where different management skills are required than those that were instrumental to create the company and build the brand until this point. Michiel Mol has those skills and I am proud to hand over the reins to such a competent and energetic partner. It allows me to do what I am best at: brand building."

He continues: "With the acquisition of the Formula One Team in September 2006, I also gained a business partner experienced in successfully building up large companies. At that point Michiel and I
started discussions on the possibilities for my succession. After more than seven years of very hard
work I felt it was time for me to lift the throttle a bit."

Michiel Mol adds: "Whilst Victor's decision to stand down from the role of CEO has come sooner than
expected the team that he built remains. I see my key role going forward as continuing to strengthen
and expand that team with the most capable motor industry talent available. In time, one of those
recruitments will need to be for the role of CEO as I return my focus and energies to the building of
the Spyker Formula One Team. Until that point I am highly committed to take on the responsibilities
of leading the company."

Hessel Lindenbergh, President of the Supervisory Board says: "On behalf of the Board, I would like to
thank Victor for his efforts in building the Spyker brand to where it is today. We respect his difficult
decision to stand down after more than seven years from the role of CEO but are fortunate to have
within our ranks a capable replacement in Michiel. He will take on the responsibilities of the position
until we appoint an experienced automotive leader with the talent and vision to take Spyker Cars to
the next level". – Davey G. Johnson

Breaking news: Victor Muller weg als CEO bij Spyker [Autoblog.nl]

Related:
The Good Kind of Consolidation: Spyker Angling to Buy Lotus? [Internal]

Sweet Peet fires a few shots across Wendelin's bow in this week's tirade, calling the Cayenne an abject failure and current Porsche management a bunch of bumbling bureaucrats who've essentially pissed away Porsche's legacy. We're not so sure about that. Cayenne sales certainly have reached the saturation point; everyone who wants one has one. But the His Sweetness continually talks about Wiedeking's faithlessness to Dr. Porsche's legacy. Lest we forget, ol' Ferdinand designed tractors and tanks. Porsche, like Honda, is an engineering company, and while the Cayenne is ungainly and not something we would ever buy, it is an engineering feat. We'd probably buy a Tiger tank, though. Actually, we'd totally buy a Tiger tank and roll through the streets of Modesto cranking Wilson Pickett. – Davey G. Johnson

The Man Who Sold Porsche's Soul. [Autoextremist]

Related:
Autoextremist Knows Things You Don't, Not Afraid to Let You In On That [Internal]

Herr Doktor Thomas Weber von Mercedes-Benz hat einen absichtlichen Witz gemacht! Is this yet another indicator that the Germans may not be quite as precise as previously thought? – Davey G. Johnson

Related:
Bluetec, 4Matic, Ocean Drive and Emmitt Smith: Mercedes-Benz Detroit Press Intro [Internal]

Either Fortune's Alex Taylor has an axe to grind into the cutting equivalent of a Henckels with somebody at FoMoCo, or the Blue Oval is as screwed as a garage band that just signed with Warner Brothers without reading the fine print. Taylor is rather merciless in his assessment of the Spawn of Henry, and it definitely comes through that he's not impressed with new honcho Alan Mulally.

We're wait-and-see on the flyboy, but we agree with Taylor that Detroit corporate culture has to die across the board. We've seen it at Ford, we've seen it at GM, and we've seen it at Chrysler Group. And while it may be an obvious statement, Taylor's take is a bang-on crib sheet for a pop quiz on why the American auto industry is choking on its own fumes. Detroit is dead. Long live Detroit! – Davey G. Johnson

Ford's student driver takes the wheel [CNN/Money]

Related:
Just In Case You Forgot: The Ford Capri [Internal]

It's one of those evenings. Really. Everything's played. Most of the large majority of a plethora of things by and large suck. Which means we're reduced to ranting. Sure, we could toe the Gawker line and bitch that Si can rim us and Jobs' cotomer sevis is roughly at-or-below third-world levels. And then we realize the reality of a Si Newhouse analingus session and decide that we'll stick to bitching about how Apple's hardware has reached a pinnacle of suckdom, and that we have more Mac knowledge in the rather icky fluid from a singular popped zit than the fools on the tech line have in all of their neurons compiled. So here then, friends, is a call. Jump through, because we like front-page economy and this particular bit of idiocy has rambled on long enough (Wert's Tolstoy-esque posts notwithstanding.)

And here, friends, is the surprisingly simple answer to things. Stop building stupid cars! If I can't put my fucking seat belt on when I need to in a FJ Cruiser, what's the point of any sort of ability to clamber up steep inclines? If I buy a car with six-billion horsepower and want to fry my rear tires, what's stopping me? Murder the government. Blow up the ocean. Take a Makita to the tires of every "liberal" owner of a 4WD vehicle built after 1985 and take a hand grenade to the red-state owners of the selfsame trucks. Unless, of course, they're Subaru BRATS. Wait...what was the cutoff year for the BRAT anyway? Fuckit. Pull the pin and give us our RWD back in any sort of exciting form. It's a sad day when drifters are reduced to yanking the front diffs from Imprezas.

A jihad against automotive dumbness must start now. And since nobody seems to be starting it, well, it's starting right here. War, children. The shit's on. Now get cracking on not sucking. Give us a reason to get back to giving you the business and not simply spend our days picking off groupers in Coke cans. Seriously. We're getting bored over here.
Hearts and deep tongue-kisses,
Los Jalopniks. – Er, okay, mostly Davey G. Johnson

In a five-year retrospective on the effect that 9/11 had on the nation's economy, Slate's Daniel Gross asks why the financial first-responders have often ended up pushing up daisies five years after the fact, a portion of note to Los Jalopniks was the wave of zero-percent financing unfurled to keep America rolling and consuming. Quoth the Gross:

Consumers became conditioned to the availability of financing gimmicks, rebates, and incentives, which has killed margins at GM and Ford. And the efforts didn't succeed in stopping the firms' continuing slide in market share.

Sept. 11's Financial Heroes [Slate]

Related:
FoMoCo's Way Forward II: A Way Out of Ford? [Internal]

Honestly, it boils down to this: Not Rick Wagoner, Bill Ford, Carlos Ghosn, Bernd Pieschetsrieder, J rgen Schrempp, Sergio Marchionne, Roger Smith, Katsuaki Watanabe, nor even Dieter Zetsche nor Lido will ever be known as "Il Commendatore." And this friends, is why modern culture is sucking right now. We need us some Duces, some F hrers, some Emperors; some His Majesties the Whatevers. And then we need a bunch of anarcho-syndicalists just for fun. Throw in a Papa Hemingway for good measure. Remember back in the Eighties when Goodyear used to run the spot that asked something like, "Why does every new Ferrari ride on Goodyear tires?"

(Cut to red italian supercar stopping after haviing blasted up a mountain road, silver-haired, be-sunglassed European man exiting driver's door.) "Because Mister Ferrari wants it that way." Now try imagining Ghosn, for example, leaving the exact same car in the exact same shot. Ghosn's pen probably isn't stocked with purple ink, either. Face it, you'd go buy a set of Sumitomos or Bridgestones just to not be associated with the guy. We're tired of stock-exchange democracy, ridiculous cost-cutting, needless gadgets and lawsuit diplomacy. Adventures with multiple fists! Onward! Upward! Kill the Corolla! Down with the 612 Sca(nk)g! Viva the Corvair Monza! Viva Cannon Ball Baker! Viva chest hair!

Related:
A Bit About Wealth Car-Guy Culture [Internal]

According to the AP, KirkKerk's Tracinda Corp, which owns nearly a 10th of GM, in a partnership with Renault and Nissan, could easily purchase 30% of the ailing American automaker, giving them a hefty vote on the board, and possibly ending Rick Wagoner's lifelong career with the General. Some are for the deal, hailing Carlos as a turnaround genius, while others see it as a ploy by Kerkorian to get his way. In any event, things undoubtedly just got more hairball at the RenCen, especially among the lifelong Michiganders who blanch at the thought of moving to the Volunteer State.

Experts: Kerkorian may take control of GM [Contra Costa Times]

Related:
More GM-Renault-Nissan

From Reuters:

About 37,000 hourly workers have accepted buyout offers by General Motors Corp. and Delphi Corp., potentially giving the automaker greater cuts than expected, a newspaper said on Friday.

About 28,000 GM workers, or almost one-quarter of the work force at automaker [Jeez, who's copyediting over there, the late Herv Villechaize? — ed.] that are represented by the United Auto Workers union, had taken the offer as of late Thursday, UAW officials said, according to The Wall Street Journal.

The offer ends on Friday.

About 9,000 workers at Delphi, a former GM parts unit that has filed for bankruptcy, have taken the offer.

About 37,000 workers accept GM, Delphi buyouts-WSJ [Reuters]

Related:
Breaking! Delphi And GM Jointly Offer Buyout Agreement To Unions [internal]

Looks like FoMoCo may soon have to pay the shys a few extra points' vig to cover its "responsibilities" (if you know what we mean, and we think you do). The company and its Ford Motor Credit division have taken a pre-hit from S&P, which placed them on CreditWatch-negative, which means it could be in for another credit-rating drop — putting the company's bonds ever deeper into junk status. The boys on the street say they're not satisfied Ford's keeping up with its obligations — they're losing market share and their product mix is oogatz. They'd better shape up or out come the persuaders, and then it's lights-out time.

Related:
Forbes on Fitch on Ford: Whose Credibility is Really at Stake? [internal]

He of the Sweetness, Peetness and D-ness, the Autoextremist himself, weighs in on "Teflon Jim" Press' quest to convince the world that Toyota's not just another car company, and giggles to himself about the company's current predicament. Meanwhile, over at BusinessWeek, Press weighs in on his new position, and says with a straight face, "Hybrid is the way you gain the synergy of combining stored energy that you store when you don't need it and release when you do." Actually, the BusinessWeek piece is worth a read.

Toyota's Jim Press Discusses the Future [BusinessWeek]
Toyota's "Master Manipulators" get caught with their pants down [Autoextremist]

Related:
Jim Press-ing On After Toyota Sex Scandal [Internal]

Looks like Fiat may be putting some money into its prosciutto-bank, or is at least altering its corporate trajectory in an upward direction. In a speech yesterday, CEO Sergio Marchionne implied the car company could repurchase the 11.7 percent chunk of Ferrari it sold last year to Mediobanca, as part of a major debt restructuring and overall gasp for fidicuary air. Rumors that the company was planning to spin off the prancing horse in a public stock offering have died down of late, but we'd imagine that if such a plan were in place, Marchionne would want Fiat to get the spoils. Watch this space.

Related:
The Italians Are Coming! Fiat Announces Alfa Romeo's US Return [internal]

Can Idol change Ford's blue tune? [Detroit News]

Related:
Ford Apes Lance Armstrong, Mopar, Chevrolet, etc... [internal]

Jason Vines, the uncommonly blunt veep of communications over at Chrysler Group, took a swipe at oil companies on the company's media-only blog, exhorting that "Big Oil would rather fill the pockets of its executives and shareholders, rather than spend sufficient amounts to reduce the price of fuel, letting consumers, during tough economic times, pick up the tab." ExxonMobil, meanwhile, commented that Vines' comments didn't merit comment. Comments?

Chrysler blasts Big Oil [The Detroit News]

Related:
Yellin' 'Bout Oil in WDC [Internal]

Mr Bakafish just hipped us to an article in the San Francisco Chronicle reporting that Dieter Zetsche's beloved sitcom, Arrested Development, has been finally laid to rest and will not be airing on Showtime as we originally reported. There's no comment in the story from the DaimlerChrysler boss who played Tobias F nke, although we imagine that Dieter's somewhat relieved that he can now leave behind the AD rollercoaster behind and finally concentrate on fixing J rgen Schrempp's mess.

R.I.P., 'Arrested Development' [SFGate]

Related:
Best. Dieter. Photo. Ever [Internal]

A friend of ours who, until recently, was in the car-review biz, gave the Chevy Cobalt SS a lukewarm review, pointing out the harsh motor, plasticky interior and doofy rear wing. GM's response? Anger, misery, yanking of advertising from the publication he worked for. When the HHR dropped, GM Executive for small cars, Lori Queen, dropped by personally with the test vehicle, pointing out all of the features, but, to quote our friend, "But, when we asked simple questions like, 'Why does this look just like a PT?' and 'How come the dash is harder than my Labrador's head?' she took it VERY personally, like we insulted her kid."

Our source goes on to note that he thinks Queen's a very nice lady, but the problem here is endemic to the head-in-the-sand groupthink over at GM. And now the Detroit News is reporting that Rick Wagoner hisself issued an apology after Queen targeted Consumer Reports in a letter to Automotive News, personally calling Consumer Reports' head of auto testing David Champion, to assure him that Queen wasn't speaking for everyone at GM. Apparently just for the hurt feelings of those on the Cobalt development team. We've never had any dealings with Queen one way or another, but then again, nobody at GM will talk to us.

GM exec's rant prompts apology [Detroit News]

Related:
Oopsie! Bean Counter Mishap At The General (Again...)

You know, we always thought Carlos Ghosn's plan to uproot Nissan North America from Southern California and re-pot it in Tennessee sounded like a risky go. After all, what has Nashville given us of any worth since Hank Sr. and Patsy passed on to the great big Opry in the sky? Meanwhile, SoCal's given us all manner of great stuff Bukowski, X, Black Flag, the Minutemen, dubs, 909ers, Ishtar, etc. Still, Carlos' claim that "most" employees would make the move is turning out to be false. Unless by "most" Mr. Bean's long-lost twin means "less than half."

We once worked for a company where we were part of a close-knit crew that worked for below scale because we enjoyed what we were doing. Our department allowed the salespeople to go out and make a lot of money because we were backing them up. And then over a period of three months or so, the boss decided he could make even more money by outsourcing our jobs to people in Florida with know clue about anything. And where is that company now? From what we've seen, kinda in the toilet. Carlos had that out here in SoCal. Will he have it in Tennessee? Time will tell, but Sweet Peet D.'s already calling it his Waterloo.

The Madness of King Carlos [Autoextremist]

Related:
The Autoextremist Reconstructs GM [Internal]

The hoons of Pedro are hootin' and hollerin' for some reason tonight, but we're pretty sure it's not because of the latest dish outta the RenCen: GM has revised its earnings statement for 2005 to include an additional two billion samoleons to the tally, bringing the total to a cool $10.6 bil. The discrepancy is apparently due partly to a miscalculation involving cash flow at GMAC subsidiary ResCap, as well as plant-closure costs and Delphi issues. They've delayed filing their annual report with the SEC, but promised that they'd have their late assignment turned in within two weeks.

GM revises 2005 loss to $10.6 bln after charges [Reuters]

Related:
Supplies! The Truth About the GM Death Watch [Internal]

Forbes' Richard Lehmann takes on Fitch's downgrade of Ford's credit rating from BB+ to BB, noting that in the post-Enron era, the credit agencies are doing everything they can to restore investors' faith, including forecasting futures that Lehmann seems to think may be akin to reading tea leaves, given the variables at hand. He points out that at the current rate, Ford could continue losing money for a decade and still survive. The analysis is too in-depth to fully outline here. We recommend checking the link; it's at the very least a light lunch for thought.

Fitch's Ford Rating: Dumb and Late [Forbes]

Related:
Mark Fields Drinks from the Bonus Cup at Ford [Internal]

The main architect of the Great Leap Forward, Ford North America cap'n Mark Fields has been offered an extra mil to stay for two years. However, if he bails, he's gotta pay it back. Meanwhile, Bill Ford, who isn't drawing a salary until the company achieves profitability, says that he'll donate all proceeds from performance-based bonuses to charity. Hey Bill, why don't you just donate 'em to Ford?

Ford gives Fields extra $1M to stay at least 2 years [Detroit News]

Related:
The $100,000 Question: Take the Ford Employee Buyout? [Internal]