'ello mates, I'm Bruce Brucington deep in the wild jungle. We have just located one of the rarest predator in it's nest, shortly after birth. This particular breed, the Automotius Lamborguinius, is one of the rarest of the entire species. It knows only the dark, and is so quick that you can't even blink, or you'll miss it. It takes a real man to get this close to it, you cant be a poofta in this line of work.
Oh, look. The Lamborguinius has sighted prey. It is a herd of Peugeot, easy prey for the fierce hunter Lamborguinius. The Lamborguinius circles around the herd of Peugeots, startling them. They try to flee across the river, but oh the magnificent hunter pounces! Oh, look at that power of the Lamborguinius! It's just ripping in to the fuel tank of that little Peugeot! The natural cycle of the Automotive jungle continues, the hunter and the hunted. Those not fast enough shalt soon be scrap medal.
Well, mates that'll be all for today, I gotta go get some Fosters and shrimp on the barbie, then get more drunk and chase some of the local sheilas. Join us tomorrow when we track one of the great beasts of old, an incredibly rare but slow moving enormous monstrosity known as the Tahoe Chevroletous Americanus.
Edited by Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. . at 10/02/09 3:39 PM
Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. . was starred
Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. . was unstarred
@Schm wishes he could bring back the funny. .: The next time you see a nature documentary where a predator chases, and prey flees, please note that both are on the racing line.
@lilwillie hides autos in the attic: In my case, she doesn't wonder. She's witnessed it enough times. We were driving through Edmonton, and there were three hot girls in tight short-shorts on the sidewalk, and an Aston Martin on in the lane opposite. I turned away from the girls to drool over the Aston.
Sadly, it wasn't even that tough of a decision. It's like we proved yesterday. Cars are greater than Girls.
EDIT: Interesting, it removes the Greater-Than sign, no matter how I try and use it.
It's probably just me, but these new Lamborghinis just don't do anything for me. The original, awesome Lamborghinis such as the Miura, Countach, and Diablo were awesome spectacles of RWD sports car engineering that would just as happily kill their drivers as lap a track. They were also known to start only when it suited them, randomly quit when it suited them, and spontaneously combust at will.
Sure, they were dangerous cars. But that is what made them so cool and so interesting. It took a real man to so much as open the doors of these cars, let alone drive and master them. They were the Hemingway of sports cars. Pure, visceral, testosterone-filled exercises in existentialism.
And then they "refined" Lamborghini with the introduction of the Murcielago and Gallardo, and then VW went one step further in increasing production costs so that every wannabe Hollywood douche and Kim Kardashian could have one.
And now they release the Balboni (terrible name, btw), and potentially this, and market them as being sports cars that are "exclusive", "wild", and "dangerous"?
There is nothing especially exclusive about them. There may only be 250 of them to begin with, but that will change as soon as they start selling, at which point they will be built in even bigger volumes, to the detriment of those who initially bought them. "Wild" and "dangerous"? Sorry kids, but it takes more than a pretty face to dance and capture the imagination of pubescent boys.
What happened, Lamborghini?
You've turned into the Nordstroms of sports cars. You sell expensive stuff that you claim is wild (but isn't), and then have sale after sale, but only after you ridiculously jack up your prices, just as you release a car that is wild only compared to its much tamed contemporary brethren (but a total pushover compared to its illustrious predecessors).
@Mobius_1000_Club: Apparently it worked for a guy trying to sell a green Rover.
Besides, if I buy a Lamborghini, I want a Lamborghini. I want a car where the salesman advises me that there is a 67% chance the car won't start right away, a 58% chance that it will randomly stop running, a 32% chance that the car will try to kill me, and an 18% chance it will randomly burn itself to the ground on any given day, but there is always 100% chance of awesomeness everyday of the week and twice on Sundays.
Dammit, I want a Lamborghini
These new, post-VW ownership Lambos just don't offer that.
@pauljones: What happened to Lamborghini was a family of purists got bought out by a giant multi-national corporation who have to answer to shareholders. Every decision is tempered by that all consuming need to constantly bolster the bottom line.
Gone are the days when you could make an insane sports car in your tractor shop and bring it to market with every dime invested in making it a better car. Now it's all about safety and regulations and appealing to as wide an audience as possible rather than going after the niche enthusiasts.
Dammit pauljones! I was in a great mood before coming across your comment. Now I just want to take over the world so I can save Lambo from themselves.
@pauljones: The car you are looking for is a Koenigsegg. Or maybe a Caparo T1. A Pagani Zonda F ZR Prosciutto di Parma might also work.
Lamborghini is just far too buttoned-down these days. The company that gave the finger to Ferrari, stole BMW's money, went 180 mph on 60 Minutes, told Gandini to shove it, eschewed slushboxes (mostly), and made the Jota no longer exists.
@brandegee: Amen. Lamborghini is dead. Practicality killed it.
I think that because car making is no longer a blank instructional book that the engineers are going to write as they build their cars, but rather a book that's now filled and tells them how to do exactly what to make what component behave in exactly what way, and all for a certain price, and lasts a certain number of years. Sure it's imperfect, but it's, for all intents and purposes to us enthusiasts, too close to perfect. An engineer can no longer do something world-breaking with a car. It is no longer an art, but an exact science. And science is no fun.
What's more, it is only logical to make a car better than the one before it. And now, after decades of hooning and honing, the car is so competent, it's become painfully boring. No longer can one be excited driving down a country road, no longer does one need to stay awake and concentrated to drive to the shops, no longer is driving beyond the speed limit a death sentence to the driver and every single passenger.
It's over. Cars simply cannot be both competitive and exciting without being overwhelming (unless you are Michael Schumacher). Let's all build scramjet-powered ekranoplanes until that becomes boring.
The Lambo looks and sounds great. But all Lambos look and sound about the same. It's hard to get worked up when every iteration is, to my eye, virtually identical.
@Sportwagons, more popular than Grimace: Plus the naming schemes just confuse the issue further. Seemingly random sequences of numbers and letters make sense only to diehard fanboys. But people like me don't know a 2010 Mucielago XXXX-XX-X from a 2002 Lambo XXX-XX-X
@Sportwagons, more popular than Grimace: It's not that hard. The difference is more noticeable at the back, where 90% of us will look anyway. There's the Murcielago
10/03/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/03/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
'ello mates, I'm Bruce Brucington deep in the wild jungle. We have just located one of the rarest predator in it's nest, shortly after birth. This particular breed, the Automotius Lamborguinius, is one of the rarest of the entire species. It knows only the dark, and is so quick that you can't even blink, or you'll miss it. It takes a real man to get this close to it, you cant be a poofta in this line of work.
Oh, look. The Lamborguinius has sighted prey. It is a herd of Peugeot, easy prey for the fierce hunter Lamborguinius. The Lamborguinius circles around the herd of Peugeots, startling them. They try to flee across the river, but oh the magnificent hunter pounces! Oh, look at that power of the Lamborguinius! It's just ripping in to the fuel tank of that little Peugeot! The natural cycle of the Automotive jungle continues, the hunter and the hunted. Those not fast enough shalt soon be scrap medal.
Well, mates that'll be all for today, I gotta go get some Fosters and shrimp on the barbie, then get more drunk and chase some of the local sheilas. Join us tomorrow when we track one of the great beasts of old, an incredibly rare but slow moving enormous monstrosity known as the Tahoe Chevroletous Americanus.
10/02/09
10/02/09
I couldn't handle the pressure.
10/02/09
10/02/09
Across the lands, Spouses wonder why their signifigant other is fixated on rear quarter panels and not the bedroom.
10/02/09
Sadly, it wasn't even that tough of a decision. It's like we proved yesterday. Cars are greater than Girls.
EDIT: Interesting, it removes the Greater-Than sign, no matter how I try and use it.
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
Well... we don't, but it's the principle of the matter.
10/02/09
10/02/09
10/02/09
You have principles?
10/02/09
I thought you were going to change your name?
10/02/09
10/03/09
07/15/09
07/15/09
Sure, they were dangerous cars. But that is what made them so cool and so interesting. It took a real man to so much as open the doors of these cars, let alone drive and master them. They were the Hemingway of sports cars. Pure, visceral, testosterone-filled exercises in existentialism.
And then they "refined" Lamborghini with the introduction of the Murcielago and Gallardo, and then VW went one step further in increasing production costs so that every wannabe Hollywood douche and Kim Kardashian could have one.
And now they release the Balboni (terrible name, btw), and potentially this, and market them as being sports cars that are "exclusive", "wild", and "dangerous"?
There is nothing especially exclusive about them. There may only be 250 of them to begin with, but that will change as soon as they start selling, at which point they will be built in even bigger volumes, to the detriment of those who initially bought them. "Wild" and "dangerous"? Sorry kids, but it takes more than a pretty face to dance and capture the imagination of pubescent boys.
What happened, Lamborghini?
You've turned into the Nordstroms of sports cars. You sell expensive stuff that you claim is wild (but isn't), and then have sale after sale, but only after you ridiculously jack up your prices, just as you release a car that is wild only compared to its much tamed contemporary brethren (but a total pushover compared to its illustrious predecessors).
07/15/09
But then again, nor are burning cars.
Or maybe it's the Audi/German-ness that make their cars, well, better cars, but worse supercars.
07/15/09
Besides, if I buy a Lamborghini, I want a Lamborghini. I want a car where the salesman advises me that there is a 67% chance the car won't start right away, a 58% chance that it will randomly stop running, a 32% chance that the car will try to kill me, and an 18% chance it will randomly burn itself to the ground on any given day, but there is always 100% chance of awesomeness everyday of the week and twice on Sundays.
Dammit, I want a Lamborghini
These new, post-VW ownership Lambos just don't offer that.
07/15/09
Gone are the days when you could make an insane sports car in your tractor shop and bring it to market with every dime invested in making it a better car. Now it's all about safety and regulations and appealing to as wide an audience as possible rather than going after the niche enthusiasts.
Dammit pauljones! I was in a great mood before coming across your comment. Now I just want to take over the world so I can save Lambo from themselves.
07/15/09
Lamborghini is just far too buttoned-down these days. The company that gave the finger to Ferrari, stole BMW's money, went 180 mph on 60 Minutes, told Gandini to shove it, eschewed slushboxes (mostly), and made the Jota no longer exists.
07/15/09
I think that because car making is no longer a blank instructional book that the engineers are going to write as they build their cars, but rather a book that's now filled and tells them how to do exactly what to make what component behave in exactly what way, and all for a certain price, and lasts a certain number of years. Sure it's imperfect, but it's, for all intents and purposes to us enthusiasts, too close to perfect. An engineer can no longer do something world-breaking with a car. It is no longer an art, but an exact science. And science is no fun.
What's more, it is only logical to make a car better than the one before it. And now, after decades of hooning and honing, the car is so competent, it's become painfully boring. No longer can one be excited driving down a country road, no longer does one need to stay awake and concentrated to drive to the shops, no longer is driving beyond the speed limit a death sentence to the driver and every single passenger.
It's over. Cars simply cannot be both competitive and exciting without being overwhelming (unless you are Michael Schumacher). Let's all build scramjet-powered ekranoplanes until that becomes boring.
Amen.
06/30/09
06/30/09
06/30/09
Meh.
06/30/09
06/30/09
The LP640
This one
And the Reventon
06/30/09
06/30/09
07/01/09
06/30/09
(hint: insurance search)