• Jalopnik
  • spy-photos
  • jalopnik-reviews
  • Profile logout login

#importantannouncement

Jalopnik

Share Cancel
   
Upload an image | Add an image URL
×

logging in
  • FAQ. Include # before tag:
  • #offtopic,
  • #tips,
  • #spyphotos,
  • etc.

Detroit, 11:54 PM
Sun Dec 6
13 posts in the last 24 hours

Contact

Tip your editors:

Editor-in-Chief:
Ray Wert | | AIM

Road Test Editor:
Wes Siler |

Weekend Editor:
Murilee Martin |

Associate Editor - Houston:

Associate Editor - Detroit:

Editor-at-Large:

Contributors:

John Krewson |

Follow Jalopnik on:
Facebook
Twitter

SUBSCRIBE TO Jalopnik RSS

New: Breaking news and daily top stories via email
1753 Subscribers
Jalopnik
  • posts about #importantannouncement more →

    GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses

  • Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.

    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of UDMan UDMan
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    To all of the above comments, you're all very funny. But this looks like more bad news about the once proud Automobile Company.


    GM Wanted another $10B from the government to help in facilitating the GM Chrysler merger. I have no idea why they needed the cash, since the merger was going to be an almost cashless merger.


    A cashless merger, how can that be? Well, from what I understand, it will go something like this. 1) Cerberus owns 51% of GMAC, and 80% of Chrysler. Cerberus wants all of GMAC, and will trade it's portion of Chrysler for it. 2) Daimler owns 20% of Chrysler and really wants out of it altogether. GM has a division they have been trying to get rid of for over a year, the Medium Duty Truck Division. 3) Daimler likes the truck division, and closed down the Sterling Brand recently, so it has room for this acquisition, especially for no cash. 4) So Cerberus receives all of GMAC, controlls all of Chrysler Financial, and dumps the car division. 5) GM owns Chrysler Motors, 3 very modern production facilities, Jeep, Minivans, and access to Cummins Powertrains, and gets rid of the Medium Truck Brand. 6) Daimler gets low priced medium duty trucks to add to their Freightliner and Western Star brands.......


    And everyone loses.

     Reply
    UDMan was starred UDMan was unstarred
    Image of Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est
    11/05/08

    @UDMan: Looks to me like Daimler will be better off than with 20% of Chrysler. But yes, everyone else loses.
     Reply
    Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was starred Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was unstarred
    Image of Novaload Novaload
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    In a stunning reversal, GM announced that what's good for America is good for GM.
     Reply
    Novaload was starred Novaload was unstarred
    Image of Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. . Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. .
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    GM To Chrysler:


    Wanna get together? Check yes, no, maybe?


    In other news, GM will be outsourcing all jobs (Except for boardmembers and CEO's of course) to India! Better brush up on your Hindi!

     Reply
    Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. . was starred Schm, enjoying his first desert winter. . was unstarred
    Image of AmishJohn AmishJohn
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    Darn. I was really hoping for the Hummer H9 to come out... you know, the one built on the Aveo chassis?
     Reply
    AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred
    Image of P161911 probably shoudn't have P161911 probably shoudn't have
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    Hope you REALLY like the 2009 models, they are going to be EXACLTY the same for 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014......
     Reply
    P161911 probably shoudn't have was starred P161911 probably shoudn't have was unstarred
    Image of TurboWeasel TurboWeasel
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    The local PTA made more money than GM with their annual bake sale. GM Management formed an investigative commitee, took input from focus groups and the press, reviewed their product offer against consumer preferences, and after this thorough analysis they will now be including a free muffin with every car purchased.
     Reply
    TurboWeasel was starred TurboWeasel was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    11/05/08

    @TurboWeasel: Mmm...muffins...


    And that applies to whichever type you're talking about.

     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of tonyola tonyola
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    GM will drop all existing car and truck brands and bring back Oldsmobile, Oakland, Marquette, Viking, and LaSalle
     Reply
    tonyola was starred tonyola was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    11/05/08

    @tonyola: Gee, that old LaSalle ran great.


    Those were the days.

     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of MazdaSpeedy MazdaSpeedy
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    Maybe the major change is that the Camaro will actually be going on sale!
     Reply
    MazdaSpeedy was starred MazdaSpeedy was unstarred
    Image of dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity
    11/05/08

    @Mustang lovin' non-redneck...not that there's anything wron...: The Camaro is not yet on sale? I saw one the other day (in Northern California): I guess I should have taken a picture...
     Reply
    dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity was starred dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity was unstarred
    Image of Ash78, cube farmer Ash78, cube farmer
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    The coin slots will be expanded to accomodate Sacajawea Dollars? That's the most important change of all.
     Reply
    Ash78, cube farmer was starred Ash78, cube farmer was unstarred
    Image of WheatKing WheatKing
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    GM announces that BarretJackson will be auctioning off whole GM plants including tooling.. want to make a numbers matching Cobalt-SS for future investment purposes.. no problem! Want a specialty built 1 off hummer that features an ecotech 4cyl.. you can now do it yourself. Want to turn the Renn Cen into your own personal indoor gokart-paintball facility.. NO PROBLEM!


    NO RESERVE!! NO CREDIT CHECK!! NO QUESTIONS ASKED!! NO ONE WILL BE TURNED DOWN!!


    *sorry, no credit cards, stock swaps, debt based financial packages, or vehicle trades. Cash or canned soup only.

     Reply
    WheatKing was starred WheatKing was unstarred
    Image of Boosted Lego Wagon Boosted Lego Wagon
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    Due to cutbacks, GM will now be reduced in rank to Colonel Motors.
     Reply
    Boosted Lego Wagon was starred Boosted Lego Wagon was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    11/05/08

    @boosted-lego-wagon: Does this mean they'll have their own secret special recipe?
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of Boosted Lego Wagon Boosted Lego Wagon
    11/05/08

    @Mad_Science: They already do = use cheap ingredients + undercook everything.
     Reply
    Boosted Lego Wagon was starred Boosted Lego Wagon was unstarred
    Image of Bumblebee Bumblebee
    11/05/08

    @boosted-lego-wagon: That was the funniest one so far: They can't really claim to be a general anymore, can they?


    Unless they mean general as in "vague", which would seem to make more sense.


    Come to think of it, what in the hell does their name mean?

     Reply
    Bumblebee was starred Bumblebee was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    11/05/08

    @Bumblebee: Generally, what's under the hood counts as a "motor".


    I'm no longer sure about the 3.4, though.

     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Graverobber Graverobber
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    Less than less than zero financing on all remaining '08s!
     Reply
    Graverobber was starred Graverobber was unstarred
    Image of Graverobber Graverobber
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    The Wentzville, MO full-size van plant will be closed due to the failure of the Chevy Straight-Talk Express model to sell.
     Reply
    Graverobber was starred Graverobber was unstarred
    Image of sos10 sos10
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    Collective suicide is never a solution.
     Reply
    sos10 was starred sos10 was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    11/05/08

    @sos10: But the Kool-aide is delicious!
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    11/05/08

    @sos10: Unless it involves Flavor-Aid.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of GoodOldSasta GoodOldSasta
    11/05/08

    @FuzzyPlushroom: mmmmm, purple flavored.
     Reply
    GoodOldSasta was starred GoodOldSasta was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    11/05/08

    @GoodOldSasta: I'm'a grip an' sip!
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of tgpt tgpt
    11/05/08

    In reply to GM To Announce "Important Changes" On Friday; We Offer Our Guesses
    I would totally buy a G3 ST.
     Reply
    tgpt was starred tgpt was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    11/05/08

    @tgpt: How 'bout a G5?
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Earlier discussions Other discussions Show all discussions Show featured discussions only Start a new discussion

Login

Enter your username and password.

Please enter a username.
Please enter your password.
logging in
Login via Facebook | Sign Up | Forgot Password?

Reset Password

Please enter your email address to have your password reset.

Please enter your email address.
Please enter a valid email address.
requesting password reset

Register

Registering will give you a user profile and the ability to add other users as friends. To become a commenter, however, you need to audition.

Want to know more? Consult the Comment FAQ and legal terms.

Please enter a username.
Please enter a password.
Please confirm your password.
Passwords are not identical.
Please enter a valid email address.
registration sent, waiting for reply

Submit Your Comment

You don't need to login to comment. Just enter your email address below.

See how your address will be displayed in the Comment FAQ.

Please enter a valid email address.
Please enter a valid email address.
logging in

Login with your Facebook or Jalopnik account.

Sign up here.



  • Archives
  • About
  • Advertising
  • Legal
  • Help
  • Report a Bug
  • FAQ
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.