Stop! Stop the video right now. I know it's tempting to run it, but we need to tell you exactly what we did first, by the numbers, so you can fully grasp the dramatic results. On the way to and from the Chicago Auto Show—overlooking the comedic jackassery Ray provided—our mission was to see how high we could push the mileage on these cars while driving them in the manner of a your average skinflint consumer. We hacked nothing off the cars to reduce weight, and we added no special taping or streamlining to enhance the aerodynamics. In fact, we really didn't do nuthin' to enhance the mileage capabilities of these rides. As for go juice, the newly de rigeur low-sulfer diesel fuel, as sanctioned by the EPA, was used in all tests. Same stuff you get when you pull up to the pump.

The 2007 Honda Civic 2.2 i-CTDi was tested under what we considered a "normal use" situation, one occupant (myself), with a weekend suitcase and a computer bag. The 2007 Audi Q7 4.2 TDI was tested with myself as the driver and the same cargo setup, but with the addition of our esteemed videographer, Mr. Mark Arnold, and his gear. Again, we recognize we didn't subject these vehicles to precisely the same conditions, but to conditions we consider the average load for each.

The route to Chicago we chose testing the Civic was notably unexciting. We set aside a roughly 105 mile path between the easternmost convenience plaza after the I-69, Toll Road 80/90 interchange, and the Portage convenience plaza. For reasons of personal incompetence, the eastbound return trip occurred between the same Portage convenience plaza and the first northbound I-69 exit after the the 80/90 to I-69 interchange. The only techniques in play where a judicious use of the gas pedal, coasting (for the manual-transmissioned Civic), and drafting behind semis, which was done at a safe but useful two-to-three car lengths. Jalopnik and Gawker Media in no way endorse tailgating semis, so copy this experiment at your own risk.

Now, restart the video.
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Yes, we know, 72.4 mpg is batshit cazy, but settle down, 'cause you haven't heard the Q7 numbers. Would you believe that a power plant capable of 550 lb.ft. of torque and a 6.4s 0-62 mph time, lugging around 5100 lbs and two svelte bloggers, returned 33.2 mpg? What was that about not handling the truth? Below are the conditions and calculations:

We are aware the gallons of fuel on the video for the Civic doesn't match with the calculation above, but we gave it a second squeeze and the final result was what you see. We have the goddamn receipts, skeptics. Soooo, the upshot? Here we have two stock vehicles you can't get in the US, delivering what everybody in their right mind would call impossible mileage, with little effort under less than ideal conditions. What does that mean to us? Well, it means all that bellyaching from automakers about unachievable CAFE targets and the less competitive, unsafe vehicles that would come from high targets is total, unadulterated bull-pucky. The solution to this pressing mileage-target legislation is an absolute no-brainer: Drop a diesel in everybody's lap and call it a day. 35 mpg from a passenger car should be child's play, if done right. This test only confirms—and frankly stokes—our burning desire for good, fun-to-drive, economical diesels on American roads. So where are they? They're elsewhere in the world. But here in the land of freedom and opportunity, the righteous and patriotic boosters of decent mileage numbers are forced to make do with runty gas-burners and do-gooder hybrids that don't exactly reward on the performance front. The times, they gotta change, and there's no reason they can't change like, um, right now.

Video production and voice over credit to Mark Arnold

The Euro spec Honda Civic 5 door we got looks like nothing on the road. Slightly alien, a little bizarre, suspiciously exciting, it's a mix and match of gentle curves and ridiculous angles that all work together to form something that really stands out. Park this at your local Wally World and you're not going to have a hard time finding it. We got comments after pulling into a Taco Bell at two in the morning. Not that the swoopy shape doesn't have it's drawbacks. The giant C-pillars take some getting used to, and while they aren't as bad as the black holes on the Toyota FJ Cruiser, it's advisable to get used to looking twice. The steep, sloping A-pillars do their part to block vision at intersections, but they don't present to much opportunity for trouble. What we don't like at all is the spoiler bump in the rear hatch. It would block headlights at dusk and at night, and it also imposes a claustrophobic feeling when checking the rear view. That said, it's not too hard to adjust to it.

The rest of the interior is a home run. The seats offer reasonable bolster, but are covered in a nice, grippy sort of perforated micofiber. They're adjustable up and down to accommodate drivers of all sizes. The tilting and telescoping steering wheel allows the instrumentation to comfortably accessed. The shifter is very similar to the uniball design Volvo introduced in the S60 a couple of years ago, but it fits nicely with the decor. We're truly smitten with the gauge cluster, however. The layout is shared with the U.S.-version Civic, featuring analog informational gauges down low and a redundant digital speedometer at the base of the windshield. What's different here is the gauges: They're a softly lit, dramatic blue concentric set with a small, square digital LED readout in the center. Not only is it gorgeous, it works great in operation. One unfortunate bauble is the gimmicky start button, which needs to be pushed, in addition to turning the key in the ignition, which is annoying in operation. We want to do one or the other, not both. Back seat? Comfortable, folds really flat for huge pass through storage. Nothing more to say there.

All right already, on to the driving. We want this engine. It does it all: delivers great mileage, supplies torque out the wazoo, has really fun engine response, and boasts a turbo whistle, to boot. At idle, the engine is a bit clattery—moreso than we would expect from a Euro offering—but once you tap the pedal things smooth out. It's a very Honda-like two engines in one: If you treat it gently, the 2.2L 138hp diesel is tame enough for Grandma; but step on it and the rush of torque is smooth and delightful. Redline comes quick at 4,500 rpm, but shifting the six speed manual keeps things in a glorious meaty chunk of 251 lb.ft. of torque. Putting the power to the pavement overwhelms the traction control and you find yourself reaching for the defeat button. Steering feedback is a couple ticks tighter then the U.S. Civic, and cornering is adequate, but the tires give up earlier than the suspension does. Road feel is perfectly acceptable, serving up a comfortable ride, not too harsh, not too soft. Sort of the Goldilocks of suspensions.

This Civic puts a whole new spin on a car we've routinely panned as boring and pedestrian in the U.S. The rare combination of unique styling, magical engine, and very nicely put-together interior has us pining for the car even more now that we've driven it. Despite the flaws, this is a really fun car which spits in the face of the diesel stereotype while embracing its most valuable asset: incredible mileage. Just how good was the mileage? You'll have to come back and find out tomorrow.

Photography by Chris Doane