Naturally, things haven't worked out so well for her in the brake department (four new rotors tend to add quite a bit to the cost of a brake job), but maybe next time will be different! Her example may be the reason I find this xkcd comic so entertaining, though the truth is that I've been a big xkcd junkie for years (an occupational hazard of working in the software industry, which I do when I'm not writing about cars) and I don't need much of an excuse to push Randall Munroe's work on others. Here's the comic in its entirety; thanks to Fej for the tip:



[xkcd]

5. Perpendicular Parking

Who needs a Smart Fortwo for easy metropolitan parking when you've got the highly tuned parking genius that this numb nut driver portrays.

4. Get Out of My Spot, B****!

See, truTV may call this one of the five worst parking jobs, but this seems more to us like one of the best. This woman takes no prisoners in her attempt to get the parking spot. We have to admire that level of can-do attitude.

3. Neutral State

Heading to the gas station to get a few gallons for his summer landscaping job, Mr. Shortland is just your typical, hard working college student. Drunk, high and/or just absentminded. Look out below!

2. Come Back Here!

We typically support our local law enforcement, but this cop deserves to be the butt of all jokes until... well, forever. We bet if he had double chocolate frosted donuts in the car he would run just a wee bit faster.

1. Just a Little Joke

This little joke turns out to be an awesome comedic performance featuring one blown up beer; one goofy yellow car; one super rare, real life double take; and a little ass-dragging behind said goofy yellow car.
[via truTV]

International Full Size Jeep Association member, rixcj, doesn't have to be ashamed anymore when his wife calls on him to make a late night tampon run to the store, knowing full well that he'll be able to use those little cotton pops for his own leaks. He had just completed a full rebuild of a 1989 AMC 360 engine for his 1979 Jeep CJ5 when he found a nasty little oil leak dripping from the oil pump. Tired from the rebuild, he didn't feel like tearing the whole thing down to find out where he'd gone wrong, he made his own little fix with the help of a fabricated bracket and a tampon. (Hat Tip To LTDScott!) [via ifsja]

CNBC's Morning Joe co-host, Mika Brzezinski, didn't seem to catch the joke here. Was it because she was a woman in a room full of "pig men" or was it simply because she's "a blonde" as douchebag host, Joe Scarborough, put it?

Regardless, we know there are much, much worse vanity plates out there, evidenced by our top 50 list of vanity plates that slipped by the DMV. Colorado, if you're reading, take a peak at the old post and dammit, let the crazy vegan have her silly license plate or we'll send a KNUKL your way. (Hat Tip To Thomas!)

We're sure that the majority of these screwballs know what they're doing by now, since it's highly likely that they've completely ruined the vehicles that they've installed these welding nightmares to. Hey Murilee! You listening? Try and get all these guys set up on a team for the 24 Hours of LeMons! Can you see the golden safety cage and welded frame too?. I've got to go wash my eyes out with 15 gallon drum of Methylene Chloride Industrial Paint Stripper now, so feel free to post more disastrous results that you've come across in the comments below.

[via scoobynet, honda-tech]

We were prowling the interwebs and came across an old thread brought back to life by our good friends at The Car Lounge. So sit back, relax, kick your shoes off and enjoy the automotive motivational posters.

If you're feeling saucy enough today, head over to diy.despair and make some of your own and paste them up in the comments section.

Don't you feel better already? We know we do.

[via TCL]

Fart Med Motor Revy was initially published in Sweden during the Fifties and Sixties and, according to our trusted Google translator, it literally translates to: "speed with the engine revy." Could it have been run by Nordic coffee shop vikings? We might need a Jalop to sniff around to confirm this, but we'll believe it was until we smell hear otherwise. There are old copies available on numerous auction sites, but a lack of true info has left us feeling pretty shitty.

We know it's a little on the Beavis and Butthead side of things, but this was just to good to...uh ...pass up.
[via Corvette Blogger, Tradera]

You've got to love the quirky editing, Initial D soundtrack and the utter ridiculousness of the Changan delivery truck. I'll be traveling to Shanghai in a couple of weeks and can't wait to run into this eccentric crowd on the streets.

[via ChinaSmack]

The Chevy/Holden/Opel/Vauxhall AmperVolt? Meh. There couldn't be a better green car for the environmentally responsible crowd to be smug about than the electric ZR1. It's so electric, it'll send a jolt to the competition with uninterrupted green performance thanks to its optional 6-mile long extension cord. Pick one up today at your local Hangin' Byathread Motors. We'll be picking one up soon with the dual-speed, performance Makita Power Exhaust system. It's gonna be badass.

[Vette Collections via YouTube]

This little guy is so full of win, it's not even funny.

[via YouTube]

Doesn't anyone pay attention to their load height anymore? Thankfully, for purposes of our entertainment, they don't, as evidenced in this slightly moronic clip.

[via YouTube]

Now if only the U.S. advertisers could get away with something as bold as this. Created by Exclam Comunicação out of Curitiba, Brazil, these ads play right on the line of being funny and distasteful. And if you know us; that's exactly what we like. We found another, but we're not so sure it's funny — more sad and worrisome: therapistfinder.com

[via ads of the world]

Ireland's most dastardly of drivers is a man known only as "Prawo Jazdy." Mr. Jazdy's wanted for countless driving infractions across the Irish countryside. You'd think someone would be able to catch him, right? Wrong. Each time Mr. Prawo Jazdy was pulled over he not only gave police a different address, he gave them a different alias.

Eventually a call was put out to find and arrest the country's most reckless driver using each and every one of his supposed 50 aliases. A wise office worker for one of the Irish police precincts noticed something a little unusual about his name and did a quick little Google search to confirm her suspicions and low and behold, she was right.

You see, Prawo Jazdy was not the man-in-question's name. In fact, it wasn't the name of a man at all. Instead — their the words emblazoned atop the scofflaws' ID. Yup, it was Polish for "Driver's License." All along, Irish police who thought this reckless driver was constantly outwitting them with a new alias, were really the ones out-witting themselves.

The office worker who found the mistake had this to say:

"Having noticed this, I decided to check and see how many times officers have made this mistake. It is quite embarrassing to see that the system has created Prawo Jazdy as a person with over 50 identities."

The lesson that we've all learned from this is that if you're a habitual speeder, head to Ireland, because you'll never get caught.

That is, until the keg runs out.

(Hat Tip To Stoatmaster!)

[via BBC News]

ThinkDaddy

Our friends at adsoftheworld found this ad for the South African VW Caravelle (EuroVan), but they don't have much of an explanation behind this strange image either.

If we were to take a guess, we'd image the Basset Hound thinking:

What the hell's that smell? Smells like...sniff ... sniff ... s#!t. Oh....wait, that's just the Routan minivan.

Sorry VW, the Routan really sucked.

On a side note, Adsoftheworld has some pretty good comment warfare going on based on this ad, resulting in the firing of an art director from another firm. Ouch.

[via adsoftheworld]

It's been said that The Stig is really Ben Collins, Barack Obama, Sir Tom McKillop and a slew of others.


Unfortunately The Stig was rather quiet, but we did pick this up from his incessant finger tapping:

(Hat Tip To Arman!)

[top gear via motorward]

In all actuality, this entertaining clip was put together by the guys over at ElectricAid.org as a humorous response to Top Gear's controversial Tesla Roadster review. This time it involves hooning a Th!nk across an ice-covered expanse.

A classic from the video:

The the narrator, Greg Pope asked: Is it possible to have sex in this car?

"It would be very capable of having sex in this car, if you would like to do so," says test driver, Børre; "but being that all the walls are filled with windows giving nice view and also creating a very open atmosphere, you will be spotted. but the space is there so dooo whatever you want to doooo."

'Nuff said.

[via ElectricAid.org]

[via streetfire, youtube]

If you need some tips on how to prepare your car (why haven't you already??) then check out our earlier post on how to winterize your car.

[youtube via topspeed]