Dear Jalopnik,

I went to the local scrap yard the other day to look for parts to restore my 1977 Daihatsu F20, and I found these amazing autos just lying there unappreciated!

I had to send send you the pics, the cars are truly spectacular!

Regards,

Rashid Al-Mohannadi,
Long time reader, first time contributor

Very cool Rashid, and thanks for the images. We spy an Audi 80, a Hummer H1, a tragically burnt Bentley with a mechanically intact engine begging for a new home and other goodies. Both the doorless, lifted Cadillac DeVille and that high-rise intake wearing Camaro are just begging for some serious desert hoonery.

It was little more than half-a-century ago the armies of Rome, Berlin and Tokyo were defeated by Detroit's "Arsenal of Democracy" equipped by American carmakers. Yet to hear it lately from conservatives and leaders in the Republican Party, American automakers are what's wrong with this country, should be boycotted, and go bankrupt.

Senator John McCain told reporters that we should have never bailed out Chrysler and GM and let them go under.

"No, I don't think we ever should have bailed out Chrysler and General Motors," McCain told The Detroit News. "We should have let them go into bankruptcy, emerge and become viable corporations again."

This, of course, while he was out drumming up support for his 2010 Senate run while serving as the grand marshal of a NASCAR event where the very good ol' boys he was drumming up support from were watching Chrysler and GM products race. And, as The Detroit News points out, we did let them go into bankruptcy. We're still waiting to find out whether they'll emerge as stronger companies.

Confusingly, McCain seems to be channeling John Kerry in being for the bailout before he was against it. Now, of course, he's going so far as to refer to it as "Socialism."

And just this weekend RNC Chairman Michael Steele responded to the news of GM going further in debt by pointing out this statement:

"Today's release of General Motors' financial results is further proof that President Obama's economic experiments are wrong for America."

Of course, GM lost $4.2 billion in the third-quarter last year so this is actually an improvement, of sorts. And GM also announced they'd be repaying loans ahead of schedule.

So who do the Republicans like? At last year's Detroit Auto Show we had a conversation with Senator Bob Corker, the Republican who lead the charge against the bailout, and he talked about the Volkswagens he loves. Not a surprise given VW is joining Nissan in building a huge plant in his state.

In fact, there have been a number of foreign car companies moving better-than-minimum-wage assembly plants into states represented by Republican senators, including BMW in South Carolina, Toyota in Texas, Nissan/VW in Tennessee, and Mercedes-Benz and Hyundai in Alabama. Of course, we can't blame the Chrysler-Fiat "Global Strategic Alliance" alliance on the Republican party.

So when the far right goes to Boycott GM they're doing so for the benefit of companies like Volkswagen and Toyota, who have both surpassed GM as the world's largest automaker in the last year.

Ironically, this is the same Republican party upset about the Chinese purchase of Hummer. As Republican Representative Duncan Hunter told the Wall Street Journal: "Any money that is going to China or to Chinese companies is contributing in some way to China's military buildup."

So supporting American car companies is socialism and supporting every other country's investments in production capacity is capitalism and therefore good for America.

But hey, the Germans, Japanese, Chinese and Italians are our friends so who says we need any domestic car production or car companies? Of course, we're probably just paranoid. Maybe the real reason the Republicans hate GM and Chrysler is just that they really like Ford.

Photo Credit: DiggerHistory

Hummer brand CEO Jim Taylor, speaking with Automotive News, discussed Hummer's rather hazy future. Though the sale has not yet been finalized, the agreements are in place to sell the brand to Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery for $150 million, while that doesn't include any kind of manufacturing capacity, it does have a good deal of intellectual property in the transaction. GM will be providing contract manufacturing of the current Hummer brand products until the negotiated contract ends, but it's up to Tengzhong, Hummer, and Jim Taylor to work out a plan after that.

Currently Hummer is working with Austrian consulting firm AVL to determine a future path for brand and product lineup. The idea is to continue pushing the brand smaller, lighter, and more environmentally friendly. That includes the introduction of the smaller-than-the-H3 Hummer H4 and after that an apparently microscopic Hummer H5. The H4 will be based on the HX concept car and may include a hybrid drive system to push fuel economy up to respectable levels.

More daunting than working out Hummer's product plan is laying out a production system including manufacturing and engineering capacities, supply chains and the like. Essentially, once GM production ceases on the current H2 and H3, Hummer will be starting with a seven bar grille and a name synonymous with gas-guzzling behemoths. Tengzhong has promised to spend big on Hummer with increased production and a wad of advertising cash to re-tool the brand's image, but still, it'll be an uphill battle. Best of luck with all that, Mr. Taylor. [AutoNews (sub req.) via Hummer Guy]

If you think you can do better than these eight, drop the names/images into the comments as if they were your drawers.

8.) Vehicle: Nissan Homy Super Long
What It Suggests: Being well-equipped for any journey.
Use It In A Sentence: Women go crazy for a Homy Super Long man.

7.) Vehicle: Dodge Ram
What It Suggests: Forceful love making.
Use It In A Sentence: He put the tailgate down and gave me the full Ram.

6.) Vehicle: Audi TT-S
What It Suggests: Only Ze Germans could make a breast reference more efficient.
Use It In A Sentence: He was pleasantly surprised by the size of her TT-S.

5.) Vehicle: Ford Escort
What It Suggests: You're guaranteed to have a good time with an Escort, but you'll pay for it.
Use It In A Sentence: That Escort gave me crabs.

4.) Vehicle: Mazda Scrum Wagon
What It Suggests: A cleaning device used at a strip bar.
Use It In A Sentence: Cleaning out the Scrum Wagon is totally Charley work.

3.) Vehicle: Hummer
What It Suggests: To quote the poet: a handy would certainly be dandy, but if you want to know me then....
Use It In A Sentence: Arnold Schwarzenegger was a big proponent of the Hummer in the 1990s.

2.) Vehicle: Dodge Magnum
What It Suggests: It's the BIGGEST of the LX-platform vehicles.
Use It In A Sentence: I'm not sure if his Magnum will fit in my parking space.

1.) Vehicle: Ford Probe
What It Suggests: We come in peace, but we still want to know what's going on in there.
Use It In A Sentence: Spend all day with a Probe and your back will fall asleep as well.

We've picked out four of the five fav's over at Inhabitat, you'll have to go peak at their list to find out the last, cheeky entry, but we've dropped in the basics on each so click "Next" to learn more. [Inhabitat]

The Solar Black Bear" is an EV project at the University of Maine and plugs into the wall for a complete charge but also uses a rack-mounted solar array to extend its range out to about 100 miles.

VW Bugs and Earth friendliness would seem to go hand-in-hand, but the original bug wasn't exactly catalyzed and clean. This particular example on the other hand is emissions free and runs on a 12V electrical system, it even retains a four speed manual transmission. The best part? It's owned by Manitou High School in Colorado Springs, and is used for driver's ed training.

The stretched H1 limo gets its green cred by operating on a combination of biodiesel, electric power generated by a solarvoltaic array on the roof and a solid waste gassifier. Probably needs to be stretched just to fit all the equipment on board.

The '65 Impala Super Sport is an interesting case of modern engine meets awesome ride. Unbelievably, car was built by MTV's Pimp My Ride and got a Chevy Durmax diesel tuned run on biodiesel and snorting out 800 HP and 1200 lb-ft of torque. It'll go 0-60 in 3.5 seconds and gets double the fuel economy it used to. Unfortunately, they also reworked the interior.

Earlier reports were Tengzhong wanted Hummer to eventually have a manufacturing plant in China and a dedicated dealer network there, which Hummer doesn't have today. But, Hummer is expected to keep its headquarters and current manufacturing in the U.S., as well as its current management and engineering teams.

For those fearing the rapidly expanding industrial might of China transforming into building our own military vehicles for us, keep in mind the transaction won't include Hummer-related military technology or military truck production currently managed by Mishawaka, Ind.-based AM General. Good luck crushing those fears in the mind of every red-blooded 'merican male who bought a Hummer from GM since they bought the rights to sell civvie-versions a decade ago and who's now seeing the company sell the brand to a company that they think is named after a type of Chinese food. [PickupTrucks]

Photo Credit: Scott Olson / Getty Images News

The leaked memo was translated from Chinese by 163.com and offers part of the details behind the deal currently working behind the scenes.

1. Tengzhong will buy the intellectual property rights, including the trademark, patent right and other contents of Hummer;
2. Tengzhong will take over the sales network of Hummer;
3. After the acquisition, Tengzhong will operate the Hummer's business via an offshore company;
4. Before 2012, Hummer vehicles will continue to be manufactured by GM, who will also provide all-around technical services;
5. Before 2012, Tengzhong will launch the new H3 and new H4 (CUV models);
6. The [Hummer] marketing maintenance and R&D (research and development) will not be stopped.

In this version of the conditions, should the sale be approved Tengzhong will take control of all intellectual property, marketing and R&D resources, the dealer network, and most interestingly will produce the next versions of the Hummer H3 and a new product, the H4 CUV by 2012. The H4 CUV is expected to be the production version of the HX Concept, which the Hummer off-roading community has been begging for since its unveiling. [Hummer Guy]

It's almost like rule 34 of the internet, if a marketing hobo imagines a clever thing, someone, somewhere will replicate it in real life. Such is the case here with the Happy Jack Hummer, or, as the builder/owner would like for it to be know as, the "Dummer", it's built on 90's-era Chevy S10 chassis and uses all the finest in plywood veneer's to attain that popular Hummer look. But be careful potential buyer, this creation comes with some pitfalls, such as the infamous "ran when parked" status, which could mean anything from mint condition to rat-eaten wiring with petrified bearing grease, good luck with that. It's supposedly an "off-road vehicle," but it's more like a parade vehicle for your goofy old neighbor down the street.

Here's the original "Happy Jack" ad, just in case you forgot. (Hat tip to Chad!)

[eBay]

The Ethicist asks "instead of selling this massive, ecologically destructive gas guzzler, should G.M. have it sent to the scrap heap?" Hmm, it must be nice to be making such arguments working for a company that prints things on ecologically destructive paper. [Ethicist]

Photo Credit: Scott Olson / Getty Images

The fine folks at China Car Times hit the Chinese autoweb, the only place you're likely to hear honest and unfiltered opinions from average Chinese citizens, to gauge reaction to the purchase of Hummer by Sichuan Tengzhong.

Some of the opinions sound fairly similar to what many in the American auto-verse are saying about the value of the brand for a company no one has ever heard of:

— "This deal will most certainly loose(sic) money"
— "Hummer branding maybe worth 1 billion, but can it be made it back?"
— "What does China lack the most? Its not technology, its branding. Technology needs one generation, craftwork takes three generations, but branding takes generations of history to build."

Others take a different approach, mirroring typical American views of Chinese involvement in the U.S. economy:

— "So we've sent more money to the USA?"
— "Oh! Really sad! Why are other countries brands worth so much? Why do Chinese people like to buy in foreign goods? Look at history, which Chinese brands were successful?"

Our favorite reaction, though, comes from people who like to make fun of people from Sichuan and their spending habits:

— "What are you doing buying rubbish? Sichuan people have too much money."

Sichuan is considered the "province of abundance" with the rest of China viewing the province in the same way people in the rest of greater L.A. view Beverly Hills.

For more reactions check out China Car Times.

The NYT source is a person familiar with the Chinese government approval process who claims the Sichuan Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery Company Ltd., based in Chengdu, concluded the agreement with G.M.

Sichuan Tengzhong is a privately owned company, but Tuesday's deal required preliminary vetting by Beijing officials, who retain the right to veto any attempt at an overseas acquisition by a Chinese company and who give special attention to deals over $100 million.

Well, at least we now know it's probably a deal worth over $100 million.

We also expected it was probably a foreign company looking to buy Hummer, considering the news our friends at PickupTrucks.com reported earlier today that the deal prohibits the export of military technology of any sort with the buyer. So don't worry, your secret non-military but vital for Big Gulp cupholder technology won't compromise our national security.

But our biggest question is this — remember when we were on The Colbert Report last year? Remember the Hummer fans they visited? We wonder how many of them will be interested in buying a Hummer from a Chinese-owned company or will be slapping a "Better Red Than Dead" bumper sticker to the back of their current HumVee look-a-like? Probably not so many. [via NYT]

General Motors Announces Preliminary Agreement To Sell HUMMER

Deal could secure more than 3,000 jobs in the United States; preserves HUMMER as global off-road brand

DETROIT, June 2, 2009 – General Motors Corp. (NYSE: GM), announced it has entered into a memorandum of understanding (MoU) with a buyer for HUMMER, its premium off-road brand. This transaction is the result of GM's strategic review of the HUMMER brand and the company's ongoing restructuring efforts.

The sale is expected to close by the end of third quarter of this year and is subject to customary closing conditions, including receipt of applicable regulatory approvals.

The deal is expected to secure more than 3,000 U.S. jobs in manufacturing, engineering and at HUMMER dealerships around the country. The transaction also includes plans by the investor to aggressively fund future HUMMER product programs. Under terms of the MoU, the identity of the purchaser and proposed financial terms of the agreement are not being released at this time.

"HUMMER is a strong brand," said Troy Clarke, President of GM North America. "I'm confident that HUMMER will thrive globally under its new ownership. And for GM, this sale continues to accelerate the reinvention of GM into a leaner, more focused, and more cost-competitive automaker."

As part of the proposed transaction, HUMMER will continue to contract vehicle manufacturing and business services from GM during a defined transitional time period. For example, under the proposed agreement, GM's Shreveport Assembly plant would continue to contract assemble the H3 and H3T through at least 2010.

"GM has developed HUMMER into a globally recognized off-road brand," said James Taylor, HUMMER chief executive officer. "The proposed agreement will enable us to continue that growth and maximize the brand's potential through new, innovative off-road vehicles with improved efficiency and alternative fuel powertrains. Today's announcement is great news for HUMMER's current and future customers, dealers, suppliers and employees around the globe."

Other terms and conditions specific to the sale are not being disclosed at this time. Citi acted as financial advisor to General Motors Corporation.

About GM - General Motors Corp. (NYSE: GM), one of the world's largest automakers, was founded in 1908, and today manufactures cars and trucks in 34 countries. With its global headquarters in Detroit, GM employs 235,000 people in every major region of the world, and sells and services vehicles in some 140 countries. In 2008, GM sold 8.35 million cars and trucks globally under the following brands: Buick, Cadillac, Chevrolet, GMC, GM Daewoo, Holden, Hummer, Opel, Pontiac, Saab, Saturn, Vauxhall and Wuling. GM's largest national market is the United States, followed by China, Brazil, the United Kingdom, Canada, Russia and Germany. GM's OnStar subsidiary is the industry leader in vehicle safety, security and information services. More information on GM can be found at www.gm.com.

Forward-Looking Statements - In this press release and in related comments by our management, our use of the words "plan," "expect," "anticipate," "ensure," "promote," "believe," "improve," "intend," "enable," "continue," "will," "may," "would," "could," "should," "project," "positioned" or similar expressions is intended to identify forward-looking statements that represent our current judgment about possible future events. We believe these judgments are reasonable, but these statements are not guarantees of any events or financial results, and our actual results may differ materially due to a variety of important factors. Among other items, such factors might include: our ability to comply with the requirements of our credit agreement with the U.S. Treasury; our ability to execute the restructuring plans that we have disclosed, our ability to maintain adequate liquidity and financing sources and an appropriate level of debt; the ability of our foreign subsidiaries to restructure and receive financial support from their local governments or other sources; our ability to restore consumers' confidence in our viability and to continue to attract customers, particularly for our new products; our ability to sell, spin-off or phase out some of our brands, to manage the distribution channels for our products, and to complete other planned asset sales; and the overall strength and stability of general economic conditions and of the automotive industry, both in the U.S. and globally.

We've only ever seen this level of insane skill before in the basement-built Lamborghini Countach of Ken Imhoff, but craftsmanship and the mid-level insanity of the builders is all these vehicles share. This H1 isn't some surplus rebuild or fiberglass kit, it's all-steel, hand fabricated to a near-military spec level of quality. The frame comes from a rough 1987 F150 4x4, the rear axle was pulled out of a E250 van, the engine is a monster 7.3 liter Powerstroke diesel from a shuttle van, and pretty much everything else is the result of a press-brake and and whole lot of welding. The result has been dubbed the Hummer H150.

We were a little worried, about half-way through the 48 pages of forum details on FullSizeBronco.com where he admitted his wife would be given the choice of paint scheme and she picked out a two tone white and grey with a tribal line in the middle. Thankfully she came to her senses and a lovely orange was chosen instead. Though the truck isn't quite done yet, a whole lot of the major work is through. The body electronics just got the test and transmission has been sourced, so after buttoning up the powertrain it'll be ready for a maiden run. This build has taken some five years thus far, but considering how far this guy has come the last few steps are practically child's play.

There aren't many vehicles manlier than the original Hummer H1, but building your own from scratch puts you in rare company on the testosterone scale. We can't wait to see how the Hummer H150 turns out. Hat tip to Mike! [Full Size Bronco Forums]