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Detroit, 11:05 PM
Wed Nov 11
31 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #howtosexyyourcar more →

    11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Tanshanomi Tanshanomi
    12/05/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    The epic win (okay, actually the only win) for #6 was the Polaris Revolver street ATV. The iPod is the instrument panel.

     Reply
    Tanshanomi was starred Tanshanomi was unstarred
    Image of BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    With these guidelines it has become so easy to make a new car that the The Not So Big Three can have a new production car ready before Christmas.
     Reply
    BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ was starred BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ was unstarred
    Image of bzr bzr
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    You forgot #12: If you're GM, give Michael Bay lots of money to put it in his movies, promote the shit out of it, tout it as the car that will save the company, then delay it until your children open up retirement funds for themselves, by which time it'll be thoroughly disappointing and forgotten.
     Reply
    bzr was starred bzr was unstarred
    Image of ormstungu ormstungu
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    Or, in Chrysler's case, it is only 3 steps:


    Step 1: take a steaming turd


    Step 2: paint it orange, add stripes, call it "SRT"


    Step 3: use said be-striped, orange SRTurd as "halo" to attempt to sell other, duller turds

     Reply
    ormstungu was starred ormstungu was unstarred
    Image of stoke stoke
    12/04/08

    @ormstungu: Duller turds must retain huge fenders of SRTurd, but use tiny wheels and taller ride height to ruin stance.
     Reply
    stoke was starred stoke was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    12/04/08

    @stoke: And the fenders must be unpainted grey plastic, while the wheels, generally steel, must have the cheapest looking hubcaps available.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    Matt, this is one of the best articles I've seen in a while. The sarcasm and cynicism intertwined with truthiness and accuracy at pointing out the painfully obvious is frankly brilliant.


    There's a fellow in Toronto who has followed these tips to the letter with his custom-built Corrado. He designed and produced his own front bumper and skirts. Hand-fabricated a magnificent set of headlights based on the previous-gen Audi A4. Revamped all the switchgear and displays inside. Hand-fabricated his own stainless-steel and leather steering-wheel. Re-skinned and modified the stock seats.


    It looks fantastic, and ended up looking like the difference between a concept car and the production version.


    I would have added, "12. Follow cues from the hot-rod/aftermarket crowd: chopped tops, lower stance, wide-body mods, custom exhausts and chromed engines."

     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of Paul Y. don't drive too fast. Paul Y. don't drive too fast.
    12/04/08

    @Deartháir: Your step twelve shall be known from now on as the SEMA Corollary to the 11 easy steps to making a concept car.
     Reply
    Paul Y. don't drive too fast. was starred Paul Y. don't drive too fast. was unstarred
    Image of RegalRegalia RegalRegalia
    12/04/08

    do you have a link for that car on which you drool?
     Reply
    RegalRegalia was starred RegalRegalia was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    12/04/08

    @regalregalia: The guy runs Dub Design Industries, and has a bunch of photos hosted on his website there... unfortunately I can't access it from work to pick one out for you.
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    12/04/08

    @Paul Y. can't think of a better, shorter handle: I keep thinking of Jaguar's C-XF to XF transition. Seen apart, apart from the headlights they look so much alike you find yourself going, "Why is the concept so much sexier?"


    Put them side-by-side, and you see that's what it is. Lower stance, wider flanks, chopped top, sexier exhaust tips. I'm frankly surprised that SEMA didn't feature an XF that was converted back to C-XF specs.

     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of Matt Hardigree Matt Hardigree
    12/04/08

    @Deartháir: Thanks, do you have a link or a picture of that Corrado?
     Reply
    Matt Hardigree was starred Matt Hardigree was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    12/04/08

    @Matt Hardigree: I can't see them, but I found some images through sneaky other means.




    I haven't been really active in the Corrado community since I found some car blog online that seems to occupy my time, so maybe he's done some changes since then, but it was quite nice, clean, simple work.

     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of ScapeGoat ScapeGoat
    12/04/08

    @Deartháir: Do not want.

    The front bar seems to be an E46 M3 rip-off, and it looks like he's stuck some A4 headlight shells on it with new innards. oh, wait...


    And those lower lights are too damn big.

     Reply
    ScapeGoat was starred ScapeGoat was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    12/05/08

    @ScapeGoat: Hahahaha... you've picked on some of the few parts he left stock. And yes, they are A4-based headlights. Problem is, the front of a Corrado is flat, the front of an A4 is curved. It's little things like that that look simple and uncomplicated, but when you actually look into it are mind-numbingly complex.
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of Novaload Novaload
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    Well done, Matt. It the hilarious but sadly true category.

    I'll write the two ream press release that must accompany each one.


    "We've met the enemy, and he is us. No, wait! I mean, we've met the future. And it's brilliant!"

     Reply
    Novaload was starred Novaload was unstarred
    Image of Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage!
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    Did comments just die? I can't reply to anything...
     Reply
    Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was starred Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was unstarred
    Image of Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage!
    12/04/08

    @Gearhead_42: nevermind
     Reply
    Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was starred Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was unstarred
    Image of Dr. H. F. Danger Dr. H. F. Danger
    12/04/08

    @Gearhead_42: I can't reply to anything either.
     Reply
    Dr. H. F. Danger was starred Dr. H. F. Danger was unstarred
    Image of Graverobber Graverobber
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    One more thing,


    Make the production version nothing like the show car



     Reply
    Graverobber was starred Graverobber was unstarred
    Image of SpeedWagon SpeedWagon
    12/04/08

    @graverobber- My Yugo Nova!:



     Reply
    SpeedWagon was starred SpeedWagon was unstarred
    Image of Graverobber Graverobber
    12/04/08

    @SpeedWagon - Now in Classic view!:




     Reply
    Graverobber was starred Graverobber was unstarred
    Image of SpeedWagon SpeedWagon
    12/04/08

    @graverobber- My Yugo Nova!:
     Reply
    SpeedWagon was starred SpeedWagon was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    12/04/08

    @SpeedWagon - Needs COTD bailout.:


    I am now psychologically scarred for the remainder of my life.

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Plecostomus [Tyrrell] Plecostomus [Tyrrell]
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    "If the concept is hip and urban make sure the model looks like she'd give you the clap."


    That's not just hilarious, but incredibly true.

     Reply
    Plecostomus [Tyrrell] was starred Plecostomus [Tyrrell] was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    12/04/08

    @Plecostomus - Now with 20% more Algae!: She's got the Jack!
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    You forgot the buzzword-laden press release keying into whatever trend is cool this year.
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of adamaoc adamaoc
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    then change everything and make it look boring!
     Reply
    adamaoc was starred adamaoc was unstarred
    Image of FiveLiters FiveLiters
    12/04/08

    @adamaoc: And that's the reason no one is buying today's cars...they always waste your time showing you a cool 'concept',then the production vehicle is...'yawn'.
     Reply
    FiveLiters was starred FiveLiters was unstarred
    Image of Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est
    12/05/08

    @FiveLiters: I thought that the whole point of this Article was that the concepts are lame as well.
     Reply
    Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was starred Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was unstarred
    Image of Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage!
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    OK, pet peeve of mine... tires mount on wheels and not the other way around... "Giant Wheels on Hand Cut Tires" just sounds dumb
     Reply
    Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was starred Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was unstarred
    Image of Matt Hardigree Matt Hardigree
    12/04/08

    @Gearhead_42: fair enough.
     Reply
    Matt Hardigree was starred Matt Hardigree was unstarred
    Image of Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage!
    12/04/08

    @Matt Hardigree: I love you man! :-D
     Reply
    Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was starred Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage! was unstarred
    Image of Matt Hardigree Matt Hardigree
    12/04/08

    @Gearhead_42: Right back at ya.
     Reply
    Matt Hardigree was starred Matt Hardigree was unstarred
    Image of Serious Mopar Jones- Incurable Serious Mopar Jones- Incurable
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    Eleven is the new 10?


    Volvo is Swedish.


    Also, no bubbletop, joystick, fins, or fake turbine-intake nose? Fail.


     Reply
    Serious Mopar Jones- Incurable was starred Serious Mopar Jones- Incurable was unstarred
    Image of Matt Hardigree Matt Hardigree
    12/04/08

    @Slantsick- on layaway at SPATULA CITY: Ah yes, Volvo is Swedish. We've updated the joke. thanks.
     Reply
    Matt Hardigree was starred Matt Hardigree was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    12/04/08

    @Matt Hardigree: Do the Swedes love Baywatch?
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of Matt Hardigree Matt Hardigree
    12/04/08

    @Mad_Science: apparently they do.
     Reply
    Matt Hardigree was starred Matt Hardigree was unstarred
    Image of AmishJohn AmishJohn
    12/04/08

    I think Slantsick- on layaway at SPATULA CITY's picture has given Nibbles a coronary.
     Reply
    AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred
    Image of Dr. H. F. Danger Dr. H. F. Danger
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    You forgot a step:

    Leak tons of obscure/dark photos with features and details that will never make the final model.
     Reply
    Dr. H. F. Danger was starred Dr. H. F. Danger was unstarred
    Image of Jagvar Jagvar
    12/04/08

    In reply to 11 Easy Steps To Design A "Concept" Car
    You forgot razor-thin side mirrors.
     Reply
    Jagvar was starred Jagvar was unstarred
    Image of Paul Y. don't drive too fast. Paul Y. don't drive too fast.
    12/04/08

    @Jagvar: Don't forget to omit the windshield wipers!
     Reply
    Paul Y. don't drive too fast. was starred Paul Y. don't drive too fast. was unstarred
    Image of Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est
    12/05/08

    @Paul Y. can't think of a better, shorter handle: I guess that a simple step 12 would suffice:


    "Leave out any practical but unsightly parts, or make them so tiny that they'd be entirely useless"

     Reply
    Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was starred Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was unstarred
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