Jalopnik: Germany

PCH, Franco-Prussian War Rematch Edition: Citroen CX 2000 or Porsche 928?

Murilee Martin — Thu, 01 May 2008 17:20:00 EDT

In a stunning upset, the Borgward Hansa wagon handed Germany a one-sided victory over the Peugeot 304 in our most recent Choose Your Eternity poll. With France long reigning as the world's lone HyperGalactic PCH OmniPower, we would be remiss if we didn't give the French a shot at prying the oil-leaking, stripped-fastener-thread PCH CryptoChampion trophy from the Germans, in order to prove that the Borgward's victory wasn't just some one-shot fluke. That's why we're rolling out some Hell Project heavy artillery today, with a pair of undeniably cool- yet just as undeniably nightmarish- machines vying for long-term residency in your Garage Of Torture.

It wouldn't be fair to break out the H-bomb of French Hell Projects (the Citröen SM), because we're fairly certain that nothing on the planet can beat the SM in a Project Car Hell matchup. But how about the Citröen CX? The early CX has many of the features that made the SM so wonderful and terrible, but with the added bonus of having been manufactured by a company in complete financial shambles (and with the involvement of both the French and Italian governments). So head on down to lovely Plant City, Florida, and hand over $2,500 for this 1975 Citröen CX 2000 (go here if the ad disappears). The seller doesn't mention anything about mechanical condition, because it's totally unnecessary; you know this car doesn't run! All we get from the seller is "4 cylinder cinline,its standard with red interior seats and holds up to five people," which leaves a whole lot to your darkest imagination. But maybe it will fire right up, the hydropneumatic suspension will leap to the proper height, and you'll roar off into the Plant City sunset with a Hell-free car experience... but that ain't the way to bet.

We all know that Porsche engineers don't compromise performance for any reason, including the sanity of the mechanics who will one day work on their cars. So if long-suffering (yet well-paid) wrenchmen Hans und Günter have to sweat out 72 hours of labor (using all manner of single-purpose, Porsche-only tools) in order to replace some tiny component buried beneath a fiendish labyrinth of impossible-to-reach fasteners... well, if that's the way to make the car perform 0.0019% better, that's exactly how Porsche will do it! And the 928 might be the purest expression of that philosophy, with its engine compartment completely packed with one of the most complicated V8s that ever made a veteran mechanic weep with frustration. And it's not just the engine- the whole car is a lunatic monkeypuzzle, and it will drive you mad. Of course, all is forgiven when you actually get to drive your 928, but getting an affordable one to that point takes some work. Nothing you can't handle, though... right? Right! So come on out to Redding, California, and peel off twelve Benjamins for this running, driving '81 928 (go here if the ad disappears). Yes, just $1,200 for a running 928! It's not perfect; the seller admits that it "nees some luv." We can see evidence of some family strife in the car's description ("bought it to fix up with my boys but they think it is ugly i say they have no class, anyway here it is"), so here's your chance to swoop in and grab this jewel before the boys reconsider. Hey, did Porsche paint those wheels at the factory?

Unnamed German Luxury Automaker Creates Digital Factory System

Travis Hudson — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 15:20:00 EDT

A "luxury car manufacturer" from southern Stuttgart has invested a lot of money into something that isn't even real. We're thinking it was the brainchild of Dr. Z., but the unnamed company has picked up six of the ridiculously expensive Christie HD8K 1080p DLP high definition projectors that creates virtual factory floors and production plants to maximize production efficiency. It's quite the elaborate setup as individuals have to don special 3D goggles to get the full, stomach churning experience.

Will the elaborate setup have any affect on the buyers of the unnamed vehicles? More than likely not, but it's still a nice helper for planning out a lean manufacturing strategy. [Christie]

Europe Fires Caminoization Salvo: 500SEpage, Silver Shadowamino!

Murilee Martin — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 08:00:00 EDT

The Murfreesboro Vanden Plaschero inspired a lot of discussion about the pros/cons of Americans hacking up fine European machinery in order to add pick-em-up truck beds. Don't forget, though, that Europe itself has a fine tradition of Caminoization stretching back for many decades. Take, for example, this pair of fine Old World cartrucks. We've got a 1982 Mercedes-Benz 500SE with pickup bed from Germany and a 1977 Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow on a Dodge truck chassis from the Netherlands. Which would you drive? Make the jump and do the voting thing! Thanks to Martjin and Sasho for the tips.

Volkswagen's Command Center Is Like Minority Report, Minus The Cool

Travis Hudson — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 15:45:00 EDT

Recently installed at VW's Wolfsburg, Germany headquarters is this massive video wall that will help the IT control center manage all of VW's world-wide network. Remember in Minority Report when Tom Cruise is rocking that video wall with the awesome glove? Well, this system is kind of like that, but less technological and less cool. It does get the job done, apparently. The wall consists of tons of LCD displays and will ensures that stability of VW's worldwide networks across suppliers, importers, dealers, service partners, customers, manufacturers and more. What happened to being environmentally friendly, VW? We're sure this command center doesn't skimp on the power usage. [Carscoop]

Think You've Got It All? How About A Gold Porsche?

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 14:15:00 EST

We were born with an inability to trust salespeople, the fact they're trying to sell something you probably don't need is more than likely the root of this distrust. Fresh from Germany is a perfectly good example of something totally ludicrously ridiculous. The watch, jewelery, and interior decoration company of Schmuckwelten in Pforzheim, Germany has come up with a way to make a duo of Porsches seem utterly undesirable - cover them in gold and tchachkies. Is there something about an old 911 or a new Boxster that just screams "cover me with gold leaf" or "bedazzle my exhaust tip"? You'd think this kind of thing would be a hangin' offense in Germany. [Schmuckwelten via Minhaselecao]

German Confounds Us With Pontiac LeSupra

Ben Wojdyla — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 16:20:00 EST

The immediate reaction to this article sent to us by The Bouncer was an indignant cry of 'blasphemy!' What you see above is no ordinary 1972 Pontiac LeMans, indeed this dark horse has a dirty little secret. Tucked away under that sleek hood there lies no V8 engine, not even a V6, in fact, the engine wasn't even born in Detroit. It was plucked from none other than a Toyota Supra.

Under that familiar Pontiac skin which gave rise to the legendary Judge GTO's, rests a heart from the land of the rising sun, a 1991 Toyota Supra 7M-GTE 3.0 litre 24V turbo. The story goes that the car came to the builder as a basket case from an auction. Our hero/villain Ralf Becker decided it needed a new heart and a buddy helped him dig up the Toyota engine. That was apparently not without it's faults either, as valves and pistons had to be replaced (valve pics on Autobild are pretty beaten). The final piece of the pie, which seems to still be in the ironing out phase, is the addition of a great big turbocharger to really spice things up. We don't know if we can endorse this kind of madness, but the build is unique and will probably be pretty quick when all is said and done. That said, we're going to keep an eye on these guys, you never know what kind of shenanigans those Germans are getting into. [via AutoBild.de (translated - poorly)]

Junkyard Find: Opel GT

Murilee Martin — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 10:00:00 EST

Seems every time I go to a certain East Oakland self-service junkyard, I find something old and unusual on its way to steelyard reincarnation. Last time it was the 1969 Jaguar XJ-6; now it's a very-well-picked-over 1973 Opel GT. These things were never plentiful in North America, and I don't think I've seen one on the street for a decade. Yet, somehow, one has survived long enough to make it to the junkyard. Make the jump for even more gallery shots.

The Old Elbe River Tunnel

Ben Wojdyla — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 14:30:00 EST

See, this is why we love Germany, no, it's not just for the beer. The city of Hamburg is situated on the Elbe river, with the dockyards situated on an island in the river. In the heady shipping days of Hamburg, workers on the busy port island had to travel by ferry to get to their jobs. In an effort to reduce river traffic and improve the commute, a tunnel was constructed to address the issue. Being Germans though, the tunnel couldn't just be a hole in the ground for people to pass through. Nope, this tunnel stretches out for 1,398 ft under the river, and is punctuated by huge freight elevators on both sides.

Hailed as a technological marvel, the tunnel opened for business in 1911. Featuring two 20 ft diameter tunnels 80 ft underground, the tunnels have matching elevators on both ends. The four elevators on either side are capable of carrying two cars at a time (or like fifteen if they're Smarts). While still in operation, the bulk of the traffic has shifted to more efficient bridges, but the tunnel is still used regularly by tourists and pedestrians. We want to see what a drag race down there would look like.

Parking Lot Saves German History

Ben Wojdyla — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 10:15:00 EST

Parking lots don't always pave paradise, sometimes the pave over cellars. German archaeologists have discovered a 12th century cellar buried under a car park in Berlin. The find dates the founding of the city to a period roughly 45 years earlier than previous estimates. What makes the discovery remarkable isn't so much it's age, but that it has survived through centuries of construction as well as the Allied bombardment in the second world war.

Previous records reconstructed from church registries placed the founding of Berlin around 1237, however carbon dating of timbers in the cellar reveal it may have been as early as 1192. See, parking lots aren't just horrible eye sores that blight the landscape, they're also preserving German history. [via Yahoo News]

Gaddafi's Offspring's Ferrari Seized In Germany For Being Too Loud

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 14:45:00 EST

The War on Terror-izingly Loud Autos claimed another victim as German police towed away Muammar Gaddafi's son's Ferrari 430. Seif al-Arab, son of the Libyan leader, is studying something in Munich and, like most students, gets by on a mixture of Ramen Noodles, Ultimate Frisbee and Italian sports cars. Police report that the car's exhaust emitted 110.5 decibels, over the 98 decibel limit.

Somehow, Seif is going to have to get together 100 pounds or else be forced to take the bus. He also may be driving on an invalid international license. This comes at a time when Libya has taken a more open stance towards its relations with Europe, including forking over $35 million in a settlement related to the Berlin Disco Bombings. Maybe he should have had them thrown in any future offspring's automotive crimes. [Telegraph]

Match Made in Heaven: Skoda Delivery Fun

bwojdyla — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 12:45:00 EST

You didn't think we could actually make it through any trip without bringing you local Camino action did you? Here's a bitchin' Skoda Felicia Fun doing its duty as a pizza delivery truck/car in Schesslitz. Way more dignified than the last Fun we brought you. Could there be a better match? Pizza delivery, Camino-ness, fuel economy, plenty of room for cases of bier in the back... it's perfect! There's something so right about that missing hubcap too. Ristorante bei Peppo Skoda-camino driver, today's real Bavarian hero.

Akl Shows Off 1974 BMW 2000Tii Touring

bwojdyla — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 15:00:00 EST

Earlier we introduced you to Akl's garage, now we're going to show you Akl's daily driver. Parked right in front of that bitching treasure chest is a 1974 BMW 2000Tii Touring. That's right the BMW boys built a touring model of the uber-tossable little sedan - sort of the German version of a shooting brake. While there are probably only about a hundred of these in all of Germany, Akl puts twenty thousand clicks on his, thumbing his nose at the namby pamby preservationist sissies. Putting on all those K's would seem like a tedious business given the stop-go and heavy truck traffic of the modern, EU border crossing free Autobahn. That's were Akl has a clever little trick up his sleeve. He has equipped it a 1600E Becker Mexico vintage modern stereo system. Yep, the one that looks old, but hides the CF and SD reader built into it. We can't help but wonder if this was the inspiration for that M Coupe that's perrenially on our list to Santa. Dig that copper paint job.

More German Garage Pr0n

bwojdyla — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 13:00:00 EST

Alexander "Akl" Z. is a man living what many of us would consider "the dream." He has a nice big house in the German countryside, not one, but two, two lift garages, a positive pressure paint booth, and more automotive treasures than you can shake a schweinebraten at. Keeping messy garages full of cool cars must be a German national pastime. Under the vintage black Mercedes is a competition ready BMW 2002 set up for hill climb racing. Against the back wall is an E21 set up for cup racing. Under the mint condition BMW 3.0 CSi is an old Escort destined for rally time. Another something sits in the middle of it all after a fresh paint job. It looks French, but that's highly doubtful in Germany, anybody know what that is? We especially dig the palm trees littering the garage, it makes things feel so exotic. We're used to the girly posters and smelly old dogs, but this works too.

Dieter Lets Us Peek Behind the Barn Door

bwojdyla — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 13:00:00 EST

A man like Dieter is never content with just one barn full of cars and tools and gadgets. Less than a kilometer away from his shop, Dieter has his treasure barn. From the road it's so unassuming that you'd never know it could contain an 850Ci and a 440 Duster. In addition to those, there's at least an ancient Tatra, a pumped up BMW 2002, the skeletal (and really cool) remains of an Opel Speedster and a rack of about 50 various hoods for some reason. This is also where Dieter keeps the molds for a BMW M1 that's he's recreating. Oh yeah, that wooden frame upside down on the red car, that's the body frame for the BMW 328 we told you about earlier. This level of chaos in our own garage would drive us bonkers, but damn, this place is awesome.

Legendary Project Car: 1937 BMW 328

bwojdyla — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 11:30:00 EST

Our German buddy, The Bouncer, was a garage rat growing up. We could clog the tubes with his stories of Deutschland hoonage in hypermodified BMWs and mythical Porsches. As a result of this, we've got the inside track on some of Bavaria's most respected garages and their automeisters. This particular fellow is Dieter W. His full name and location will remain anonymous for reasons that will become evident shortly. Dieter is a BMW guy. His garage services only the steel of the Bayerische Motoren Werk and he's got an unbelievable little secret in one of his work bays.

In his unassuming garage in the German country side, buried unter various parts boxes and old blankets, are the bits and pieces that make up one of 462 known worldwide examples of the original BMW 328 - the car that defined BMW's as ultimate driving machines in pre-war Germany. Built between 1936 and 1940, 328's won the Mille Miglia in '38 and the RAC Rally in '39. They were even in the running for the car of the century back at the end of the 1900's. These are some of the most sought after BMW's in the world. Ladies and gentlemen of the audience, please direct your attention to the gallery where you can see the car as it stands today. Would you believe us if we told you those parts are right now worth three hundred and fifty thousand Euro. Yeah, our jaws hit the floor too.

As you can see, the coach work is being painstakingly rebuilt from the ground up. All of that glimmering steel is hand worked to replace the lost or damaged. Each hammer stroke along the door frame can be seen, though only from the soon to be polished away scuff mark. The curve is smooth to the hand - planished to perfection. The manually rolled steel around the hood vent is so symmetrical it looks as if it just came off the press.

The engine (the one laying on its side, on a hand truck, under a blanket) was sourced from a technical school somewhere in Russia, and alone cost 25,000 Euro. Those are three original Solex carbs topped with steel mesh filters. Check out that cast aluminum radiator fan. So. Cool. We don't even know what to say more than that. Letting the pictures do the talking is about all we can do. How often do you fly into Germany and stare face to face with a legend being remade? Never, that's how often.

VW Golf Country Makes Tiguan Look Like Sissymobile

bwojdyla — Tue, 25 Dec 2007 14:00:00 EST

Oh sweet Christkindle, we've found VW's best car ever and it's called the VW Golf Country. Just as we were ~~being raped at the gas pump~~ filling up, the traffic cleared and this came into view across the street. You all should have been there to see the frantic scramble for the camera as we raced against the owners' intent to scramble with our new found love. Even though these picture make us feel like half private eye, half stalker, we can't help it; seeing this super rare, four wheel drive, Mark 2 Golf is like catching Sasquatch riding the Loch Ness monster like a big wet pony. We're loving the high res shots showing the bashed front fascia and busted up fender flares, the field repairs on the wiring, the chintzy 80's style decals, oh my, it's almost too much.

It's incredible that this car is dead stock, right down to the brush guard, but totally true. Apparently this was a very popular car with Germany's hunting population, which is both small, and insanely regulated. The little cars could get into and out of the Hinterlands without a problem and still return fantastic mileage. We're thinking US hunters would have a slightly different opinion of the car, probably involving a lot more laughter, but we still want to add it to our collection.

DOTS Germany: Supermini Substop Delivery Truck

bwojdyla — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 15:30:00 EST

Job one when we made our way into Bamberg on the first day was to replace the anemic and poorly appointed Mercedes B-Class rental (seriously, how does that thing wear a star?) with a far more capable and comfortable Audi A4 mit 2.0 TDi. While we were on this mission, we came across this spectacular beauty. Making kei-cars look like my Lincoln, this "Substop" delivery truck was like manna from bizarro heaven. We're pretty sure that it's worn as a backpack during delivery runs. The utter hoonage that could result from matching this with a Hayabusa mill and cheater slicks is unfathomable. They should be distributed in pairs, one for each pocket.

Jalopnik in Germany for Fun, Not Shows

bwojdyla — Mon, 24 Dec 2007 14:00:17 EST

While Jonny was being such a crybaby about the hanging out in lousy old California in Saturday's QOTD, I decided to go to Germany to escape the thirteen inches of snow that fell in good old D-town. You'll find the reasoning here is solid; After years of half-assed jokes about Germans and their preoccupation with automotive perfection, (as well as myriad poorly spelled jokes about various aluminum und schteel loving brands) it was decided that the time had come to check the place out in person. Sure, we've been all over the übershow that is Frankfurt, and we've shown you what comes out of Essen, but we've never really gotten to know Germany. It was mostly just a relationship of convenience where we never called the next day. This time we're serious, we're committed, we want to know all of Germany's friends and hang out in the cold drinking Gluhwein at the Weihnacht's Markt. Oh yeah, and completely geek out over the cars. Stay tuned for Deutschland-centric craziness.

BMW to Slash Thousands of Jobs in 2008

Ray Wert — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 10:45:00 EST

Ze German automaker BMW announced earlier today via a company spokesperson that it plans to cut thousands of jobs in 2008 to cut costs. Although the spokesperson won't say exactly how many thousands of jobs would be cut, but according to a report by Der Spiegelthey'll be slashing 8,000 of their 108,000 workers.

BMW is saying most of the cuts would come from the Deutschland, where the company employs around 80,000. Interestingly enough they've got between 6 and 8,000 temporary workers in Germany. Anyone want to make a bet who's losing their jobs? (Hat tip to David!) [via AP]

EU to Cede on US Demands to Drop Vehicle Emissions Targets?

Ray Wert — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 08:15:00 EST

So we're hearing negotiators at the United Nations climate talks in Bali agreed to U.S. demands, dropping specific targets on greenhouse-gas emissions from a draft document in order to salvage an agreement that will guide discussions on a global-warming treaty over the next two years. Specifically, the target changes were pushed by Germany. Hmm, we're thinking maybe there's an automaker twisting arms behind the scene. Our guess is in this round the score is: Porsche, 1. Gore, 0. Who's got next? (Hat tip to Brian W!) [Bloomberg]

Michael Schumacher Races Taxi to Airport

bwojdyla — Wed, 12 Dec 2007 15:45:00 EST

Wide World of Sports Australia is reporting on a taxicab drivers' tall tale that both thrills and delights. According to German cabbie Tuncer Yilmaz, Michael Schumacher was late to the airport after picking up a new puppy for the family, so he did what any self respecting racing god would do, take the wheel himself. In Yilmaz's own words:

"I found myself in the passenger seat, which was strange enough, but to have "Schumi" behind the wheel of my cab was incredible"... "He drove at full throttle around the corners and over-took in some unbelievable places."

For the granting him the pleasure of speedily transporting his wife and two kids, and his new pup, der Regenmeister tipped ye old cabbie a smooth hundred Euros. No small sum considering that's almost enough to buy a house in Detroit these days.[WWOS.co.au]

So You Want a Porsche 928amino?

Murilee Martin — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 11:00:00 EST

We saw a little bit about the six-wheeled Porsche 928 GTS pickup truck a couple years back, but now it becomes possible for us all to experience the full Stuttgart truckcar goodness, thanks to this German TV documentary.

Abt Audi AS5 turbodiesel ich bin Bat Guano

Jonny Lieberman — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 10:15:00 EST

A few months back we told you about the Abt AS5 which is a tweaked version of Audi's 3.0-liter TDI A5. Well guess what? They went even harder. Horsepower, originally up from 240 to 272 hp, is now an even 300 ponies. But the real news is the torque. Are you sitting down? Yeah? OK: 442 ft-lbs. of the stuff. From a 3.0-liter engine!! Wasn't it not long ago that heavy duty one-ton pickups stonked way, way less twist? All that torque shows up at 2,400 rpm, 60 mph happens in 5.3 seconds on the car's way to a 164 mph top speed. It always bears repeating: Americans buy horsepower but drive torque. Can we get some decent diesels over here, or what? [via Motor Authority]

A Highly Precise Speed Bump

Ray Wert — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 15:21:00 EST

Our gadget-obsessed brother site came across the following commercial for some German something or the other featuring an elderly Teuton showing off his highly precise speed bump he just invented on some Deutsch-bag racing down a country lane. Poor little Deutsch-bag. [via Gizmodo]

Blot Out Reality With a Mercedes-Benz!

Murilee Martin — Tue, 20 Nov 2007 14:00:00 EST

So you're this übermensch-y sorta chiseled blond dude stepping off an Air Tunis Ilyushin-62 in some sweaty clangorous Arab town, and the locals are screaming and there's this godawful wailing music, and you dislike it intensely. So, you go buy yourself a brand-new Mercedes-Benz. Problem solved! By the way, we think we should get Bonus Restraint Points here for not going off on a William S. Burroughs-style routine about purchasing slave boys.

Public Transit? Nein! Get a Beetle!

Murilee Martin — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 10:30:00 EST

You could be getting soaked at a bus stop that's colder than a Stalingrad winter, musing film-noirishly about your crimes and the lack of inner moral compass that led to your current state (not understanding German allows us to put noir interpretations on the protagonist's monologue)... or you could be crammed behind the wheel of a 36-horsepower machine equipped with a flower vase and rust-enhancing floorpans. What's it gonna be?

France at War With Germany... Over Car Emissions

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 11:00:00 EST

Europe is heating up over vehicle emissions (someone tell the Archduke of Austria to hide), and it's France on the offensive this time. A report recently came out detailing that while most European car companies were reducing emissions, German car emissions actually rose by 1.9%. Germany wants different limits for the heavier luxury cars it produces, compared to the smaller models produced in Italy, Spain, France and other countries.

The point the French are making is that the amount they make per small car is so low that a differentiated requirement would make it less profitable to produce small cars. And that's actually the right point. As we've seen in America, luxury buyers will pay a high premium for just about anything you throw on a car. Just call it "electronic air freshening" and tack another few hundred on that S-Class. [Financial Times]

Commenter of the Day: Viking Senior Citizens Edition

Murilee Martin — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 18:30:00 EST

Once again, Doctor Loverman is busy (no doubt performing a heart massage using a dirty toilet plunger), and so the duty of selecting the COTD falls to me. Today we had a chorus of huzzahs for this commenter's observation about Teutonic methods of keeping the elderly from slowing society down, and we're giving the latest Commenter of the Day award in accordance with the will of the mob.

Yes, No_Slushbox's observation on the story of the German man who spaced on his car at the gas station and walked home inspired us all to break out our Opeth albums and harden our hearts against the needs of senior citizens:

Letting old people keep their licenses in a country with no speed limits is how the Germans get rid of the elderly, kind of like how the Norwegians push the elderly out on flaming boats while listening to death metal.

Never mind that I once managed to leave a pickup at a gas station at age 25, (in my defense, it was a post-gig roadie situation with a whole fleet of half-running beaters and we didn't leave any gear behind in the forgotten truck). That was different! Don't put me on the boat!

Sideburns und Sunroof: Mercedes-Benz 300SEL

Murilee Martin — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 10:45:00 EST

With its crypto-Jimmy Smith soundtrack and groovy-looking driver hurling the big 300 through the twisties with, it's no wonder that foxy fräulein is digging on dude's choice of car. And who wouldn't? The W109 Mercedes-Benz was quite a machine!

Man Leaves Car At Gas Station, Keeps License?

Matt Hardigree — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 10:00:00 EST

Most of us will probably try and drive until they pry the keys from our cold, senile hands. But that doesn't mean we should be allowed to drive past the age that we can comprehend what's going on around us. I say this after reading about a German senior citizen that filled up his car with gas and just walked home. After about an hour the employees got suspicious and called the police (it took them an hour, btw). The man walked back, picked up his car and drove home. It could have just been a bad day, but did no one think to ask if the guy should be driving? [Reuters]

You Cannot Resist The Goggomobil Invasion!

Murilee Martin — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 14:00:00 EST

You think we're all done with the Goggomobil ads? Think again, Helmut! This short film documents the takeover of a small German city by hordes of Goggomobils, with a bouncy accordionic soundtrack to mask the ominous implications. Goggo! Goggo!

Goggo! Goggo! Goggomobil Knows Young and Old!

Murilee Martin — Tue, 06 Nov 2007 11:00:00 EST

This profoundly disturbing puppet-show advertisement for the Goggomobile will have you singing the little "Goggo! Goggo!" cuckoo-clock song until you get Tazed by your enraged coworkers. Goggo! Goggo! We're just disappointed that they didn't make a Goggomino version (though there was a van).

The Mercedes-Benz 280E Has The Funk!

Murilee Martin — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 16:45:00 EST

The early-70s ship of love in this German-market ad doesn't have fuzzy dice, but it does have bongos in the back. We dig the groovy soundtrack and outfits, of course, but the sight of big ol' German cars roaring around a banked track makes us even happier.

German Car Market in Das Ditch

Matt Hardigree — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 18:30:00 EDT

The Germans love Hasselhoff, but don't necessarily love buying new cars. For the tenth straight month in a row the year-over-year domestic sales slumped, marking a decline of 7.8% in new car registrations over the first ten months of 2006. Maybe it's because they make cars too reliable? Good financing rates? Industry officials are citing a three percentage point hike in the value-added tax and uncertainty among buyers over the ongoing climate debate. We buy the first one, but wouldn't getting rid of your old diesel Benzie and replacing it with a newer, cleaner car help the environment?[Reuters]

Teen Outruns German Police In Go-Kart

tingwall — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 13:00:00 EDT

German police are saying it was their cars, not their driving skills, that allowed an 18-year-old to outrun them in a go-kart. The teenie-bopper driver led seven squad cars on a 3-mile chase through the city of Moenchengladbach before he lost the fuzz by ducking into an open garage. A spokesman for the department said the kart's superior cornering abilities allowed the driver to get away. However, even superior driving skills are no match for basic common sense as officers later caught up with the suspect while he was still hiding in the same garage. He's been charged with driving without a license and driving a go-kart on a public street, which is against the law in Germany. Apparently running away from police is not an illegal activity in Deutschland. Who knew? [Reuters]

Autobahn Speed Limit? Chancellor Merkel Says NEIN!

Murilee Martin — Mon, 29 Oct 2007 09:15:00 EDT

After Germany's center-left Social Democratic Party and the conservative Christian Democratic Union backed a plan to impose a carbon-emissions-slashing 80MPH speed limit on the nation's famed no-limit freeways, Chancellor Angela Merkel told her own party to piss off: "It won't happen with me." [International Herald Tribune]

Einen VW-Transporter Muß Man Haben!

Murilee Martin — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 10:30:00 EDT

When it drives through your typical quaint German village, the early Transporter inhales crowds of pedestrians, construction equipment, stacks of boxes, whatever you got! Of course, with 36 horses clattering around in the back, it wasn't going to move all that stuff very quickly, but odds are you'd reach your destination.

New York Times Claims Imports Importing More Than Ever Before

Ray Wert — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 09:30:00 EDT

Interesting article over in the New York Times yesterday. It seems the number of cars being built outside of the United States (and North America) and being sold here is actually increasing rather rapidly. This despite protestations on non-US automakers that they're building more and more vehicles here. While it may be technically true there's more being built here, automakers are increasing the numbers of imported vehicles at an even more rapid pace. In fact, the Times claims

"The foreign companies against whom the Big Three compete are selling more and more cars that are not made at their factories in the United States, making labor costs here less important. They are importing again — in fact, quietly importing almost as many cars as they did in the 1980's when Japanese vehicles flooded the market, provoking an outcry, and also import quotas."

We're totally gonna go out and grab a copy of Gung-Ho immediately just to get back in touch with our early 80's understanding of quotas. By the way, when did the Times start going pro-US automakers? [via NYT]

BMW 1-Series Convertible, Full Press Kit

Mike Spinelli — Sun, 30 Sep 2007 13:44:46 EDT

A more artsy sort might call the above series of photos "triptych in B minor." We're just calling it part of the press kit released this week for the BMW 1 Series convertible. We've uploaded the full monty for your viewing, drooling or skewering pleasure. Whatever you think of the newest small BMW droptop or its hardtop sibling, we know that by mid-2008 we'll be dodging the daughters of the well heeled, as they attempt to dab on mascara, work their Sidekicks and steer these four-wheeled tanning salons at the same time.

Press Release:

BMW's 128i and 135i Convertibles Come to America in 2008

Woodcliff Lake, NJ - September 30, 2007... For those whose definition of pure driving pleasure includes wind in the face and sunshine above, the new BMW 1 Series Convertible follows the tradition established by the iconic BMW 2002 sport sedan. The essence of such driving purity - a responsive six-cylinder engine positioned within a rear-drive chassis to provide balanced, sporty dynamics - is at the heart of this compact four-place convertible.

The 128i Convertible, which joins the new 1 Series Coupe going on sale in the spring of 2008, will be powered by BMW's 3.0-liter, 230 horsepower inline six-cylinder engine generating 200 lb-ft of torque. Like its fixed-roof stablemate, the 128i Convertible will feature Valvetronic valvetrain management and aluminum/magnesium cylinder block construction—core elements of BMW's EfficientDynamics.

The 135i Convertible, on sale later in 2008, features BMW's twin-turbocharged 3.0-liter inline six-cylinder engine producing 300 horsepower and 300 lb-ft of torque from as low as 1,400 rpm. With its direct piezo gasoline injectors, twin low-mass turbochargers and air-to-air intercooler, optimum performance and economy is achieved with no loss in engine response. For the 135i Convertible, acceleration from 0-62 mph is accomplished in 5.6 seconds and top speed is electronically limited to 155 mph. Both engines feature on-demand engine coolant pumps that improve fuel economy and reduce parasitic losses for increased efficiency.

Distinctive BMW Convertible appearance

In a mere 22 seconds—even on the move at speeds up to 25 miles per hour—the occupants within the 1 Series Convertible can go from encapsulated comfort to top-down exhileration. If conditions dictate, the electro-hydraulically-operated softtop can be raised within the same 22 seconds, producing a distinctive silhouette enhanced by long frameless doors. The characteristic features of the BMW kidney-shaped grill, front skirt, door sills and rear skirt are identical to those of the 1 Series Coupe.

The standard softtop is available in either black or taupe cloth, but it is the optional Moonlight Black version which is unique to the 1 Series Convertible. Interwoven with fine shiny metallic fibers, this distinctive top produces a shimmery metallic silver appearance in sunlight. The visual effect enhances the convertible's exciting range of nine colors which includes an exclusive hue: Cashmere Silver Metallic.

A distinctive feature of the 1 Series Convertible is the flared shoulder line which runs parallel to the road. This shoulder line flows from the hood past the A pillar to the trunk lid, forming a surface which encompasses the entire interior, giving the impression of a boat deck.

The view from the rear is influenced by the position of the softtop: with the top lowered, completely concealed in the tail, the look is flat and elegant; the appearance with the top up is broad shouldered. The trunk lid has an integrated spoiler chiseled into the rear end of the car to accentuate the short rear section. On the 135i, an additional lip spoiler provides greater downforce on the rear end at high speeds.

The individual sections within the L-shaped rear taillights give the vehicle a lower, sportier look. Horizontal lights integrated in the rear light clusters offer a homogeneous lighting effect with the help of light-emitting diodes (LEDs). This light design, as found on other BMW models, makes the BMW 1 Series Convertible stand out at night. Also, the Adaptive Brakelights operating in two stages in relation to brake application force are yet another feature typical of BMW, with the additional benefit of extra safety on the road.

The standard (on the 135i) Adaptive Xenon Headlights (optional on the 128i), complete with integrated cornering lights, make driving in the dark safer than ever. The daytime headlight function, in typical BMW style, uses the four corona rings around each headlight to enhance the visibility of the car under normal and "murky" light conditions.

Convertible interior features technology enhanced comfort, convenience

Two unique BMW 1 Series Convertible features provide increased driver and passenger comfort, thus improving the overall experience regardless of the top's position. The optional Boston leather incorporates BMW's Sun Reflective Technology where pigments worked into the upholstery mitigate the effect of the sun's ultraviolet rays. Excessive heating of the seats and armrest is diminished, especially for darker interior colors. The overall effect can produce surface temperatures some 20 degrees Fahrenheit below a comparable "normal" leather interior.

The standard upholstery is a sporty and comfortable Leatherette, which is also the covering on the optional Sport Package's sports bucket seats with enhanced side support (Boston leather can be selected for this package).

The climate-control system in the 1 Series Convertible has an additional convertible mode (compared to the system in the BMW 1 Series Coupe) designed for open-roof conditions. The three standard modes; gentle, medium and intensive, react primarily to interior sensors, while the convertible mode reacts less to interior temperature and more to the exterior temperature and sunlight factors to establish the intensity of the ventilation.

Turbulence in the roof-down cabin can be reduced by an available wind deflector which can be affixed to the sides of the vehicle with a few adjustments. The wind deflector allows for conversation at normal sound levels and the ability to enjoy the wide variety of audio and communication offerings which include SIRIUS satellite radio, HD radio, the optional Premium Sound system and Bluetooth. For simple and straightforward connection of an MP3 player, an auxiliary input jack is standard and a USB port for direct control of an Apple iPod or iPhone media player is available as an option.

The control console for the entertainment and climate-control functions is integrated smoothly and harmoniously into the dashboard through its soft radii and flowing surfaces. With the optional navigation system, the iDrive controller is integrated in the center console, following BMW's characteristic philosophy of full driver control at all times. Galvanized pearl gloss surfaces adorn the interior door handles, the glove compartment handle, the radio's rotary knobs, the knobs of the automatic air conditioning system, the iDrive controller, and the ornamental trim strips featured on the sport steering wheel.

Enhanced iDrive provides programmable memory keys

BMW's iDrive is included with the optional navigation system. It enables the driver to control all secondary and comfort functions such as communication, air conditioning, entertainment and navigation functions easily and conveniently.

This latest version of iDrive is equipped with six Programmable Memory Keys allowing the driver to program often-used functions such as navigation destinations, radio stations or specific telephone numbers. Touch-sensitive sensors on each button allow the driver to preview the function on the iDrive screen before the button is fully depressed, activating the command. This allows the driver to choose the stored function safely and conveniently, keeping his or her eyes on the road in the process.

Spacious trunk supplemented by folding seat backs and storage bag

An active couple can carry their gear, regardless of the season, thanks to the generous trunk space offered by the 1 Series Convertible. Two golf bags will fit in the trunk of the new 1 Series Convertible - even with the top down! Lowering the soft top produces a storage space that is 8.48 cubic-feet, which does not include the optional large storage bag that extends into the passenger compartment and can accommodate two snow boards or a golf bag without soiling the upholstery. A zippered opening allows access into the storage bag from within the passenger compartment.

High-tech suspension with newly-developed differential

In traditional BMW style, the new BMW 1 Series Convertible transmits the power of the engine to the rear wheels. This design concept and configuration - engine at the front, drive wheels at the rear - guarantees optimum traction, near-perfect weight distribution front-to-rear, excellent directional stability, and predictable handling.

The front suspension is also built to a standard quite unique to its competitive group. The new 1 Series Convertible shares the 1 Series Coupe's sophisticated suspension system with an aluminum double-pivot front suspension and a five-link fully independent rear suspension in lightweight steel to offer an optimum combination of stiffness and low weight. The very stable track control arms and thrust rods make an important contribution to the car's driving dynamics and provide exacting wheel control.

The standard BMW Dynamic Stability Control (DSC) includes a Dynamic Traction Control (DTC) function that provides electronic intervention to prevent loss of vehicle control, but at a higher threshold before activation. This allows the driver to experience more spirited driving on dry roads and offers more flexibility when driving in more challenging conditions such as in the snow. If the driver desires, both DSC and DTC can be disabled. Active Steering, a variable ratio steering system exclusive to BMW, is available as an option.

The rear differential on the 1 Series comes from a new generation of final drives optimized for running smoothness. Featuring double-helical ball bearings for the first time, the differential runs at an even lower operating temperature reached more quickly than before thanks to the reduction of fluid required in the differential. Like the 1 Series Coupe, the Convertible features an electronic limited slip function built into the vehicle's Dynamic Stability Control system.

Safety equipment maximized for convertible design

The four standard airbags in the new BMW 1 Series Convertible are designed for the optimum protection of the car's occupants. The advanced frontal airbags are activated in stages in relation to impact severity while the side airbags integrated into the sides of the front seat backrests reduce the risk of injury at chest, hip and head levels in side impact situations. The new BMW 1 Series Convertible also comes with crash-optimized seats with specially padded headrests and backrests designed to reduce the risk of injury in an impact from the rear.

All seats within the 1 Series Convertible are fitted with three-point inertia-reel seat belts and headrests, with the front seat belts str fastened on the frames of the driver's and front passenger's seats, keeping the belt in an optimum position around the occupant's hips regardless of seat height or fore-aft placement.

Also, the driver's pedals move back automatically with a predetermined amount of deformation in the event of a frontal collision so that the risk of driver foot injury is reduced. And last but not least, the rear seats come standard with LATCH attachments for child seats.

The new BMW 1 Series Convertible is equipped with a roll-over sensor, which continually monitors the vertical and horizontal movements of the vehicle. As soon as the sensors register the danger of the vehicle rolling over, two roll bars are extended in fractions of a second from their storage areas behind the rear headrests. Simultaneously, the front-seat-belt tensioners and the head airbags are activated. Further roll-over protection is offered by the optimized stability of the A pillar and windshield frame.

BMW 1-Series Convertible, on Video

Mike Spinelli — Sat, 29 Sep 2007 19:26:55 EDT

What could be more relaxing than a spirited jaunt on a German country lane in a convertible? If you answered, "17 minutes in a dumpster full of clotted cream with Nigella Lawson," please focus. BMW released some b-roll of its new 128i convertible (yes, the same BMW 128i convertible we revealed to you mere moments ago — the drop-top version of the BMW 128i we revealed back in July, and yes, the same 1-series we saw the cloth pulled back on in Frankfurt) amidst a mild wringing on some Bavarian b-road. Its breezy cinematography makes us pine for those summer afternoons at the yacht club, relating bawdy jokes with the Windsor sisters and Edmund over gin and tonics. Oh, the squash matches we'd have. Then, we'd retire to Edmund's 325i convertible for line after line of Columbian high-grade. Ah, the tomfoolery.