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Detroit, 4:38 AM
Fri Dec 4
27 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #flupocalypse more →

    Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears

    Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of OldeEnglishD OldeEnglishD
    04/28/09

    In reply to Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears
    See this is what happens when we put Pigs in Space, they come back with a horrible flu that ends all commerce. Damn muppets!
     Reply
    OldeEnglishD was starred OldeEnglishD was unstarred
    Image of Ash78, cube farmer Ash78, cube farmer
    04/28/09

    In reply to Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears
    I read this morning that Honda is down 70%+ in profit for the year. That could also have a little something to do with this mandate.
     Reply
    Ash78, cube farmer was starred Ash78, cube farmer was unstarred
    Image of WheatKing WheatKing
    04/28/09

    @Ash78: Naw nothing to do with it..


    Never mind that some people think that it's ok for the tiny nation of Japan to have no less than 6 car makers (Honda / Toyota / Nissan / Subaru / Suzuki / Mitsubishi) and we are barely allowed to have 3.

     Reply
    WheatKing was starred WheatKing was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    04/28/09

    In reply to Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears
    In other news, Nissan has just released this letter.

    NISSAN Motor Co.

    We know that everyone is commending Honda for making sure it's workers don't travel anywhere because of the "Swine Flu." Well, here at NISSAN, we don't let any of our employees travel. If their NISSAN Ankle Blackbox senses they have traveled more than 50 feet from the factory of their house, they will be destroyed.

    Thank you, from the best car company ever, NISSAN.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    04/28/09

    @.357: The factory of their house? You mean "the factory, which is also their house"?
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    04/28/09

    @FuzzyPlushroomanyte: NISSAN doesn't bother with extra words.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of Ash78, cube farmer Ash78, cube farmer
    04/28/09

    In reply to Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears
    Further Insight says it's your Civic duty to tell the Pilot if you exhibit any Element of sickness, but if you feel Fit, your Odyssey is ultimately of your own Accord.
     Reply
    Ash78, cube farmer was starred Ash78, cube farmer was unstarred
    Image of robot-shmobot robot-shmobot
    04/28/09

    @Ash78: Seriously though, you couldn't fit Ridgeline or S2000 in there? Not satisfied. Haha
     Reply
    robot-shmobot was starred robot-shmobot was unstarred
    Image of Ash78, cube farmer Ash78, cube farmer
    04/28/09

    Fine.


    For longer roadtrips, CR-V rentals. S2000 dollars a month, plus fuel. Also, Ridgeline sucks.

     Reply
    Ash78, cube farmer was starred Ash78, cube farmer was unstarred
    Image of Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet
    04/28/09

    @Ash78: Such rare Insight.
     Reply
    Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet was starred Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    04/28/09

    @Ash78: Asimo and more push for hydrogen-fueled vehicles, but some Clarity in the issue maybe required before we Jet to a solution.
     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    04/28/09

    In reply to Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears
    Oh no he di'int!
     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    04/28/09

    In reply to Honda Puts Halt To Global Travel Over Swine Flu Fears
    You know a pig with the swine flu is still a pig... with lipstick... and it can fly.
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of Mobius Mobius
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    "Hey, have you prepared your Flupocalypse plan?"


    "Uhhh, whaaaat?"


    "Hey, listen, if you wanna live to see the light of day again, you gotta be ready when s*** comes knocking at the door. In this case, pig s***."


    "Oookaaay... Thanks for the concern, but no thanks. Hey, just outta interest, what are your plans?"


    "Oh, I shouldn't tell everything but basically one involves having a shotgun and blowing your flu-infected head off, and the other is visiting you and hugging you when I get infected. Yeah."

     Reply
    Mobius was starred Mobius was unstarred
    Image of combat chuck combat chuck
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    I'm getting this for my new daily driver:
     Reply
    combat chuck was starred combat chuck was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    Here's my answer to potential diasters.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    "If you have a specific plan in place beforehand you'll save time and therefore, potentially lives." I like to lives too.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of philipmein philipmein
    04/27/09

    @.357: I assume you mean you like to save lives?
     Reply
    philipmein was starred philipmein was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    04/27/09

    @philipmein: It was a grammatical error in the article.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    11) Keep at least one gun and plenty of ammo handy in case the virus mutates into one that causes zombification.


    12) If the scenario presented in step 11 comes to pass, consider familiarizing yourself with the procedures required to successfully steal a Unimog.

     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Matt Ehrlich Matt Ehrlich
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    You don't need masks or HEPA filters. Orthomyxoviruses (like influenza) are transmitted almost entirely by contact routes (handshaking, on surfaces). HANDWASHING should be on that list before anything else. It sounds contrived, but its the best way to control flu. btw, there are resistant strains of flu to oseltamivir, like last season's H1N1.
     Reply
    Matt Ehrlich was starred Matt Ehrlich was unstarred
    Image of Wes Siler Wes Siler
    04/27/09

    @Matt Ehrlich: Handwashing is included in the disinfectant section.
     Reply
    Wes Siler was starred Wes Siler was unstarred
    Image of Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    Thanks for these tips. I will now be taking the rest of the afternoon to write and emergency response plan. Tomorrow, I will go to the bus station and hold a meeting of several hundred travelers in a crowed, hot, unventilated room to discuss this action plan and how we can all work together.


    Sorry. Did I just sneeze on you?


    BTW, nice improved crush zone on that minibus.

     Reply
    Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet was starred Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet was unstarred
    Image of FLB is on vacation FLB is on vacation
    04/27/09

    @Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet: Well, I hope for you it's not planned in Acapulco: [www.cnn.com]
     Reply
    FLB is on vacation was starred FLB is on vacation was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    04/27/09

    @FLB: Well this keeps getting better and better.
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice
    04/27/09

    @FLB: I guess Nibbles has the sniffles.
     Reply
    discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice was starred discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    So...what you're saying is I probably shouldn't travel by plane through Mexico City with a 5 hour layover, then head down to a resort town full of bars and nightclubs and attend a wedding where half of the guests are from Mexico City?


    ...not that I'm planning on doing that 2 weeks from now or anything. Purely hypothetical.

     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of combat chuck combat chuck
    04/27/09

    @Mad_Science: It was nice knowin' ya. Where should I send flowers?
     Reply
    combat chuck was starred combat chuck was unstarred
    Image of discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice
    04/27/09

    @Mad_Science: Don't worry. Everyone will be dead by then anyway.
     Reply
    discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice was starred discontinuuity has left the Jalop until further notice was unstarred
    Image of Graverobber Graverobber
    04/27/09

    @Mad_Science: Probably also a good idea to stay away from U-Pull junkyards full of recent immigrants, and questionable public hygiene facilities. . .


    Uh oh.

     Reply
    Graverobber was starred Graverobber was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    04/27/09

    @Mad_Science: Just don't come to Canada after words, and it's all good.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    04/27/09

    @Graverobber: Yeah, I just keep rolling those dice, huh?
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
    Image of sos10 sos10
    04/27/09

    @Mad_Science: Just eat tons of Garlic.
     Reply
    sos10 was starred sos10 was unstarred
    Image of Sloop_John_B Sloop_John_B
    04/27/09

    In reply to Ten Ways To Prepare Your Car For The Swine Flupocalypse
    Bring it on you swine-flu infested zombies. A lift kit for offroading and a battering ram later will find me rampaging through fields mowing you suckers down:
     Reply
    Sloop_John_B was starred Sloop_John_B was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    04/27/09

    @Sloop_John_F*cking_B_Jalopnik_Gold_Edition: Make sure you weld some 2" square tubing around the fuel tanks to protect them. I would recommend you do that with the fuel tanks empty.


    Oh, and set up the engine so it can run on jet fuel, as well. Then you know where to go to stock up on fuel.

     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
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