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Detroit, 1:00 AM
Tue Nov 17
31 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Boosted Lego Wagon Boosted Lego Wagon
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    1] The Fast and The Furious

    2] 2 Fast 2 Furious

    3] The Fast and the Furious Tokyo Drift

    4] 4 Fastings and a Furious

    5] Fast and the Furious 5: Dom and Brian go to summer camp

    6] Fasty Diesel and the Goblet of Furious

    7] 7 Fast Brides for 7 Furious Brothers

    8] Octofuriousfasty

    9] Fast 9 from Outer Furious Space

    10] 10 Fast Things About You That Make Me Furious

    11] Fastenheit Furious/11

    12] 12 Furious Men (Who are also Fast)


    And some Nitrous in a Pear Tree.

     Reply
    Boosted Lego Wagon was starred Boosted Lego Wagon was unstarred
    Image of Plecostomus [Tyrrell] Plecostomus [Tyrrell]
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    As much as everyone 'says' they hate these films, if you're a car guy, you enjoy it for the comedy.


    What? You mean Fast and The Furious isn't a comedy?

     Reply
    Plecostomus [Tyrrell] was starred Plecostomus [Tyrrell] was unstarred
    Image of Evil-Jeremy Evil-Jeremy
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    I remember seeing the first movie at the drive-in and it was pretty cool. Not really as a decent movie, but for drive-in fare it was perfect. Cool driving moves and a plot that you really didn't have to pay that much attention to, so you could feel free to talk to your friends or whatever and not worry about getting lost.


    Then the second one came out, and about 12 minutes in there's a scene where Ludacris(?!) decides to show everyone how hardcore his races are by raising a bridge. The hero then jumps his car from about 200 feet up and lands perfectly on all 4 wheels. That was the exact moment that the series died for me.


    While the cast has gone back to the original, when I see the trailer I'm scared that it's going to go completely over the top with special effects again. The first movie mostly featured a lot of precision driving, there wasn't any "powerslide the car under a rolling, flaming tractor trailer" moments. We'll see though, but I'm pretty sure this one will be completely ridiculous, much like every one they made after the first.

     Reply
    Evil-Jeremy was starred Evil-Jeremy was unstarred
    Image of SwatLax SwatLax
    01/15/09

    @Evil-Jeremy: I agree with your lack of interest in the completely ridiculous. That said, Tokyo Drift was pretty reasonable in this area, since its about going around turns (rather than bridge jumping).


    Not that any of the 3 are good movies, but for watching people really driving cars on the big screen, it was the best one. Check it out if you're looking for 90 minutes to kill (or just FF through the dialogue and it'll go much quicker).

     Reply
    SwatLax was starred SwatLax was unstarred
    Image of SwatLax SwatLax
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    Brian: What's the retail on one of those?

    Ferrari Driver: More than you can afford pal.

    Dom: [turning to Brian] Smoke him.
     Reply
    SwatLax was starred SwatLax was unstarred
    Image of bzr bzr
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    It's got 500hp and a Borla exhaust!
     Reply
    bzr was starred bzr was unstarred
    Image of LTDScott LTDScott
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    Did I just see the F-bomb?


     Reply
    LTDScott was starred LTDScott was unstarred
    Image of Mike the Dog is sitting by the door with a pair of cow slippers, and a very sad face. Mike the Dog is sitting by the door with a pair of cow slippers, and a very sad face.
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    Oh, yeah. This is going to be great. Glaring continuity gaffe in the first thirty seconds of the trailer (baldy with the thin mustache goes over the bent top bar of the cyclone fence, then gets knocked off the straight top bar of the same section of fence). Physically impossible (okay, highly unlikely) car stunts (Chevelle on 12" DOT tires does a bumper-scraping wheelstand with zero chassis flex). And a veritable ballet of automotive carnage that I'm sure everybody walks away from, except our hero- whom I'm sure will be gravely injured, but will survive to star in yet another sequel.
     Reply
    Mike the Dog is sitting by the door with a pair of cow slippers, and a very sad face. was starred Mike the Dog is sitting by the door with a pair of cow slippers, and a very sad face. was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    What is this, the fourth one?
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of Elhigh Elhigh
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    Vin It's Not a Diesel's Dumb Toretto and Paul Walker's Not a Texas Ranger's Brainless O'Connor in yet another no-driving-skills-required visual effects masturbationpiece* of thrills chills and product placement shills. We got GN, GT-R, T&A and WTF. Your eight-year-old is gonna love it!


    *No cars were harmed in the making of this film. Hell, half the time all we did was shoot scenery and add the cars digitally three weeks later.

     Reply
    Elhigh was starred Elhigh was unstarred
    Image of lilwillie lilwillie
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    I still remember going to the first movie. When it let out every ricer was in the parking lot revving up there engine.


    I rolled my Apache out and let the side pipes cackle as loud as possible on one giant 5K rev.


    Suddenly the ricers where all quite.

     Reply
    lilwillie was starred lilwillie was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/15/09

    @lilwillie:


    And that, sir, is the American way.


    Still, I have a lot of respect for the import crowd. When it comes right down to it, it is really no different in concept or spirit than the age of T-bucket hot rods and so on. It's just a bunch of kids who can't afford much, certainly can't afford a Skyline, Corvette, etc. that are using their own ingenuity to do the best with what they have. You can't hate on them for that.


    You can, however, hate at will on the assclowns who think that they are awesome with their their bright yellow 1980s Honda Accords (et. al.) equipped with fart can exhausts, GT wings, neon lights, bondo body kits, and ZERO performance mods. It is they that five the import scene a bad image that it really doesn't deserve.

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of lilwillie lilwillie
    01/15/09

    @pauljones:


    Amen to that. I've built imports for racing. Honda's, all naturally aspired for Improved Touring Unlimited road racing. 232 horse at the front wheels from a B18 is impressive, especially when it holds together for a season. The import crowd as you mentioned is like the old guys. I've always compared them to the Muscle Car era. They are always tinkering and trying to gain something.


    It is too bad they have a large portion of bad apples that give them the bad rap.

     Reply
    lilwillie was starred lilwillie was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    01/15/09

    @lilwillie: @pauljones: Agreed. I've dumped well over $12k into the engine and drivetrain of my car... and all of about $300 into the exterior -- and that was just for a new style of headlight, since the stock ones are like candles in jam jars. I've lost count of how many times I've had some kid in a Sunfire or Civic with a fart-can exhaust revving their engine at me. I mean, I'm a hot-hatch tuner as well, but shit, you're giving us all a bad name.
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    01/15/09

    @lilwillie: What year is your Apache?
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/15/09

    @Deartháir:


    Candles in jam jars? Do you, per chance, drive an Integra?

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    There's a plot??!!?? It's got cars, babes, cars, more babes, shit blowing up, babes... who needs a plot?


    It's not like we're all pretending it's a real movie, right?

     Reply
    Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness was starred Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/15/09

    @Vintage Racer is out taking pictures:


    Needs more booth professionals.

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    Dom Toretto: "*mechanical breathing sounds* Bryan, I am your father *mechanical breathing sounds*"


    Bryan: "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Wait, you mean all this time I have been nailing my aunt!? NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!"

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    01/15/09

    @pauljones: I LOL'd.
     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Landau_Calrissian loves our President Camacho. Landau_Calrissian loves our President Camacho.
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    I will not even pretend that I won't be in line to see this, unironically. The girls alone are usually worth the price of admission to these movies, even the last one.


    I will not see Transformers for any $ after how awful the first one was, though. Nothing could save that.

     Reply
    Landau_Calrissian loves our President Camacho. was starred Landau_Calrissian loves our President Camacho. was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/15/09

    @Landau_Calrissian:


    Megan Fox bending over the hood of a Camaro > all the girls in the FF series combined.


    In my humble opinion.

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of SRekauqh SRekauqh
    01/15/09

    @pauljones: Megan Fox taking a dump > all the girls in the FF series combined.
     Reply
    SRekauqh was starred SRekauqh was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/15/09

    @SRekauqh:


    Now, now, let's not knock Eva Mendes that much, because the truth is, she is knock-your-socks-off good looking, but yes, Megan Fox wins.

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Maymar Maymar
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    What would make these movies so much more entertaining is more destroying tires, and less destroying brain cells. Just an hour and a half of skidding, drifting, and crashing.
     Reply
    Maymar was starred Maymar was unstarred
    Image of Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978 Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978
    01/15/09

    In reply to Fast And Furious Trailer Reveals More Grand National Abuse
    Fast and Furious: Diesel Fitter
    (subtitle: Torque - the other white meat)


    It starts out with Vin telling a joke about two guys applying for unemployment. One's a women's shoemaker and the other is a diesel fitter. The shoemaker receives $200/week and the diesel fitter gets $300. When the women's shoemaker protests this, he points out to the clerk that he makes the shoes, the other guy just inspects them and say "Yep, diesel fitter"


    And something about living one's live an eighth mile at a time.

     Reply
    Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978 was starred Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978 was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    01/15/09

    @Ash78: I wondered where "diesel fitter" was going. I chuckled.
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    01/15/09

    @Ash78: You have been saving that one for months, waiting for a chance to use it, haven't you?
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978 Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978
    01/15/09

    @Deartháir: Years. It's best told aloud, with "diesel fitter" said the way Sling Blade would have said it.
     Reply
    Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978 was starred Amalgamated Stainless Headers, est.1978 was unstarred
    Image of Elhigh Elhigh
    01/15/09

    @Ash78: That's a recap of an old Ole and Lena joke.
     Reply
    Elhigh was starred Elhigh was unstarred
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