Bernie Ecclestone gives Austin one final chance for F1 race

Bernie Ecclestone, billionaire Formula 1 overlord and Muppet, has given the parties behind the troubled 2012 United States Grand Prix at Austin's Circuit of the Americas exactly one week to fix everything before the race is finally cancelled.

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Ecclestone wants U.S. Grand Prix moved to November

It's so hot in Austin in June that even I, as a lowly Freshman at the University of Texas, could occasionally convince women to take some of their clothes off for me. Using that same logic, Bernie Ecclestone's desire to move the US Grand Prix from its provisional June date to November is either the worst or best thing…

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F1 Boss Bernie Ecclestone Mugged, Out $314,000

F1 chief Bernie Ecclestone was mugged this Wednesday, after complaining muggers look for people who are "a bit soft and simple." Also, they look for people carrying around $314,000 in jewelry, Scrooge McDuck. (Hat tip to Tadashi!) [AP/ESPN]

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