Donk

1976 Buick Regal

You know what we haven't had in this series? Donks! Oakland, just across a narrow estuary from Alameda, has a fair number of donkified GM cars, but the trend seems to be dying out. In any case, donkmania never got very big in Alameda, where old-school musclecars and lowriders seem to be the customization themes of choice. Here's a rare Alameda donk, which I shot next to Alameda High over the winter (no, it doesn't rain here in June). The car parked on that block every school day, so is it a teacher's car or a student's?
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9:00 AM on Fri Jun 20 2008
By Murilee Martin
2,419 views, 76 comments

Latest by freeride53: that guy goes to my school. that's my school. more »

found on craigslist

Plymouth Volare Rolls On 24s, End Times Upon Us?

Those tiny 14" wheels that Chrysler put on the Volare? Pizza cutters! Shopping-cart wheels! Try adding another ten inches of diameter to a Volare's wheels and you'll finally fill up those unsightly wheelwells, as we can can see in this '76. You need to keep the air shocks fully inflated in order to keep rear wheel scrapage to almost-tolerable levels, and there appears to be about 3/4" of space between the fronts and the wheelwells... but just look at it! Thanks to LTDScott, Porcubimmer Pilot for the tip! [Craigslist Stockton, go here if ad disappears]

7:00 AM on Thu Apr 24 2008
By Murilee Martin
2,353 views, 60 comments

Latest by n/a: THere's something like bricks holding up the car just behind the front wheel. The rear's got the stock 14s. The front dub is just posing and has absolutely no chance in hell of rolling, turning or doing anythign a wheel more »

found on craigslist

Why Should GM Boxes Have All The Donkin' Fun?

The problem with putting huge-diameter wheels on most cars is the pesky fenderwells getting in the way, but this Floridian has avoided that problem by putting 20s on a VW-based dune buggy. A bit of fiberglass cutting and they fit just fine! Nitpickers might point out that the dunes are now off-limits with this setup, and that the pavement handling qualities might be a bit scary with that swingaxle rear and 20/80 front/rear weight distribution... but you'll be having so much fun with the insane power-to-weight ratio offered by the 2200cc engine that you won't fear death! Thanks to Mehugtree for the tip! [Craigslist Ft. Lauderdale]

3:00 PM on Fri Mar 21 2008
By Murilee Martin
1,372 views, 24 comments

Latest by skulldriveshaft: so it's AWD? more »

found on ebay

Bored By Cadillacs In Drab Colors?

What is it about Florida? The 2000 election, the Primate Aztek, and now this. What we have here is a 2000 Cadillac DeVille with a wild two-tone paint job, neon, spinners, the works. But mostly it's the paint... well, and the interior. If you buy this car- and the current bid is just $7600 at the time of this writing- we guarantee you will be noticed! [eBay Motors]

10:00 AM on Thu Dec 20 2007
By Murilee Martin
2,636 views, 84 comments

Latest by Elhigh: OW OW OW! I thought my monitor had gone on the fritz. Take this with a big slice of WhatTheHell? more »

donk or bubble?

A Little Pinto That Shouldn't; Wait, We Take That Back

Lets see. Would this mid-70s Ford Pinto mid-riser qualify as a Donk or a Bubble? Either way, I think we're all for this kind of thing, if only due to its blend of twisted irony and off-kilter car-to-rims value ratio. We're also wincing for those craptacular Pinto axles and poor differential struggling to make heads or tails of that acres-from-stock wheel diameter. (Thanks to 72GTOJudge for the tip.) [ChevyBombs.com]

8:39 PM on Thu Aug 23 2007
By Mike Spinelli
3,290 views, 28 comments

Latest by n/a: I bought a 73 pinto 2 weeks ago did a little work on it eng. looks ok Im thinking of get it registerd. I go to town often to pick up car + boat parts. I drive a 79 ranchero more »

how would you like a nice...

Donk, er Bubble of the Day: Hawaiian Punch Cutlass

We went into this post with every intention of deriding this Olds Cutlass highriser. But we've made a turnabout in the past few minutes, owing to our fondness for Hawaiian Punch and A-body Cutlesses. Sure, this thing has rims the diameter of wagon wheels, sure it has an interior only Spiderman could love, sure it has laminated seat covers. But, c'mon, Hawaiian freaking Punch. As long as it's not a Tang-themed GTO Judge, we're good. (Thanks to John for the tip.) [eBay]

2:45 PM on Tue Aug 7 2007
By Mike Spinelli
3,379 views, 29 comments

Latest by kfdave: Maybe I'm not as old as I think,you all seem to hate these ridiculous vehicles as much as I do..... Hope for his sake he "sales" it though.... more »

because wheel size matters

Crystal-Studded Wheel Size Emblems!

Look, folks, if you're going the donk route, do it right! It's like having a dekotora- do you want subtlety or restraint? Of course you don't! You want to put big jeweled emblems advertising your donk's wheel size, preferably all over the car, but at least on the fenders. Iced Out Emz has a vast selection of such emblems, available for 20s all the way up to monster-truck-esque 30s; you can choose "diamonds," "emeralds," "rubies" and so on. Thing is, what if you're donking a Honda 600? 15" wheels would be considered donkworthy in that case, but unfortunately no 15" emblems are available. – Murilee Martin More »

4:30 PM on Wed Jun 13 2007
By Murilee Martin
1,687 views, 24 comments

Latest by n/a: I wish I had pictures of this monstrosity but there is a Ford Festiva rolling around Louisville that's been 'donked' out. Most rediculous thing I've seen in a long time. But I'll give the kid that drives it credit...you definitely more »

down on the street

Welcome to Oaktown: Mildly Donked Skylark

At the Oakland Coliseum BART station yesterday, we spied this '69 Buick Skylark sitting proudly by itself in the parking lot. Not so much a donk as a car heavily influenced by donkism (and Oakland, proud home of 2 $hort, is certainly on the leading edge of donkitude, what with the box Caprices teetering on absurd-diameter wheels you see towering over traffic around here), this Skylark actually looks halfway decent with the treatment... More »

4:30 PM on Thu May 17 2007
By Murilee Martin
4,779 views, 14 comments

question of the day

Question of the Day: Donk or Dekotora?

Okay...it's clobberin' time. Are you gonna roll on 30s, with possible Dada-esque corporate sponsorship all over ya box? Or are you gonna take Hetfield's advice and hit the lights? Mob up or convoy? How would you, dear reader, rather roll through West Oakland cranking a bootleg of Tim Armstrong and Matt Freeman of Rancid's unreleased Downfall record? Head nods mandatory. Just don't break ya neck. – Davey G. Johnson More »

7:15 PM on Tue Apr 10 2007
By Davey G. Johnson
1,192 views, 24 comments

commentary

Fast as a Shark: No Sleep 'til Lynbrook

It's 10:46pm California time as I sit down to write this. But I'm not in San Pedro. I'm somewhere near Saint Marks Place in New York City, and the only sounds in the room are the tapping of two Apple keyboards and the rattling dull whine of air filters sucking the cigarette smoke out of the air of a spacious loft replete with a machine gun and a glass-encased model of the Bismarck. On the chairs at the bar hang three jackets, with a black, non-descript number in the middle. To its left is a navy blue Red Kap work jacket with a lakes modified roadster screenprinted across the back, reading "GEARHEAD." To its right hangs a high-visibility orange example sporting a rearing horse patch on the sleeve denoting a foreign police agency. More »

7:00 PM on Fri Apr 6 2007
By Davey G. Johnson
227 views, 2 comments

Latest by lascauxcaveman: Another nice slice-of-mindset, Davey. Just a note, if you're helping someone whack their memoir into shape, maybe you should know that (at the risk of execution) that last phrase in graph seven should read "to Spinelli and me yesterday." more »

custom cars

All Hail the First Video of a Clear-Rims Burnout: The Garfield Box

Too early for a moment of Zen, you say? Ok, then, how about a wake-up call. This cartoonishly orange high-riser box Chevrolet Caprice fitted with $30,000 clear rims, performing a class-1 burnout, offers a more bracing start to the day than cold OJ ever could. Enjoy, in a sense. – Mike Spinelli More »

7:31 AM on Wed Mar 14 2007
By Mike Spinelli
5,376 views, 16 comments

retro

Early Riser: 1902 Wartburg

People think that this whole "sitting up high" trend only dates back to the rise of the minivan and SUV and carried further by monster trucks, donks, boxes and bubbles. No, friends. It goes back to the carriage. People have always liked sitting up high. It's the fault of the step-down Hudson and the Chicanos in East Los Angeles and Colin Chapman and Duffy Livingstone that we ever thought we were supposed to be low to the ground. Fahrzeugfabrik Eisenach AG was established in 1898 Heinrich Ehrhardt, and by 1902, they were cranking out the Wartburg. 8.5hp, 640kg. And no doubt, it's definitely a proto-donk. – Davey G. Johnson More »

10:30 PM on Thu Nov 16 2006
By Davey G. Johnson
102 views, 2 comments

Latest by htrodblder: Picture a Wartburg riding on "24's" Yea I know, sick, just plan sick. more »

custom cars/hot rods

You Deserve a Break Today, At McDonkles

Apparently, the independent, corporate themed donk may be somewhat of a trend. This one apparently dispenses special sauce. Maybe it runs on french-fry oil. Somehow, though, we're guessing not. [Thanks to Andrew for the tip.] – Davey G. Johnson More »

6:00 PM on Mon Nov 13 2006
By Davey G. Johnson
3,022 views, 9 comments

custom cars/hot rods

SEMA Show: Donk a What?

The Rides team unveiled an ber donk (technically, a "box") mid-80s Chevy Caprice that combines dubba-dubs with quad scissor doors, over and mega airhorns out front and a bigorific intake bulge. Scotto, what's witchu bwoy? [Gallery] More »

7:58 PM on Tue Oct 31 2006
By Mike Spinelli
43,684 views, 41 comments

weird

Dumb Things I Gotta Donk Today: A Simpsons-Themed Riser

Taking this one apart would seem like a no-brainer. Sure, it's a garish mid-riser donk with wheels that look like a piece of George Clinton's mothership tumbled down and crushed Bootsy Collins. And sure, it's been airbrushed with characters from "The Simpsons." But we're not talking about Bart with an "Eat My Shorts" thought bubble. That's Abe Simpson, smack on the driver's door, followed by Mr. Burns and Nelson Muntz. Granted, he could have inserted Ralph Wiggum with his finger in his nose, or the Comic Book Guy holding that rare Mary Worth, or even Rabbi Hyman Krustofski. What we mean to say is, it could have been worse. Way worse. [Thanks to Eric for the tip.] More »

10:57 AM on Thu Sep 7 2006
By Mike Spinelli
5,288 views, 10 comments

Latest by renegade: This guy: "Make sure you fix my dope whip with Genuine GM Parts." Mechanic: "Sir, your car was built in Yugoslavia from old Russian tank parts." This guy: "Doh!" more »

news

Save Your (Grandparents') Generation: Youngsters Rolling In Oldster Whips

Bumbeck's a man whose observations we often find notable. One of the more notable observations of Bumbeck's was that car culture trends in Oakland by and large seem to start with somebody's grandmother dying. The Wall Street Journal has even picked up on Uncle Bumbeck's truism and drops a reference to the city's International Boulevard in their story on why the kids are donkin' up their grandfathers' Oldsmobiles. More »

3:51 PM on Thu May 11 2006
By Davey G. Johnson
605 views, 13 comments

Jalopnik

2009 BMW 7-Series Thinks It's KITT, Has Human-Detecting Night Vision

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