The Way Carmakers Reveal New Cars Is False, Idiotic And Nonsensical

I think his name was Hans Lehmann. He was the man for whom the dubious job description 'car scoop photographer' was invented, and his ability of snaffle out disguised prototypes as they performed pre-production testing on public roads was legendary. He must have made a small fortune in his pomp, and no one could deny… » 1/22/15 3:39pm 1/22/15 3:39pm

How Money Is (Not) Made In Auto Journalism

Do you work in an industry that is fundamentally broken? If you do, does it leave you unsettled because you don't know how best to react? That terrible self-pitying need to sit and moan with your colleagues about the desolation of the wider situation set against the exciting knowledge that now is the time you might… » 1/16/15 3:00pm 1/16/15 3:00pm

Everything That's Awful About The Detroit Auto Show

There is much confusion and misinformation surrounding the actual definition of the phrase 'pure-joy.' To many it is a pallid cliché constructed around what they perceive as being their perfect pastime – their moment of uncontaminated joy. But I can now de-bunk this nonsense, for 'pure-joy' is actually not a perfect… » 1/08/15 2:15pm 1/08/15 2:15pm

How Americans Can Simultaneously Build The Worst And Best Cars

The first time I rode in an American car I didn't know it was an American car, but I did know it seemed very different to my daddy's car. And my mummy's car. It was huge, and it sounded angry, and it didn't have a gearlever on the floor – in fact the gearlever didn't seem to be used much at all – and it felt kind of… » 12/11/14 1:10pm 12/11/14 1:10pm

How Formula One Actually Works: A Guide For Confused Americans

Cricket is considered to be the most impenetrable game for non-Englishmen to comprehend. Being English I cannot understand why foreigners might struggle to grasp the appeal of sitting on a wooden bench and watching 22 men occasionally move on-and-off a large field for five days, but believe me when I tell you that a… » 11/20/14 12:00pm 11/20/14 12:00pm

Lamborghinis Are The Perfect Cars For People Who Can't Drive

The problem with writing a column with the working title 'the problem with Lamborghini' just before a major motor show is that it doesn't account for the possibility that Lamborghini might unveil its best concept car since the Miura. But even post-Asterion unveil, I think Lamborghini has regressed into being a… » 11/13/14 12:00pm 11/13/14 12:00pm

"Chris Harris's Jalopnik Column, On Jalopnik"

'Oh, and think of a name for your column too." The words sat discarded at the bottom of a Hardigree email containing the details of the miserly sum he'd offered in exchange for me filling this space once a week. So I thought I'd write a column about how you might go about naming a column. And see if the process… » 11/06/14 12:00pm 11/06/14 12:00pm