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Detroit, 1:10 AM
Sun Nov 29
8 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #chases more →

    Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer

    Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops

    Suspect Leads Chase Through Car Wash, Can't Clean Record

  • Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.

    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Thomas Paladino Thomas Paladino
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    It never gets old.
     Reply
    evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars promoted this comment Thomas Paladino was starred Thomas Paladino was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    08/21/09

    @Thomas Paladino: You're right. It never gets old, but it does get better (see my comment below). Yes, I'm tooting my own horn, but I'm also trying to teach you some comment-fu. You, Thomas Paladino, can be me understudy. My padawan.
     Reply
    evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars promoted this comment engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of RoninianHoon RoninianHoon
    08/24/09

    @Thomas Paladino: +1
     Reply
    RoninianHoon was starred RoninianHoon was unstarred
    Image of superbadd75, now I remember why I left... superbadd75, now I remember why I left...
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    I'm pretty sure he didn't have it trimmed right, making it unstable at speed.
     Reply
    evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars promoted this comment superbadd75, now I remember why I left... was starred superbadd75, now I remember why I left... was unstarred
    Image of DarthLefty DarthLefty
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    He really only wanted the trailer anyways.

    Google chat bing at 26 sec mark?
     Reply
    FP - Activity resumes! promoted this comment DarthLefty was starred DarthLefty was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    08/21/09

    @DarthLefty: Uhh, yeah. Actually, it was. I thought it was my laptop.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    You knew it was coming:

    [Intro (T-Pain)]
    (Shortayyyy) Aww shit
    Get your trucks ready it's about to go down (shorty, yeah)
    Everybody in the place hit the fuckin' deck (shorty, yeah)
    But stay on your motherfuckin' toes
    We stealin' this, let's go

    [Chorus (T-Pain)]
    I stole a boat (I stole a boat)
    I stole a boat (I stole a boat)
    Everybody look at me cause I'm stealin' a boat (stealin' a boat)
    I stole a boat (I stole a boat)
    I stole a boat
    Take a good hard look at the motherfuckin' boat (boat, yeah)

    [The Lonely Island (T-Pain)]
    I stole a boat motherfucker take a look at me
    Straight towin' a hot boat on Highway 93
    Bustin' sixty five, cops aimin' at my throat
    You can't stop me motherfucker cause I stole a boat

    Take a picture, trick (trick) I stole a boat, bitch (bitch)
    We drinking Santana champ, cause it's so crisp (crisp)
    I got my jump suit, and my leggie-chainies
    I'm flippin' for Bubba, you at Kinko's straight flippin copies

    I'm ridin' the chain gang, bustin' rocks and shit
    The warden's beatin', getting' e'rybody bloody
    But this ain't Seaworld, this is real as it gets
    I stole a boat motherfucker, don't you ever forget

    I stole a boat and, it's goin fast and
    I got a trailer but no sway control
    I'm the best thief in the world, stealin' like Milli
    If you're in the store, then you're sho' not Vanilli
    {Get the fuck up, this boat is REAL!!!}

    Fuck land, I stole a boat, motherfucker (motherfucker)
    Fuck trees, I climb buoys, motherfucker (motherfucker)
    I'm in the truck with my boys, motherfucker (yeah)
    This cop's siren make noise, motherfucker

    Hey ma, if you could see me now (see me now)
    Arms spread wide on the dirty ground (dirty ground)
    Gonna fly this boat to the moon somehow (moon somehow)
    Like Kevin Garnett, anything is possible

    [T-Pain]
    Yeah, never thought I'd steal a boat
    It's a big maximum security prison (yeah)
    Poseidon~!! Look at me, oh (all hands on deck)
    Never thought I'd see the day
    When a big boat comin' my way
    Believe me when I say, I fucked a roommate

    [Chorus]

    [T-Pain]
    Whoahhh
    Sha-sha-shorty, shorty
    Yeah yeah yeahhh
     Reply
    skaycog-live,love,laugh! promoted this comment Edited by engineerd at 08/21/09 5:11 PM engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of skaycog was here skaycog was here
    08/21/09

    @engineerd:
    Wow....don't you just love BS?
     Reply
    skaycog was here was starred skaycog was here was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    08/21/09


    @engineerd:
     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    08/21/09

    @skaycog-live,love,laugh!: After a few swigs of the BS, it just kind of flowed.

    @Tomsk: Haha...yum!
     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of HoonThatFerrari HoonThatFerrari
    08/21/09

    @engineerd:
    Heart-clizznick for you, Muthaf*ckaaa!
     Reply
    HoonThatFerrari was starred HoonThatFerrari was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    08/21/09

    @HoonThatFerrari: Hey, that's a nice star you got there!
     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of HoonThatFerrari HoonThatFerrari
    08/22/09

    @engineerd: Star? What sta... OHHHHH, THAT! Yes, that showed up this evening... thanks for noticing!

    I must say it was a rather big event, too... FedEx showed up at the door with an envelope, a little mariachi band started playing a festive tune, one of the girls from Godaddy.com was there & she started peeling off her shirt, but unfortunately stopped before she got to any of the good bits, just like all their commercials. There was just one bit of a downer when I opened up the FedEx envelope, though - all that was in there was a Post-It note with what appeared to be a hastily-scrawled message in crayon that said: "Don't f*ck it up, BITCH!"
     Reply
    HoonThatFerrari was starred HoonThatFerrari was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    08/22/09

    @HoonThatFerrari: Hilarious! I had a star once. I showed up. No warning about f*cking it up. I did. Now its gone. Heed that warning, my friend.

    @BrettVette: Yeah, 93 rhymed though.
     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of SRekauqh SRekauqh
    08/24/09

    @HoonThatFerrari: Hahahahaha. Started my week off with a bang. Congrats on the star, and thanks for the story.
     Reply
    HoonThatFerrari promoted this comment SRekauqh was starred SRekauqh was unstarred
    Image of RoninianHoon RoninianHoon
    08/24/09

    @engineerd: +100
     Reply
    RoninianHoon was starred RoninianHoon was unstarred
    Image of HoonThatFerrari HoonThatFerrari
    08/25/09

    @SRekauqh: Thanks, Bro! ;)
     Reply
    HoonThatFerrari was starred HoonThatFerrari was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    Note to parents who always give their kids what they want in order to avoid temper tantrums: This is the kind of shit you can expect them to pull someday.
     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Who's A Toaster!!?? Who's A Toaster!!??
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    Well, that little "three hour tour" will probably cost that guy 1 - 3 in the slammer, where he can be someone's "Little Buddy".
     Reply
    mr_dude promoted this comment Who's A Toaster!!?? was starred Who's A Toaster!!?? was unstarred
    Image of skaycog was here skaycog was here
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer

    You always gotta remember that things could be worse.
     Reply
    skaycog was here was starred skaycog was here was unstarred
    Image of HammSammich HammSammich
    08/21/09

    @skaycog-live,love,laugh!: I don't know...this seems like a pretty good reason to have a boat in my opinion.
     Reply
    mr_dude promoted this comment HammSammich was starred HammSammich was unstarred
    Image of Number_Six Number_Six
    08/21/09

    @skaycog-live,love,laugh!: I'm heart-clicking you because you have displayed such wonderful optimism.
     Reply
    Number_Six was starred Number_Six was unstarred
    Image of mr_dude mr_dude
    08/21/09

    @HammSammich: Boat anchors you!
     Reply
    mr_dude was starred mr_dude was unstarred
    Image of skaycog was here skaycog was here
    08/21/09

    @HammSammich:
    Oh yeah, gotcha! Your comment went over my head at first.
     Reply
    skaycog was here was starred skaycog was here was unstarred
    Image of evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars
    08/21/09

    @skaycog-live,love,laugh!: And this is what happens when a boater steals a truck.
     Reply
    evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars was starred evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars was unstarred
    Image of skaycog was here skaycog was here
    08/21/09

    @evoCS-Hench-Minion to the stars:
    Oh, yeah! I should have had a caption contest for this.
     Reply
    skaycog was here was starred skaycog was here was unstarred
    Image of Number_Six Number_Six
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer
    At least this hasn't changed one bit:

    "Boston Whaler boats are unsinkable! For over 50 years, our patented Unibond® construction has built a loyal following of boaters. Whether its fishing, cruising, watersports or just enjoying time with friends, Boston Whaler has a runabout, tender, center console, cuddy cabin or walkaround to fit your boating style. It's the reason we're known as The Unsinkable Legend™."
     Reply
    Number_Six was starred Number_Six was unstarred
    Image of VeeArrrSix VeeArrrSix
    08/21/09

    @Number_Six:
     Reply
    Number_Six promoted this comment VeeArrrSix was starred VeeArrrSix was unstarred
    Image of Number_Six Number_Six
    08/21/09

    @VeeArrrSix: My crappy old office IE won't let me see what you've put there.
     Reply
    Number_Six was starred Number_Six was unstarred
    Image of Scandinavian Flick Scandinavian Flick
    08/21/09

    In reply to Why You Don't Steal A Boat On A Trailer

    All abord the failboat!
     Reply
    Scandinavian Flick was starred Scandinavian Flick was unstarred
    Image of skaycog was here skaycog was here
    08/21/09

    @Scandinavian Flick:
    You say potatoes. I say potatoes. You say abord. I say aboard.
     Reply
    skaycog was here was starred skaycog was here was unstarred
    Image of something_unique_and_descriptive something_unique_and_descriptive
    04/10/09

    In reply to Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops
    "Police concerned suspect may have been under the influence"... reeeeeaaaaaaalllly... what was the tip off?


    High speed pursuit, that's just normal crazy. Donuts on the median, narrows it down a bit. Stopping in the middle of a high speed pursuit to antagonize your pursuers while leaving the car in gear... well, my friend, that is a special brand of crazy I hadn't seen before.

     Reply
    something_unique_and_descriptive was starred something_unique_and_descriptive was unstarred
    Image of wookie1901 wookie1901
    04/10/09

    In reply to Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops
    I'm really impressed at how nimble the little xB was, and MSN would have you believe that the tC is the most dangerous car on the road.


    By the way the tC is the third quickest car for under 20 grand.

     Reply
    wookie1901 was starred wookie1901 was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    04/10/09

    @wookie1901: There's no way the tC is more dangerous than the Lexus ES.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of ☠Grяrяrяrяrя, portrait of a chickenwolfmoosepig. ☠Grяrяrяrяrя, portrait of a chickenwolfmoosepig.
    04/10/09

    In reply to Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops
    At least they didn't have to worry about her making a high-speed getaway.
     Reply
    ☠Grяrяrяrяrя, portrait of a chickenwolfmoosepig. was starred ☠Grяrяrяrяrя, portrait of a chickenwolfmoosepig. was unstarred
    Image of damnelantra™ damnelantra™
    04/10/09

    @Comrade ☠Grяrяrяrяrяrяrя reporting for duty!: it need not be a high-speed getaway anymore. a few months ago a woman from lancaster evaded police in a u-hal renal van. she had driven some 150 miles at around 45mph the whole time.


    only to stop due to a non-spike strip tire blowout

     Reply
    damnelantra™ was starred damnelantra™ was unstarred
    Image of DoctorNine DoctorNine
    04/10/09

    In reply to Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops
    This is your brain:



    This is your brain on Scion xB:


     Reply
    DoctorNine was starred DoctorNine was unstarred
    Image of theeastbaykid theeastbaykid
    04/10/09

    In reply to Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops
    Pretty respectable chase duration for a crazy woman in a 100hp econobox. Put me in a WRX and I could go for days.
     Reply
    theeastbaykid was starred theeastbaykid was unstarred
    Image of Mobius Mobius
    04/10/09

    In reply to Scion-Driving Crazy Lady Forces High Speed Chase, Gets Out To Flip Off Cops
    That's what happens when you Drive Under Influence


    of stupid.

     Reply
    Mobius was starred Mobius was unstarred
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