Truck ID Helps Nab Chronic Masturbator Named Dick In Tickle Creek

Those of you who keep track of all the chronic masturbators I write about on Jalopnik may remember this creepy-ass, Chevy truck-driving public Onanist. Well, good news! Thanks to an ID on his truck, he's been caught! And his last name is Dick, and was caught after exposing himself in a place called Tickle Creek. How… » 3/26/15 4:54pm Today 4:54pm

Kansas Cops Nab Guy In Skyline Doing 176 MPH Until His Engine Blew

Driving absurdly fast on public roads with general traffic on them is a colossally stupid idea, and this time it looks like the car agreed, committing suicide instead of being part of continued stupidity. The Kansas Highway Patrol arrested a man yesterday for going 176 MPH on Interstate 35, and caught him because his… » 3/23/15 3:20pm Monday 3:20pm

How America's Speeding Tickets And Traffic Fines Are Totally Broken

John Oliver's most recent segment on Last Week Tonight was generally about the 'fuck barrel' of draconic municipal fines in this country. It should come as no surprise that a great deal of these fees start with speeding tickets and traffic infractions. It should come as even less of a surprise that the system is a… » 3/23/15 2:15pm Monday 2:15pm

A Fake Predatory Taxi Is Roaming NYC Streets And Stealing Your Money

At least one fake taxi has been prowling New York City streets, skimming and stealing credit cards. And while you think that you, the eagle-eyed observer, would never be caught dead in a blatantly fake taxi, you’re wrong. Because this fake taxi was damn near a perfect replica of the real deal. » 3/23/15 1:23pm Monday 1:23pm

Drunk-Driver Calls 911 On Himself, Patiently Awaits Cops Because Canada

Is it the cold? Is it the cold that somehow freezes the parts of their brains that should make Canadians into assholes? Is that why, when you hear that a guy driving drunk pulled over and called the cops on himself, it's not a shock to hear he's Canadian? Maybe it's something in poutine? » 3/23/15 9:39am Monday 9:39am

A Great Thing Happened After Thieves Stole And Stripped My First Car

For those of you lucky enough to never have had this happen, realizing your only car was stolen, stripped, and abandoned feels really, really shitty. However, there are times in life when what you lose in material goods is nothing compared to what you gain in love for humanity. This is one of those times. » 3/13/15 2:48pm 3/13/15 2:48pm

Lamborghini Crashed And Abandoned On Dallas Highway Was A Rental

In a non-stunning bit of completely unsurprising news, it was revealed that the crashed and abandoned yellow Lamborghini in Dallas was, in fact, a rental car. That slight rocking motion you feel in the earth is all those heads nodding in understanding. Of course it was a rental. Now it all makes sense. » 3/09/15 10:40am 3/09/15 10:40am

Feds: Failed Charging Station Project Bilked Chicago Out Of Millions

California-based 350Green LLC was supposed to build an extensive network of car charging stations around Chicago and other cities, putting them ahead of the electric vehicle curve. Instead, federal investigators now say, the company's CEO and president defrauded Chicago and other governments out of nearly $3 million… » 3/05/15 8:10pm 3/05/15 8:10pm

Police: Atlanta Gang Members Used Fake Craigslist Car Ads To Rob Victims

There was a time when if you wanted to get a nice cheap car, Craigslist was the place to go. You can still find good values on CL, but you need to be careful out there. Police say Atlanta area gang members were setting up fake Craigslist ads for cars that didn't exist, in order to lure people and rob them. » 3/05/15 2:23pm 3/05/15 2:23pm