The other problem with the two-cycle Saabs was that, being piston-port engines, there was never a complete seal keeping air out of the crankcase.
Leave one parked for a month or so, and the air would work its way through the film of oil on its ball-bearing crankshaft. Rust would form, and that motor's life would be shortened to about a week of normal use.
We used to make good money starting up and driving Saabs for people who were out of town for the winter... #saab
Being affiliated with Saabs explains a great deal about Kurt Vonnegut. I have been afflicted by a Saab for about 7 years. Perhaps that explains a great deal about me. #saab
Kurt Vonnegut. Say it out loud, a couple of times. Vonnegut. You can't tell for sure if it's a foreign swear word, or a delicacy. Maybe it's a bit of both, something no sane man would eat but somewhere in the way back when, some poor bastard named Bjorn was pretty damned hungry in the dim end of the Arctic winter, and all he had left was whatever had gone into the slops bucket. And Mrs. Bjorn had added potatoes and seaweed and they had dinner. And it wasn't too bad, once you got past the fact of where it had all started, with Mrs. Bjorn digging in the slops bucket right before cooking. So they did it again, and eventually their grandkid, some little Bjornson grown to be a fine, handsome restaurateur had remembered that wonderful, esoteric dish from Grandmama's table, a taste delight you just couldn't get anywhere else. You couldn't get it anywhere else because it was cooked garbage, but he didn't know that. All he knew was, it was delicious.
SAAB means Svenska Aeroplan something something. It's a mouthful. A mouthful like a big steaming bite of hot cooked Vonnegut. If you worked there every day, you'd say SAAB too. Otherwise you'd be so tired from saying the name over and over answering the phone, you'd drop dead of terminal mouth fatigue before lunch.
Vonnegut. SAAB. Two names just meant for each other.
In my junior-year english honors class, we had to read 1984, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Brave New World, Slaughter House Five, and Breakfast of Champions back to back.
I have since come to hate the works of Orwell, Kesey, Huxley, and especially Vonnegut (I hated Slaughter House Five). #saab
@pauljones: I read Slapstick over the course of a week when I had the flu my sophomore year.
NyQuil should be a required supplement when reading Vonnegut #saab
@dedgsus: The Scarlet Letter was a drag, if only because there was too much descriptive language. I lived The Grapes of Wrath, though; it was the only reprieve I had while reading Salinger's Catcher In the Rye.
Add Salinger's name to the list of authors I don't like anymore. #saab
Not long ago a lady drove by our house and stopped. She went to the front of her minivan and produced--surprisingly to both her and to us--a small gray kitten, no more than three weeks old. My wife and I took care of the cat for a week before finding it a nice home with one of her coworkers.
In the mid-70s my parents had a similar incident with their own cat, who they pulled from the front part of the engine compartment, just inches from the belt array, after driving several miles. For the rest of that cat's 17 years, it was deathly afraid of ceiling fans.
My point in all this was...um...something about the SAAB device resembling both a Cat's Cradle and a Slaughterhouse. #saab
@Ash78 ain't got time to bleed: My grandparents have had barn cats for years, and they'd love to sleep on the toasty warm engine blocks. One black cat in particular was named "Stubby" due to an unfortunate contact between his tail and one of the moving engine parts... #saab
@MushyHeirloom: Seafoam in a vacuum hose works just as well, and you can pick and choose when to do it. I blanketed my entire suburban neighborhood one night.
The neighbors think we're really weird, and I tend to agree with them. #saab
@MushyHeirloom: Introducing diesel into the exhaust pipe is also supposed to work pretty well. Might gum up your Cat, so I'd pipe it in after that. But you'll need enough heat for it to smolder and smoke, so YMMV. #saab
Edited by Tomsk sez so long Ash78, and thanks for all the fish! at 10/30/09 2:18 PM
Tomsk sez so long Ash78, and thanks for all the fish! was starred
Tomsk sez so long Ash78, and thanks for all the fish! was unstarred
@KTown_WhiteBoy: I can definitely vouch for Seafoam. My next-door neighbor's 2-story house became COMPLETELY engulfed in smoke, all the way up to the roof. I felt kinda bad about that.
I still don't understand how enough gunk can accumulate to create such an amazing amount of smoke.. It really must be seen to be believed. #saab
@Scandinavian Flick: He first passed the robot to Dave Chappelle. When it rains, the drops courteously fall next to him, but never on him. Drivers alert HIM to poor road conditions. He is...The Most Interesting Barrel Man in the World! #trafficbarrelmonster
11/02/09
10/30/09
Hey Vonnegut!.....I'm stopping payment on the check! #saab
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You're Tall &Fat! You make those obnoxious commercials!
Yeah? Well your short and ugly.....gimme back my pen. #saab
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Now thats what I call marine biology! #saab
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Whats a hot tub without bubbles?
Bubbles! Get in here #saab
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Thanks for bringing this to our attention. #saab
10/30/09
Leave one parked for a month or so, and the air would work its way through the film of oil on its ball-bearing crankshaft. Rust would form, and that motor's life would be shortened to about a week of normal use.
We used to make good money starting up and driving Saabs for people who were out of town for the winter... #saab
10/30/09
Being affiliated with Saabs explains a great deal about Kurt Vonnegut. I have been afflicted by a Saab for about 7 years. Perhaps that explains a great deal about me. #saab
10/30/09
10/30/09
SAAB means Svenska Aeroplan something something. It's a mouthful. A mouthful like a big steaming bite of hot cooked Vonnegut. If you worked there every day, you'd say SAAB too. Otherwise you'd be so tired from saying the name over and over answering the phone, you'd drop dead of terminal mouth fatigue before lunch.
Vonnegut. SAAB. Two names just meant for each other.
10/30/09
I have since come to hate the works of Orwell, Kesey, Huxley, and especially Vonnegut (I hated Slaughter House Five). #saab
10/30/09
NyQuil should be a required supplement when reading Vonnegut #saab
10/30/09
10/30/09
You got off easy... my junior honors English class included such literary greats as The Scarlet Letter and The Grapes of Wrath. #saab
10/30/09
Add Salinger's name to the list of authors I don't like anymore. #saab
10/30/09
In the mid-70s my parents had a similar incident with their own cat, who they pulled from the front part of the engine compartment, just inches from the belt array, after driving several miles. For the rest of that cat's 17 years, it was deathly afraid of ceiling fans.
My point in all this was...um...something about the SAAB device resembling both a Cat's Cradle and a Slaughterhouse. #saab
10/30/09
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Probably not. One old, slow Euro four-door is enough. #saab
10/30/09
The neighbors think we're really weird, and I tend to agree with them. #saab
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I still don't understand how enough gunk can accumulate to create such an amazing amount of smoke.. It really must be seen to be believed. #saab
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10/30/09
@Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet: Gum up your cat??? #saab
10/31/09
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The rest of the description doesn't apply. #saab
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Listen: Automotive journalism could use a few Kurt Vonneguts. #saab
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I was trying to find a hieroglyphic image of this, but this picture is so much better anyway... #trafficbarrelmonster