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Detroit, 1:08 AM
Tue Dec 1
29 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #bmwconcept more →

    BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment

    BMW M-Division Working On New 8-Series

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    You're gonna enter the minivan market,

    People say they're gonna give you lots of money,

    Most Americans don't like wagons,

    Tell me it's cool,

    I just don't be-lieve it


    Sell out, with Bimmer today!

    Sell out, with them oh yeah!

    Rich pricks gonna give 'em lots of money and everything's gonna be all right!


    /Apologies to Reel Big Fish

     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Cognitive Friction Cognitive Friction
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    So...it's a Toyota Venza?
     Reply
    Cognitive Friction was starred Cognitive Friction was unstarred
    Image of Boosted Lego Wagon Boosted Lego Wagon
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    "Semi-command seating"? Perfect for middle-management douchebags. And who the fuck can't climb into an SUV or get a little cold when a hatch is open for five seconds? I guess the same people who worry about having too much "utility character".

    I know BMWs are supposed to be for pricks, but this new one's for pussies.
     Reply
    Boosted Lego Wagon was starred Boosted Lego Wagon was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @boosted-lego-wagon:


    I know BMWs are supposed to be for pricks, but this new one's for pussies.


    So this will be Angelina Jolie's new ride?

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of cafn8 cafn8
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    Every time I hear someone say coo-PAY, I just wanna punch him.
     Reply
    cafn8 was starred cafn8 was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @cafn8: Your medical insurance doesn't cover that?
     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    01/30/09

    @cafn8: American pronunciation, FUCK YEAH?
     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Miscellanea Miscellanea
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    This is a joke right? While they're at it, I want train horns, a glass dome, and a built-in microwave. Oh, and call it the Homer! Okay there Sport? Good.
     Reply
    Miscellanea was starred Miscellanea was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @Miscellanea, now on the main floor!: Canyanerro!!!
     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Miscellanea Miscellanea
    01/30/09

    @pauljones:


    The Canyanerro was just a mega SUV.


    The Homer was the car designed by Homer simpson for his long lost brother in the episode "Oh brother, where art thou."

     Reply
    Miscellanea was starred Miscellanea was unstarred
    Image of Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp
    01/30/09

    @Miscellanea, now on the main floor!: Yes, and it will cost $82000/
     Reply
    Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp was starred Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp was unstarred
    Image of TurboWeasel TurboWeasel
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    How many pricks does it fit?
     Reply
    TurboWeasel was starred TurboWeasel was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @TurboWeasel:


    Trick question, as none of the people that would drive it have pricks.

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    01/30/09

    @TurboWeasel: That depends. Can we puree them?
     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @Deartháir discusses blown trannies just for Google AdSense: Only if you have a GT-R engine.
     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of ThreeLitre ThreeLitre
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    Oh yay more brand dilution.


    Here's my plan. Get super rich. Buy a stakeholder share in BMW that gets me a seat on its board. Instate a new bylaw in BMW's charter that says for every cock-up, mass-marketed, fluffy, overweight, underselling, underperforming, non-motor-sports-oriented piece of tat like this the company creates, they have build and equally but oppositely excellent hardcore performance or uber GT machine - a la M3 CSL, new M1, new 8 series, or the Ghia concept.


    I mean, we should get our titties for all the tat they put out right?

     Reply
    ThreeLitre was starred ThreeLitre was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    01/30/09

    @nhubbell84: Works for me.
     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of bmoreDLJ bmoreDLJ
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    Sounds like a Malibu Maxx to me.


    Good job stealing UPS's awful whiteboard concept for a concept video.

     Reply
    bmoreDLJ was starred bmoreDLJ was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @bmoredlj: Except the Malilbu Maxx was cool.
     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Maymar Maymar
    01/30/09

    @pauljones: COTD!


    That's just hilorious (beyond hilarious).


    Although, a Maxx SS is tempting.

     Reply
    Maymar was starred Maymar was unstarred
    Image of UDMan UDMan
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    I seem to remember asking about this once.... Oh and look, here it is!

    [jalopnik.com]
     Reply
    UDMan was starred UDMan was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    I swear, one day I'm gonna be rich and make my dream come true: a 535xi Touring offroader, preference toward diesel if they ever offer it. Add 3" of lift (half suspension, half tires) on all-terrain rubber.


    Because I'm just messed up in the head like that. It would be worth it just to drive out to the public hunting grounds and see the looks on all the good old boys' faces when I roll down a rutted logging trail in my luxury wagon.

     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    01/30/09

    @Ash78: Sort of a "what would happen if AMC had produced luxury wagons"?
     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    01/30/09

    @engineerd - the comma-free edition: Precisely...but with bonus irony points because it's BMW, who doesn't have the utilitarian air of AMC.
     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp
    01/30/09

    @Ash78: So, basically, the republican equivalent of an Outback?
     Reply
    Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp was starred Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp was unstarred
    Image of jodark jodark
    01/30/09

    @Ash78: A Land Rover doesn't qualify for what you are looking for?
     Reply
    jodark was starred jodark was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    01/30/09

    @TV's Paul Y.: LOL...I suppose so. But remember, this is my rich-guy dream so the badge is the key here. Why let Volvo, Subie, and Audi own the realm of off-road wagons?
     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    01/30/09

    @jodark: Perhaps...a little tall and heavy, though. Plus, dime a dozen where I live. The key here is uniqueness. If I win the lottery, I won't own any off-the-shelf vehicles. They'll all be Frankensteins.
     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    01/30/09

    @TV's Paul Y.: That's funny.


    Are you a Yuppie that's looking for something a little more utilitarian than your basic 3-Series but you feel those other makes are beneath you?


    Do you live in Colorado and want to wear your political affiliation on your arm, but it doesn't start with a D?


    We have just the car for you!

     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @Ash78:


    You can take an Audi, Volvo, or Subie offroad?


    They are all good cars, but I wouldn't try off-roading in them...

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    01/30/09

    @pauljones: You can take anything offroad if you try hard enough. I wouldn't rock crawl or go mudding in them, but for general loose dirt and rock, I'd do it.


    If I were insanely rich, of course.

     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    01/30/09

    @pauljones: We used to offroad in a Datsun B210 in college. Loads of fun. My buddy paid $400 for the car. We would take it on trails that guys with nice 4WD vehicles wouldn't even go on. We usually got stuck, but that was all part of the adventure, and why we kept a come-along and chain in the back.
     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of 1300ccsoffury 1300ccsoffury
    01/30/09

    @Ash78: Truck nutz, you forgot truck nutz.
     Reply
    1300ccsoffury was starred 1300ccsoffury was unstarred
    Image of Six Flags Over Tomsk Six Flags Over Tomsk
    01/30/09

    @Ash78: Personally, I'd take a 535d Wagon (Hey, you said rich, right? Like, rich enough to bribe CARB and the EPA to look the other way?), add a couple inches of wheelbase aft of the B-pillars, raise the roof aft of the B-pillar with skylights on the front and sides of the raise sections, a forward-facing third row of seats, and a tailgate that has glass that rolls down into the tailgate, and the tailgate can either drop down or swing open to the left side.


    I'd call it...Der Vistakreuzer

     Reply
    Six Flags Over Tomsk was starred Six Flags Over Tomsk was unstarred
    Image of Maymar Maymar
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    I love (because I'm too shellshocked to feel anything else) that within 45 seconds, they admit that they should make another station wagon, but it would just make too much sense.
     Reply
    Maymar was starred Maymar was unstarred
    Image of Bumblebee Bumblebee
    01/30/09

    @Maymar: That was the most memorable part of this video for me as well: Wagons make all the sense in the world, BUT...
     Reply
    Bumblebee was starred Bumblebee was unstarred
    Image of engineerd engineerd
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    Its not a sedan, SUV or station wagon for "someone who needs a lot of equipment" with has semi-command seating.


    Translation: Its a minivan for tools who want to feel important.

     Reply
    engineerd was starred engineerd was unstarred
    Image of Thrashy, perpetual Minardi Thrashy, perpetual Minardi
    01/30/09

    @engineerd - the comma-free edition: Translation: Its a minivan for tools who want to feel important.


    Redundant. It's a BMW, so everything after "minivan" is a given.

     Reply
    Thrashy, perpetual Minardi was starred Thrashy, perpetual Minardi was unstarred
    Image of Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp
    01/30/09

    @Thrashy is tired of this off-season thing: Apparently, BMW's marketing department had a conversation to the effect of the following:


    "We're getting a lot of good focus group feedback, but there's a problem."


    "What's that?"


    "While we cater to self-important pompous-asses pretty well, we are neglecting a key market segment: self-important pompous-asses who speculate that they need to seat eight, even though they have two children, don't want to say that they drive a minivan, and aren't insecure enough to drive a truck."


    "So, a stretched x6?"


    "No. A fancy minivan that isn't called a minivan."

     Reply
    Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp was starred Paul Y. can't get in the club; gotta parking lot pimp was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    01/30/09

    In reply to BMW PAS Concept Video Invents Yet Another WTF-UV Segment
    I'm torn between making a Picture Pages reference or a Teen Girl Squad reference. I just seem to remember a BMW big-wig emphatically saying they would never build a minivan.
     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of TurboWeasel TurboWeasel
    01/30/09

    @Ash78:


    OK, so maybe they are rethinking that a little. But they want you to know that this is the Anna Nicole Smith of Minivans. You know - a little big, but in all the right ways, and just the thing for rich millionaires. I wonder if it can drive a straight line?

     Reply
    TurboWeasel was starred TurboWeasel was unstarred
    Image of pauljones pauljones
    01/30/09

    @TurboWeasel:

    An apt reference.


    It should also be about as stupid as Anna Nicole Smith as well, but with none her purpose for existence.


    Oh, wait....

     Reply
    pauljones was starred pauljones was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    01/30/09

    @Ash78: "It's not a minivan, it's a Progressive Activity Sedan!"


    Whatever, dude, a rose by any other name and all that.

     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
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