Why, even E30 pilots were eager to have the new Noch Ein Scheiß-E30 ("Yet Another Shitty E30") stencil applied to their rides. Not only that, Walker has printed up a bunch of T-shirts bearing an even better version of the new design... and you can't buy one! Only those at Carolina Motorsports Park in person tomorrow will have a shot at the Next Big Thing in racerwear.

So, with some translation help from Franzouse's Austrian friends, I made a stencil showing a Mr. Yuck-enhanced BMW logo and the words "Noch Einer Scheiß-E30" ("Yet Another Shitty E30"). Every E30 at LeMons South- and we're talking an endless parade here- got stenciled on every available surface, and most recipients were not very happy about it. The other teams were quite pleased, however, so it works out well. So, a message to you LeMons wannabes: before getting an E30, consider another car. Say, a Renault Fuego Turbo, or a VW Squareback!

We're not sure what the Body I looked like, but the Body II is an interesting mix of BMW Z8, Edsel and Playskool design languages that combine to create something distractingly unattractive. The vehicle looks especially awkward next to St. Basil's Cathedral, an example of good Russian design.

Designed by Russian design firm Cardi, underneath the yellow-green skin it is assumed the Body II is a BMW 325i (E36) equipped with the 196-horsepower version of the 2.5-liter inline-six. Cardi claims the vehicle is capable of reaching 62 mph from a cold start in 6.6 seconds with a speed-limited top speed of 155 mph.

We're not sure of the price tag, but if you have to ask... you're probably some rich Siberian oil oligarch with more money than taste and you don't care.

[CarScoop]

The pièce de résistance of the old 3-series was a highly detailed notebook that has record of every single gas fill-up. That notebook is so exhaustively thorough that for each fill-up it includes the date, mileage, dollars spent, exact amount of gasoline pumped, and even the name of the gas station where it was filled. That is some seriously obsessive documentation. And to think, the car was sold for just $900. Basically, the car was free with the purchase of the records. [VWvortex member mixedpartsbmx]

What we learned is that the end result of the last few years of horsepower wars is an increase in wheel diameter, decrease in aspect ratio, and rise in speed rating on tires mounted on vehicles rolling off assembly lines. Most amazing was the statistic that overall sales of Ultra High Performance [UHP] tires were up 68% since 2002. This either means people want their cars to look wicked cool, or they're driving the snot out if their machines and demanding more grip.

After class came recess. The first two events were to compare sets of tires and last to put the latest tire Bridgestone UHP tire to the test. Cars on deck were Pontiac G6 front spinners and BMW 325i rear drivers. Instructors rode along to prevent cone mowing provide helpful driving tips. The first test was a touring tire comparo with the BMW 325i. We had One and seven-eights rain-soaked laps to compare the Bridgestone Turanza with the the Michelin Energy MXV4 Plus. Very little difference was noted, but to be fair it's hard collect subtlety over less than four laps.

Next up was the Rent-a-Car Challenge Pontiac G6 entries, and a toss up between a Firestone Firehawk GT and a Goodyear Eagle ResponsEdge. The Firehawk handled things fairly well, but the Goodyears cut loose against the rev limiter on lead foot application of throttle. The last event was a relay of sorts with teams competing against each other for overall time. A single BMW 325i was mounted with Bridgestone RE-01R UHP tires for maximum hoonage. Our team came in second, but we got to learn a few things about running cones and choosing tires. We also learned that the drive-by-wire throttle combined with traction control on the 325i stinks.

At the end of the day choosing the right tire is about being honest with yourself about your driving style, and a compromise between tire compounds and construction. Wicked sticky UHP? Don't expect long tread life. All-season radial with quiet good manners and long wearing qualities? Don't expect super lateral grip or quick turn-in. The manufacturers are getting better at blurring the lines with high performance all-season radials and so on, but there is no one tire that does it all. And finally, because only 19% of Americans ever check their tire pressure we remind you to do so once a month. – Mike Bumbeck

DISCLOSURE: Bridgestone supplied the vehicles, road course, tires, and the water truck for the Drive & Learn event. Additional rain was provided by California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Related:
Tire Companies to Consumers: Ten Years and Out [Internal]