Car: Tata Nano
Place on the list: 49
Reason it's BS: The Tata Nano isn't ugly, it's simply space efficient. Given the constraints of price, footprint and upright packaging, it pulls off the microcar shape rather well actually. There are certainly uglier cars on the market in India and China right now.

Car: Ferrari Enzo
Place on the list: 42
Reason it's BS: Save the Enzo's! The Ferrari Enzo wasn't built to win beauty contests, it was designed to showcase Ferrari's F1 racing pedigree and tie those techniques and technologies to their road cars. Form follows function and while it's not classically beautiful it's fast and unique. In any case compared to the Mondial, it's a supermodel.

Car: Plymouth Prowler
Place on the list: 31
Reason it's BS: When the Prowler was introduced in 1997, it was the coolest car on the planet, bar none. Unfortunately it was packed with an engine from an Intrepid, and suspension tuning best described as one-of-a-kind. Despite its glaring flaws and how you might feel about the retro-mod style, it was certainly a car that got people looking. When you spot them today, you turn and look longer than you should, admit it.

Car: Lamborghini LM002
Place on the list: 25
Reason it's BS: BusnessWeek complains about "geometric doors, angular fenders, and a busy hood." Perhaps they forgot it was introduced in 1986 when everything cool was geometric, angular and busy. They don't even mention the fire-breathing (for the 80's) 5.0 liter V12 from the Countach under the hood and the take-no-prisoners attitude. You don't get a moniker like "Rambo Lambo" by being lame.

Car: DeLorean DMC-12
Place on the list: 20
Reason it's BS: Are they joking? The DMC-12? Of any car from the 80's this one still plays well on public streets. The stainless steel body is unique, the ridiculously heavy gullwing doors draw crowds and the fastback style screams 80's coke dealer, and nobody was more up on all things stylish in the 80's than coke dealers.

Car:Subaru Brat
Place on the list: 18
Reason it's BS: Apparently BusinessWeek's too busy adjusting its top hat and monocle to enjoy the finer things in life, like riding in the jump seats in the Subaru Brat's cargo bed. It's even got decent capability for an early soft-roader.

Car: Aston Martin Lagonda
Place on the list: 16
Reason it's BS: Oh come on? Really? The Lagonda? It pushed the limit of longer, lower, wider to absurdity and mixed in out of control braggadocio. By all account it was admittedly every bit British reliable, but who cares? Hire a team of mules to pull it around town as you look out upon the unwashed masses from your obnoxious 80's chariot.

Car:Volvo 240
Place on the list: 13
Reason it's BS: Don't you go messing with the 240 BusinessWeek. You have no idea the depths of Volvo love out there, especially by the boxy-but-trusty 240. We dare you, dare you to find a more dedicated owner base. Fine, it's a bit boring, but so is the Camry and that's not on the list. We actually find it handsome, especially with the quad headlight design. You best watch your back BusinessWeek.

Car: Bricklin SV1
Place on the list: 11
Reason it's BS: Okay, this one's a bit on the ugly side, if you look only at the outside, but it was one of the first cars to push the idea of safety in a sports car, even though because of its heavy construction it wasn't particularly sporty. It's got a logical shape, and the nose is designed to prevent expensive damage repairs. Sure it's a bit cluttered in places, but come on, gull-wing doors.

Car:Chevy El Camino
Place on the list: 1
Reason it's BS: Number one. They've got to be kidding. Two words on this one: Screw. Off. First of all, lumping the entire series into one big pile is just plain ignorant. Secondly, it's rude. The El Camino from the outset was a looker and stayed a dynamite design all the way until the fall in the 70s. But then again, everything was pretty fug in the 70s. If they even try to say the 1960 and 1972 were ugly, they might get a Jalopnik-shaped shoe to the butt.

Photo credit: SuperChevy

Voodoojoo has done a great writeup to accompany his photographs- which should serve as examples to aspiring DOTSBE photographers- so we'll cut straight to it:

While I've been living in lower Manhattan, I've seen lots and lots of cool cars. A Mustard 70s Gran Torino, a green 70s Charger parked next to a white 67 Charger parked next to a BMW 3.0 CS next to a mint 1958 Corvette next to a red Fiat X1/9 riced out with fake chrome vents, wide arches, a giant spoiler and plenty of stickers ( I walk past a pretty cool shop on my way to class). I shouldn't forget the 40s Plymouth, the white-and-blue Cobra II, the 61 Eldorado, the 356, the 2CV, the Saab 99. I probably have more three pointed stars on my hard drive than I do essays, but few of them get sent over to your inbox because they just don't seem...extraordinary enough. Over the past few days, things have been different. While the '64 Riviera that I spotted made me smile, I shouted "holy shit" when I saw that double-chevron sticking out from the rusted behind of this DS and the Lagonda made my heartbeat irregular. Judging by my general reaction, I figured you might be interested in these pictures, and maybe a bit of a story.

I saw this Lagonda for about two seconds over a year ago walking out of my dorm and after recovering my probably embarrassing state of shock, I figured that it would be last time I ever saw that carved arrow figure rumble around the corner, but today, just a day and a half after seeing a flat to the floor Citroen, the Lagonda showed itself once more. While nearly everyone on the street asked me about the Trabant I stood next to, only one person stopped at the Aston Martin. "How much?" he asked, which seemed like a silly question to me, as I figured the electronics would short out before the previous owner had even finished counting the money you might as well have lit on fire. That is, until he mentioned he was in the market for a Testarossa. After perhaps cruelly advising him to buy a 70s Maserati instead, I went on and photographed what may be the only Lagonda I will ever see.

This DS was going to be sent in on its own with a short primer entitled 'How to get on DOTS - Step One: Find a Citroen DS'. It looks like it has all but given up on life, what with its tired, mismatched panels and reclining ride height. Once I tried to explain to my dad what I loved about Citroens, and I'm pretty sure I just babbled incoherently for a while, because to this day, there's something about them that goes beyond my capacities for explanation, something I find true of both of these cars. There's something about them, something spectacular. When I see them, my head starts to connect people and places, times and cultures. And while looking at these cars starts me to babble on endlessly, I still remain amazed - how the hell can these cars still be running? This is a clonked-out, beater Citroen DS. That shouldn't happen. An Aston Martin Lagonda being actually driven at all shouldn't happen. That I got to see them, that I had a camera. I'm counting myself lucky.

When we first heard of a revival of the storied luxury brand, Lagonda, we envisioned big, classy exotic sedans with ridiculous proportions and enough sex appeal to spare. The last thing we expected to see was an SUV, no matter how intensely styled it may be. Aston Martin states in their excuse ahem, press release, that the Lagonda Concept's intention is to enter the marketplace with a 'unique performance avant-garde luxury product.' Wait a minute. Didn't Porsche already do this? Something about a pepper of some sort? It might just be our imagination, but this is hardly a unique vehicle. For Aston Martin yes, but for the world - No.

Getting past our initial disappointment will be difficult, but the overall form of the Lagonda Concept is quite beautiful, with the exception of the 'Hannibal Lectre' grille, as it shall be called from this point on. The four-wheel drive, four-seat Lagonda does have some redeeming qualities about it, most notably being the unconventional rear section that appears to be more Bentley than anything else. If you cover your hand over everything from the belt-line down, the Lagonda Concept has a hint of SAAB in it, but that's not necessarily a bad thing as they've basically created a design that SAAB should have tried with the 9-4X.

Unfortunately, as one brand slowly kills itself another will be born and according to Aston Martin Lagonda Chief Executive, Dr Ulrich Bez:

"The Lagonda is the luxury car of the future."

If this is true, then we welcome back the Lagonda nameplate, but please bring us some of those wildly proportioned exotic sedans that we mentioned earlier and don't just re-badge the Rapide while doing so. Thanks Aston!

Aston Martin Lagonda Press Release (Or How Aston Martin Ruined Our Dreams):

Lagonda: Revival of a Luxury Brand

Aston Martin is proud to announce the return of Lagonda, one of the oldest and most iconic names in luxury car manufacturing.

The revival of Lagonda fulfils a long-term vision and will bring performance luxury into new markets and territories around the world for Aston Martin Lagonda. Ultimately, Lagonda will be a strong presence in 100 global territories, vastly increasing the global brand reach of the company and extending to new customers.

Reflecting its remarkable history, the brand will return to Russia, enter emerging markets in the Middle East, South America, India and China, as well as responding to demand from the dynamic, innovation-focused consumers of Europe, North America and the Far East.

"The Lagonda is the luxury car of the future," says Aston Martin Lagonda Chief Executive, Dr Ulrich Bez, "a combination of total usability, a new form and innovative new technology and materials."

Lagonda is committed to innovative new propulsion technologies, new materials and elegant forms, creating a functional luxury for the near future. Critically, the brand will allow the exploration of alternative powertrain solutions including flexfuel, low emission diesel and hybrid systems. Lagonda will epitomise the intersection of craft, design and technology with Aston Martin's established high performance expertise.

The intention is for Lagonda to enter the market place with a unique performance avant-garde luxury product, a vehicle that combines exceptional ability with unsurpassed elegance, inside and out. The LAGONDA CONCEPT is a powerful four-wheel drive, four-seater car that will satisfy the most discerning and demanding owner.

"An Aston Martin is an authentic, pure sports car," says Dr Ulrich Bez, "but Lagonda is something else, a new brand that will reach into new markets. Lagonda will create a new kind of customer relationship, instilling the spirit of travel, adventure and style into a single, formidable package.

Photo Credit: Autoblog.it

[via Aston Martin]

Actually, I didn't find it. Ian Merritt, from Kicking Tires, was working on a story when he, too, was called away by the sight of all 17+ feet of Lagondaness. Fortunately, Ian always has a camera with him. Unaware that I had spent more than a year stalking it, Ian sent the pictures over thinking we'd enjoy them. The plates on the car were blurred but I had memorized the custom inscription. I emailed Ian. Was this SALIVA? It was! So, with an assist from our buddies at Cars.com, here are some great photos of this ridiculous and wonderful car.

You want a genuine right-hand-drive, straight-from-Japan R33 Skyline GT-R, don't you? Of course you do! A 250-horse twin-turbocharged 2.6 six (which is eager to be boosted up to ridiculous power numbers using off-the-shelf components and well-known tuning tricks), all-wheel-drive, and JDM-only prestige that will leave jaws dropping in your wake. You could take your rapidly-eroding dollars and attempt to put together enough yen to get one shipped over from Japan... or you could buy this 1996 Skyline GT-R (go here if the ad disappears) right here in California! No, you're not allowed to buy it just for the RB25DETT engine (although we'd certainly approve of a Honey Bee B210 with such a powerplant)- you need to fix this car! We don't know how much the seller wants for it, but you can tell by his tone ("Don't waste my time. Serious buyers only!") that he or she means business. It's only got 10,000 kilometers on the clock, so the question is: was it hooned to death and wrecked in Japan, or was it hooned to death and wrecked over here? You'll have plenty of time to contemplate that question as you deal with layer after layer of state and federal bureaucrats, all of whom will disapprove strongly of the idea of you registering your Skyline for street use in North America, and all of whom will treat the car's sketchy lien-sale paperwork as being moderately radioactive. Oh yeah, the seller can't say whether it runs or not! Thanks to Jonee for the tip.

The last time we saw a Lagonda in this series, it stomped an Alfa Romeo Giulietta into a heap of rusty scrap metal in the poll. We thought maybe we'd save this '83 Lagonda to do battle with a Citroën, but then figured the horror of registering the Skyline, coupled with undeniable coolness, likely puts it on the same level as the Aston Martin. The best thing about this Lagonda is that it has the full-on electronic dash, which makes ordinary Lucas Electrics look downright bulletproof. And you know how much its price tag was in 1983? $150,000, which seems utter lunacy even before you convert it to the 2008 inflation-adjusted figure of $323,529. This car's auction has no reserve and is currently bid up to just $4,000; we may be looking at the ultimate in car-value depreciation here... which is bad news for the seller, but great news for you! Now, those of you who don't know Malaise Era British cars may be scoffing at the idea of this beautiful, fully-functional Aston Martin as a "project" car, but we guarantee it was a Hell Project the moment it left the assembly line (if not before then). You'll be lucky to get it up your driveway and soon-to-be sulfurous garage under its own power (four carburetors on a British DOHC smog V8- cue evil laughter). Thanks to UDMan for yet another great tip!

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Here's a perfect example of the type of asks the Sultan would make to automakers. The V8 Vantage of the '90s was an awesome piece of brutish British muscle. In our mind, the only way to make it more badass was to add more doors, and it would appear the Sultan was of the same mindset as the Brunei royals ordered Aston Martin to convert some Virages to Lagonda-badged sedans and wagons. Some were even converted to Vantage technical specification.

Done in-house by Aston Martin Works, the Aston Martin Special Series 1 was styled to look like the classic DB4 Zagato. But while the old DB4 had to make do with an inline-six, the Series 1 rode on a V8 Vantage platform complete with twin-supercharged V8 power. Because when you've got the money to make it happen, you make it happen.

Where the Series 1 was pure retro, the Series 2 was the culmination of contemporary. Striking a nice balance between elegant and aggressive, the Special Series 2 was also believed to be based on the V8 Vantage. Sounds like a nice way to counter-balance the design of the Series 1. Or at least the Sultan seemed to think so.

The AM3 was the most non-traditional design of all the custom Astons. Perhaps this was because it was bodied by Pininfarina in Italy. The lights were given a smoked treatment to blend in with the black plastic front fascia. And like all great contemporary designs, it still looks modern today.

Although the AM4 was much more conservative than the AM3, it too was designed by the denizens of the clay workshops of Pininfarina. Also on the V8 Vantage chassis, we think it looks something like a big DB7.

Before the Porsche Cayenne or Cadillac Escalade, if you wanted an SUV with a stuck-up sense of over-built purpose, there was only the Range Rover. Unless you were the Sultan, in which case you'd commission Bentley to construct a batch of SUVs with a unique Bentley chassis and Range Rover 4WD systems. At least they didn't ride on 24" spinners.

Originally the Java was a concept to show what a Bentley based on a BMW 5-series might look like. Apparently the Brunei royals liked it enough they had Bentley build a convertible version of the show car. The gleefully exorbitant brand-bastard madness didn't stop with the drop-top, as it appears he had some wagons built as well. Though from what we understand they didn't actually use a BMW for these functioning examples of concept gone crazy.

We told you this guy loved wagons — and an extended-end Bentley is certainly an expensive way to show that love. While we're not too keen on the I'm-Lovin'-It McDonald's themed interior on the jaundice-colored Bentley, we adore the styling on the silver one. What's better, if you believe the badges, these were equipped with four-wheel-drive. Think of it as a Volvo wagon — except symbolizing the opposite of every ideal of the Swedish brand.

Back when all Bentleys were styled starting with Lego models, the Rapier was designed to be a modern and forward-thinking interpretation of the brand. The flowing lines are still more sleek that the current lineup from Crewe. Although now, the front view might cause people to initially confuse it for a Jaguar XF.

The BMW 850CSi was the best you could get from Bavaria, but that wasn't good enough for the Sultan. This version of the big coupe is tuned by Alpina and called the B12. In addition to those fancy stripes and vents, the car had a V12 pumping out about 350 HP.

Yes, that's right, with a 16-cylinder engine made from two V8s stuck together, the Cizeta-Moroder V16T was one of the most ambitious hypercar projects ever attempted. The engine was mounted in a Fiero-like sideways fashion, instead of the longitudinal way you'd expect in a Lamborghini. Even the headlights were over-the-top, it had two flip-up lamps on each side.

Known as the Dauer 962 Le Mans, it's an extremely limited edition street-version of Porsche's dominant 962 race car. It's also said up to five of these once lived in the Brunei royal garage, but we're told this yellow example was apparently the favorite. At one time, they were arguably the fastest road cars in the world. That is, if you actually consider them "road cars."

The Ferrari 456 is arguably the most elegant car to come from Maranello in recent years. That being said — why stop with mere elegance when you're a Sultan. No, a Sultan demands indulgence. Which we're assuming is why he built himself a four-door sedan and wagon version of the Italian stallion. With a wave of his hand, he commissioned design-shop Pininfarina to build some super-sized versions. We're even told the Sultan reportedly had them set up shop on the royal grounds, just for this sort of special project. Must have been why they tossed in that sexy drop-top 456 Spider at no extra cost.

The Ferrari F40 only came in red, right? Not if you're the Sultan. It's ironic to see the most exciting car of its day in the most drab color imaginable, but we think it's awesome.

Obviously, this wasn't the only McLaren in the garage, but where else are you gonna find one in yellow? And we all know what yellow is good for. We can see it now — the Sultan cruising — one chick magnetically sealed to each side due to the raw yellow magnetism of the McLaren. Yeah, or else he had so many credit cards in his pockets, the stripes on the back actually became magnetized. Whatever the reason, we're assuming the man doesn't need a yellow McLaren. But we're also assuming that wasn't his reasoning behind the color either.

Essentially a re-bodied SL, the Argento Vivo design was originally a Honda concept car by the same name. But what sets a Honda concept apart from a Mercedes is all about what's under the hood. In this case, an AMG 7.3-liter V12, the same engine used in the Pagani Zonda.

Yet another awesome wagon, the special S-class Touring model was designed just for the Sultan. Of course, it never hurts to have some extra power to drag around all that extra cargo room, so AMG installed another one of their 7.3-liter V12s under that pretty hood.

No, that's not just a sheet-metal restoration. It's been restored by HWA, the people that made the CLK-GTR, and was given modern underpinnings from a (then) new S-class. Style of the old, power of the new. We like that combination.

The Sultan didn't just use HWA for the 600 above. Like many tuning houses, the Sultan of cars had them take a swing at a few four-wheeled wonders. Like the Mercedes above. Sure, it looks just like a normal 300 SL, but it's got a modern drivetrain. That gives it plenty of "go" to match the gullwing "show."

Ok, so this wasn't actually called "The Panty Dropper" or "The Shaggin Wagon" but it might as well have been. Why else would you have a yellow Mercedes Sprinter with a red interior? We're wondering if those seats fold down conversion van-style. What happens in Brunei, stays in Brunei, right?

What could be better than the Rambo-Lambo? How about a wagon version? Just looking at this thing pumps enough testosterone into our system to make us want to go on a Lion-hunting expedition. In the middle of a war zone.

Think Jaguar's XJ220 is just too ugly? Of course not. So why would you have one re-styled by Pininfarina? Because you can, and because the end result looks absolutely fantastic.

Nowadays, it's common to see stretched Escalades and Navaigators, but this Range Rover was stretched long before big SUVs were played out. We wonder how it'd do off-road? Our bet is we'd find out right about the first time we tried to scale a rock taller than a foot.

Styled by Bertone, this one-off Roller dubbed the Majestic is distinct enough to be noticed by those in the know, but subtle enough to be overlooked by most everyone else. Much less vulgar than say, a current Phantom.

What collection would be complete without a basic stretched Rolls-Royce? We're sure the Sultan had plenty of limos like these, but something about this Roller just gives it the quintessential "rich guy" flavor.

Photo Credit: Supercars.net
[Information gathered from a variety of sources including but not limited to: AstonMartins.com, bentleyspotting.com, benzworld.org, classicdriver.com]