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Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance

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Novaload
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
I'm more worried that the police couldn't figure where the gas pump came from. Somewhere there's a gas station that doesn't know it's missing a pump? Didn't notice one getting torn loose?
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DoctorNine
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
Just another silly wench who's Loved and Lost Again...

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Graverobber
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
Hopefully she will get out soon and can get back to her day job; turning people into stone.
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OldeEnglishD
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
Seeings how she is driving a Lesbaru, that's probably the only hose she has had stuck in her in a while....
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mytdawg
12/03/08

@OldeEnglishD misses Polar: No wonder it got stuck.
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Hot_Carl
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
Anyone else besides me that would totally dangle some bait in front of that cougar if we met at a bar? Take me home in your Outback!
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Skunky
12/03/08

@Hot_Carl: By bait I'm assuming you mean a bottle of Stoli.
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Ash78, cube farmer
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
I liked Ozzy better before the plastic surgery, botox, collagen, and makeup.

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DonSchenck
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: Ozzy's 60 today! Happy Birthday Ozzie!
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Ash78, cube farmer
12/03/08

@DonSchenck: Nice, what a coincidence!

Gotta email my dad, whose also 60 and a big Ozzy/Sabbath fan.
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LTDScott
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
Wait, this is real? Sounds like "Reno 911" may only be partially fictional.
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Maxichamp
12/03/08

@LTDScott, Porcubimmer pilot: I volunteered in Reno for nearly a week before/during the election. There are all sorts of interesting people in Reno.

The cops, on the other hand, are all business.
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Ash78, cube farmer
12/03/08

@Maxichamp: The cops, on the other hand, are all business.

So the eponymous TV show is not really a documentary?
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Maxichamp
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: Sadly, no.
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ciscokidinsf
12/03/08

@Maxichamp: The new season of Reno 911 better feature the gang trying to arrest a gang of 'British Hooligans' driving fast cars in Washoe County (Jezza, Hamster and Slow) That'd be awesome.
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Maxichamp
12/03/08

@ciscokidinsf: I can just picture Clementine hitting on Hamster.
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IN THE FACE!
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
This is just a teaser for the new episode of Reno 911 right?
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Ash78, cube farmer
12/03/08

In reply to Drunk Woman Pulled Over By Ambulance
It what makes a woman driver, a woman driver

(btw, I was awarded worst comment of the day on Jezebel yesterday. That's something nice they do for people like me.)
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Timtoolman, sporadically speaking
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: And now Gawkwer Media thanks you for sending all of us Jalops over to their sister site to see...
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Ash78, cube farmer
12/03/08

@timtoolman: Here you go:

[jezebel.com]
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Serious Mopar Jones- Incurable
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: Pfft- whatta buncha crybabies. I'm as enlightened as the next guy, but c'mon- funny is like a box of chocolates: full of "food-grade petroleum byproducts", hideously overpriced much like a diamond, yet 3500% less likely to get you, um, "backstage passes".

Wait.

At any rate, WCOTD is a good idea- That I might have a shot at.
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MyDragonLovesBruce - now with witty suffix!
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: What the hell were you doing reading Jezebel?
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sos10
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: Why wondering in a women website?
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SuzanneD
12/03/08

Last night I watched a woman on her cell phone parallel park her monstrously huge SUV literally - LITERALLY - 3 feet from the curb. Still yakking on her cell, she then proceeded to LEAVE IT PARKED AS IT WAS, with at least 30% of the vehicle jutting out into oncoming traffic (WITH THE ENGINE STILL RUNNING) while she ran into Wawa for a cup of coffee.

Women cannot drive for shit (myself politely excluded).
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Ash78, cube farmer
12/03/08

@MyDragonLovesBruce: I can't believe you're the first to ask.

Jalop and Consumerist have been loading really slowly the last couple days, so I thought I'd venture to the dark side. They update their stories about every 5-10 minutes, so it's quick and easy reading fodder. But I doubt I'll be visiting anymore. I think they discovered I'm a guy.
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mytdawg
12/03/08

@SuzanneD: Women that are preoccupied with everything else but driving suck at driving. But damn it's obvious when they aren't paying attention. Kind of like bikers, you get an image of guys that would stab you for a sandwich but 90%+ would fix your flat tire and make you a sandwich. But that other 10% is what you fixate on.
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Timtoolman, sporadically speaking
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: Speaking of...what happened to Fleshbot? Too racy for the "consumerist?"
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SuzanneD
12/03/08

@mytdawg: I agree with your characterization of bikers, but I firmly maintain that even women completely focused on the task at hand are still completely inept behind the wheel. They drive the same way they go through life: expecting rules to be bent for them simply because they can fluff their hair and bat their eyelashes.

/end rant.
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Gearhead_42 - Nibbles ate my garage!
12/03/08

@timtoolman: Oh, it's still around... notice it's not linked from any gawker sites anymore though.

Not that I ever click that link or anything mind...
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Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing
12/03/08

@Gearhead_42: I hadn't noticed that Fleshbot disappeared from the Jalopnik masthead until just now... I have my bookmarks, and they all still work and the posts are current.
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Maymar
12/03/08

@SuzanneD: For what it's worth, my girlfriend is a better driver than my two best male friends (one's good, but agressive, and the other is ADD and hates cars). I like to think I'm better than her, but I also drive about 30,000kms per year compared to her occational in-town trip.

@delsydsoftware: COTD! Seriously, I'm in public, I have to stifle myself from laughing. I need to start using "squirrel semen" to describe attributes of different cars (those brakes are mushy like...).
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mytdawg
12/03/08

@SuzanneD: Well it works... ;-)
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dontknoa
12/03/08

@SuzanneD: Wow are you really a chick? You seem to be grounded in reality a little too firmly for a female...
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Tasty Cheese
12/03/08

@SuzanneD: I'd also like to step up to exclude myself from the shit-driving-women category. I've driven in 3 LeMons races, that automatically excludes me, right? Right?

And here's a guy who can't park for shit, either:

I'm non-discriminatory. Anyone can be a sucky driver. Plus, let's not forget old folks. Merging onto the freeway at 30 mph in an '81 Oldsmobile 88 with my grandpa behind the wheel? Terrifying. Guys from Japan, especially ones who work at OEMs and are responsible for the R&D of vehicles, are also extremely bad.
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mytdawg
12/03/08

@dontknoa: I don't think the modern enlightened female appreciates the term "chick". Try "broad" instead... (runs and ducks).
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MushyHeirloom
12/03/08

@The Name's Ash78, Housewares: The woman who requested a disemvowelment is just pissed that she can't find where she parked her Outback.
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MushyHeirloom
12/03/08

@SuzanneD: Err, pull over safely and move it for her? Into a lamppost?

If it wasn't illegal, I'd definitely condone it.
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MushyHeirloom
12/03/08

@middyz: The white car looks like a mid-'90s Alfa-Romeo Sentra.
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