You Can See Her Stripes But You Know She's Clean: Tiger Attacks Cars

A belligerent she-tiger, apparently angry that a motorist took the life of one of her cubs, has gone about attacking motor vehicles in eastern Russia. The big cat is one of about 450 tigers remaining in the Maritime and the Khabarovsk regions, and has been seen on the side of the road with a dead cub in her jaws,… »12/06/06 1:30pm12/06/06 1:30pm

Redneck Yellowjackets Practice Urban Renewal In '55 Chevy

Much like dogs love trucks, yellowjackets apparently love cars. We discovered this the hard way a few years back when a mean-spirited stinging insect jabbed us in the back while we were leaving a stoplight, causing us nearly to put our old Legend into a hedge. Nevertheless, we're once again quite stoked that we don't… »8/23/06 9:15pm8/23/06 9:15pm

Hot Animal Machine: Pets-In-Cars Law to Go Before Schwarzenneger

Senate Bill 1806, written by Democratic State Senator Liz Figueroa, is headed to Ahnulds desk. The bill, if the Governator signs it into law, would impose a fines of up to $500 and as much as six months in jail for leaving an animal in a hot car. Studies have show that in-car temperatures can hit 132 degrees… »8/16/06 3:30pm8/16/06 3:30pm

Note to 'American Idol' Prospects: Cowell Doesn't Appreciate Car-Broiled Dog

As an odd, cred-killing side-note, one Jalopnik was actually in both the El Camino High Madrigal choir, as well as the Central Valley Regional Honor Choir with American Idol contestant Mandisa Hundley, who is a very nice woman and only accused us of being a racist once, when we, as a part of a pre-Homecoming stunt,… »8/14/06 11:00pm8/14/06 11:00pm

Colbert's Worst Nightmare: Bear Cub Eats Dinner In Back Seat Of Vintage Red Buick; Washes It Down With Jack Daniel's And Absolut

We, like Colbert Report host Stephen Colbert, have a fear bordering on terror when it comes to bears. The thought of what happened to the owners of a vintage red 1964 Buick convertible this holiday weekend over in Lake Tahoe gives us the chills. A hungry bear cub decided a little pick-a-nick basket was the way to go,… »7/05/06 10:00am7/05/06 10:00am

Flags and Emblems: Banner-Carrying Cars Spooking Horses in UK

When was the last time you were in a locale that boasted an Equine Liaison Officer? Well, rural Hampshire, England has one by the name of Derek Grist, and he's not exactly thrilled with all of the cars flying the Union Jack during the runup to the World Cup. Why? Because the waving flags apparently have the capacity… »6/01/06 12:08am6/01/06 12:08am

The Roar of the Masses Could Be Farts, Part 4: Fuel From Feces!

Anyone who's ever held a lighter too close to one's anus after a hearty meal in San Francisco's Mission District knows what we're about to tell you the ass expels energy. What's more, bovines, huge animals that they are and quite populous in number expel a lot of potential energy out the ol' bootyhole. Now, all of… »1/20/06 9:59pm1/20/06 9:59pm