Those of you who come to 24 Hours Of LeMons races already know Jeff; he's the guy who makes the LeMons carnival function correctly when it clanks into your town. A former pro racer who got his start in his early teens with a hooned-out autocross MGB, Jeff now prefers Italian iron. Remember his DOTS '65 Giulia SS?

When he first obtained the Cortina, it was powered by a semi-hot Fiat Twin Cam engine. After the punishment of quite a few rallies, the ol' Fiat gave up. What next? Hmmm... you can get wrecked Honda S2000s pretty cheap these days!




My crappy photographs don't really convey the super-slick setup of this Anglo-Japanese monster; Jeff was a fabricatin' demon to get this Hell Project together. All the Honda wiring and ECMs are in use, and it runs fine; all that remains is a bit of brake work and a couple of thousand little details. 1,800 pounds and 247 horsepower is a combination that sounds pretty good to us! And with legendary wheelman Jeff at the controls, it's gonna be terrifying a blast! Anyone who has ridden with this guy in a rental car on a race track can vouch for that. Did you know that a Honda CR-V can do 110+ at Carolina Motorsports Park? Neither did I!

And that's just the beginning of the fun stuff to be found under Jeff's house. The entire footprint of Chez Jeff's Oakland abode is taken up by an 1,800 square foot garage. For starters, here's Mrs. Jeff's ride: a lowered 1966 VW Transporter with a built-to-the-hilt 2,000cc engine.

Just inside, you'll find this 1971 Fiat 850 Sport Coupe, also belonging to Jeff's SO; don't those Alfa wheels look good on it?

When she doesn't feel like driving the bus or the Fiat, there's always her '69 Alfa Romeo Duetto.

Sometimes Jeff needs to change things up with this 1971 BMW 2002Tii with "lots of mods."

Tired of four wheels? Hop on one of the Lambrettas!

Tired of internal combustion? Hop on a Bianchi!

We all thought it was a pretty good score when Seatbelt123 picked up two Alfa Romeo Milanos for his 24 Hours Of LeMons team for just $299. No doubt many an Alfa lover started eyeballing that empty spot in the garage and began a search for similar deals. Guess what? We've found what (at first glance appears to be) an even better Alfa deal, and it will not only fill up your garage but the driveway and maybe front yard as well! Would you believe an '87 Milano, a '78 Alfetta, and a '69 Duetto (go here if the ad disappears) for the incredible price of $750? No, and we didn't, either; of course it's really a classic Craigslist bait-and-switch arrangement hiding a $9,850 price tag. But still, with the economy melting down and the value of project Alfas melting like reserves in a bank run, we're pretty sure the actual selling price will be much, much lower. There is no information about running condition or any problems these cars might have (other than the ominous statement "Needs a little attention" applied to the Alfetta), but you can count on decades months of Alfa torture fun when you take on these projects! Thanks to Narf, BZR, and UDMan for the tip.

You like those Alfa Romeos but the scam-esque nature of the phony price has you refusing to do business with the seller for ethical reasons? We understand. Besides, Italian cars are so obvious, what with all their histrionics and castor-oil-down-the-throat machismo. French cars! That's what you need! In fact, forget about those Renaults and Peugeots and even Simcas and go straight for the clear-quill, 200-proof goods: Citroën. Normally, even a pretty rough, hasn't-run-in-years Citroën goes for at least two grand, but magical things happen to project-car prices during a Financiapocalypse- how about four 1960-66 Citroën ID19s (go here if the ad disappears) for just one thin grand? The seller doesn't bother to provide any real description, other than "Between the 4 there are 3 engines. You could probably make 2 complete cars or make 1 with lots of spare parts," but who cares? You could make one quasi-nice runner with all this stuff and the first-ever 24 Hours Of LeMons Citroën with whatever's left over! Please, one of you Oregon readers needs to buy these cars!

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.