Jalopnik 
Enter your username and password.
Detroit, 1:45 PM
Sat Nov 21
29 posts in the last 24 hours
Tip your editors:
tips@jalopnik.com
Editor-in-Chief:
Ray Wert | Email | AIM
Road Test Editor:
Wes Siler | Email
Weekend Editor:
Murilee Martin | Email
Associate Editor - Houston:
Matt Hardigree
Associate Editor - Detroit:
Ben Wojdyla
Editor-at-Large:
Mike Spinelli
Contributors:
Mark Arnold
John Krewson | Email
Andy Didorosi
Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
As long as she scores a 7 or above, or, alternatively, a 5-6 and brings a six-pack of beer with her.
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
Frat boys rejoice - you can drive a Tau, Lambda, Tau for a combined total of only $180,000! Or you can buy a $35 hoodie.
03/17/09
A heart click for the alternative ending.
03/17/09
The all-new Hyundai EQUUS will be offered for just under $45,000 and ranging up to roughly $74,000. The starting price is less than half the original price target, proving this car is only half as cool as anticipated.
To up the cool-factor, a limo-ized version will be available later this year with the 5L Tau engine.
Initially, the EQUUS will be offered with the 213kW and 358Nm Lambda 3.8L V6 or the 269 kW and 439 Nm Tau 4.6L V8. Strange how closely the displacements of Hyundai engines match those of Ford engines.
EQUUS is targeted at short Asian women and will feature an electric parking brake that automatically disengages when the gear selector is put in D. We know our target market cannot be bothered with small details like releasing the parking brake.
Speaking of brakes, we know our target market can't be bothered with using the brakes at all and enjoys massages, so we have a "safety" feature called the Pre-Safety System which automatically applies the brakes, triggers a flashing light, and a vibration in the seatbelt.
Video cameras in teh back and sides will ensure the our target market does not smash into crap while parking.
Finally, we have unexpected heating on the steering wheel to keep the delicate hands of our target market comfortable on cold days and a beverage cooler in the glove box since a) the driver won't need gloves and b) the passengers will probably want to be drunk.
03/17/09
03/17/09
Hey, in Korea, if a pedestrian gets hit by a car, it's the pedestrian's fault. At least that hood ornament makes sure those damned pedestrians won't make that mistake again.
03/17/09
Well, I suppose they can just help. Rarely has anybody been killed by a hood ornament that wasn't attached to a moving car.
...or perhaps the hand of an angry spouse who's just so sick of you spending your time out here in the garage workin on this @&%*#$! $&%#ING! CAR!
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
Same with performance and the Genesis coupe.
03/17/09
The overall quality did however beat most production cars I've seen.
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
My Hyundai was a piece of turd, don't get me wrong, but they're doing MUCH better now....
ps: it's St Patrick's Day. Chill.
03/17/09
Signed,
Shane Joseph's dad
Hooray Xenophobia!
03/17/09
03/17/09
[www.hyundai-forums.com]
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
03/17/09
02/17/09
Just like that Amanti, but still over priced.
02/17/09
02/17/09
02/17/09
I think that may be an early COTD nominee.
02/17/09
.....hahahahahahahahahahaha,is it 1st April already?
02/17/09
Oh...wait...
That Equus is a really nice car. I just can't imagen spending nearly a $100k on a Hyundai
02/17/09
That may change as time goes by. If memory serves, once upon a time, you could get a brand new BMW cheaper than you could get a used Buick, and BMW had its sight set on becoming the German equivalent of what Buick was at that time.
Now look how things have changed.
Give it ten years or so, and Hyundai may well be as respected a luxury brand as Mercedes-Benz, BMW, etc.
02/17/09
This was my exact first thought when I saw this. It is the exact same concept and we alllllll remember how well the Pheaton did, don't we?
02/17/09
VW, in much of the world, has the brand cachet to pull off a $100k car. Just not THAT $100k car; it has to be something sexy, exciting and desirable. The Phaeton was none of these things.