1988 - Jalopnik

posts about #1988 more →
Listen To Your Heartbeat In A 1988 Celebrity Eurosport
Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
Junkyard Jackpot: BMW 2002, Corolla GT-S, Triumph Spitfire
Hey Y'all, Watch This! Adventures In Arboreal Locomotion, Toyota Style
Project Car Hell, Teutonic Nemesis Edition: BMW 750iL or Porsche 928?
Groovalicious Purple Princess Of Peace Art Car Falls On Hard Times, Faces Crusher
The Most Reliable Motor Vehicle I Know Of: 1988 Toyota Pickup
Mister Oldskool's Purple Cadillac Proves Unsuccesful As Inconspicuous Getaway Vehicle
1988 Geo Metro: No Matter What!
Mickey Rourke Is Impressed By The '88 Daihatsu Charade's New 1300cc Engine

Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.

Dsmvwl Admin Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×

quayzar
11/16/09

In reply to Listen To Your Heartbeat In A 1988 Celebrity Eurosport
Only America could make a car that had Euro in the name that was never sold in Europe. #eurosport
Reply

quayzar was starred quayzar was unstarred

Novaload
11/15/09

In reply to Listen To Your Heartbeat In A 1988 Celebrity Eurosport
Uh, yeah. Of course. The exotic chick has never seen an automobile before, so she's startled when this dull, square, uninspired beast lumbers through her tropical paradise.
Yeah, that must be it.

Either that, or the driver is her Dad looking for her because she's SO in trouble for skipping school again. #eurosport
Reply

Novaload was starred Novaload was unstarred

Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet
11/15/09

In reply to Listen To Your Heartbeat In A 1988 Celebrity Eurosport
The babe can haul on my lanyard anytime she wants. The Eurosport was way too little, way too late. I don't think I'll be returning that call. #eurosport
Reply

Comrade Teargaskov
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
If you can get parts without sending money to Russia, than it's a legit question. I am going with the Opel. #fordfestiva
Reply

Comrade Teargaskov was starred

brandegee
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
The awful TR7 hardtop (why?) should earn the IOE if it does the distance. The Festiva is pretty awful, but benefits from a Japanese engine. If only they could have dug deeper for the European-sourced 70s Fiesta. #fordfestiva
Reply

brandegee was starred brandegee was unstarred

Alfisted
10/25/09

@brandegee: When was the last time you saw a Wundercar? #fordfestiva
Reply

Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred

brandegee
10/27/09

@Alfisted: I saw one last weekend in my city of residence. Under it's own power! I also saw a Datsun B210 hatchback, also running. For this type of town, these are major sightings. #fordfestiva
Reply

brandegee was starred brandegee was unstarred

Spinnetti
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
Giving it to the festiva is hardly sporting. It's Korean ain't it? I would think the TR7 would win by default unless there is something more horrible? #fordfestiva
Reply

Maymar promoted this comment Spinnetti was starred Spinnetti was unstarred

Maymar
10/25/09

@Spinnetti: Not just Korean, but 1980s Korean. This is from the same time that Hyundai was selling the woefully misnamed Stellar and Excel (they weren't and didn't, respectively). It may have been good, but but I suspect that was a fluke.

I'll concede though, that little can win against a TR7. #fordfestiva
Reply

Maymar was starred Maymar was unstarred

CptSevere
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
The Festiva beercan is actually ahead of the British sports car? Give it to them. But like UD Man said, if that MGB is still running, they need to be kept in consideration for this prestigious award. #fordfestiva
Reply

Novaload promoted this comment CptSevere was starred CptSevere was unstarred

Speedycop
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
Nothing against the Festiva guys, but that car is a little too new and mundane for IOE, given the unreliable nature and age of its competition. Old school or rare/unreliable FTW! #fordfestiva
Reply

Novaload promoted this comment Speedycop was starred Speedycop was unstarred

smalleyxb122
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
Back in high school, I logged more miles than I care to admit behind the wheel of my sister's 1989 Festiva, because my car at the time was a Triumph Spitfire, and seldom ran.

The Festiva wasn't fast, but felt surprisingly peppy with a 4-speed, and the handling was quick, though coupled with excessive body roll.

Without knowing the lap totals, I'd lean toward the Triumph for IOE, since it is a worse vehicle by a sizable margin, but if the Festiva's lap count can outpace its marginal superiority, I'd say "give it to 'em." #fordfestiva
Reply

smalleyxb122 was starred smalleyxb122 was unstarred

Ralph Wiley Is Poised
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
Ride those twelve-inch wheels to VICTORY! #fordfestiva
Reply

Novaload promoted this comment

Robergug
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?

I'd like to know what an IOE is. But since I'm not approved, no one will ever see my question and I won't ever get an answer. This place is a cesspit. #fordfestiva
Reply

Maymar promoted this comment Robergug was starred Robergug was unstarred

Maymar
10/25/09

@Robergug: Index of Effluency - more or less the car that did better than it had any right to (over other cars doing the same). #fordfestiva
Reply

Maymar was starred Maymar was unstarred

f86sabre
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
When shopping for LeMons cars we thought about a Festiva, but the Escort looked like the better platform. Festiva's are basically the Rodney Dangerfields of the Ford family. They are always there, mostly get the job done, but no respect. I'd give them a shot at IOE.
Reply

Van Sarockin, rogue trebuchet promoted this comment Edited by f86sabre at 10/25/09 3:47 PM f86sabre was starred f86sabre was unstarred

Racin_G73 - dirt track legend (some day ... maybe)
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
It is getting the MOST from the least, so ... I'd have to say that if the Festiva can double the lap count of the TR7, then they deserve the award. #fordfestiva
Reply

Novaload promoted this comment

UDMan
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
Hey Murilee, you guys gave the IOE to an Oldsmobile 98, and a FWD Pontiac Grand Prix, so while the Festiva isn't really all that cool, it deserves a chance at the award.

But there has to be more improbable machinery out there that might finish. The TR7 might be a contender, but I seem to have remembered that there is a Fiat 124 spyder rolling about, and an MGB. And maybe it's time to award an IOE to a Pickup Truck..... #fordfestiva
Reply

UDMan was starred UDMan was unstarred

Alfisted
10/25/09

In reply to Should A Ford Festiva Be Considered Terrible Enough To Win Index Of Effluency?
The Festiva is not unreliable, heavy, poor handling and/or old enough to claim the award. If only it were a Geo. #fordfestiva
Reply

Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred

Paul Y. don't drive too fast.
10/25/09

@Alfisted: No, it's a Mazda. For what it's worth, the Triumph is likely more deserving. The Festiva, while a depressing little crapcan, isn't THAT bad. #fordfestiva
Reply

MushyHeirloom
10/25/09

@Paul Y. don't drive too fast.: Ohhh, no. Badged as a Mazda in some markets, and based on a Mazda platform and engine, but that shitbox was built by Kia. Think of it as a more-efficient, less-refined Assfire, er, Aspire.

I'd still go for the Triumph, but it'll come down to whether either machine manages to break down.
Reply

Edited by MushyHeirloom at 10/25/09 2:53 PM MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred

Alfisted
10/25/09

@MushyHeirloom: Ironically, I would have no issue with an Asspire winning IOE. I guess I'm superficial - the Aspire's shape just screams Korean POS to me in a way that the Festiva never did. #fordfestiva
Reply

Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred

MushyHeirloom
10/25/09

@Alfisted: Festivas still look like cheap-and-cheerful econoboxes when they're a bit dinged up, but an Assfire looked like shit right off the dealer lot, and each inevitable trim failure made things worse. #fordfestiva
Reply

MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred

friendlynerd
10/26/09

@MushyHeirloom: built by Kia, yes, but with Mazda design and components. #fordfestiva
Reply

MushyHeirloom promoted this comment friendlynerd was starred friendlynerd was unstarred

MushyHeirloom
10/27/09

@friendlynerd: The Lada Riva was based on a Fiat 124...

...wait, bad example.

The Iran Khodro Paykan was a Hillman Hunter...

...damn it.

Okay, fine. Pontiac/Daewoo LeMans: huge piece of shit, even compared to this Festiva. Based on the perfectly okay Opel Kadett E. #fordfestiva
Reply

MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred

Earlier discussions Other discussions Show all discussions Show featured discussions only Start a new discussion

SUBSCRIBE TO Jalopnik

Login

Reset Password

Register

Submit Your Comment