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Project Car Hell

PCH, Invasion Of The Hell Projects Edition: Three Alfas or Four Citroens?

Welcome to Project Car Hell, where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, we had the chance to choose between two potential moonshine runners, with either of which one might keep bread on the table during the coming Financiapocalypse, and the Mercury Maruader beat the BMW 850i like Junior Johnson beat the North Carolina Highway Patrol's '53 Ford Mainlines back in the day. However, some of you- I'm not going to use the word "whiners," though it did occur to me- complained that those two cars didn't rate high enough readings on the Hell-O-Meter™. In other words, Hell isn't hot enough for you! We aim to please here, so let's flood the garage with chlorine triflouride, park some more challenging projects inside, and slam the door on you… for eternity!
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5:20 PM on Fri Oct 10 2008
By Murilee Martin
884 views, 34 comments

Latest by Charles_Barrett - Now with Variable-Valve Timing: "...chlorine triflouride..." Holy cow, Murilee, talk about bringing out the chemical big guns... that stuff makes the Alien embryo acid blood more »

Alternative Fuel

Fuel Up Only With Free Stuff You Find Along The Route: Berkeley To Vegas, No Petroleum!

The City of Berkeley is now a maximum security statist dystopia… Cars are illegal… Petroleum is a controlled substance… Now, geeks and gearheads unite to escape from Berkeley by any non-petroleum means necessary! That's right, a 600-mile race in vehicles not only prohibited from burning petroleum-based fuel but prohibited from buying any fuel whatsoever along the way- it's all got to be obtained free along the route. Steam-powered cars burning wood chips left behind by tree-cutting crews! Gasifiers converting dead possums and heaps of fast-food wrappers into go-go-gas! Batteries charged by sweet-talking locals into allowing power-outlet access! Mules eating grass! Whatever it takes! The race starts tomorrow morning and I'll be making the jaunt from nearby Alameda to check it out- come back tomorrow and you'll see some of these dystopia-fleeing machines. More »

4:20 PM on Fri Oct 10 2008
By Murilee Martin
716 views, 26 comments

Latest by FrankGrimes: I would make a sweet car that runs on all the emissions from tofu dog farts. I would be in more »

Movies

Isn't This Fun, Old Man?

The 1980 film Used Cars may be the finest Malaise Era car movie ever made, and that includes anything featuring a '78 Trans Am. We've already shared the Marshal Lucky and Test Drive For Toby scenes, and now it's time to watch a beautiful '57 Chevy two-door- priced at just $2,400 on the New Deal Used Cars lot- get completely destroyed. More »

3:00 PM on Fri Oct 10 2008
By Murilee Martin
613 views, 16 comments

Latest by Naturally Exasperated?: I love that movie! Absolutely everyone, except Fuchs's daughter, was crooked. It made for one helluva believable storyline, as I more »

classic ad watch

The Tricky Dicky Buy Of The Week: Studebaker Family Wagon!

Say it's 1982. Would you buy a '61 Studebaker Lark wagon with "family rust" and "factory air in the tires" from this man? By comparison, Dominion Motors in Winnipeg could give you a better buy on that car, and all with 6.25% interest! Actually, we'd really love to have that very wagon right now, but it's probably just a reddish stain in a Canadian field at this point.

11:00 AM on Fri Oct 10 2008
By Murilee Martin
600 views, 10 comments

Latest by DrLemming: Eh. In size and price the Larks competed more directly against the senior Ramblers, which by 1963 were considered more »

Down On The Street

1972 Volkswagen Super Beetle

Welcome to Down On The Street, where we admire old vehicles found parked on the streets of the Island That Rust Forgot: Alameda, California. One thing I've tried to do is keep Volkswagen Old Beetles from overwhelming the series; that's because there we've got more air-cooled Beetles than any other type of old car on the island- more, even, than Chrysler A bodies. This doesn't mean, however, that I should avoid them completely- I just need to space them carefully… and our last one was all the way back in June. So here we go- our first DOTS Super Beetle!
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9:00 AM on Fri Oct 10 2008
By Murilee Martin
1,269 views, 62 comments

Latest by FuzzyPlushroom: If I knew then what I know now, it's Gremlin vs. Beetle. Neither one's really something you want in your more »

Nice Price Or Crack Pipe

Nice Price Or Crack Pipe: Twin-Engine, Twin-Shifter Subueetle For 20 Grand?

We're back for more harsh price judgment on possible cases of car-seller wishful thinking. Is a seller's asking price grounded in reality or indicative of overindulgence in those mean ol' Hubba Rocks? Yesterday, 61% of you thought that $97,000 was just way too much louie for this '57 Chevy 210. Was that because the '57 Chevy is just too common? How about something unique and handcrafted, guaranteed to make pedestrians walk into trees as you drive by? Say, the unholy union of a 1973 VW Beetle and a 1985 Subaru GL, with both engines still intact and functional and priced at $20,000? Working two gearshifts might be tricky, especially if the car also has two clutch pedals, but it goes without saying that this car must be driven using both engines simultaneously. Thanks to DodgePolara500 for the tip!

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8:00 AM on Fri Oct 10 2008
By Murilee Martin
2,850 views, 87 comments

Latest by Grrrrrrrrr: It's like a mermaid, except with the fish part on top and the lady part on the bottom. more »

moment of zen

AMC Pacer: For Those Who Prefer Round And Wide

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Project Car Hell

PCH, Financiapocalypse Moonshine Runner Edition: Mercury Marauder or BMW 850i?

Welcome to Project Car Hell, where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! With the Dow taking it in the shorts today, we're all thinking about how we'll keep afloat during the hard times that seem to be looming, if not already here. Naturally, federal, state, and local governments are thinking the same thing, and that means they're going to jack up the taxes on booze! Which, as students of Southern United States history know, that means opportunity for enterprising gearheads willing to assist the makers of fine lead-and-glycol-enhanced alcoholic beverages in getting their products to thirsty, unemployment-maddened consumers who won't have the wheelbarrows full of hyperinflated cash necessary to pay the revenoors' bite. Yes, you'll need to convert a big, fast car into a white-liquor-haulin' moonshine runner!
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5:20 PM on Thu Oct 9 2008
By Murilee Martin
4,961 views, 70 comments

Latest by hapless: I think you're all missing the most important selling point on the Merc: You could fit the 850i in its more »

Russia

Old Detroit Iron Languishes In Russian Gulag

When you try to import an old American car into Russia, you'd better meet the deadline for paying the import tax… or there'll be a knock on your door in the dead of night and the car will end up in this Moscow impound yard. What could be worse, you ask? For some good examples, we suggest Russian literature, such as f'rexample Solzhenitsyn's Cancer Ward, the protagonist of which suffers from cancer and a broken heart… in the gulag. Thanks to K5ING and SOS10 for the tip!


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4:00 PM on Thu Oct 9 2008
By Murilee Martin
1,736 views, 21 comments

Latest by econobiker: Got to love that they impound these cars yet were shipping out stolen caprices, crown vics, and SUV's like crazy more »

Tech

DIN Rail And Smurf Tube: How To Wire Your Race Car On The Cheap

As the Bent Belvedere inches ever closer to 24 Hours Of LeMons Thunderhill readiness, team captain Plymsole has decided that the duct-tape-and-speaker-wire electrical system isn't going to be very reliable on the track. Time to tear out all the scary old stuff and start over fresh! Now, they could have followed my example and spent about 88,000 hours scratchbuilding a space shuttle wiring harness, but there's no need for that madness when you've got Jack Astro (of Project Car Hell Theme Song fame) on the team!
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3:00 PM on Thu Oct 9 2008
By Murilee Martin
1,720 views, 39 comments

Latest by tallzag: Our 67 Fury has a very similar wiring set-up and we went super simple on it, barely have anything for more »

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