Jalopnik: Hummer

Hilarious Hungarian Ice Hummers On Hoth

Peter Orosz — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 14:30:00 EST

Last week’s ridiculous Hummer accident in Hungary has, predictably, become the pictorial meme in these still-frozen parts. Apart from a well-executed and faithful tribute in Lego, this obligatory Star Wars AT-AT version may be our favorite. More »

What Made You Think The Second Hummer Wouldn't Also Fall Through The Ice?

Peter Orosz — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 14:30:00 EST

Eastern Europe has been under a Siberian spell for a week or so, prompting the owner of a Hummer H2 to test the six inches of ice on Hungary’s Lake Balaton for some Siberian-style winter driving. What he apparently forgot was that a few days of 10-degree weather does not magically turn Lake Balaton into Lake Baikal. More »

All The Best 2012 Dakar Rally Photos In One Place

Wes Siler — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 16:00:00 EST

Would you believe that a MINI won the Dakar rally this year? Perhaps a car brand that's as far from its roots in purposeful simplicity is a fitting metaphor for a rally named after a place in Africa that, for the first time this year, entered Peru. More »

Robby Gordon To Inspectors: "Kiss My Ass"

Matt Hardigree — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 15:06:32 EST

The drama over Robby Gordon and Le Inspectors at Dakar heated up yesterday after the ex-NASCAR driver attempted to get a TV crew to inspect his Hummer in order to prove he didn't cheat. He also made a request regarding their lips and his butt cheeks. More »

Are The French Discriminating Against NASCAR Driver Robby Gordon?

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 14:00:00 EST

American Ex-NASCAR driver Robby Gordon was killing it in the opening days of the grueling Dakar 2012 race in South America until a run-in with French favorite Stephane Peterhansel. Then the French-based governing body disqualified Gordon while letting Peterhansel get a pass despite nearly running over a motorcyclist. More »

China's armored Hummer clone gets a turret

Patrick Frawley — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 12:30:00 EST

Now that Christmas is over, the Chinese can get back to making things you won't find at Wal-Mart — like an armored attack vehicle with a turret based on a reverse-engineered Army HMMWV (Hummer H1 to us civvies). More »

Men save woman from this burning car, then sue her

Justin Hyde — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 12:00:00 EDT

Three years ago, a pair of Ohio men saw a Hummer H3 burning at the bottom of an embankment after running off a road. Rushing to the truck, they pulled a woman from the flames. Now they're suing her for damages from the injuries they suffered saving her life. More »

YouTube star missing after being sucked out of sunroof by tornado

Justin Hyde — Wed, 25 May 2011 16:45:00 EDT

Will Norton is a Missouri high-school senior who built an Internet following with his self-made comedy videos. Sunday was his graduation in Joplin — cut short by a tornado that ripped him from a Hummer H3. He's still missing. More »

What a duckling-killing psycho teen tells us about local news

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 14:00:00 EDT

A 19-year-old man in Ann Arbor, Michigan killed four ducklings by running over them with his Hummer, apparently as an act of vengeance against the employees of a McDonalds who act as caretakers of the duck family. More »

Robby Gordon Needed A Bearing For Dakar, Got The Shaft Instead

Justin Hyde — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 10:00:00 EST

Robby Gordon's adventures in this year's Dakar Rally officially crossed the line from bad to cursed this week. Exhibit A: Gordon was disqualified because a part he needed was in a teammate's truck — which didn't stop to help him. More »

Robby Gordon Trades Dakar-Ready Hummer For Fiat 147

Justin Hyde — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 16:30:00 EST

NASCAR driver Robby Gordon built his own custom Hummer for the backbreaking Dakar rally. Yet when it got stuck on a boulder during the second day, Gordon turned to an unlikely tow vehicle — a local Fiat 147. UPDATED More »

Zero South:The Biodiesel Electric-Tracked Hummer

Justin Hyde — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 16:00:00 EDT

Meet the Zero South PHE-PTV, a biodiesel-powered, series-electric Hummer with tracks designed for a South Pole expedition set for next year, which will apparently be filmed by the director of the Who Killed/Revived The Electric Car movies. More »

Don't Mess With The Beach Master Unit

Matt Hardigree — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 09:00:00 EDT

The Navy is good at naming things. Example: the Beach Master Unit 1. Here's BMU1 supporting a humanitarian and civic assistance mission in Colombia. Photo Credit: Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Jonathen E. Davis/U.S. Navy. More »

Take Your Fuel Economy And Stuff It

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 15:00:00 EDT

These days it takes a certain egotistical fortitude to drive a Hummer H2 and revel in the conspicuous consumption. Other people? Well, they're ridiculed. Take that LOL OIL Tesla. Oh Packer backers, you so crazy. More »

Don't Look Now, But There's An Angry Truck In Your Airliner

Sam Smith — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 09:00:00 EDT

An Oshkosh M-ATV — the Army's half-million-dollar, 370-hp, sixteen-ton tactical truck — in the belly of a 747. There is one word for this photo, and that word is "grr." Photo Credit: Zach Rosenberg. [Automobile] More »

Armored Hummer H2: For The Asshole Who Gets Shot At

Matt Hardigree — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 13:30:00 EDT

When we called the Hummer H2 a car for "Ed Hardy-wearing assholes," our friends at Texas Armoring noticed and built a special Jalopnik rotating license plate for their up-armored Hummer H2. Here it is in action. More »

China's Hummer Ripoff Doesn't Ask, Doesn't Tell

Ben Wojdyla — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 15:00:00 EDT

Now that Hummer is dead, Chinese automaker Dongfeng's ripoff version needs to amp up the masculine sales pitch. The male model doing his thing works, but the whitewall tires and sunny paint job just end up sending a mixed message. More »

Geigercars' Timing On The Hummer H2 Bomber Couldn't Be Worse

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 07 Apr 2010 13:00:00 EDT

GM's announced there's no buyer for Hummer and they'll be winding the brand down. Perfect timing for Geigercars to announce their Mattracks-equipped Hummer H2 Bomber. Beside the tracks, the best feature is the WWII-bomber-style pinup painted on the side. More »

2020 Mini Cooper S Spied At New York Auto Show

Wes Siler — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 08:30:00 EDT

At the rate things are going with model bloat, we wouldn't be surprised if this was actually a prototype for an upcoming Mini. It's not. It's actually the Mini media shuttle. Obese car journalists don't fit in Mini backseats. More »

The Inside Story of the Horse-Drawn Hummer

Wes Siler — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 12:00:00 EDT

Artist Jeremy Dean created the ultimate vehicle for wealthy, privileged Americans in a post-financiapocalyptic, post-oil war imaginary and heavily satirical future: the Horse-Drawn Hummer. Here is its story. More »

This Is Why Hummer Is Dying

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 16:30:00 EST

The fundamental problem with the slowly dying Hummer wasn't the product. The brand was long ago usurped by knuckleheads and used as a symbol of conspicuous consumption and this tuner abomination is part of the problem. Unleash the hounds! More »

Hummer H3 + Tracks + Snow-Covered Nurburgring = Heroic Win

Ben Wojdyla — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 17:45:00 EST

This is what we call "winning at life." While mortals lust after the opportunity to drive the Nurburgring, Wolfgang Blaube took a Mattrack-equipped Hummer H3 on the ~~Green~~ White Hell for Autobild. Ring time? Immortally badass, that's his ringtime. [AutoBild] More »

Off-Road Trails And Games Of Grab-Ass: A Look At Hummer's Bright Side

Ben Wojdyla — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 14:30:00 EST

Hummer is mostly dead, but last summer, we took two H3s and joined the Hummer Club on an expedition to Michigan's Drummond Island. One local woman grabbed my ass, but for the most part, the fun happened behind the wheel. More »

Hummer Not Dead Yet, GM Considering Other Offers

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 13:00:00 EST

Hold the phones! Two previous suitors for Hummer have stepped up in the wake of China's failure to secure a deal and, of course, us running our fucking Hummer eulogy. Talk about back-room Saab-like B.S. [WSJ.com] More »

Hummer, A Eulogy: America Says Goodbye To Itself

Sam Smith — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 12:00:00 EST

Hummer is the quintessential American brand — an allegory of everything right and wrong with our great nation. Now, after a failed sale to the Chinese, the brand is dead. So what does this say about America? More »

GM Kills Hummer, Officially

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 15:10:00 EST

GM will officially wind down Hummer operations as a deal with a Chinese automaker stalled over Chinese environmental concerns You gotta love Hummer — a brand so quintessentially American, so brazenly gas-guzzling, that even the Chinese find it offensive. More »

Hummer Deal Halted By Chinese Government

Matt Hardigree — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 11:15:00 EST

Chinese government halts Hummer deal. Turns out, Hummers aren't fuel-efficient. Huh. Who knew? [FT] More »

The H3 Recon Makes Other Hummers Look Lame

Ben Wojdyla — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 13:30:00 EST

A forum member at HummerXClub.com wasn't satisfied with the front independent suspension on his H3 Alpha, so he ripped it out and went solid axle, he also chopped the truck up and made it a slant back. Totally cool. More »

Pentagon To Stop Buying Humvees, But The Replacements Are Awesome

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 10:30:00 EST

Cue up Boyz II Men's "End Of The Road" because the Pentagon announced they're going to stop buying Humvees after this year. A quick look at two of the vehicles set to replace the venerable truck below. More »

Hummer Lines Go Silent Until Chinese Sale Complete

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 16:00:00 EST

After the the brand has existed for months in sale-or-no-sale purgatory and seeing product demand fall to a quarter of capacity, GM's decided to halt production of all Hummer products until sale to its Chinese suitors is complete. More »

VIDEO: Snowball Hits Hummer, Off-Duty DC Cop Pulls Sidearm

Ben Wojdyla — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 08:30:00 EST

Washington DC plainclothes officer Detective Bayler lost his cool when a snowball from a pre-organized neighborhood snowball fight hit his Hummer H2. He got out, drew his side arm and threatened the snowballers. On video. NSFW language ahead. More »

Jalopnik's Worst10 Cars Of The Decade

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 12:00:00 EST

Jalopnik's Worst10 Cars Of The Decade" alt="Click here to read Jalopnik's Worst10 Cars Of The Decade" src="http://cache.jalopnik.com/assets/images/12/2012/01/small_b95ea916656479bc43e43c0fb3ab7679.jpg"/>

As we approach the end of the decade, it's time to look back. To start, say hello to Bad: Unless you hate yourself, hate your money, or simply enjoy life too much, here's ten cars you shouldn't be driving. More »

Qatar Junkyard A Treasure Trove Of Automotive Oddities

Ben Wojdyla — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 09:00:00 EST

Out hunting for parts for his '77 Daihatsu F20, reader Rashid stumbled across some very interesting automobiles in his local scrapyard in Doha, Qatar. Pretty much the last place on Earth you'd expect to find a lifted Cadillac. Gallery below. More »

Why Do Republicans Hate American Automakers?

Matt Hardigree — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:30:00 EST

A German company is battling with a Japanese one to become the world's biggest automaker. Italians own Chrysler. It's like World War II except we're losing. So why are Republicans suddenly on the side of the automotive Axis powers? More »

Hummer Plans H4, H5 Amid Uncertain Future

Ben Wojdyla — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 13:00:00 EST

Hummer is being sold to China's Sichuan Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery with production of current generation vehicles to be carried out under contract by GM. Moving forward, Hummer's new Chinese leaders plans to get smaller with an H4 and H5. More »

Hoon Of The Day: Modified Hummer Drives Underwater

Ray Wert — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 08:00:00 EST

There's really nothing more to say here. Just watch it. Trust us, it's worth it. (Hat tip to Kimi!) [via Ziezo] More »

Eight Most Sexually Suggestive Car Names

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 15:30:00 EDT

When automakers choose car names they often try to evoke strength, performance and desirability — sometimes that last one goes a bit too far. Below, our list of the eight most sexually suggestive car names. More »

The Five Best Custom Green Cars

Ben Wojdyla — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 13:00:00 EDT

The greenies over at design blog Inhabitat have picked out their their favorite "pimped-out" eco rides. Among them a VW Bug, Chevy S-10, a '65 Impala supersport and a stretched Hummer H1 limo. How unexpected. More »