I'll admit, there's some thing about a really big fiasco that I find appealing. Not a disaster, but more of something along the lines of a good, rich clusterfuck. That's what this drunk dump truck driver accomplished when he slammed his raised dumper right into the Burlington Skyway in Canada.
— Nate Vandermeer (@vandernate) July 31, 2014
One thing you'll note about the Burlington Skyway is that it's called a "Skyway" which is sort of a synonym for "Not-In-The-Way-Of-Most-Trucks-Way." But you have to hand it to Sukhvinder Singh Rai, the 34 year old impaired driver who managed to find a way.
Not shockingly, he's facing two counts of impaired driving, and I suspect will be seeking new employment soon. He'd be a good hire — what are the chances of him doing this again?
The way chosen was by driving his dump truck with the big boxcar-sized rear raised to a dumping angle, making the front end of the box high enough in the air to slam hard into the complex trellis structure of the skyway, casuing a genuinely impressive level of chaos.
ALL TORONTO BOUND LANES CLOSED ON QEW AT BURLINGTON SKYWAY pic.twitter.com/YV6yvWlvEO— name can't be blank (@satansux) July 31, 2014
The Skyway was undergoing maintenance, and as such had scaffolding over it and construction workers on it, making it even more impressive that no one was hurt. Other drivers tried to warn the driver by honking and, I imagine, screaming inside their cars, but the dump truck driver was determined to ruin as many days as possible.
CBC's article quotes a witness:
"The construction workers up there, they all started coming down the steps of the scaffolding really fast. I've never seen anyone move that fast on scaffolding before. It was just crazy. They jumped from the scaffolding onto the steel structure of the bridge."
Yikes. Now shipping's closed, Toronto-bound lanes of the road are closed, and engineers are still looking over the mess to see how bad it is.
I think the lesson here is that it's impressive how much one determined, drunk man driving a huge dump truck can really do. That should be on an inspirational poster.