Photo: Tony Dejak/AP

Today, we wrote a story about how, even with driverless cars, Uber’s future isn’t looking so hot. But maybe there’s one person can save the ailing company: Superman!

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Actually, even he couldn’t manage, as needsblinkerluid points out:

Still, there’s nothing wrong with imagining what it’d be like if a fictional, cape-wearing superhero were at the helm of your Uber. Let Turbolence88 Loves Spinning Doritos walk you through a typical Superman-Uber Yelp review page:

As payment for your fine comment (especially for your Travis reference), Turbolence88 Loves Spinning Doritos, here’s another thing that couldn’t be saved by Superman—this song: