Think of it as a smaller, more efficient Hummer capable of traveling long distances without waking up the economy thanks to the AWD Q-Force system. Specs are impressive: achieves a sustained 80 MPH, climbs 60-degree grades, and fuel consumption 25% above similar vehicles. There's even a special weapons ring designed to help the gunner throw down serious fire across rough terrain.

The CREV is undergoing testing at Michigan's TARDEC to see if the military is ready to go olive Green.

[CNET]

"A Hybrid?" I hear you say, "That can't be badass." Well, the military is less concerned about scoring some sweet eco-chick tail and more worried about the amount of gas it uses in remote operating theaters. Not because it can't afford to pay for fill-ups, but because refueling in a war zone can be a tactical nightmare. Thanks to the diesel/electric hybrid, the JAMMA makes 398lb/ft of torque at just 1,800 RPM and can travel up to 450 miles on the ground to teach terrorists a lesson thanks to a combined fuel economy of 21 MPG. The odd proportions aren't just designed to squeeze into an Osprey, but also to allow a 360-degree field of fire for the bed-mounted machine guns.

A visionary project dating back to 2005, the TAC-V Joint All-Terrain Modular Mobility Asset (JAMMA) family of vehicles has been developed to be a genuine technology leap over existing military armored all-terrain vehicles in performance, modular functionality and overall capabilities.

The TAC-V JAMMA V-22 ITV variant, the foundation cornerstone of the JAMMA family of vehicles, has been built to satisfy the requirements of special operations user groups. Engineered with the multi-mission, multi-functional V-22 Osprey in mind, the JAMMA V-22 ITV variant is the only armor ready, four occupant, hybrid, high performance off road vehicle in existence that is capable of being internally transported inside that aircraft.

In addition to a multitude of vehicle configurations available in the 60" wide V-22 ITV variant, an 80" wide, extreme off-road performance suspension is available on the same core vehicle, which maximizes the internal cargo space of the H-53 and H-47 aircraft. This wider suspension variant - the JAMMA RECONDO variant - has greatly enhanced off-road performance and load carrying capabilities. The overall functionality, frontline deliverability and performance capabilities of these two variations of the same core JAMMA vehicle greatly surpass any existing vehicle in this size and class.

Some of the unique features of the JAMMA family of vehicles include an armor attachment system that allows threat specific armor to be easily and readily attached to or removed from the vehicle in virtually any environment; stadium seating that allows the driver to be comprehensively armored while also preventing the driver from blocking the fire arcs of the other vehicle occupants; and, optimized occupant roll-over protection with full fields of fire on the move.

In addition to all of its other beneficial attributes, the TAC-V JAMMA V-22 ITV variant is available with a diesel/JP8 engine, or, with a state of the art hybrid driveline that optimizes the vehicle's efficiency and generates 25kW continuous exportable power.

* Width: 60 in. (basic V-22 variant)
* Height: 60 in. (basic V-22 variant)
* Gross Vehicle Weight: 7,500
* Payload: 3,000
* Engine: 6 cyl. Turbo Diesel, Hybrid Electric Motor
* Horsepower: 214 (Diesel), 100 (Hybrid-Electric)
* Torque: 398 lb. ft. @ 1800 RPM
* Drivetrain: 4 wheel drive
* Exportable Power Capacity: 25kW
* Miles per gallon: 21 (targeted across all drive circles)
* Max Road Range (Miles): 450
* Sustainable Highway Speed at GVW: 90 mph
* Operational elevation before performance degradation: Up to 10,000 ft. ASL
* Operational Ambient Temperature range: -30 deg F to 135 deg F

[PCAuto via The Tycho]

Now, we admit that this engine was never intended for use in a car, but tanks are certainly related to cars and so we say this engine qualifies for the Engine Of The Day series. The deal with the A57 was that Chrysler needed to whomp up a tank engine in a hurry, so as to put the kibosh on the Thousand Year Reich and the Greater East Asia Co-Prosperity Sphere. The easiest way to do this was to grab as many existing components off the shelf as possible, so Chrysler used the 201-cubic-inch Plymouth flathead six as the basis for the new engine. Five crankshafts driving a common center shaft via individual ring gears arrayed around a central gear, five heads, five carburetors, five distributors… and 30 cylinders! It was heavy as hell, but it got the job done and was used to power M3A4 Lee and M4A4 Sherman tanks. Here's a video that gives you an idea of this engine's sound:


[Autospeed]

Demo video of Boeing's YAL-1 Airborne Laser mounted to a 747-400:
Boeing demonstrated the new Avenger Laser System at the White Sands Missile Range in New Mexico last month with impressive results. They were able to shoot down three small UAVs with the 1kW laser system and used the demonstration as a testbed for the U.S. Military. It was overseen by representatives of the U.S. Army's Cruise Missile Defense Systems project office. Small UAVs pose an increasing threat to U.S. troops in war zones based on their ability to carry ammunition and surveillance devices.

The primary reason for using lasers in the battlefield is the stealth factor that they provide. Whereas missiles leave a smoke plume that can easily be seen for miles, a laser defense system leaves no trace, therefore the ground troops location will remain undetected.

"Small UAVs armed with explosives or equipped with surveillance sensors are a growing threat on the battlefield," said Gary Fitzmire, vice president and program director of Boeing Directed Energy Systems. "Laser Avenger, unlike a conventional weapon, can fire its laser beam without creating missile exhaust or gun flashes that would reveal its position. As a result, Laser Avenger can neutralize these UAV threats while keeping our troops safe."

This was the stuff of movies, comics and video games for years, but it looks as if it's finally starting to become a reality and we're excited.

Boeing Press Release:

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M., Jan. 26, 2009 — The Boeing Company [NYSE: BA] has successfully demonstrated that a laser system mounted on an Avenger combat vehicle can shoot down a small unmanned aerial vehicle (UAV) like those that increasingly threaten U.S. troops deployed in war zones.

During tests last month at White Sands Missile Range, N.M., Laser Avenger achieved its principal test objectives by using its advanced targeting system to acquire and track three small UAVs flying against a complex background of mountains and desert. The laser system also shot down one of the UAVs from an operationally relevant range. These tests mark the first time a combat vehicle has used a laser to shoot down a UAV.

Representatives of the U.S. Army's Cruise Missile Defense Systems project office observed the tests.

"Small UAVs armed with explosives or equipped with surveillance sensors are a growing threat on the battlefield," said Gary Fitzmire, vice president and program director of Boeing Directed Energy Systems. "Laser Avenger, unlike a conventional weapon, can fire its laser beam without creating missile exhaust or gun flashes that would reveal its position. As a result, Laser Avenger can neutralize these UAV threats while keeping our troops safe."

The tests follow a 2007 demonstration in which an earlier version of Laser Avenger neutralized improvised explosive devices (IEDs) and unexploded ordnance (UXO) on the ground.

"We doubled the laser power; added sophisticated acquisition, tracking and pointing capability; and simplified and ruggedized the design," said Lee Gutheinz, Boeing program director for High-Energy Laser/Electro-Optical Systems. "Boeing developed and integrated these upgrades in less than a year, underscoring our ability to rapidly respond to warfighters' needs."

Laser Avenger integrates a directed energy weapon together with the kinetic weapons on the proven Avenger air defense system developed by Boeing Combat Systems in Huntsville, Ala. It is a Boeing-funded initiative to demonstrate that directed energy weapons are maturing and are relevant to today's battlefield.

Boeing leads the way in developing laser systems for a variety of U.S. Air Force and Army warfighter applications. These systems include the Airborne Laser, the Advanced Tactical Laser, the High Energy Laser Technology Demonstrator and the Tactical Relay Mirror System.

[via Boeing]

What if this had become the standard-issue military vehicle during the war? Would the entire SUV market as we know it today have ceased to exist? Or would all Hummers have been pyramid-shaped? Would we have parking lots that looked like pie charts? Okay, we need to go lay down for a while and think this over.

Images copyright: Mark Arnold / Jalopnik.com

It turns out that this truck is owned by the guy who runs the Alameda Naval Air Museum, and all the costumed folks hanging around (including a guy in full Indiana Jones gear and some fur-hatted Rooskies) were getting ready to attend the grand opening of the newly restored Alameda Theater, which had been closed for 30 years and was showing an Indiana Jones premiere. Sure, this International normally lives in a museum, but I caught it parked on the street- it's fair DOTS game!


Why Red Army soldiers plan to ride to the movies in a truck done up in USMC colors is a bit hard to figure out, but the costumes were quite good and this truck looks reasonably complete.


I'm hoping that military-vehicle expert (and my ex-coworker) Clinto can give us some more details on this old soldier; I'll need to head down to the ANAM later on and see what other vehicles they've got.

Some pics (maybe in a couple emails) of our Porsche 597 Jagdwagens. As you probably know, a grand total of 71 were made between 1955 and 1958. All were handbuilt in the race shop right next to the 550 Spyders (I've got picstures) as prototypes, so no two were exactly alike. They were originally developed as a proposal for a light utility, Jeep-type vehicle for the German Army when it was reorganized ten years after WW II. Unfortunately, the DKW Munga was chosen instead of the 597. Some people say it was politics but it was probably economics. The Munga was a very basic, throw-away vehicle with a simple three cylinder, two-stroke engine. The 597 was typical of all Porsches; technologically advanced for its time (five forward gears, amphibious, the ability to climb a 65 degree grade, shift-on-the-fly 4wd, etc.) and, as a result, much more expensive.

When they didn't get the German Army contract, Porsche tried to market the vehicle to NATO countries. Finally, as a last ditch effort, it was marketed to consumers as a personal hunting vehicle for sportsmen. Hence the name "Jagdwagen" which roughly translates to "hunting car". OK, so it wasn't one of their greatest marketing successes but the people who griped about Porsche building the Cayenne when it came out sure didn't know the corporate history very well.

The green project 597 you see is the oldest existing model and was the one used for promotional brochures and press testing. We have all of the original parts. The restored green 597 is representative of what the majority looked like when new. Notice the Spyder seats and the 24v dynamo. It is also a matching numbers vehicle. The Speed Yellow Jagdwagen has been modified for modern day street use (lowered, 911 seats and dash, roll bar and 110 hp 912 engine). We have run a 1500 mile rally in it and it really upsets the Porsche purists. It is one of the very last ones made and we have all of the original parts so that it can be restored to its original configuration.

Of course, if a couple of college students driving around with all manner of black boxes, electronics and wires can gain access to a high-security military installation, it begs the question, what's stopping Al Qaeda?

At the Pentagon's request, Google has removed the material.

"To see these tanks crossing country at speed was a thrill which seemed inexhaustible — many times it encouraged us, and we were very proud of our Crusaders; though we often had cause to curse them."

Where do you fall in?A Tank? An Amphibious Vehicle? An Armet Gurkha? We're partial to the DUKW ourselves. What's your all-time favorite military land vehicle?

It's got the sirens, blackout lights, and other goodies the well-equipped Pontiac-driving Army officer needed back in the day.


It's good to get another 40s vehicle in this series; this is the fourth (after the '45 Jeep, '47 Plymouth, and '49 International Harvester).


This Chief Pontiac hood ornament isn't quite as cool as the one on the 1950 Pontiac Chieftan, but it's still one of my favorites.


Check out the vintage radiotelephone in there- I sure hope it's functional. Dog Oboe Tare Sail!

INTERNATIONAL MaxxPrO™ MaxxPro,™ the International® Mine Protected Vehicle. Built to withstand ballistic arms fire, mineblasts, IEDs, and nuclear, biological, and chemical environments that threaten the safety of its crew. Armoring flexibility allows upgrades to achieve the correct level of protection the mission requires. And International's proven severe service platform means quality, durability and reliability are on the battlefield. The International MPV. Miles Ahead. In protection and progress.

MaxxPro and Maxxpro XL Basic Specifications
Length: 254"- 282"
Width: 99"
Height: 120"
Wheel Base: 153"- 176"
Ground Clearance (Center of Vehicle): 14"
Ground Clearance (Differential Clearance): 11"
Angle of Approach: 58°
Angle of Departure: 46°- 48°
Gradeability: 70% low range
Side Slope: 30%
Mass Tare (GVM): 27,850-29,850 lbs
Payload: 3,650-11,150 lbs
GVWR: 31,500-41,000 lbs
Seating: 2-man crew plus 4-10 passengers
Configuration: 4 x 4
Turning Circle: 58'-68'
protection levels
Ballistic Protection: Armor and glass protection to meet mission needs
Mine Protection: Specialized 'V'-shaped hull design protects against mine/IED blasts
Engine
Make: International® I6 Diesel
Type: Turbo inter-cooled, direct electronic injection, four stroke
Displacement: 8.7 L (530 ci)
Emission Standard: EPA 2005
Maximum Power: 330 hp @ 2,100 rpm
Power/Mass Ratio: 18.9 - 20 hp/US ton
Maximum Torque: 1,150 ft-lbs @ 2,100 rpm
Batteries: 4 x 12-volt Batteries
Alternator: 400 amps
Other Features:
• Blackout lights
• Diamond Logic® Electrical System
Transmission
Make: Allison 3000
Type: 5-Speed Automatic
Trans fer Case
Make: 4 x 4 Two-Speed
Steering System
Steering Type: Hydraulically assisted recirculating ball axles
Front Axle: 16,000 lbs - 20,000 lbs Drive/Steer
Rear Axle: 21,000 lbs - 23,000 lbs Drive
Suspension
Springs: Semi-elliptical leaf springs
Shock Absorbers: Double acting telescopic hydraulic
Service Brakes: Full air brakes with ABS and traction control
Parking Brakes: Air-activated, hand-operated, rear axle brakes
Fording Depth: 36" without preparation
Wheels and tires
Rims: 10" x 20"
Tires: 395/85R20
Run Flats: optional

We'll take three for Jalopnikonia please, just send the bill c/o Ray Wert, Royal Oak, MI 48067. [Tomcar USA]

So the rotting, corrupt edifice that was 21st-century civilization has finally collapsed, and you and your bedraggled followers- I mean, "soldiers"- are holed up in a mud-walled compound stocked with freeze-dried rations and ammo. As warlord, you'll need a vehicle that impresses your subjects, yet is practical for a roadless environment. How about this Faun-Kraka, the ad for which may be the winner of the Jalopnik Least Informative Car Listing Evah Award? You get no price, no details on condition, no nothing other than a photograph of what appears to be part of the vehicle's nose and front suspension. We're going to assume that it doesn't run and needs a bunch of damn-near-impossible-to-find parts, and that the seller will be a very difficult negotiator. But still, don't you want a go-anywhere vehicle that folds up for parachute dropping? Here's a machine-translated rendering of a German Kraka website that will almost fill you in; Faun-Kraka experts, feel free to 'splain more to us about this fine machine.

But hey, maybe you feel that a post-apoc strongman should be surrounded by fierce German Shepherds, not fierce German vehicles. For you, we have this Studebaker Weasel, which drops a bunch of weight on both sides of the cool/hellish scale by having tracks! Yes sir, your soldiers will snap to attention when they hear the unmistakable sound of your tracked vehicle approaching through the woods. Technically, this Stude was known as the M29 back in World War Two, but if it's built by Studebaker we think you should proclaim it with pride, dammit! This one needs quite a bit of work (the seller says it's "nothing complicated that can not be done with a little knowledge or beer"), but it comes with some spare NOS treads. The original Studebaker engine has been replaced with a Ford six (boo!) and an automatic transmission (BOOOO!) but once you've got this thing in a billion pieces on your garage floor you'll be in the mood dropping in a blown Avanti 289 and 4-speed; hey, if you're in Hell already you won't even notice a 10° temperature increase.

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Yes, it's a freakin' Unimog parked in front of a charming Craftsman bungalow. And, yes, it really does live on the street in Alameda- I don't fake this stuff!


I won't attempt to speculate on the year and model, although a friend who knows military vehicles says it might be a U1300.


This is the first Unimog I've ever seen in person. It's actually not quite as huge as I'd been led to expect, but the ground clearance is absurd and the frame looks like it could survive a direct hit from a tactical nuclear device.


I think Mercedes should apply this interior look to all those damn luxo-SUVs they're selling. You don't need cupholders- you need switches you can operate while driving down a burning mountainside.


I'm sure my state's governor is very proud of his personal Unimog. Look at this thing!


That Florida Coast Guard plate is civilian issue, though it's likely the owner has something to do with the major Coast Guard base in Alameda.


Of course, the most important accessory is the Guinness bottle opener by the driver's door.

What the heck, let's have a poll to brighten our Monday gloom!

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I'm sure as hell no expert on these things, but a friend of mine in Orange County had one of these ambulances. His was a former Army machine he bought for $150, had been rolled at least once, and was used only for desert hoonage with a Suicidal Tendencies soundtrack on a bungied-down boombox in the back. The ride was wheelbarrow-over-cobblestones-esque and the top speed was about 50; we'd all scream "MEDIC!" after a particularly spine-compressing bump.


Back when Alameda's Navy base was second only to San Diego's on the West Coast, the skies were full of A-6s and P-3s and the streets were full of gray Navy trucks. You'd also see some Marine Corps vehicles once in a while, but Air Force? Probably this truck would have been vandalized by enraged seamen back in the day. Anchors aweigh!


This ambulance clearly runs (or at least rolls), since I've seen it in different parking spaces, but I have yet to set it rumbling down the ave.


Anyway, other than the general era (1950s) and the Dodge origins, I can't nail down the exact model of this thing. Military-vehicle experts, please fill us in!

Check out that cool Auto Lite blackout headlight! I couldn't see a siren anywhere; if it lacks one, I hope the owner is scouring eBay for a replacement. An ambulance needs a siren!

Who else but the Russians could ever dream up a corkscrew drive system? (Seriously, who?) You'd be hard pressed to find a more expressive conjugation of Russian brutalism and theater of the absurd in the automotive world. Actually you don't have to look that hard. I'm just glad we're all friends again. [Thanks to Alexander for the tip.] – Mike Spinelli

Related:
Because We Could All Use More Ekranoplan in Our Lives [internal]

Just a friendly reminder. Nothing rocks your butt off like an ekranoplan. Nothing. – Davey G. Johnson

Related:
Give the People What They Want: Ekranoplans For All! [Internal]

So far, all the Down On The Alameda Street cars have been, well, cars. But old trucks are cool, too, and it goes without saying that we approve of any street-driven vehicle with six-wheel-drive...

I've seen this thing around town enough to know that the owner doesn't just dust it off for the occasional car show; this war wagon goes out and gets the groceries!

See, all those SUV posers who say they "need" four-wheel-drive when we all know their tires have never left asphalt... the Pinzgauer lets them know their ersatz-o-phalli come up woefully short.

But you know if The Big One hits, this thing is going to be cruising over the rubble like so many speed bumps!

Now, if we had one of these as the Official Jalopnik Staff Car (we're working on it, though they're still balking on getting us an Official Staff Trabant) we'd pretty much have to put spinners on all six wheels and as many 9' whip antennas as we could fit.

The Steyr logo indicates this Pinzgauer was built before 1985; perhaps some of our all-wise commenters can give us a more accurate date on this vehicle. – Murilee Martin

Pinzgauer High Mobility All-Terrain Vehicle [Wikipedia]

Related:
Boy, Where's The Feuer? [internal]

To Joe Strummer and Mick Jones, the Gates of the West may have been New York City. Or Saint Louis. Or San Francisco, where they holed up to record overdubs and vocal tracks for Give 'Em Enough Rope with Sandy "More Cowbell" Pearlman. But for many returning soldiers at the end of World War II, the Gates of the West were the breakwaters of San Pedro Bay, at the dangling, southwesterly tip of Los Angeles. Last night, Kasey Dubspeed and I did a runner from the coast up to Cole Coonce's place in Eagle Rock (or "Buzzard Boulder," as Cole perennially refers to it) for his annual Memorial Day barbeque. Cole's backyard is somehow an odd nexus of Los Angeles culture of the city's Golden Age. I spent much of the evening chatting with fashion-and-film-industry people, but at Cole's, one may just as likely end up in a conversation with a Top Fuel driver, a cycling fanatic or a random person who saw the Germs like 48 times and lived to tell the tale. The Second War, as Mike Watt refers to it, gave the world Los Angeles — a diverse, wonderful, maddening, depressing, stunning, sick megalopolis. The GIs who stepped off the boat here after the cessation of hostilities gave us hot rodding.

As I've stated before, hot rods were one of the first things that captured my imagination as a child. T-Buckets were common in Sacramento in those days, and I grew up a mile from what was the largest speed shop in Northern California: Tognotti's Auto World. Now and then, my dad would go up there to pick up a mundane part for our Belvedere or Catalina and I'd stare at the Weiand blowers on the wall and wished he was buying one of those; that it'd stick through the hood of the oxidized Pontiac that his students in the ghetto referred to as "Mr. Johnson's rustproof car."

The girl down the street, my first kiss, had a couple of older brothers who bought, crashed and sold musclecars like it was nothing. Years after they left home, there was still an Edelbrock sticker in her mom's garage window. Spun your SS396 Chevelle into a light pole? No problem. You could pick up a GTO next week for under a grand, and living at home with mom as a teenager, it was no problem. The guys who'd picked them up ten years before had wives. They'd become sensible.

But it was the same thing with the rodders after the war. They came home. Got off the boat in San Pedro. Bought homes in Burbank, Bellflower and Long Beach. Everyone had a used car. And in '47, when automotive production began again, 1930s cars were being offloaded; the new now thing was required immediately. And even with that, Ford was on the verge of coming apart at the seams until '49, when they dropped the archetypical shoebox, one of the most important cars in the company's history. But the mechanics who came home from the airfields in Okinawa, Truk, Tarawa and England gravitated here, flush with skills honed working on Merlins and Wasp Majors, some of the most powerful reciprocating engines ever built. They directly benefited from being up close and personal with the bleeding edge of accelerated powertrain technology, with access to plenty of war-surplus scrap. Drop tanks that hadn't been jettisoned when a Focke-Wulf 190 came into view became raw fodder for the construction of Land Speed Record vehicles.

For a lot of guys who came home, it was something to do. They'd gone out and been part of something impossible; the subjugation of two aggressors who'd had a flaming head start on us. And they pulled it off in less time than we've been in Iraq. Asses kicked; names taken. Is it any wonder that they came back and started wondering how they could apply both their bravado and skills to their cars?

The Big Three actually picked up on this pretty early on, and speed companies like Iskenderian did a lot of backdoor development work for the major automakers. For the small cam-grinders and manifold manufacturers of the world, who were in with the guys on the lakes and the dragstrips, it was a boon, as they got access to the latest engines from Detroit. Detroit, however, got something far more valuable — bona-fide ears to the street that served them well a decade-and-a-half later at the beginning of the musclecar era.

My uncle is in his 70s now, and his days in retirement are spent hanging out, wrenching on a couple of Deuces and a Model A panel. When I saw him over Easter, he said to me, "Dave, do you think the hot rod thing is falling off? Because it seems like it to me."

Very few people into rods are under 30 these days. Inexpensive, serviceable used iron is too scarce, and good-quality aftermarket stuff is too pricey. Hot rods were anachronisms when they first happened. But for guys my age and older, they were always around. Now, they are anachronisms, full-stop. They're not so much a shared cultural touchstone, but rather a touchstone of a bygone era.

That said, limiting the hot-rod spirit to pre-'49 cars seems silly these days. I was talking to Richard Rawlings last week. He picked up an old Auburn and is mechanically restoring it and modifying it, but basically leaving the body as is. He wants to take it to Pebble Beach just to fuck with people's perceptions (knowing full-well it'd never end up on the green at the Concours). I told him that he should put a Ford dash in it. Rawlings got the joke, but I realized that these days, there are fewer and fewer people who would. Installing an Auburn dash in a '30s Ford was a common modification for guys who wanted to add a little class to their rides. It's a funny in-joke between two guys of a dwindling number.

Nevertheless, those soldiers who stepped off the boat in Southern California after the war, or the men and women who came down here seeking work at the plants from El Segundo to San Diego; who picked up an after-school job at a neighborhood machine shop that supplied those plants as a way to buy his first car? We have those guys to thank for the spirit of hot rodding.

I have little use for the blanket-propagandist term, "The Greatest Generation." I absolutely hate it when I get one of those, "If you can speak English, thank a veteran" mass e-mails. It smacks of grotesque, ignorant jingoism. If I'm giving thanks to people for the language that allows me to make my living, I thank the Indo-Europeans, Noah Webster, generations of OED staffers, William Shakespeare, various Anglo-Saxons, Saxon and my mom and dad. Plus, although it's rusty now, I suppose I should thank Otto von Bismarck for spearheading the standardization of the German language; a codification that allowed a spastic Austrian with funny facial hair to rally a nation to a sinister end through propaganda and terror.

However, geopolitics, thumbs in the eyes of those who venerate our current administration and rah-rah Americanism aside, if you're driving a modified car today, thank a veteran. – Davey G. Johnson

"Fast as a Shark" is a weekly electronic broadside aimed at what has been historically right and terribly wrong with the autmotive industry and culture. And yeah, we're pretty sure Udo Dirkschneider never flew an Me 163. Rocket Flea Skyward!

Related:
In Soviet Russia, Pobeda Customizes YOU! [Internal]

The Russians are great at building fearsome, crazy things. Take, for example, the AH-64 Apache. It's not cute. It's certainly deadly. But is it nearly as scary as the Mil Hind? That thing was so nuttily freakish that under some circumstances it was in danger of falling out of the sky if it stopped moving! Or say, the Antonov An-225. Bigger than a C-5, and definitely more imposing. Plus, the guys who fly them these days are known to barbeque on the upper deck. But even crazier (and somehow an amalgam of the two in our mind) is the Lun-class ekranoplan, which is like a high-speed flying boat that never gets more than a few feet off the water. Click the video and tell us you don't wet your pants in a mixture of glee and terror when the thing looses one of its six Sunburn anti-ship missiles. Go ahead. Tell us. We long to see one hurtling across the Bonneville Salt Flats. Somebody make this happen. – Davey G. Johnson

Related:
Partition Number One! Retro Russian Lada Ad [Internal]

Popular Mechanics reports on The US Army's new a hybrid-electric drivetrain, which is battery-dominant and employs a diesel engine as generator. It's the driving force behind the Aggressor, the latest in a string of prototype alternative mobility vehicles (AMVs) for military ground operations requiring speed and stealth, such as recon and surveillance. By way of the e-motor's massive torque, the Aggressor can get from zero to 40 mph in four seconds and tops out at 80 mph. It also sports a "silent mode" giving the high-tech jeep a lower thermal signature, and making it less detectable to night vision specs. And maybe if it proves itself on the mean streets of Baghdad, some rich Austrian dude will order one for civilian use, sparking a revolution in the SUV market. Hey, it could happen. – Mike Spinelli

Army's Diesel-Electric 'Aggressor' Vehicle Could Be Iraq's First Hybrid [Popular Mechanics via Carscoop]

Related:
Bon Soir, Mofos: It's the VBL!; More on the Georgia Tech Ultra AP [internal]

Last night, we were considering the Loverman and thought about his old band, Tarawa. Now, Tarawa circa late 1943 is no place for a Loverman. In fact, it was more appropriate for his inverse, the Fighterman. And verily did the Fightermen arrive courtesy of the Japanese and American armed forces. And when it came time for the American soldiers to re-take the small island in a brutal battle of attrition, some came ashore in The LVT — also known as the Amtrac — an amphibious, tracked troop carrier able to carry 24 soldiers. And while the Amtracs didn't fare so well at Tarawa, they went on to play a role throughout the next two years of the war, seeing service in both the Pacific and European theatres. We want one with a howitzer. – Davey G. Johnson

Landing Vehicle Tracked [Wikipedia]

Related:
The Sherman DD: America's Floating Tank [Internal]

Latest on the list of oddball vehicles Los Jalops must hold in our tender, loving arms is the M-422 Mighty Mite. Developed as a helicopter-transportable general-purpose vehicle for the fighting men of the USMC in a time when choppers weren't exactly muscle-bound studs, the small 4x4 nevertheless featured some cool, innovative and obscure tech. The diminutive Jeeplet was designed by a group that included some ex-Bantam types who fathered the OG GP made famous in WWII and sported an aluminum body, independent front-and-rear suspension, and a 55-horse 108-inch AMC air-cooled V4. We totally want one for French Riviera sand drags against Fiat Jollys. – Davey G. Johnson

The Forgotten Marine [Off-Road Adventures]

Related:
Blowing Up Uday's Rambo Lambo [Internal]

It can be safely said that we were no great fans of Saddam Hussein's son Uday. But we do feel sorry for his poor, beleagured Lamborghini LM002. Apparently a group of American soldiers, not realizing what the vehicle was, decided that it would be an ideal platform for studying the effects of a car bomb on a concrete barrier. Already well-beaten when the test began, the end result could safely be referred to as smithereens. – Davey G. Johnson

Uday Hussein Lamborghini LM002 [Lamborghini Registry]

Related:
What Would a Dolphin Painter Drive: A Rambo Lambo, of Course [Internal]

The albatross began with his vengeance early with this one. While the VW-based Schwimmwagen was a largely successful amphibous vehicle and its larger sister the DUKW entertained a measure of success at Normandy and remains affectionately remembered today, the Ford GPA was simply not the cat's pajamas. In low-water fording situation, the standard Willys machine often did better, and the Seep suffered a fate not dissimilar from a painted ship upon a painted ocean. It wasn't exactly the answer to a question nobody asked, but it was maybe at best a hard C response to what at the time was a rather pressing query. Bruce, large Amercan truckage, 1. Seep, not so much. – Davey G. Johnson

Ford GPA [Wikipedia]

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Must... Have... Amphicar... [Internal]

As commenter DougN pointed out earlier, Ferdiand Porsche's design for the Tiger tank was passed over for a design by Henschel. However, an armor-hungry Wehrmacht did end up with a retooled version of Porsche's Tiger in tank-killer guise. The Ferdinand had its air-cooled Porsche powerplants yanked and replaced with a pair of 300hp Maybach engines used to power electric motors. Fuel economy was an astonishing 1/4mpg. Fitted with a Krupp 88mm gun, the Ferdinands fared poorly at Kursk, where nearly half the force was lost.

The surviving vehicles were brought back to Germany, upgraded and by Hitlerian decree, took on the name Elefant. Only two examples survive today. One captured at Kursk by the Russians and one taken by the Americans at Anzio. We assume the Cayenne hybrid will be more efficient, even if it may be a white Elefant. – Davey G. Johnson

Elefant [Wikipedia]

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Birthed from the loins of the K belwagen, which was itself descended from Ferdinand Porsche's KdF-Wagen design (known eventually to the plebes as the Beetle), the Schwimmwagen was one of the radder wee beasties of the Second World War. 1,130 cc quadrazontal mill, a boat-type hull, low-range four-wheel drive and a swing-a-way propeller in the back made the Schwimmwagen quite the paragon of utility. We'll take two.

German Light Amphibious Car [Lone Sentry]

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What's That Volkswagen Thing? VW Humbug [Internal]

Yeah, see, it's perfect for checking out underage girls, see? You got your turret, you got your gunslits there; heck, if her dad comes after you with a shotgun, what's he gonna do? Take away your birthday? Oh, wait, Humber, not Humbert?. Like the Rootes Group company; right they took the Super Snipe chassis and put that there tank-like body on it and ran all over Western Europe blowing up the Germans real good like while reconnoitering various and sundry things. I gotcha now. Sorry 'bout that teenage girl thing. You know, sometimes straight-six vehicles make my brain go a bit loopy, y'know? Yeah, you know. – Davey G. Johnson

Humber Light Reconnaissance Car Mk II [WarWheels]

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Okay, so it's not a car, a bike or even a hovercraft. It doesn't transform into anything. It apparently didn't even work all that well in its designed capacity. What is it? It's the WWII Kaiten, a Japanese invention of dubious genius that was designed to be a piloted torpedo. Motor in the back, a ton-and-a-half of HE in the nose and one or two sailors in the middle. To be honest, we can't decide whether we think it's totally rad or ridiculously creepy. Somehow, though, we can't help but applaud its desperate spirit. – Davey G. Johnson

Kaiten Suicide Submarines [Internal]

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One may recall Stanley, the robo-Touareg that won the 2nd DARPA Grand Challenge. Well, now the boffins in Paly are working a successor to the SUV, based on a Passat known as Junior. Junior's designed to navigate an urban environment, rather than a desert off-road course. DARPA plans to announce the location of the next race, to be held November 3rd, sometime in October. Meanwhile we're still waiting for information on the atomic-powered Saab 96 entry from Venture Industries. – Davey G. Johnson

Urban road race to test limits of robotic cars [Reuters]

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Next DARPA Grand Challenge to be Held on City Streets [Internal]

Yes, bro-hams, the father of the Quattro Coup , terror of Group B, was a 75-hp military vehicle designed to supplant the Volkswagen Thing. It's the Iltis, and just like the G-Wagen, it's a German vehicle appropriated by the Estonians in case the boys in Riga decided to get fresh. Conceived after Volkswagen's purchase of Auto Union, it's a kitbash of VW, Audi and DKW technology that gained favor with forces all over the globe, yet sadly, its time is passing. Still, the Belgians, Canadians and Germans cling to their Ilti. We cling to it, too. – Davey G. Johnson

Volkswagen Iltis [Wikipedia]

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Tell the Estonian Defense Forces: New Mercedes G-Wagon's Just a Little Different [Internal]