Jalopnik: Car Sex

Illinois Sheriff can’t quit station wagon sex

Wes Siler — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 15:30:00 EST

"Two guys don't usually do this stuff at home," justified a man caught engaging in a sex act with the local sheriff, as to why they were performing said sex act in a 1994 Ford Escort station wagon parked behind an Irish bar. More »

Fuel efficiency never looked so good

Wes Siler — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 14:30:00 EST

"Horsepower is old news. Big MPGs are what it's all about," reads the promotional blurb for the Pump Rebels 2012 Calendar. More »

This police officer was caught on video having sex on the hood of a car

Matt Hardigree — Tue, 30 Aug 2011 16:00:00 EDT

This is a surveillance photo of a New Mexico State Trooper caught strip-searching a random woman with his penis on the hood of a car. What's even more funny? There's a prairie dog sitting there watching. More »

This man was busted for drinking, having sex while driving

Mike Spinelli — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 15:00:00 EDT

Police spotted 58-year-old George E. Howard swigging from a can of beer while driving recklessly. But that wasn't all he was busted for. No, the Louisville man was also busted for having sex while driving after police said a female passenger was "bent over with her head between his legs." More »

Does how you drive determine how good you are at sex?

Mike Spinelli — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 12:30:00 EDT

Gentlemen, the way you drive is apparently a giveaway to women on how you'll, er, behave between the sheets. Thus spake Hoda Kotb, co-host of the Today show's 73rd hour, who will never look at cab drivers the same way again. More »

The Ten Best Cars To Have Sex In

Matt Hardigree — Mon, 03 Jan 2011 11:00:00 EST

Teens in the '20s referred to cars as "struggle buggies" because they were ideal for humping covertly. A century later it's still true. With the help of our flexible readers, we've identified these ten best cars to have sex in. More »

Sate Your Desire For Women Strapped Into Seat Belts

Ray Wert — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 16:00:00 EDT

How is it there are three separate Yahoo! groups — one with over 1000 members — dedicated to the fetish of seat belts (and women strapped into them) and we've only just now found them? (Links are probably NSFW) More »

Undressing, Sexual Acts Among Top Activities While Driving

Matt Hardigree — Tue, 25 May 2010 16:00:00 EDT

According to a recent survey, approximately 35% of drivers have undressed or changed clothes while driving, 29% of drivers admit to kissing while in motion, and another 15% say they've engaged in sexual acts while in the driver's seat. More »

Hustler Hearts Jalopnik

Ray Wert — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 15:30:00 EDT

Hustler loved our Question of the Day today. [Hustler (NSFW)] More »

It's True, Old Volvos Can Be Sexy

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 16:00:00 EDT

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This image may be as old as the Internet, but all those Volvo Wagon owners out there (Matt) need to be reminded their cars can in fact be sexy — even if it just takes a little creative dust adjustment. More »

Car Crash Leaves Woman In Persistent State Of Sexual Arousal

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 17:15:00 EST

Two years ago Joleen Baughman was in a car crash and damaged a nerve in her pelvis, one which acts as a floodgate for sexual arousal, since then she's been constantly turned on with no relief in sight. More »

Dutchman Flips Tractor Trailer While Masturbating, Doesn't Stop

Ben Wojdyla — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 15:30:00 EDT

A high-on-drugs Dutch trucker en route to Gothenburg, Sweden, was masturbating while driving and lost control, flipping the truck and blocking multiple lanes of traffic. While in the wreckage, he kept masturbating. Under police interrogation, he kept masturbating. That's determination. More »

My Car Is My Lover: Dragons Get Documentary

Wes Siler — Tue, 26 May 2009 18:30:00 EDT

Ever needed the whole Dragons thing explained in an hour-long documentary? Yeah, us neither, but England's Channel 5 has done just that with "My Car Is My Lover." NSFW More »

Do Not Masturbate In Your Sebring While Wearing Panties

Ben Wojdyla — Wed, 20 May 2009 17:30:00 EDT

Andrew Jones was en-route for a rendezvous with his lady-friend, masturbating in his Sebring while they talked dirty via cell phone. He was also wearing panties and stockings. And carrying drugs. Bonus poll below. More »

How To Have Sex In A Car, Redux

Ray Wert — Wed, 13 May 2009 17:30:00 EDT

We're sorta worried for humanity that Jalopnik is so high on this Google search. [Google] More »

Remember To Close Your Sunroof When Masturbating

Ben Wojdyla — Thu, 07 May 2009 15:00:00 EDT

This is an important JaloPSA: If you decide to retire to your car for some personal afternoon-delight, make sure you're not parked next to a tall building with your sunroof open. NSFW. More »

Woman Bites Lover's Penis Off In Car Crash

Ray Wert — Tue, 05 May 2009 17:45:00 EDT

Headline: "Woman Bites Lover's Penis Off In Car Crash." No, seriously. [Metro.co.uk] More »

Norwegian Couple Nabbed For High Speed Sex

Ben Wojdyla — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

Norwegian police arrested a motoring couple after observing them engaged in high-speed hanky-panky in their Mazda 323. More »

Have You Ever Wondered Where SUVs Come From?

Wes Siler — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 15:30:00 EST

If you were one of the 12 people who watched "Southland Tales" then you know what's coming: a pair of SUVs. Literally. And yes, it's NSFW. More »

Why You Don't Take Photos Of Yourself Humping A Nissan GT-R

Ben Wojdyla — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 16:40:00 EST

You've seen still images of people humping a Nissan GT-R before. But have you seen an animated image of Godzilla humping? Click below for the semi-NSFW dragon-on-Godzilla image below. More »

Sex With Cars All The Rage In Scotland

Travis Hudson — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:20:00 EDT

It must be car sex day around these parts because now another dragon has surfaced in Scotland. An 18-year-old is being accused of running around his Crannog Way, Kilwinning neighborhood naked and humping every vehicle in sight. Callum Ainsworth, the dragon in question, has denied the accusations and will face a trial this summer on charges of public indecency. Let's just hope he went for the tailpipe like any professional car-humper, rather than compromising the integrity of the car's body work. (Thanks, Vanessa) [Irvine Times via BB] (Image via Getty) More »

Car Fuckers Documented by Channel 5, Horseman Number 4 Also Spotted

Ben Wojdyla — Tue, 20 May 2008 09:30:00 EDT

There's not enough time in the world for the image of British mechanic Chris Donald with his hoo hoo in a cars tailpipe to fade, there are just some things you can't unsee. After the car sex aficionado scarred out fragile little minds, we assumed it was the last we'd see of that little proclivity, turns out Channel 5 isn't going to let that dead dog lie. Nope, instead they're making a documentary set to air on Channel 5 detailing the lives of two-self proclaimed "mechaphiles." Jesus, they've named it. The end of the world is nigh. (Thanks (?) for the tip Larry) [Read more at TVThrong, video from Youtube] More »