Welcome to Jalopnik Obscura, where we highlight the whacky, wonderful, and downright weird automotive videos from around the web. Watch and prepare to bathe in the madness.

People say Canada's boring, but oh how wrong they are. Apparently there are maniacs running around with machetes and swords, and if you're not careful you may just get stabbed in the face. Especially if it's the 1980s, and especially if you're in Newfoundland.

This video, originally found by Everything is Terrible, is a perfect example of the glories found in police training videos. There's a man in pleated sweatpants, which I'm pretty sure he made on his own since those have never been on sale anywhere in the history of the planet, a beautiful Atlantic Canadian accent, with its sonorous tones of "WHY DON'CHOO LET ME GOHHH," profuse apologizing from all parties, and a Mick Foley clone who stabs a cop in the face, presumably because the cop was willing to accept anything with a picture and the guy's name on it as an acceptable form of driver's license . Don't worry, though, our Canadian hero has the air of confidence that only a fully functioning medical system brings:

Avoid 1980s Canada If You're A CopS

There's also a man clearly displaying the fencing skills of someone familiar with the epee.

Holy crap, where did that guy get a machete? And is that Roberto from Futurama?

Isn't the Internet swell.