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While arresting a naked couple spotted running nude on the side of the road, Georgia police were startled when the couple revealed they had given LSD to "Oscar." It turns out Oscar is a Dachshund hit by a car. Thankfully, he survived. More »
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In one of the more bizarre animal automotive rescues we've seen, a Texas mechanic freed a red-tailed hawk from the grille of a Lexus it was jammed into after a high-speed highway collision. The result? "Grille Hawk" — the most adorable photo of a hawk ever. More »
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We told you this week Mazda has to recall 52,000 Mazda6 sedans because spiders like to nest in its fuel system, but that's not the worst thing a spider can do in your car. According to the Detroit News, although animals are involved in a very minor percentage of fatal crashes, Spiders, Bees and other insects are very high on the list of dangerous in car distractions that can lead to accidents. More »
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Meet Bailey D. Buffalo Jr., a "tame" 1,600-lb. bison owned by a Canadian family that carries him around via roofless Pontiac Parisienne. It's probably the only instance of a buffalo scalping a chief. More »
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This male koala in southeastern Australia survived being hit by a Ford Falcon at 50 mph and then kept his adorableness for the 10-mile ride to a veterinarian. No word on who let Bindi Irwin drive. (H/t to Kvit!) [NineMSN] More »
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A Colorado brown bear got trapped inside a car after opening the door in search of a sandwich. When the door closed, the bear panicked, managed to knock the car into neutral, and rolled into some nearby trees. More »
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Jalopnik super friend Brett Berk recently penned a wisecracking story comparing ten well-known cars to "adorable" animals. The Lincoln MKS made the list, although we're not quite sure how walruses are adorable. [Vanity Fair] More »
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Safety-obsessed Germans are appalled that 27 people were killed in collisions with animals there last year. Their response? Painting a VW Golf orange and running it through a bunch of foam animals. Won't somebody think of the piglets? More »
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The CEO of the Richmond, VA SPCA left her blind and deaf 16-year old dog locked in her car on a 91-degree day. Predictably, it died of kidney failure. She doesn't plan to resign. [AOL] More »
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Auto manufacturers frequently use animals as inspiration for names. While many can identify the cars by sight, do you think you can do the opposite and name the cars by seeing a picture of the animal inspiring the name? More »
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Proving that "Flight of the Conchords" is completely accurate, Mitsubishi New Zealand is giving away free goats with every Triton truck. But what about goat flu? One of the best press releases ever below. More »
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This Honda Civic has been completely entrapped by a pack of rare caterpillars along with the rest of the Dutch street it's been parked on. Holland's response? They'll turn into butterflies in four weeks anyways. More »
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Shocked motorists have spotted an Austrian softie who uses his tiny VW to relocate his beloved calves wherever they might need to go. More »
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These pictures were captured during a deadly game of hide-and-seek between a hungry polar bear and an Alaskan man who stumbled into its path. More »
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California Assemblyman Bill Maze is proposing a new law that would make driving with an animal in your lap illegal and punishable by a $35 fine. The law passed through the California Assembly this week and will be making its way to the Senate. It's a pretty obvious that those crazy old cougars that drive around with their miniature toy dogs in their laps pose a giant risk to other motorists so there's no reason not to go ahead with this law. More »
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We understand the Ford Ka is a roomy vehicle. Hell, it's even big enough for James Bond and many Bond girls, but the means this Spanish commercial goes to in order to express that notion is going to cause us to have some serious trouble sleeping tonight. The first one to identify what the hell those creatures are gets a cookie. [Neatorama] More »
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We all know the SPCA, PETA and other groups get their knickers in a bunch over leaving animals in cars, and rightly so. Much to the delight of these organizations, Hotdog is a new gadget that will to take a step forward toward keeping pets in overheating cars. This device connects into your cars electrical system and will actively monitor the temperature inside of the car. More »
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All the credibility you gained driving that F-350 will be thrown out the window once the guys catch you rocking a Puphut in your big, beastly truck. Puphut is what it says it is: a hut, for your truck, so your dog can stay nice and protected when you are hauling him around town. Back off for a second, PETA, and listen. Dogs can take the weather and unless you drive around all day with your dog in the bed, I'm more than sure Old Yeller will be fine for the 10 minute trip to the hardware store. More »
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New Jersey police are claiming that a black bear is the prime suspect in a car theft in Vernon Township. Apparently, the bear was attracted to the sweets inside the car and accidentally released the emergency brake. The vehicle was found down the road, full of bear hair and broken glass. This thing should be expected if we continue to destroy crime-fighting alligators. I'll take the alligator over the bear any day. [LOL.CO.ZA] More »
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1,400 hundred chickens escaped captivity and 400 were killed in a tragic road accident in Scotland early this morning. The tractor-trailer carrying them jack-knifed on the A40 near Haggs, releasing the birds and causing chaos on area roads. It took Specialist Chicken Handlers 9-hours to clear the road of the fowl, which had been destined for an area abattoir. [Via BBC News] More »
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A study conducted by Yale and the University of California has found that the human brain is more attuned to detecting animal than mechanical motion. The results could point the way for safer cars being made in the image of wildlife. In tests, subjects were over three times as likely to recognize motion in animals than in cars. Quoted in The Telegraph, Professor Leda Cosmides of the University of California said, "It may seem fanciful, but it is possible that painting cars to look more like animals might increase attentional monitoring of them." The Telegraph Photo credit: Sister72 More »
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A roadside device capable of scaring deer away from the road when vehicles approach is being tested in New Jersey. Capable of detecting headlights long before the animals become dazzled, it emits a loud noise and flashes a blue strobe light when cars come within 150 yards. 38 have been installed on a stretch of road near Fort Dix notorious for accidents involving deer. Its inventors, JAFA Technologies, say the devices will cost about $150 each. [Via NJ.com] More »
]]> http://jalopnik.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=288857&view=rss&microfeed=true In Australia, there are many wonderous things — utes, sheilas, The Great Barrier Reef, Paul Hogan and road trains — not to mention a rather abundant diversity of marsupials. Some of these marsupials are kangaroos. Sometimes, kangaroos end up where they're not supposed to be, such as on the track at Bathurst during a motor racing competition. More »
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Somewhere along that great ribbon of asphalt and concrete that links The City to the Big Apple, there is a pond. More specifically, that pond is in Utah. And in that Utahn pond, gulls congregate. Their flight path to said pond takes them across Interstate Eighty. And when the dumb bird misjudges the speed of oncoming traffic, well, they tend to wind up even more kaput than a Chevy Vega attempting Le Mans. Also of note: when the Utah Division of Wildlife Resources comes across large, hazardous roadkill, they drag it out into the desert for scavenger snacktime. More »
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We had a pal in college who liked to wear a black trenchcoat, a Gecko T-shirt and a ring on a lanyard around his neck with a silver ring hanging from it. After a year or so of knowing him, we actually looked at said ring and noticed it had "The Crow" engraved in it. Needless to say, he wasn't exactly beating the ladies off with a stick, except for that one exceedingly odd girl who spoke Klingon. Regardless, he is a smart, sharp dude who now occasionally appears on television. And he dresses better these days. In the UK, however, one particular crow hasn't smartened up. He's horny and territorrial, and when he sees his reflection in the roof of an automobile, he has a tendency to attack it as if it were a romantic rival. Either that, or he's just a really, really big fan of Black Flag's Damaged album and doesn't have a mirror handy. – Davey G. Johnson More »
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A belligerent she-tiger, apparently angry that a motorist took the life of one of her cubs, has gone about attacking motor vehicles in eastern Russia. The big cat is one of about 450 tigers remaining in the Maritime and the Khabarovsk regions, and has been seen on the side of the road with a dead cub in her jaws, lashing out at cars. Russian officials figure that although their attempts to scare the tiger away have failed, the animal will go away in a few days. In the meantime, if you're in the area, beware of the eyes of the cat in the black and blue. Something is coming for you. Look out! – Davey G. Johnson More »
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This dog-obsessiveness has to stop. Look, we've been a dog owner, and some dogs are really, really amazing creatures. However, that does not mean that they are mentally or physically equipped to operate a motor vehicle on public roads. This, however, did not stop a Mongolian woman known only as Ms. Li from attempting to teach her canine to drive, resulting in some measure of a fender-bender. This anthromorphization of pets has gotta stop before somebody gets killed. After all, dog is a dog. A duck is a duck. But a cat is a person. [Thanks to prplhaze for the tip.] More »
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Much like dogs love trucks, yellowjackets apparently love cars. We discovered this the hard way a few years back when a mean-spirited stinging insect jabbed us in the back while we were leaving a stoplight, causing us nearly to put our old Legend into a hedge. Nevertheless, we're once again quite stoked that we don't live in Alabama, as superhives have developed throughout the southern part of the state, including one that entirely consumed the interior of a 1955 Chevrolet (could this be some sort of UAW metaphor?). Scientists say it has to do with the unseasonably mild winter the state had last year, but whatever the cause, we've just totally got the jibblies right now. Eep. [Thanks to Michael for the tip.] More »
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Senate Bill 1806, written by Democratic State Senator Liz Figueroa, is headed to Ahnulds desk. The bill, if the Governator signs it into law, would impose a fines of up to $500 and as much as six months in jail for leaving an animal in a hot car. Studies have show that in-car temperatures can hit 132 degrees Farenheit in as little as five minutes on a day with an 86-degree ambient temperature. It also allows animal control officials to break into a vehicle to free the pet, something that could previously only be done by police. Good idea? Or more state nannying? More »
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As an odd, cred-killing side-note, one Jalopnik was actually in both the El Camino High Madrigal choir, as well as the Central Valley Regional Honor Choir with American Idol contestant Mandisa Hundley, who is a very nice woman and only accused us of being a racist once, when we, as a part of a pre-Homecoming stunt, were the ringleader in a game of Musical Pies and ended up dumping a pan full of cream onto a black girl's head, not realizing that due to the texture of African-bred hair that dairy products are hard to get out. More »
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Faithful tipster Scott sent over this bit from ESPN regarding Champ Car-driver Cristiano da Matta's collision with a deer during a practice session at Elkhart Lake. Cristiano is currently hospitalized in critical condition, in a medically-induced coma, due to a subdural hematoma. In layman's terms, it means that the accident resulted in a burst blood vessel on the surface of his brain. Stefan Johannson — who courteously dropped off the Bullrun so's we could snake his room at the W Hotel in San Diego — also had a run-in with a deer back in '87 while racing F1 for McLaren in Austria. He comments, "I got a hell of a fright, I can tell you. And the thing is that the deer was apparently running around in the woods and the field for some time but no one thought to have practice stopped." More »
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We once almost crashed our car due to an errant yellowjacket that stung us as we took off from a stoplight, but that's nothing compared to what a sixteen-year-old girl in Indiana had to contend with when she lost control of her SUV on a gravel road and wrapped it around a tree. But not just any tree. A tree that happened to have many, many bees in it. And not happy, benign bees, but bees angry that some impetuous human would assault the location of their hive with a few tons of steel. More »
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Doing Philo Beddoe's simian turn-signal Clyde one better, it seems that at some point, somewhere along the line, a chimpanzee taught himself to operate a motor vehicle. Needless to say, the rivalry between the chimp/orangutan camps just went up a notch. More »
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Mary Stone of Ogden, UT, was the victim of a vehicular assault perpetrated by a canine officer of the law. The dog, Ranger, was left in an idling pickup truck while his handler responded to a domestic disturbance call. Ranger then knocked the vehicle into gear, which ran down Stone as she checked her mail. She remains hospitalized with a cracked pelvis and coccyx. No word on whether Ranger faces disciplinary action at this time. [Thanks to Scott for the tip.] More »
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We, like Colbert Report host Stephen Colbert, have a fear bordering on terror when it comes to bears. The thought of what happened to the owners of a vintage red 1964 Buick convertible this holiday weekend over in Lake Tahoe gives us the chills. A hungry bear cub decided a little pick-a-nick basket was the way to go, and sat down in the back seat for a lovely little luncheon of barbeque-chicken-and-jalapeno pizza — and then washed it all down with a swig of Jack Daniels, Absolut vodka and tonic and a beer the bear snagged from the cooler. Let's be clear here folks — we don't care how much you don't want to finish that pizza — stop feeding the bears! It only encourages them. And as we can see, they're now willing to do just about anything to get what they really want — our liquor. More »
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In the interest of keeping star commenter TexansAreHot happy, here's one more item from the Lone Star State. (As an aside, did y'all know that the star on the California flag — which might possibly be the best flag ever, although we're partial to the DC flag, too — was added to show solidarity with Texas?) Digressions aside, a crew of peacocks has been attacking vehicles in an Arlington, Texas neighborhood. More »
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When was the last time you were in a locale that boasted an Equine Liaison Officer? Well, rural Hampshire, England has one by the name of Derek Grist, and he's not exactly thrilled with all of the cars flying the Union Jack during the runup to the World Cup. Why? Because the waving flags apparently have the capacity to spook horses, causing them to bolt. Apparently, the horses are roughly as amenable to British subjugation as the Indians, Scots, Irish, Sex Pistols and Farago. More »
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An angry/ scared/out-of-its -element buffalo got into a scuffle with Chinese police and came out on the losing end of a rifleman's bullet. After wandering onto an expressway, the animal drew the attention of police, who attempted to shoo it away using their cars. Apparently, the buffalo didn't care for this tactic and began charging the cars. The fuzz then opened fire with their gats, but to no avail; the animal wasn't going down like that. It was eventually taken down by a sharpshooter as it fled iinto a populated area. Rest easy, noble buffalo. You went down bravely. More »
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• EBay can't bring your dead dad back, but they can bring you back his car. [vnunet]
• What's a good boy to do on Purim when he's looking for a present for his Ema. Everything good is already sold out for Purim, including this antique wooden roadster filled with kosher delicacies. We are still not sure what an antique roadster, truffles and Purim have to do with each other. Meh, who are we to ask? [ConfectionCollection]
• Oh, no...please...no, you MUST be kidding. Ford's doing more nonsensical marketing. And we thought that the concept was finally dying the slow and painful death it deserved after "Meet The Lucky Ones". Yes, we know the music was good. But the idea alas, was not. [VOX]
• A car in Essex swerved to avoid a deer, rolls over, and kills the poor beast. Talk about the law of unintended consequences. [EADT]
• For the 12 millionth time, an auto pundit is asking the following question: Is GM blind to their own problems? [InsideLine]
• As long as a work stoppage doesn't happen for either GM or Ford, S&P predicts things can get better. [Business Week]
• Oh, fudge. Did we forget to mention that 94% of the members of Delphi IUE-CWA Local 717 voted to allow leaders to call a strike against the bankrupt GM supplier. [Detroit News]
• Anyone know of any good Purim parades in Metro Detroit, or do we need to go to Israel to find one? [splitc]

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Okay, this is from last week, and we haven't heard about how effectively the plan panned out, but organizers of a vintage car rally in New Zealand brought in a 40-member karate club to defend the pricey relics from attacking Keas, parrots with exceptionally sharp beaks and a penchant for shiny objects. Why this immediately reminds us of the scene in The Story of Ricky where Yukari Oshima somehow materializes out of the ground and kicks a dog in half for no good reason is obvious. Well, to us, at least. More »
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