Ever gone through a state and wondered "what is shoved up the asses of every cop here?" Jalopnik readers know where the absolute worst traffic cops reside.
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We're not saying that all cops in these areas are horrible, but we are saying that you should think twice before speeding there, as the speed traps will be sneakier and the fines will be heavier. Some of this is legislative, but some of this is also the result of little local fiefdoms.
If there's any place that you've been through where you've been hassled by unbelievably uptight, pedantic cops, let us know in Kinja below. These ten places are far from an exhaustive list of shitty places to get pulled over in the US.
And let us know where you should steer clear of outside the borders of these fair United States. We hear the French autoroutes are murder just before the 24 Hours of Le Mans.
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The police in the south end of Florida are slightly out of control. Miami PD are among some of the worst speeders in the state, having been caught at 120 miles an hour. Of course when you have to deal with offenders like this, we're not surprised Floridian police officers lose it sometimes.
Just as bad as Florida police are Georgia police, who appear to try and get a share of Florida's tourism revenue by laying out huge speeding fines to tourists driving south for vacation.
Philly cops get on this list not for the tickets they hand out, but for the ones they don't. Drivers in Philadelphia are notoriously terrible, and the city could use a few traffic fines to get its drivers in line. Reader Stkkts personally saw a Philly cop not even bat an eye when a guy on a Harley rode past him for the length of a city block while on the sidewalk.
7.) Alameda, CA
We love The City That Rust Forgot and its classic cars, but we dislike its PD, who are happy to pull you over doing 28 in a 25. They have good reason to be dicks; the town is just across the bridge from Oakland, where idiots shut down the highway with donuts.
6.) Wisconsin Dells, WI
This town has a population of less than 3,000 residents, but it's a popular summer tourist destination with about 5 million visitors a year. This means in the summer the cops go crazy ticketing out-of-towners as much as possible, and in the off months the cops have nothing to do, so they ticket people over the most minor offences imaginable. It's a lose-lose.
5.) Elk Grove Village, IL
Illinois' Elk Grove Village has the typical traffic cop problem of a big town/small city of around 30,000 residents. It's big enough that there are plenty of cops, but it's small enough that nothing ever really happens. Again, this leads to bored cops with nothing to do but cite you for inconceivably minor offences as several of our readers can attest.
4.) Military Police
MPs scare the crap out of us. There is no smile, there is no leniency. We are on our best behavior when on a military base of any kind.
3.) Outside Of Seattle
Seattle cops are fine, but once you get out of the city, you can get into some trouble. Of particular concern is Lake Stevens, WA, where two officers recently had to pay $100,000 in fines for breaking into a man's home to arrest him over a traffic violation. The cop actually told the guy, "remember me?"
We would say that the simple rule to driving in Virginia is never exceed anything over five miles an hour over the speed limit. Six over and you'll get a ticket, attest our readers. However we also have a number of readers who were stopped for tints, u-turns, insufficient paperwork for a race car trailer, and much more that has nothing to do with speeding.
You know your state has bad cops when one of your towns (New Rome) make the national news for its speed trap, and gets caught up in so much corruption that the state legally dissolves the town itself.
New Rome aside, the state is still awful for drivers. Reader anonkc tells us he got six points on his license for turning across a lane and was cited for reckless driving for "almost hitting a curb."
Maybe just avoid the state altogether.