Until now I thought that Japan and the U.S. had the market cornered on 1980s car commercials full of irritating jingles, bizarre imagery and lasers, lasers, lasers.

But this ad for the 1988 Chrysler Phantom (which is way better than "LeBaron," P.S.) shows us that Mexico had plenty of weird shit to offer the world as well.

Let's see what we've got here: Gratuitous shot of a woman's legs as she dips her toe into water? Check. A sword rising out of a pool? Check. Digital speedometer in the LeBar-er, Phantom? Check. Tumbleweeds? Check. More shots of legs and feet? Oh yeah. I dunno about you guys, but this makes me want to go out and buy a Phantom like right now.

I can start a bar fight with someone in Spanish but that's about it. Can anyone tell me what the narrator says? Let us know in Kinja below.