Searching for crap angles on the Alfa Romeo 33 StradaleS

Had the Lamborghini Miura not been invented, Franco Scaglione’s Alfa Romeo 33 Stradale from 1967 would be the sexiest car ever built. Here, in this 5-photo series, we attempt to find an angle on it that sucks. Sadly, the Alfa is semi-obscured by a tarp and a McLaren F1 on the first photo. In our search for design fail, please move on to the second image.

Searching for crap angles on the Alfa Romeo 33 StradaleS

The car’s signature black cooling vents, quilted engine surround, understated rear lights and quad tailpipes look gorgeous. In our search for design fail, please move on to the third image.

Searching for crap angles on the Alfa Romeo 33 StradaleS

Sadly, the car’s front fenders and cooling vents look gorgeous (and go well with red pumps). In our search for design fail, please move on to the fourth image.

Searching for crap angles on the Alfa Romeo 33 StradaleS

Sadly, the angle on the tailpipes’ tip is perfectly gorgeous. In our search for design fail, please move on to the fifth, final image.

Searching for crap angles on the Alfa Romeo 33 StradaleS

Sadly, the area where the doors meet the 2.0-liter, 10,000 rpm V8’s air inlets is chaotically gorgeous. Franco Scaglione, one, Jalopnik, zero.

This particular 33 Stradale, one of 18 built, is owned by a certain Clive Joy of the United Kingdom. At last weekend’s Concorso d’Eleganza Villa d’Este, it won the Trofeo BMW Group (best of show by the jury) as well as its class, The Birth of the Supercar. Against a Miura. Lucky Clive Joy.

Searching for crap angles on the Alfa Romeo 33 StradaleS

Bonus image: the license plate of the McLaren F1 parked next to Clive Joy’s Alfa Romeo 33 Stradale. Are you getting the same queasy feeling in your stomach that I’m getting? That there’s a dude out there who can genuinely choose between these two when he leaves home?

All photos by Peter Orosz