Armed man rams stolen pickup into a bar, fixes himself a White RussianS

Stop me if you've heard this one. This guy's craving a white Russian, but the bar's closed. So he steals a pickup, crashes into the bar, fixes a drink, then leads police on a two-county chase. The Dude indeed abides.

Kriss A. Whitney of upstate New York caught the fever for a concoction of vodka, coffee liqueur and light cream, and now faces a multiple-charge cocktail including felony criminal possession of a weapon, criminal possession of stolen property and criminal mischief, not to mention misdemeanor resisting arrest, unlawfully fleeing a police officer, aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle and two counts of reckless endangerment, troopers said. And some traffic tickets.

At least he stayed out of Malibu.